by Daniel Defoe
out of my knowledge again by the currents,or winds, or any other accident. But now I come to a new scene ofmy life.
It happened one day about noon, going towards my boat, I was exceedinglysurprised with the print of a man's naked foot on the shore, which wasvery plain to be seen in the sand: I stood like one thunder-struck, oras if I had seen an apparition; I listened, I looked round me, I couldhear nothing, nor see any thing; I went up to a rising ground to lookfarther: I went up the shore, and down the shore, but it was all one, Icould see no other impression but that one; I went to it again to see ifthere were any more, and to observe if it might not be my fancy; butthere was no room for that, for there was exactly the very print of afoot, toes, heel, and every part of a foot; how it came thither I knewnot, nor could in the least imagine. But after innumerable flutteringthoughts, like a man perfectly confused, and out of myself, I came hometo my mortification, not feeling, as we say, the ground I went on, butterrified to the last degree, looking behind me at every two or threesteps, mistaking every bush and tree, and fancying every stump at adistance to be a man; nor is it possible to describe how many variousshapes an affrighted imagination represented things to me in; how manywild ideas were formed every moment in my fancy, and what strangeunaccountable whimsies came into my thoughts by the way.
When I came to my castle, for so I think I called it ever after this, Ifled into it like one pursued; whether I went over by the ladder, asfirst contrived, or went in at the hole in the rock, which I called adoor, I cannot remember; for never frighted hare fled to cover, or foxto earth, with more terror of mind than I to this retreat.
I had no sleep that night: the farther I was from the occasion of myfright, the greater my apprehensions were; which is something contraryto the nature of such things, and especially to the usual practice ofall creatures in fear. But I was so embarrassed with my own frightfulideas of the thing, that I formed nothing but dismal imaginations tomyself, even though I was now a great way off it. Sometimes I fancied itmust be the devil; and reason joined in with me upon this supposition.For how should any other thing in human shape come into the place? Wherewas the vessel that brought them? What marks were there of any otherfootsteps? And how was it possible a man should come there? But then tothink that Satan should take human shape upon him in such a place wherethere could be no manner of occasion for it, but to leave the print ofhis foot behind him, and that even for no purpose too (for he could notbe sure I should see it:) this was an amazement the other way: Iconsidered that the devil might have found out abundance of other waysto have terrified me, than this of the single print of a foot; that as Ilived quite on the other side of the island, he would never have been sosimple to leave a mark in a place where it was ten thousand to onewhether I should ever see it or not, and in the sand too, which thefirst surge of the sea upon an high wind would have defaced entirely.All this seemed inconsistent with the thing itself, and with all notionswe usually entertain of the subtlety of the devil.
Abundance of such things as these assisted to argue me out of allapprehensions of its being the devil. And I presently concluded that itmust be some more dangerous creature; viz. that it must be some of thesavages of the main land over-against me, who had wandered out to sea intheir canoes, and, either driven by the currents, or by contrary winds,had made the island, and had been on shore, but were gone away again tosea, being as loath, perhaps, to have staid in this desolate island, asI would have been to have had them.
While these reflections were rolling upon my mind, I was very thankfulin my thought, that I was so happy as not to be thereabouts at thattime, or that they did not see my boat, by which they would haveconcluded, that some inhabitants had been in the place, and perhaps havesearched farther for me. Then terrible thoughts racked my imaginationsabout their having found my boat, and that there were people here; andthat if so, I should certainly have them come again in greater numbers,and devour me; that if it should happen so that they should not find me,yet they would find my enclosure, destroy all my corn, carry away allmy flock of tame goats, and I should perish at last for mere want.
Thus my fear banished all my religious hope; all that former confidencein God, which was founded upon such wonderful experience as I had had ofhis goodness, now vanished; as if he that had fed me by miraclehitherto, could not preserve by his power the provision which he hadmade for me by his goodness. I reproached myself with my uneasiness,that I would not sow any more corn one year, than would just serve metill the next season, as if no accident could intervene, to prevent myenjoying the crop that was upon the ground. And this I thought so just areproof, that I resolved for the future to have two or three years cornbeforehand, so that, whatever might come, I might not perish for wantof bread.
How strange a chequer-work of Providence is the life of man! And by whatsecret differing springs are the affections hurried about, as differingcircumstances present! To-day we love what to-morrow we hate; to-day weseek what to-morrow we shun; to-day we desire what to-morrow we fear;nay, even tremble at the apprehensions of. This was exemplified in me atthis time in the most lively manner imaginable; for I, whose onlyaffliction was, that I seemed banished from human society, that I wasalone, circumscribed by the boundless ocean, cut off from mankind, andcondemned to what I call a silent life; that I was as one whom Heaventhought not worthy to be numbered among the living, or to appear amongthe rest of his creatures; that to have seen one of my own species,would have seemed to me a raising me from death to life, and thegreatest blessing that Heaven itself, next to the supreme blessing ofsalvation, could bestow; I say, that I should now tremble at the veryapprehensions of seeing a man, and was ready to sink into the ground, atbut the shadow, or silent appearance of a man's having set his foot onthe island.
Such is the uneven state of human life; and it afforded me a great manycurious speculations afterwards, when I had a little recovered my firstsurprise: I considered that this was the station of life the infinitelywise and good providence of God had determined for me; that as I couldnot foresee what the ends of divine wisdom might be in all this, so Iwas not to dispute his sovereignty, who, as I was his creature, had anundoubted right by creation to govern and dispose of me absolutely as hethought fit; and who, as I was a creature who had offended him, hadlikewise a judicial right to condemn me to what punishment he thoughtfit; and that it was my part to submit to bear his indignation, becauseI had sinned against him.
I then reflected, that God, who was not only righteous, but omnipotent,as he had thought fit thus to punish and afflict me, so he was able todeliver me; that if he did not think fit to do it, it was myunquestioned duty to resign myself absolutely and entirely to his will;and, on the other hand, it was my duty also to hope in him, pray to him,and quietly to attend the dictates and directions of his dailyprovidence.
These thoughts took me up many hours, days, nay, I may say, weeks andmonths; and one particular effect of my cogitations on this occasion Icannot omit; viz. one morning early, lying in my bed, and filled withthoughts about my danger from the appearance of savages, I found itdiscomposed me very much; upon which those words of the Scripture cameinto my thoughts, "Call upon me in the day of trouble, and I willdeliver thee, and thou shalt glorify me."
Upon this, rising cheerfully out of my bed, my heart was not onlycomforted, but I was guided and encouraged to pray earnestly to God fordeliverance. When I had done praying, I took up my Bible, and opening itto read, the first words that presented to me were, "Wait on the Lord,and be of good cheer, and he shall strengthen thy heart: Wait, I say, onthe Lord." It is impossible to express the comfort this gave me; and inreturn, I thankfully laid down the book, and was no more sad, at least,not on that occasion.
In the middle of these cogitations, apprehensions, and reflections, itcame into my thoughts one day, that all this might be a mere chimera ofmy own, and that this foot might be the print of my own foot, when Icame on shore from my boat. This cheered me up a little too, and I beganto persuade myself it was all a delusion; that it was nothing el
se butmy own foot; and why might not I come that way from the boat, as well asI was going that way to the boat? Again, I considered also, that I couldby no means tell for certain where I had trod, and where I had not; andthat if at last this was only the print of my own foot, I had played thepart of those fools, who strive to make stories of spectres andapparitions, and then are themselves frighted at them more than anybody else.
Now I began to take courage, and to peep abroad again; for I had notstirred out of my castle for three days and nights, so that I began tostarve for provision; for I had little or nothing within doors, but somebarley-cakes and water. Then I knew that my goats wanted to be milkedtoo, which usually was my evening diversion; and the poor creatures werein great pain and inconvenience for want of it; and indeed it almostspoiled some of them, and almost dried up their milk.
Heartening myself therefore with the belief, that this was nothing butthe print of one of my own feet (and so
