Irresistible Attraction

by Alison Kelly

  ‘Well, don’t think you’re doing me any favours, because I couldn’t give a damn who knows I’m sleeping with you!’ Alessandra sprang to her feet and scooped the pile of folders from her desk. Roughly she began stuffing them into the filing-cabinet. Her disappointment manifested itself in anger. ‘I’m not ashamed of anything that’s happened between us even if you are!’

  ‘I’m not! But I don’t want it to continue——’

  ‘Swell! That’s all I wanted to know.’ She shoved the last folder into the filing-cabinet and slammed the drawer shut. ‘Square it any way you want to with Lisa and your precious conscience, but don’t make any apologies on my behalf!’

  ‘Alessandra——’

  ‘Save your breath, Bart,’ she told him, striding to the door. ‘After all, wasn’t it one of your country and western heroes who said you have to know when to walk away and know when to run?’

  Bart had left to fetch Lisa by the time Alessandra returned from the bank, for which Alessandra was grateful. She didn’t want to rehash the argument they’d had this morning. Not now.

  It took her nearly two hours to make up the pay packets. At four o’clock Jim came to the house to collect them and distribute them to the hands. Then, since she had no other pressing chores and couldn’t bring herself to think about preparing a meal, she decided to treat herself to a bubble bath.

  Bart and Lisa wouldn’t be back before eight that night and Alessandra welcomed the time alone, relaxing beneath a warm froth of exotically scented bubbles. She closed her eyes and commanded herself to put the revelations of the day behind her and concentrate on her future.

  Her job finished at the end of next week and one thing was clear: she’d definitely have to find somewhere to stay, at least for a few days. The longer she stayed under the same roof as Bart, the crueller she was being to her heart. She’d conceitedly believed that by the time Lisa chose to return Bart would have decided he couldn’t live without her and asked to to stay. She’d never been naïve enough to hold out hopes that he might propose marriage—he’d made it plain he had no desire ever to marry again—but she’d willingly have agreed to stay on as his lover if that was all he offered. Second-best was better than nothing. Yet when push came to shove that was exactly what he’d wanted…nothing.

  She knew she should phone her brother Drew and ask him to let her crash out at his Sydney flat until she got herself another job, but he’d want explanations and right now she wasn’t sure she could supply them without bursting into tears. She’d never before had to ask for financial assistance from her family, but then she’d never been in love before, nor faced circumstances preventing her from working for the time she needed to raise the money herself.

  The house was in darkness as Bart swung the 4 by 4 to a halt and jumped out at almost the same instant. Behind him he could hear Lisa hurrying to catch up with him.

  ‘Dad, don’t blame Alessandra; it wasn’t her fault. She hasn’t done anything wrong!’

  ‘So you keep saying, but I don’t agree,’ he said. He was stunned that his voice could sound so controlled even as rage consumed every other emotion in his body.

  ‘There aren’t any lights on,’ Lisa said. ‘She must be asleep. Wait until morning before you speak with her.’

  ‘Lisa, don’t tell me what to do where Alessandra is concerned,’ he cautioned, reaching to flood the kitchen with light, then turning to look at his daughter. ‘Get your bag out of the car and get to bed.’

  ‘But Dad, I just want to say——’

  ‘You’ve said plenty for one night.’

  ‘Would you pair mind keeping it down to a dull roar? I’m trying to sleep.’

  The interruption of Alessandra’s voice from the top of the stairs grabbed Bart’s attention. He turned and looked up to find her leaning against the banister. She was dressed in a short oversized T-shirt which, as she raised a hand to sleepily ruffle her spiky blonde hair, inched higher, displaying the very top of her thigh. He yearned to view more of what he knew to be the most sensuous body on earth and was momentarily distracted from his anger, but Lisa’s hurried words of warning brought it sharply back into focus.

  ‘Alessandra, I’m sorry. I tried to explain it to him, but——’

  ‘Alessandra, I want a word with you in the office.’ He didn’t wait for a response and marched immediately into the hall. ‘Now!’

  Still half asleep, Alessandra couldn’t imagine what had happened to cause Bart’s fury or Lisa’s wide-eyed concern. Slowly she walked down the stairs.

  ‘Lisa? What’s going on?’ The younger girl caught her lip between her teeth. ‘Listen, Lisa, any sort of clue would be a big help at this stage,’ Alessandra added, hoping to tease at least a smile if not a response from the girl.

  ‘Alessandra, I’m waiting!’ Bart’s words could only be described as an impatiently furious roar.

  Knowing she’d get no more sleep until he’d yelled at her for whatever it was he imagined she’d done, Alessandra turned in the direction of the office. She’d taken only one step when Lisa’s panicked whisper reached her.

  ‘He knows I’ve been taking the Pill and that you went with me to the doctor’s.’

  Only two words came to Alessandra’s mind. Oh, great!

  CHAPTER TEN

  WALKING down the hallway to the office, Alessandra could well imagine how men on their way to the gallows must feel. Taking a deep breath, she pushed open the door and went in.

  ‘You’re really something else, you know that?’

  He shot the words at her with the speed of a competitor in the rapid-fire pistol event at the Olympics, then reloaded and fired again.

  ‘Nothing is sacred to you! You just barge on in and do whatever Alessandra MacKellar thinks is right and damn the consequences! Do you ever stop to think before you do something? Have you ever once considered that perhaps you don’t know everything? That maybe, just maybe, there are some things that are none of your damned business?’

  His questions were delivered in a menacingly subdued voice tinged with exasperation while he paced back and forth in front of the window. When he paused Alessandra knew some response was expected. She didn’t know where to start and it was while she was fumbling for the right words that the wrong ones came out.

  ‘I’m pregnant.’

  If she hadn’t been so horrified by what she’d said she’d have found Bart’s open-mouthed shock laughable. Twice he attempted to speak and couldn’t get the words out. Lifting her chin, she forced herself to take control of the ridiculous silence, which was leading nowhere.

  ‘Your reaction is almost identical to what mine was when the doctor told me today.’ She watched as he moved in silence to sit in the chair behind the desk.

  ‘Are…are you sure? I mean, you said you were on the Pill…’ he stammered, his eyes watching her face.

  ‘I was on the Pill,’ she insisted, her voice angry. ‘I’ve told you before I’m not a liar.’

  ‘I didn’t mean to imply you were,’ he said almost gently. His eyes were hazed by confusion and something else; Alessandra couldn’t be sure what, but suspected it was shock.

  ‘I haven’t decided what I’m going to do yet——’

  ‘What the hell do you mean by that?’ he shouted, jumping to his feet and causing Alessandra to take two steps backwards. ‘You can forget any ideas of an abor——’

  ‘I would never have an abortion! Never! How could you even think——?’

  ‘Sorry.’ He came around the desk towards her with his arms outstretched. ‘I’m sorry, Alessandra, I wasn’t thinking. It’s just that when you said you didn’t know what to do…I know what to do.’ He reached to touch her. ‘For a start we’ll get married.’

  She eluded his grasp, knowing that once they’d been the words she’d dreamed of hearing on his lips. Now even ‘I love you’ wouldn’t be enough. Coming on the heels of her announcement, she would never know if he really meant it.

  ‘No,’ she said.

  ‘No
? No, you won’t marry me?’

  She smiled at his disbelief. He sounded as if she’d just told him she could fly. The poor guy was trying to do the right thing again and couldn’t accept that she wouldn’t fall in with his plans.

  ‘This isn’t funny, Alessandra. I’m deadly serious here.’

  ‘I know,’ she said gently. ‘Look, I never intended to tell you like this. I wanted to sort things out in my head first.’ Looking at the carpet, she tried to compose her hyperactive emotions.

  ‘But you were going to tell me, weren’t you, Alessandra?’ His words suggested he had doubts about this.

  ‘Yes!’ Her head lifted rapidly. ‘I’d never deprive you of the knowledge of your child,’ she replied honestly, suddenly feeling weepy. ‘Nor Lisa of her half-brother or -sister.’ She bit her lip. ‘It seems Lisa is destined to find out about our little…“fling” regardless of your best intentions. I’m sorry, Bart.’

  As her overworked emotions threatened to get the better of her, she made a dive for the door.

  ‘Alessandra…’

  ‘Please, Bart, let’s leave it till morning. I…’

  She raced towards the stairs and could hear the sound of Bart’s feet hurrying after her, his voice calling her. From the kitchen Lisa called to her to wait, but she ignored her.

  ‘Dad! Leave her alone! She crying! What have you done to her?’

  Lisa’s voice carried up the stairs, as did Bart’s response as Lisa blocked his pursuit.

  ‘I’ve gotten her pregnant and the stubborn fool refuses to marry me!’

  The sun was shining and some sadist was trying to knock her door down with their bare hands.

  ‘Alessandra, it’s me, Lisa. Are you awake?’

  ‘I’d have to be dead to sleep through the racket you’re making. Hang on till I unlock the door.’

  Alessandra got up and opened the door to a widesmiling teenager.

  ‘Is it true?’ she asked, closing the door behind her. ‘Am I really getting a kid brother or sister?’ Alessandra nodded and lay back on the bed. ‘Wow, this is so great!’ She watched as the pretty youngster’s face changed and became more serious. ‘But you told Aunt Marilyn and me you were crazy ‘bout my dad, so how come he says you won’t marry him? Especially now.’

  ‘It’s called timing, Lisa,’ Alessandra explained. ‘Your dad only asked me to marry him after I told him about the baby. For it to have meant anything he’d have had to ask me before he knew I was pregnant. You understand?’

  ‘No,’ the girl said, tossing her waist-length plait behind her shoulders and doing her best to give the older woman a superior look. ‘Seems to me you’re being pretty fussy. I mean, if the man I loved asked me to marry him, I’d be thrilled regardless of when it happened,’ Lisa chided, her tone making Alessandra smile.

  ‘You’re suffering from over-exposure to Marilyn. You’re starting to sound like her,’ she said.

  ‘Yeah, well, I bet she’d talk some sense into you.’ Lisa pouted.

  Alessandra dearly wanted to tell Lisa that she wasn’t going to allow Bart to sacrifice himself again as he’d done when he’d discovered that Kathleen was pregnant with Lisa. But she couldn’t. She had no idea how much Lisa knew of the circumstances of her parents’ marriage or even if the girl had bothered to calculate the date of her birth and the wedding. She might still very much believe that her creation was the result of a great love, and if anyone should tell her otherwise it was Bart and no one else. It was Lisa who broke the silence, which was threatening to become awkward.

  ‘I’ve decided to go to college,’ she said.

  ‘Oh? Your dad will be pleased.’

  ‘Yeah, he was.’ She paused. ‘At first.’

  ‘What does that mean?’

  ‘I told him I wanted to go to UCLA and he freaked. He started raving about all the weirdos in California and all the dangers to a young girl living away from home.’ She sent Alessandra an apologetic look. ‘That’s when I told him that I’d be extra careful, and besides, I was already taking precautions.’

  ‘Precautions being the Pill, right?’

  ‘He kinda dragged it out of me. I told him you tried to talk me into telling him and that I knew it wasn’t a hundred percent safe——’

  ‘Ain’t that the truth!’

  ‘But he wouldn’t listen. I think he was madder because you knew about it than he was about me actually taking it.’

  Alessandra was quite sure she was right. Bart’s words last night had centered on her interference rather than Lisa’s use of contraceptives.

  ‘If it makes you feel any better, I haven’t had reason to be glad that I’m taking it yet,’ Lisa admitted with a blush. ‘I decided Todd wasn’t the right guy.’

  Alessandra pulled the girl to her and gave her a hug.

  ‘I promise you the right one will arrive when you least expect it and knock your socks off.’

  ‘Like Dad did to you?’ Lisa prodded knowingly.

  Alessandra sighed and moved away to stand up.

  ‘Yeah, exactly like that.’

  ‘But you don’t love him enough to marry him.’

  ‘Lisa, you don’t understand!’ Alessandra stated. She was frustrated because she couldn’t make her understand and because she felt she had to make her understand. ‘It’s because I love him too much that I won’t marry him.’

  Lisa walked to the door. ‘You’re going to leave, aren’t you?’ Alessandra nodded. ‘When?’

  ‘I’m not sure; I’ll have to call my brother first. Probably at the end of the week.’

  ‘I’ll miss you,’ Lisa said.

  Alessandra’s vision blurred with tears. ‘I’ll miss you too, Lisa,’ she admitted and watched sadly as the door closed.

  * * *

  She blinked as she stepped off the veranda into the fiercely bright sun. Walking across the yard from the house, she prayed the tear-induced headache she had would pass quickly. She hadn’t been game to take anything for it, not knowing what would and what wouldn’t hurt her baby…Bart’s baby.

  She was surprised to find Jim was still in the stable when she went to saddle Pewter.

  ‘Sorry I’m late, Jim. What am I doing today?’ she asked, hoping her eyes weren’t as puffy as they felt.

  ‘Dunno, but it ain’t riding any of these horses,’ Jim told her.

  ‘Excuse me?’ His response startled her. Just yesterday he’d told her she had best prepare herself for a long day in the saddle.

  ‘You heard. Much as I’d do almost anything for you, Alessandra, I’m not about to risk my job by goin’ against the boss’s orders,’ he said, not bothering to look at her.

  ‘What orders?’

  ‘You ain’t to do no riding.’

  ‘Why the devil not?’ Alessandra demanded and forced him to look at her by plucking his hat from his head.

  ‘Durn it all, girl,’ he said, snatching back his hat. ‘Horse-ridin’ ain’t good for pregnant women!’

  Alessandra felt as if she’d been hit with a bucket of iced water.

  ‘Bart told you I was pregnant?’

  ‘Yep.’ The cowboy grinned, replacing his hat firmly on his head. ‘Pleased as punch he is about it. Always figured he was too smart to let a filly as pretty as you get away.’

  ‘I don’t believe this,’ she muttered. What gave him the right to broadcast the fact she was pregnant to all and sundry? ‘Have you any idea where I might find the loud-mouthed Mr Cameron?’

  ‘Sure do.’ Jim chuckled. ‘Said he was heading over to the Shaffers’ place. Guess he wanted to tell them the good news too!’

  Alessandra’s feet barely touched the ground as she ran back to the house and took the steps in one huge leap.

  ‘Should you be doing that in your condition?’ Lisa asked with a frown.

  ‘I’m barely seven weeks, not seven months. What’s Shaffer’s phone number?’ Lisa shrugged in reply and Alessandra shoved the personal phone book into her hands. ‘Find it.’

  ‘Here it is,�
�� Lisa said, reciting the number as Alessandra punched it out on the phone. ‘What’s up? How come you’re so anxious to call——?’

  ‘Hello, Doug? Alessandra here; is Bart there?’

  ‘Gidday, young lady,’ Doug greeted her, then, picked up on the urgency in her voice, said, ‘Bart’s just arrived. I’ll put him on.’

  In the background she could her Doug telling Bart who wanted him, and Bart’s voice was worried when finally he spoke.

  ‘What’s the matter, Alessandra? Are you sick?’

  ‘Sick? I’m a lot healthier than you’ll be when I get my hands on you! What the hell do you think you’re doing, telling Jim I’m pregnant? And that I’m not allowed to ride. The doctor said at this stage I’m perfectly OK to carry on as I have been. I——’

  ‘Well, that’s good news, darling…’

  Darling? He’d never called her that in private, let alone within earshot of Doug Shaffer and, God forbid, possibly Rachel. As the surprise of the endearment started to fade she realised that Bart was talking to whoever was in the room with him at Shaffer’s place. His words drifted through the earpiece to her…

  ‘Alessandra’s pregnant and I told Jim not to let her ride; she’s calling to tell me the doctor said it was fine…’

  ‘Bart! Bart!’ She was shouting into the phone, hoping she was imagining the sound of Doug’s hearty congratulations in the background. ‘Bart!’

  ‘Yes, honey?’

  ‘Honey? I’ll give you honey,’ she spat. ‘What the devil are you trying to do?’

  ‘Why, nothing. Is something wrong? Hang on, Doug wants to say something to you…’

  ‘No! No, I——’

  ‘Alessandra…’ Doug’s warm drawl met her ear. ‘Congratulations. I must say this is wonderful news. Although I don’t know why you don’t want to marry Bart; you’ll not find a better man.’ Alessandra gave a strangled gasp, but Doug appeared not to notice and continued, ‘I guess you modern women feel trapped with total commitment, but if ever you want to talk this over with another woman, well, I know my Rachel will be only too happy to listen.’