He lifts up his head from my neck, and I notice the tears running down his beautiful face. “I’m so proud of you, baby. You…you have no idea how proud you make me. To fight that bastard with teeth and nail the way you did, and to think on your feet like that when you’ve been stabbed multiple times is incredible beyond words. You’re just amazing, baby... I’m so sorry I wasn’t there. I’m sorry I was such an idiot,” he chokes on his last words.
I take a trembling breath, and decide to address the issue that’s been on mind for almost a week now.
“What happened, Aiden? Why were you not there?”
An expression that looks like shame crosses his face. He hangs his head down. When he looks up again after a few seconds, it looks as if he is in physical pain.
“Because I’m stupid. That’s why.” He releases a deep sigh. “Now that this happened, I realize how stupid and insignificant my issue really was.”
“I don’t understand.”
He takes a deep breath. “At the reading of Grandpa’s will, when I found out that he wants me to work at Pierson Investments, something struck me. I realized Grandpa probably organized this whole experience to try to groom me to takeover at the company when this is over... That…that just pissed me off. But it also made me really concerned... I’ve seen how Grandpa lived his life and I’ve seen how these types of people run their companies… I don’t know if I want that kind of lifestyle, Aleah... This latest challenge made me realize that there is a good chance my whole inheritance will be contingent on me taking charge of the company. I kept thinking what would happen if that’s the case. How could I say no to that when he said I’m the only person he trusted enough to continue the family business? Could I disappoint Grandpa? And if I did, would that also disappoint you?” He runs his fingers through his hair and takes a deep breath, before looking away. It takes him a few seconds to bring his eyes back to me and continue.
“Then I started having crazy thoughts like maybe you were in on the whole thing, and I just didn’t want to talk to you... I knew that if I were around you when I was having these thoughts in my head, I might say or do something to hurt you. After what happened in the car the other day, I figured it’s best to stay away until I get my head cleared… But now…now that this happened, I realize how crazy those thoughts were. Being so close to losing you…God…” He covers his face with his hands, before continuing. “I realized that none of these things matter, because at the end of the day as long as it’s you and me and we’re together, I’ll be happy… I shouldn’t have let that get in between us… I shouldn’t let anything get between you and me…I’m so sorry, baby. Please forgive me…” His voice trembles over the last words. He takes me in his arms and buries his head in my hair.
I pull back so I can see his face. “You can’t shut me out over things like this, Aiden. If something bothers you this much, you need to talk to me about it. We’re supposed to communicate when there are issues, not run the other way.”
“You’re right. I need to work on how I react to stressful situations.”
“Yes, you do... What you did hurt me, Aiden. You left me in the dark. I didn’t know what I did to deserve that kind of reaction from you… These wounds,” I say as I point to my bandages. “These wounds will heal in no time, but an ache here,” I put my hand on my chest to point to my heart. “It takes a lot longer for that to heal. You know how fragile my heart is, you can’t trample on it like that and expect me to come right back into your arms.”
“Don’t say that, baby… Please don’t say that.” He says apprehensively.
I take a deep breath and look away from him. The truth is if it was any other day, I probably would have turned Aiden away. But right now, when I’m still so shaky from being attacked, when I almost died, I can’t let grudges or hurt feelings get in between me and the man I know is the love of my life. I can’t deny him forgiveness, when I saw with my own eyes, how fleeting and unpredictable life can be.
I swing my head around to gaze into his pleading eyes. “I don’t really want to think about any of that right now.” I tell him honestly. “Tonight, I just need to be held. Can you hold me please, Aiden?”
His whole face lights up, as he quickly climbs into the small hospital bed with me. “There’s nothing in the world I would want to do more,” he says, before wrapping his arms around me. I rest my head on his chest and let my body relax against him. And finally, after a week from hell, my lungs take some calming breaths. He runs his hands up and down my arms, as he tells me over and over again how much he loves me. His voice soothes my aching heart and his touch relaxes my tense body. When I finally succumb to sleep, it’s to the lullaby of his heart and the rhythm of his dancing fingers on my sore body, and it’s the best sleep I’ve had all week.
When I wake up early in the morning, Aiden’s troubled eyes are the first thing I see. He’s sitting in a chair only a couple of feet away from my bed, staring in my direction. He looks at me like he’s seen a ghost, like I’m not real.
“Why are you not sleeping? Is everything okay?” I ask him.
“I couldn’t sleep. I can’t get the images of you getting attacked by that bastard out of my head.”
I pat the spot next to me on the bed to beckon him to come closer. He complies immediately.
I lean my head against his shoulder. “I’m okay, Aid. I’m here. Things turned out okay.”
He cups my face and kisses my hair over and over again, as if he’s trying to convince himself that this is real.
“I just can’t shake the crippling fear I felt when I saw you on that stretcher out of my system. You…you don’t understand what you mean to me. If something were to happen to you, I don’t think I could live.”
I look up into his emerald eyes and the sincerity in them takes my breath away. I take his lips in mine, and try to convey to him with my touch what my words cannot say. I try to convince him with all I’ve got that I am real, and that I’m not going anywhere.
Aiden doesn’t leave my side for the next twenty-four hours. Even when I joke that he needs to shower and change his clothes, he gets someone to grab him some clothes from his apartment and showers at the hospital. I catch him looking at me like he can’t believe I’m still here, throughout the day, but I don’t question him. I let him have this time to get over the trauma of what happened.
They discharge me from the hospital the day after, with strict instructions to rest and take it easy at home. Aiden helps me get in the car, and asks me a hundred times if I’m okay. His behavior would have been annoying if it wasn’t so cute. He stops by his apartment on the way to my house. When I ask him what he’s doing, he tells me that he needs to grab some clothes so he can stay at my place.
“Aiden–you can’t stay overnight at my place. Have you forgotten the rules?”
He shrugs his shoulders. “I don’t care about the rules.”
“What? You can’t be serious. You can’t just throw away all you’ve gone through for this experiment because you want to spend a night with me.”
“Don’t worry about it, and it’s not just spending one night with you. I’m not leaving your side anytime soon.”
“Aiden,” I say his name in exasperation. He throws his hands up to stop me. “I said don’t worry about it... I talked to Lou, okay? I told him in no uncertain terms that I was staying with you no matter what. When he found out what happened to you, he said he doesn’t blame me. I told him I’m not giving up my apartment and I’m paying for it myself, but there is no way in hell, I’m letting you go back to your penthouse by yourself after what happened. I would take you to my apartment, but I don’t think you would be comfortable in that tiny place with my non-existent furniture. Lou said he understands. He said this would go on my file, but given the circumstances he doesn’t think the reviewing committee would count this against me.”
“But they might, Aiden. What if they do?”
“I don’t care, Aleah. If they’re going to deprive me of my inheritanc
e because I refuse to leave your side after what happened, then I don’t want the damn thing.”
As much as I want to be mad at him for risking his inheritance, I can’t be. His willingness to risk something he’s worked so hard for just to be near me warms my heart and brightens my day.
He takes me home and settles me in front of the TV.
“What do you want for lunch?” he asks me, after he’s sure I’m comfortably settled in.
“It’s only ten in the morning. Why are you asking about lunch?”
“Because I need to buy the ingredients and get to work if you want to have lunch by noon.”
“You’re going to cook for me?” I ask in surprise.
“Maybe,” he says with a twinkle in his eyes.
“Man, I should get attacked more often. I get treated to all sorts of nice things.”
His face turns serious instantly. “Please don’t ever joke about that. That is not a joking matter.”
I’m just about to come back with a smart response, when my phone rings. Seeing my mom’s phone number on the screen makes nerves hit my body in the pit of my stomach. The first thing that comes to my mind is that they’ve heard about the attack and are now mad that I’ve shamed the family once more by dragging our name into drama. I take a trembling breath and reluctantly answer the phone.
“Hello.”
All I hear on the other end is the sound of my mom’s sobs.
“Mom? Are you okay?”
The sound of my voice makes her weep more intensely into the phone.
“What’s going on mom?”
It takes a long time, but she finally calms herself enough to respond.
“I’m…I’m so sorry honey,” she barely gets the words out, before choking up again.
“Mom, you’re scaring me. What’s going on?”
“We…we heard about Imran… Heard that he attacked you and was arrested. What happened, honey? Are you okay?”
“I was just released from the hospital. I’ll be fine.”
“Oh God! What did he do to you? What did the bastard do to you?”
“A lot less damage than the last time. He stabbed me, mom…multiple times, but at least this time, I fought back. I didn’t let him touch me otherwise. He may have injured my body this time, but I didn’t let him hurt my spirit.”
“Oh God, honey! I’m sorry…I’m so, so sorry,” she says, in between bursts of tears. “We should have believed you last time. We should have listened to you… We couldn’t believe he would be that crazy, but now we know.”
Hearing her say that takes me right back to the aftermath of my last attack. The memories bring a tsunami of anger and hurt.
“Yes, mom. You should have. All of you should have stood up for me, and helped me file charges against him, instead of taking his side… But you didn’t. You chose to believe him over your daughter, and Dad decided to punish me by planning an unwanted marriage for me… The only reason you believe me now is because the police are involved and there is strong evidence against him. I bet if it was still his words against mine, you would take his side again.”
“Don’t say that, Aleah. We made a mistake, a terrible mistake, and we’re so sorry about it. Ever since he heard, your dad’s been a mess. He hasn’t said a word to anyone and hasn’t left his room once. ”
I release a deep sigh. “I don’t know what to say to that mom.”
“I don’t expect you to say anything, but can we come see you? Do you have anyone taking care of you?”
“Yes,” I respond a little too fast. “I have a friend who’s helping me. I’m okay. I’ll be fine… But I don’t think I’m ready to see you guys yet.”
She’s disappointed but says that she understands. I get off the phone quickly after that and lean back against the couch. Aiden’s by my side in a flash.
“Are you okay, baby?” he asks, as he places a comforting hand on my arm.
I look up into his eyes and the extent of love and affection I see there calms my pounding heart. A small grin crosses my face. “Yes, as long as you’re here, I’m okay.”
“What was that all about?”
“I guess my family heard about the attack. Apparently, when they hear it from other people, they believe it. Now they’re apologizing for doubting me the last time around.”
“It’s too late,” he says, his voice dripping with anger.
“That’s what I told her.”
He gathers me in his arms, his thumb gently caressing the nape of my neck. He smoothes my hair and kisses my forehead over and over again, until all the tension from the phone call has left my body. Once he’s sure I’ve calmed down, he turns his head so he can see my eyes.
“So, I’m a friend, huh?” he asks.
“What?”
“You told your mom you have a friend who’s taking care of you.”
“Oh, yea. Well, what do you expect me to tell her? That I have a boyfriend?”
“Yes, why not?”
I raise my eyebrow. “Have you told your mom about us yet?”
He looks away quickly without answering my question. And I know he won’t be saying anything else after that.
Aiden spends the next week acting as the perfect nurse for me. He changes my bandages daily, helps me shower and cooks my most favorite meals. He barely leaves my sight during the whole week. When I tell him that he has to go to work, he just shrugs his shoulders and tells me to not waste my energy. He tells me there is no way he’s leaving me until the doctors clear me for regular activities.
Even though after the first few days, I’m strong enough to take care of my own basic needs, I really do need Aiden close by. Because I know how much the attack terrified him, I try to act all tough around Aiden. But the truth is that, as soon as I’m alone, flashbacks from the attack hit me. The sting of the knife and the smell of blood are still as fresh as the moment they happened on my mind. The terror that overtook my body by hearing Imran’s voice still shakes me to my core. I know I will need therapy and a long healing period to be able to get over the trauma of what happened. Now that I think about it, I realize that I was still traumatized over the last attack. I’m not going to fool myself into thinking I can get over this without help, even with Aiden by my side.
Aiden’s presence is a soothing bubble that keeps me feeling safe and secure as long as he’s close by. But as soon as he leaves the house, the force of the trauma that my body endured hits me. Still the week I spend at home with Aiden makes my body and soul recover enough to be able go outside and at least pretend like things are okay. Aiden suggested that I talk to my professors and maybe drop one or two of my classes, but I sternly refused. There is no way in hell I’m letting Imran’s actions put me behind another semester. Now that I’m in charge of my own life, I’m not letting him take away even one day of my life.
So less than ten days after being attacked, I go back to class and Aiden finally goes back to work. Because of my insistence, we made arrangements before going back to work and school for me to move to his apartment. Aiden felt that I would be more comfortable in my penthouse. But since I knew there is no way he would leave me alone there at nights and I didn’t want to jeopardize his chances with the experiment, I convinced him that I should move to his apartment instead.
He emptied half of his small closet for me and made room in the bathroom drawers. He even surprised me with a nice king size bed and a comfortable mattress that replaced the air mattress he’d been sleeping on.
Moving in together seems like a huge step, but since for multiple reasons, our situation is far from stable or predictable, it feels more like a temporary stay. And I decide to enjoy every second of it.
TWENTY-SEVEN
ALEAH
I get flutters of anxiety in my stomach as I pull into the parking garage at the LAX airport. The images of the last time I dropped Aiden off at the airport cloud my mind. I take a deep breath before turning the car off and swirling my head towards Aiden. When I notice him still sitting ti
ght in the car, while clenching his fists, I know this goodbye will be harder than I expected. He turns his pleading emerald eyes to me and the intensity in them makes me more nervous.
“You’re ready?” I manage to ask.
“No, I’m not. I can’t believe you convinced me to go. I’m having second thoughts already. I don’t have a good feeling about this.”
“Aiden, we’ve talked about this. I’ll be fine. I’m going to therapy. I’m doing better, and you’ll be a three hour flight away.”
He takes a deep breath and leans his head back against the headrest. “I don’t want to leave you by yourself here. I know you’re strong enough to deal with anything. But, I just can’t stop worrying… I can’t get the image of you on that stretcher out of my mind. I can’t shake the fear I felt when I saw you that way. Now I have to leave town again for God knows how long.”
“No one will hurt me, Aiden. I’ll be fine. Imran is locked up, and there is no one else that could possibly want to hurt me. Plus, you just made me install a state of the art security system in the house.” I don’t bother reminding him of all the other new security features, since he was the one who insisted on these installations and made sure they were done before he’s leaving. He made the management company install new security cameras in the elevators and the hallways, in addition to adding a panic button in the elevators.
The truth is even though I don’t want him to leave, there is nothing for us to worry about. My wounds have healed well over the last six weeks and my emotional scars, though still fresh, have come a long way. I’ve been attending therapy for the past few weeks and it has helped me tremendously in dealing with the trauma. Aiden has been a crucial help in healing both my body and spirit, but now I’m strong enough to manage a few weeks without him.
When Aiden first learned that his next challenge would be to visit each of the Pierson Foundation’s U.S. offices for a few weeks, he told Lou straight up that he wasn’t leaving me. It took a lot of convincing on my part to get him to agree to go. Although I understand how feels and I appreciate the fact that he’s willing to risk his inheritance to be near me, there is no way in the world I could let him walk away from it after all he’s been through. So now no matter how I feel inside, I have to act strong enough to convince him that he can leave me behind. I grab his hand and squeeze tightly.
Redeeming Love (Resilient Hearts #2) Page 18
