Never Land

by Kailin Gow

  By the time we finished the shoot it was evening, and we were all exhausted and hungry.

  “What do you say we hit up Shoreditch?” Steve suggested. “Apparently it's the cool place to go if you want to get away from all the snobs this side of town. They've got some great bars – and the drinking age is 18! No need for fake Ids.”

  Kyle and Luc enthusiastically agreed, before turning to me and Danny.

  “Guys?” Luc asked, trying hard to be friendly to both of us. I could see how difficult it was for him; his eyes still welled up with ink-dark pain.

  “Actually...” Danny said. “Do you mind if we catch up with you later? I have to talk to Neve about something – is that fine by you, Neve?”

  I nodded and bid farewell to the others. “What is it?”

  “How about we go for a drive?” Danny grinned at me. He led me down into the hotel lobby and out into the street, where a shiny silver Aston Martin awaited us.

  “Your ride?” I asked.

  “All mine,” Danny spun the keys around in his hand and opened the door for me. “You first, love.”

  “So where are we going? A scenic ride through the countryside? A trip to the West End?” I'd eagerly read my London guidebook, and I was set to see as much of the city's tourist sites as possible before we headed home.

  “I'd hoped to take you to one of my favorite restaurants, a Sushi place in South Kensington,” said Danny. “But...my father changed all that.” He visibly tensed at the mention of his father.

  I looked up at him. “What about your father?”

  “I met with him earlier today. And...well....” he stiffened. “Dad wants to meet you. He asked if we'd meet him at his nightclub in Chelsea. Not really our sort of place – too stuck up. But he wants to get to know you.” He rolled his eyes.

  “What's so wrong with that?” I asked.

  “You don't know my father,” he said. “He had a thing for Jessica Botano, quite seriously. When she won Swimsuit Model of the Year he tried to hire her to come out of a birthday cake for his 50th birthday celebrations. I was quite young at the time...”

  I made a face. “You think he'll be...a bit creepy?”

  “He's a 'bit creepy' as you call it with everyone. That's just his natural personality.” Danny grimaced. “Whether it's just that he wants to ogle the famous Botano genes or he wants to embarrass me in public, I don't trust the situation. My father rarely invites me – or a significant other – to anything but a business function without some ulterior motive. And the last thing I want is for you to get mixed up in all of that. And of course, I'll have to see my father's latest child-bride. Veronica Taylor. The former reality star. Have you heard of her?”

  “I've seen her ads.” She was the current face of Dior perfumes – an ethereally gorgeous, pallid young woman. “Isn't she like thirteen?”

  “Twenty-one,” said Danny. “They've already been married six months...she's the youngest one yet.”

  “Careful,” I said, trying to lighten the mood. “They're getting younger and younger. The next one won't be out of high school yet.”

  “She's five years younger than me,” said Danny. “Which is thoroughly strange.” He sighed. “Well, Roni is lively, certainly. I suppose she keeps my daddy dearest young.”

  I looked over at Danny again. His face was still, stony. Almost expressionless.

  We turned on to King's Road and headed towards the river, where some elegant lights greeted us to BLUE WATER, the waterside branch of Danny's father's London empire. Barges were laid out on the Thames, and people in haute couture and sumptuous coats were standing or sitting and drinking next to pulsing heat lamps.

  “Ready to meet the dragon?” Danny turned to me.

  I gulped. “Ready,” I said.

  Chapter 7

  No sooner had we walked in than I began to feel as if I were under a microscope. Everyone stopped and turned to stare at us; voices hushed as we approached, and I felt everyone in the bar stop in order to size me up, looking me up and down, judging my wardrobe. I was wearing a black sequined dress with square shoulders that gave me a powerful silhouette – one of my mother's favorite pieces she'd had re-tailored to fit me – but I still felt under-dressed compared to these people. Most of them were staring at Danny – he was easily recognizable, after all, as the sometime owner of this place, but their look wasn't just about respect for the most important person in the room. The women, especially, were looking at him with unbridled desire in their eyes. I flushed. I was with the man widely regarded as the most desirable in London. Back home in LA, I was treated like a catch, an eligible bachelorette. But here, I knew what the others were thinking. Is she good enough for him? Does she measure up? I wanted to vanish into the middle of the floor.

  But Danny refused to be daunted. He took my hand and squeezed it, hard, showing all the world that we were there together before he kissed my palm. “They're just wondering what a lout like me is doing with a gorgeous thing like you,” he whispered. “They know me here – same as your clubs in LA. It's a small world, and people here get nervous when they have to look at something unfamiliar. You're fresh meat. But don't you worry...”

  “Fresh meat?” I smiled grimly. “Is that what I am?”

  He laughed. “As utterly gorgeous as you are, to these people you're easy prey. Just ignore them.”

  “The VIP section, Mr. Blue,” one of the maître d's almost bowed as he directed us to a private waterside dock covered by a white canopy. Inside, people were reclining on pillows at long tables stocked with every brand of champagne imaginable. As we made our way to the dock, we were intercepted by a tall woman in a perfectly-tailored black dress, her auburn hair swept up in an Audrey Hepburn updo.

  “Can it be?” her accent had only the tiniest trace of a Scottish lilt. “Is Danny Blue back in town?” She kissed him immediately on both cheeks, lingering – I noted – just a few moments too long when she embraced him. She assessed me in a matter of seconds, her shrewd eyes taking in my height, attractiveness, and fashion sense, before apparently deciding I wasn't even worth bothering about and turning to Danny. “How have you been? What have you been up to, darling? It's been positively ages!”

  “Joanne,” Danny smiled through gritted teeth. “Always a pleasure. I've been in California.”

  “Oh yes, working on that little degree of yours – so charming!”

  “And I don't believe you've met Neve Knight. Lead singer of the band I played with out there. The Never Knights. We're touring over here now.”

  “Oh yes, the Never Knights...” Joanne's voice dripped with disdain. “That teen band from America. I think my little sister has one of their songs on her iPod.”

  I wished for the floor to open and swallow me up. Danny, however, refused to take the bait. “Just signed with RRR.” Danny said proudly.

  “Well,” Joanne said, looking utterly disingenuous. “So good that you've moved on, darling.” She gave me a look full of contempt. “After that horrible business with Peyton. Oh, you know, I really do miss her quite dreadfully sometimes. She was so beautiful – inside and out – we all loved her so much.” She squeezed Danny's hand. “We often think of her and you.” She turned to me. “I never encountered a happier couple than those two, really. So utterly in love. We all absolutely mourn that terrible tragedy that took her from us.” She looked over our shoulders. “Oh, my, is that Claire and Louis back from the Riviera? I simply must hear about their cruise!” She squeezed Danny's hand. “I know you must still be mourning. You have my number – do ring me if you ever need to...grieve.” She turned to me. “Good luck with that little band of yours, er – Ever?”

  “Never.”

  “Yes, of course.” She looked down her nose at me as she glided off.

  When she was gone I breathed a sigh of relief. “What was that?” I asked Danny.

  Danny put his arm around me. “That was someone you shouldn't let bother you. The Honorable Joanne Waldegrave. Minor aristocracy. And Peyton's best fri
end – of a sort. Didn't stop her trying to seduce me repeatedly while Peyton was alive. She and Peyton were at the same college back in Oxford. Didn't pay a whit of attention to Peyton when she was just a middle-class girl from the North, but the second her band made it big it was Peyton darling this and Peyton honey that...” He scowled. “She turned up at my place only a few days after Peyton died, seeking to “comfort me.” It didn't work. Couldn't even respect her so-called friend's memory that long...” He wrapped an arm around my waist, pulling me close.

  “She made me feel so small.”

  “Please don't listen to her,” he said. “Don't let a horrid jealous woman like that annoy you. Some people are just insensitive, and Joanne has the sensitivity of a rock.” He sighed. “After this, my father should be a breeze.”

  The second my eyes fell upon Clarence Blue, I knew exactly what he was. Looking just like an older version of his son, Clarence looked closer to Danny's age than to his sixty-something years. I could still see the muscles rippling beneath his exquisitely tailored blue shirt. Handsome, cocky, charming, and magnetic, Clarence had whatever mysterious it it was that made Danny so utterly irresistible. But while Danny's blue eyes had a certain softness, a certain still sad haunting beauty, Clarence's eyes were hard and cold. Painfully aware of their own power. Next to him sat a waif-like blonde barely out of her teens – Roni Taylor. Even without makeup, Roni was one of the most beautiful women I'd seen, easily four inches taller than me and probably still weighing at least ten pounds less. She picked sadly at a pile of lettuce arranged florally in the middle of her plate, her eyes only lighting up when she saw Danny approach. She was wearing an off-the-shoulder peach dress that highlighted her bony shoulders. I was intimidated by her and felt sorry for her at the same time. She was beautiful, terrifyingly so, but almost bird-like – like a bird, I thought, trapped in a cage. Eating forkfuls of plain lettuce.

  “So, this is the girl you haven't shut up about!” Clarence's broad Yorkshire accent was a far cry from Danny's clipped tones, but the deep bass timbre in the voice was the same. “Let's have a look at her, shall we? Are you the girl that's been vexing our Danny?” He looked me over, his bright blue eyes watering slightly as he took in every inch of my flesh with an interest that seemed decidedly more than paternal. I shivered slightly as he took hold of my hand and kissed it with mock obeisance. “Danny's been spending a fair bit of time out in California – is that your doing, my girl?”

  “Father...” Danny said in warning tones, looking thoroughly uncomfortable at the proceedings. “Neve's new here – let's make her feel welcome.”

  “Charmed,” said Roni Taylor in a hollow voice, automatically stretching her hand out to me. She looked like a doll, I thought, every action, every gesture meticulously rehearsed. She was evidently as nervous as I was, trying to make a good impression. My pity for her increased. A girl of twenty-one married to a man three times her age, trying to fit in among the snobs and dandies of the Blue Water nightclub, among women like Joanne who would likely treat her with the same withering disdain. What was she doing with herself? Did she find any friends in a place like this – or only enemies?

  “Roni, so good to see you.” Danny's voice was curt, almost wary. I looked up in surprise at his tone of voice. Danny was normally so friendly; why did he sound so awkward around her?

  Roni's blue eyes narrowed on Danny's face, and her expression said it all. The look of boredom and misery faded; in that moment her eyes lit up and sparkled. I saw a glimpse of the beautiful, happy young girl that I'd seen on the cover of so many magazines. “Danny!” she said. “I've missed you so!” She pulled him to her in a hug, a hug that he nervously tried to get out of reciprocating.

  My stomach plummeted as I realized the truth. The real reason Danny was so nervous about me meeting his family. Roni's look wasn't the look of lust or desire I'd learned to get used to on the faces of so many groupies. Roni Taylor was quite obviously head over heels in love with her stepson.

  Chapter 8

  Clarence Blue looked me up and down, his limpid blue eyes fixating on me. I shivered slightly as I felt him take it all in – the size of my hips, the curve of my waist, the precise shape of my breasts. Clarence Blue was, I knew, more than just a womanizer – he was the ultimate playboy, every girl's dream. Or at least – he had been, and his bank account balance more than made up for the difference between his looks now and the looks he sported back in the day. I was thoroughly unnerved by the way that Clarence patted my shoulder, hugging me tightly enough to feel my bra strap under the dress; the way he looked me in the eye, searchingly, as if to imply that he knew exactly what Danny and I were doing every night. It was Danny's turn to be embarrassed. At his father's actions, he flushed a vague shade of crimson, looking down and trying to avoid my gaze. Poor Danny, I thought as Clarence Blue's eyes seemed to close in around me, it's one thing having a dad who used to be a famous womanizer in the past. But Clarence apparently wasn't above hitting on his son's girlfriends in the present. Perhaps it made him feel young again; certainly, the cheeky flirtatious grin he shot me wouldn't have looked out of place on a boy of sixteen.

  “Well, you certainly can't say she doesn't have Jessica Botano's looks,” Clarence said with a smirk. “She's stunning, Danny. Well done.” The way he turned to Danny, completely ignoring me or any say I might have in the matter, hit me to the core. I flushed red with embarrassment against myself.

  “Thank you,” I said stiffly. I couldn't risk being impolite now – as nervous as I felt, I knew the last thing I wanted to do was isolate Danny's parents. However unconventional this was, this was definitely a “meet the parents” moment. A chance to impress Danny, to show him that I was long-term girlfriend material. Just like Peyton was. Peyton... I caught a glimpse of Joanne on the barge, laughing and flirting. Was what she said about Danny true? Had he already had it – that one great love that makes all others seem meaningless by comparison? I swallowed hard and tried to ignore the sinking feeling in the pit of my stomach. Could I only be second best for Danny?

  “She may be Jessica Botano's daughter,” Danny shot out, taking my hand, “but her beauty is all her own. Neve's one of a kind, Dad.” His voice took on a strange, child-like urgency. He wasn't just complimenting me, I noted – he was trying to convince his dad, to gain some measure of approval from the father who barely seemed to notice that Danny existed. “And don't forget her talent. I mean, really, Dad, Neve's one of the best song-writers I've ever worked with. You must have heard it on the radio – our first single. It's selling rather well, actually.”

  “Yes, yes, I must have done,” Clarence said airily, in a voice that made it clear he'd probably never bothered to do it. “Roni tells me what to listen to – don't you, Roni? She's in charge of my social media.” He guffawed.

  Roni leaned across the table, reaching out to lightly touch Danny's hand. Her eyes were blue and enormous, full of emotion. “It's really a very good song,” she said. “I always like to keep track of whatever Danny's involved in. If he decides what he really wants to do is form a band, then I support him every step of the way.” She smiled at him, but her maternal words felt strange – even unsettling – coming from her lips. The way that Roni – clearly a couple of years younger than Danny – was affecting this parental role even as her eyes nakedly told the story of her longing for him bordered on the surreal. I felt thoroughly uncomfortable, although from the looks of it not nearly as uncomfortable as Danny. No sooner had she reached out to touch his hand than he visibly stiffened, shooting me an almost apologetic look. Against myself, I felt an instinctive stirring of jealousy. Was Danny genuinely uncomfortable with the way Roni Taylor – a woman so beautiful it made you want to stop whatever you were doing to paint a sculpture of her – looked at him, or was he just embarrassed about revealing her feelings for him in front of me or his father? I couldn't imagine any guy turning down a girl that looked like Roni, and my heart sank slowly. This whole family was decidedly more eccentric than my own.


  “Yes, yes, well, well – we've all got our wild oats to sow, eh?” Clarence winked and nudged Danny in the ribs, looking at me with a decidedly emphatic stare. “But eventually we learn to grow up and do the right thing, isn't that right, Danny? I'm hoping once Danny finally gets this degree business out of the way we'll see some proper use out of him at Blue Enterprises.”

  “Dad...” Danny's voice was filled with warning. His father's words had evidently cut him to the core. Never before had I seen Danny look so small, so vulnerable. He looked almost like a schoolboy being chastised by a schoolmaster. So very young. So hurt. His father evidently had more than his fair share of power over him. No wonder Danny had been so reticent to let us meet – to let me see him in this vulnerable state.

  “Oh, for goodness' sake, Danny – do be an adult. Fiddling around with footnotes. Strumming a few chords on a guitar? When I was your age I'd already earned the money to buy a derelict old building in Islington that later became the first Blue Grand by whatever means necessary. I shone shoes. I sold newspapers...”

  “Of course,” Danny muttered, “the whole rags-to-riches narrative only comes out when it suits you.”

  “You've got a role to play as the President of Blues Enterprises. I gave you that title a year ago and you've done nothing with it but have a shiny nameplate on an unused office...”

  Blues Enterprises? I looked up in confusion. Danny had told me that he was minimally involved in his father's business. Being named as President of Blues Enterprises was more than just an honorary title. It meant that Danny had control of millions of dollars of company funds – whole bales of cash at his fingertips. Why had he never told me that? Danny was looking down shamefacedly.

  “Had I realized this evening was going to be an ambush...” he was saying quietly.