Tempted At The Office: A Dirty Office Romance (Working Desires Book 1)

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Tempted At The Office: A Dirty Office Romance (Working Desires Book 1) Page 11

by Keys, Hazel


  “So you’re really getting married, huh?” Jake asked, flipping on the TV and leaving it on a football game, Dallas versus Miami. “I got to be honest. I never pictured you as the marrying type.”

  “Really? Why? You were always the perennial bachelor, not me.”

  “Yeah well…Crystal, like okay…Crystal is great and all, don’t get me wrong. Don’t misunderstand this. She’s like really hot, actually. Totally out of your league.”

  “I know,” I said with a smile. “She’s amazingly beautiful.”

  “But I always pictured you with someone more…intellectual, I guess.”

  “Owch…owch!”

  “Yeah, that came out wrong. I take it back.”

  “Damn, Crystal would kick your ass if she heard that.”

  “I know, I know, I didn’t mean it that way. I meant more like…”

  “I mean, Crystal went to college. The cheerleading thing is temporary, you know. She’s studying physics, she studies mathematics in her spare time…”

  “I’m sorry, that’s not what I meant.”

  “Well, it sounds like you were saying…”

  “Look here’s what I MEANT. Okay, I’m just going to say it because what I said sounds so much worse. I meant, I always figured you’d marry someone…like Amelia.”

  “What?”

  “Well yeah, you know, a girl down to earth. Someone…down there on your physical level…boy, I better stop talking. I keep making it sound much worse.”

  I laughed. “I don’t care, I’m just curious…why Amelia?” My heart was racing at the thought. No matter how I tried to grow up and put silly schoolgirl crushes out of my head, I always felt that flutter in my stomach when Amelia’s name came up. I felt the instinct to deny everything.

  “I don’t know. The way you talked about her. The gleam in your eye. I figured you wanted someone to be friends with. Not some movie star or cheerleader…I mean any guy can get that. Girls that are all about looks are easy. That’s all I’m saying. I know, I’m making it sound much worse. Let’s just watch the game, shall we?”

  Jake’s comment, while off the cuff, struck me as profound. I always imagined Crystal as the top of the mountain, someone that a guy like me had to try really hard to win. She was the cheerleader, physically perfect beauty that only rich and powerful men could get. The rest of my life would be devoted to keeping her satisfied, the goddess, thegreat beauty among all other women. So when Jake implied that she was beneath me somehow, it took me a while to get my head around the idea.

  “Well…” I said cautiously. “We don’t really fall in love with our friends.” By now I was lying. I felt guilty about my amorous feelings for Amelia and now wanted to hide them at all costs. It was like I was back in school again and blushing because of someone’s taunting me, “David and Amelia sitting on a tree…”

  But Jake wasn’t taunting me…he was just stating an observation. I couldn’t really take offense to someone speaking the uncomfortable truth.

  “No, most guys don’t fall in love with their friends,” Jake said. “But you, I kinda figured you would. You seemed like the kind of guy who would marry his high school sweetheart. Now see, someone like me? I don’t want to marry my best friend. It’s too weird for me. But you, David, you’re a weird guy.”

  I laughed. “All right Jake, that’s enough pep talk for a while.”

  “No seriously, here’s what you do.”

  “Do what about what?”

  “Just hear me out. Okay, my gut tells me that you still have feelings for Amelia.”

  I took a gulp and shook my head. I was definitely not fooling Jake.

  “So here’s what you do. Go sleep with Amelia and then decide if you still like Crystal or if there’s some much greener grass waiting for you on the other side.”

  “What? That’s terrible advice! I’m not going to have a one night stand with Amelia and risk losing our friendship.”

  “Hmmm,” Jake said with a grin. “Interesting that your first instinct was to avoid hurting Amelia and not Crystal.”

  “Well, both.”

  “Right but you thought of one before the other.”

  I opened my mouth, losing my thought in mid-sentence.

  Damn he was right. I fought off my blush, which gave me away and made up some bullshit excuse about how that wasn’t true. But damn it, it was true.

  Even if I wasn’t going to cheat, my mind was still putting more value on Amelia’s friendship than Crystal’s heart. What could that mean?

  Was it possible that I loved Amelia more than Crystal? Or was Amelia just more important to me than my future wife? This didn’t feel right, any of it. I had to fix this. I had to do the right thing.

  And the right thing was, is, and has always been…

  Get over Amelia and marry the girl who loves you.

  Chapter 4: Amelia

  “Amelia, dear, hand me that box,” mother said to me, pointing out the Earl Grey tea inside the cupboard.

  She always enjoys it in the afternoon, decaffeinated of course, since she doesn’t like to get riled up at night. Now in her fifties, she still moves with the same spunk that she had thirty years ago. The difference now is that she talks like a woman who is content with life…not expecting anything, or wishing for anything that can’t come true. Her voice is graceful, a little overbearing, as always, and always with a sophisticated way of speaking. I can only wonder if I’ll sound the same in another twenty years—having loved, lost and found redemption in this crazy game called life.

  “Thank you,” she said, taking a few bags out and creating the perfect cup of tea. Always dark and bitter, no sugar or cream, just like life! Mother always was austere, even when she was younger.

  I went over to her house to help her move some furniture and we decided to make some tea. While chilling out on the couch, she carefully ventured into the territory that mothers always love to encroach upon.

  “How’s work? Are you still doing the jewelry making?”

  “Ring-designing. I’m trying. I have a few orders already. Getting some new ideas for winter.”

  “Well, you can’t live on your father’s inheritance forever. It’s time to start thinking about the future.”

  “I make more money at ring-making than you think mother,” I remind her with a squint of my eyes. She can’t help but be a little patronizing, even if every word comes out battered in love.

  “And are you still single?”

  I sighed. “Yes mother, I haven’t jumped into another bad romance, if that’s what you’re implying. I thought you’d be relieved.”

  “Well, of course I’m not relieved. Taking time to yourself can quickly become a lifetime of loneliness. Forgive me for looking out for the future.”

  “Nobody knows the future…we live day by day. That’s what I’m doing now.”

  Mother sighed. “Amelia, I will not have you become a spinster. You’re still in the prime of your life. Haven’t you heard that thirty is the new twenty?”

  “Everybody says that, mother!” I replied, holding my head in frustration. “Actually, I think it’s forty is the new fifty, or fifty is the new sixty.”

  “Well, when you’re forty it IS too late.”

  I laughed but mother just stared at me, totally without irony. “I’m merely trying to remind you to keep your options open. Have you had any interest from the boys?”

  “No, not really,” I finally confessed.

  “Who’s the ‘Not Really’?”

  “It’s just an expression.”

  “No, Not Really means there’s something and I want to know who he is.”

  “He’s nobody. Say, did I tell you that I got David to come help us this weekend, with the shrubs and branches?”

  “That will be fine,” she replied, but not before a long and thinking silence. “It’s not David, is it?”

  “What?” I laughed heartily. “No, mother, he’s already engaged to be married.”

  “Hmmm,” she said with a f
rumpy look. “He always liked you, you know.”

  “And I liked him.”

  “I’m not talking about that way. I mean he liked you. He fancied you.”

  “No? What? David?” I shook my head and giggled, a bit nervously, since this was a very taboo conversation, given mother’s views on cheating.

  “Well sometimes a woman can tell. Didn’t you ever notice how often he sought out our company?”

  “Well, no, not really. I mean…I don’t know. All I know is, he’s engaged. Maybe a long time ago, there could have been something…but nothing ever became of it, so there’s no point in discussing the past. I treasure our friendship.”

  “Well then. Good. Now get to meeting some suitors. I want grandchildren before I die.”

  “You’re so subtle, mother,” I said with a smirk. “Very indirect, but I think I understand what you’re saying.”

  “There’s nothing direct or indirect about it. Women in their forties have a higher risk of having deformed children.”

  “Mother that is not true!” I said with a shake of my head. “Anyway…if all I can find out there is a man less than David, then it’s not really worth looking, now is it?”

  “You speak of David as if he’s a paragon of manhood.”

  I smiled and she definitely noticed. “I’m not in love with him, I’m just saying, I wouldn’t settle for anything less than him. I want something better than him.”

  “Well I always thought highly of David,” mother said proudly. “I always thought you two might grow to like each other.”

  “Well we did and we do.”

  Mother began the “stare”, an eyes forward, peering into my soul sort of look that always provokes discussion. She was dueling me, wanting to know if I was holding anything back.

  “I love David,” I said, correcting myself. “But we haven’t known each other as…you know, that. Even if I did want that…”

  I looked at her but her expression never changed.

  “I couldn’t do that to Crystal. It’s cruel. Isn’t it?”

  “I don’t think anyone could tell you what to do, it’s your decision. And one that you will have to live with, whether you tell him or not.”

  “What does that mean, mother? I’m trying to decipher your hidden message here.”

  “He’s not married yet. This is your last chance before he is married. And if a man is married, he will never fully give his attention to you.”

  “I know, I’m not a home wrecker.”

  “Let me tell you one thing,” mother said strongly.

  “Oh boy, here we go.”

  “Sometimes the best men you can find are not aggressive and don’t just want to charm you and take you to bed.”

  I looked at her in confusion. “Say what? I think I need more of the ‘I want grandchildren’ bluntness to figure out all your code talk, mother.”

  “There’s no code talk, big meanie,” she retorted. “I’m saying maybe David is shy and doesn’t just want to come right out and say that he’s interested in you.”

  Finally I laughed hard. That’s a big laugh, especially if you know David like I’ve always known David. “That’s where you’re wrong, mother,” I said politely. “David has never had a problem asking girls out or ‘paying attention to pretty girls.’ So he’s just not into it. And frankly, neither am I. The last thing a woman wants to feel is that she has to badger a man into dating her.”

  “Well it worked with your father,” she snapped back. “I badgered him good and he came around.”

  I laughed so hard I almost spilled my tea.

  Chapter 5:David

  There is something holy about gardening. I don’t really know what I believe about the universe, but there is something very spiritual about growing life from the earth. It’s an activity that rejuvenates the soul and strips away the triviality of our finances, our worst fears, and even our out-of-reach dreams. This is life, this is really as good as it gets. Growing food, creating flowerbeds, and watching trees bear fruit before your very eyes—it’s magical.

  I understand instantly why Naomi, Amelia’s mother, and Amelia herself have taken to their gardening. It may not be a career but it’s a nourishing hobby, maybe even therapeutic.

  Of course, I was the one they asked to help clean up the yard. Naomi is getting older and struggles with medical problems, so she can’t do a lot of physical labor, like chopping down crooked trees, mowing out of control and taking shrubbery and dumping it down into the forest pit.

  Amelia…well, Amelia is still young and active. Why didn’t she take care of it? And why did she specifically request that I come over instead of a gardener or lawn care specialist?

  Maybe it was selfish of me, or egocentric, but I couldn’t help but wonder if she felt the same way deep down, the way I felt about her. She’s the one who never seemed to think of me as a romantic kind of guy. Maybe something changed. Maybe she changed or I changed, and one chemical incompatibility was corrected.

  Oh but wouldn’t it be embarrassing if I was the only one that felt this way? Oh Jesus, and right in front of her mother!

  This was going to be a very difficult “flirty” conversation. I had to imply things to Amelia without coming outright and saying them. If I knew anything about Naomi, her mother, is that she was very keen on manners and politeness. To be crude about dating Amelia now would be an unforgivable trespass.

  I smiled, exhausted after a long haul outside in the massive back yard. I was also freshly showered, as they insisted “their home was my home…” Oh if only!

  I sat on the couch and faced Naomi and Amelia, who did seem a little on edge.

  “Well like I said, it’s been so nice seeing you again. It kind of sucks that we don’t hang out like we used to.”

  “Oh yes, even when you were children you were both very good friends. And that friendship has persisted to this day!” Naomi said, always eloquent as was her style.

  “Yup. It’s a shame so many people lose touch nowadays. I mean, we live in a generation that values social media, email…we’re losing the physical connection.”

  “Yes, we are!” Naomi replied.

  “Yep,” Amelia said, keeping conspicuously quiet.

  “You know, I still remember…Amelia…”

  I said her name and neglected to say Naomi…I felt a chill go down my spine. I was making the implication. It felt right. It felt bold and a little exhilarating. Especially considering how many times I neglected to ever speak of Amelia like an attractive woman and not just a friend.

  “The times we spent in Galveston. Sitting on the beach. Riding on the ferry.”

  “Of course we remember those times,” Amelia said with a friendly smile, kind of smacking down my implication. “We all had so much fun. It was a home away from home.”

  True, Naomi was always with me and a few other mutual friends. It’s easy to see how she could have misconstrued that as innocent and wholesome friendship.

  I sighed, almost backing down.

  I should just let it be.I’ve already chosen. I chose Crystal. The timing is wrong. She’s single but I’m not. Maybe it’s just time to let this thing die once and for all.

  I paused and smiled, spacing out and feeling each second passing by as if it were a full minute.

  “You know all I really remember about those vacations is you.”

  “Awww, well we remember you too-”

  “No, YOU, YOU.”

  I blurted it out. Like I feared, time stopped in that moment and all I heard was the sound of my own voice ranting.

  “I didn’t really notice a lot of the scenery or how much fun I was supposed to be having because I was staring at you most of the time.”

  Amelia and Naomi stared at each other, definitely getting the vibe.

  “I kept thinking to myself, as beautiful as the beach is…all I’m ever going to remember about this moment is staring into Amelia’s eyes. Chatting about silly little things that seemed like nothing back then…but which now
I realize were about everything. And wishing that this moment never had to end. That it could go on and on forever.”

  Amelia chuckled to herself. That wasn’t a good sign.

  “Well…we were both young, weren’t we?”

  She smiled as she looked into my eyes but her shields were up. Poor Naomi had no idea what to say, and looked back and forth at us, probably annoyed that neither of us were communicating what we really felt.

  “Well, we never appreciate our youth until it’s gone,” I said with a grin. I tried to laugh off the weird moment we had—that realization that I had been in love for a long time.

  Maybe Amelia knew, or maybe she just found out. One thing seemed for sure: there was nothing that could be done about it, or at least that’s what she implied with those stoic and distant eyes.

  I made a few more jokes and talked about a few other mutual friends whom we haven’t seen in a while. I can’t even remember what I said. Mostly, I was breaking inside and trying to stay calm. Truth is, it felt exhilarating to just confess what I was really feeling.

  Maybe the dreaded conversation didn’t matter, maybe we had all outgrown it. Or maybe I screwed up the big dramatic conclusion, I don’t know.

  But after that day, I resigned myself from every entertaining the thought again.

  So what. So Amelia finally knew that I was in love with her. That was ten or twenty years ago. Things change. We’re mature now. We outgrew the past.

  Now it’s all about living like an adult, and all god damn happily ever after.

  Chapter 6:Amelia

  Mother never said much about David’s very scandalous and inappropriate confession. I suppose there wasn’t much to say. It seemed almost arbitrary and rude. And I’m not even talking about the “being in love with me” thing, which he very clearly indicated. That’s a whole other story I don’t care to think about.

  I mean the idea that he would make such a statement while still engaged to another woman. How would such a confession affect Crystal? Crystal, whom he already agreed to marry?

  It was very rude to say it, especially in front of mother.

 

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