by Lilly Atlas
The story had to be much more detailed than that, but she wasn’t sure she could handle more than he’d given her. It read right out of a Hollywood script. There was one question she had to ask though she wasn’t sure she could get the words out without being sick. “Did you—” She cleared her throat. “Did you, um, to her, the one you kidnapped, did you…”
He frowned and shook his head. “No.” The answer was forceful, sure. “Even in the height of my bloodlust and power high, that’s something I wouldn’t abide by. There’s so much ready and willing pussy in the clubs, I wouldn’t and didn’t tolerate someone taking one that was unwilling. Consequences were beyond severe if I ever got word someone crossed that line. But there were some who didn’t agree with me on that. Don’t know how it is now that I’m gone.”
A breath she hadn’t been aware she’d been holding escaped her lungs in a rush. At least that was something. If she’d heard he’d raped this girl, or someone else, she’d be out the door, consequences be damned. There were just some things that couldn’t be forgiven.
“I’ve done some shit in the name of the club. Never had a problem with that. Fucked up as it may be, it was for my club family and I don’t regret it. I do regret the final few months. I regret involving an innocent. I regret my treatment of her. I regret the whole fuckin thing.”
Call her a million types of fool, but she believed him. But did she trust her own judgment in believing him or was she still clinging to the deep feelings she’d developed for him?
The amount of life-altering information that had been pumped into her over the past few hours combined with the rollercoaster of emotions that accompanied that information left her exhausted both mentally and physically. She was all over the map, experiencing everything from anger and hatred, to fear and possible acceptance. It was time for a break; she was overloaded.
“So, what do we do now?” she asked.
Amanda’s use of the word we gave Snake a sliver of hope that what they had was salvageable. Combined with the fact that she hadn’t stormed out the door, slapped his face, or ripped him a new one with her words, and maybe he still had a chance.
Dark circles marred the smooth skin beneath her bloodshot eyes. Her shoulders drooped and she swayed with fatigue. His woman was done for the day. And he wasn’t too far behind.
“Now, we sleep.” He scrubbed a hand down his face. Just having the word sleep pass his lips seemed to bring on a torrent of fatigue. “Then I come up with a plan to get out from under this.” Aware that he had no right to touch her, but unable to stop himself, he cupped her cheek.
For a split second, he’d have sworn she leaned into his touch, but before he had time to be sure, she’d pulled her head back.
“I will not let this touch you, Amanda. Not any more than it already has. I promise I’ll keep you safe.”
She nodded at him, her lips pressed in a firm line.
“Do you want to shower or just sleep?”
“Sleep,” she said, already crawling under the covers. She wormed her way to the far spot in the bed, against the wall and faced away from him.
A hollow feeling settled in the center of his chest. She’d barely reacted to his story. What the hell was going through her mind?
He eased in behind her and pulled the covers up over them. The foot of distance between them might as well have been a mile. As a precaution, he’d pulled the curtains the moment they entered the room, shrouding the room in a blanket of darkness. A few moments of silence passed, but Amanda’s breathing never changed. Didn’t fall into the even pattern of sleep he’d grown accustomed to.
“Nick?” she whispered, breaking through the tense quiet.
“Yeah, baby?”
“Are we really safe here?” The question held a hint of a tremor. “I’m a little scared.” That last part was spoken so low, he almost missed it.
“Yes, Amanda. You’re safe here. You’re safe with me.” He could no longer hold back from touching her and slid a hand over her hip. She still wore her clothes, leggings and a long-sleeved shirt, but he knew what lay underneath so it was good enough.
She reached back and captured his wrist, stilling the motion. Then, in a move that surprised him, she pulled his arm across her waist. He tugged her flush against his torso, closing the gap between them and spooned his big body around her much smaller one. Seconds later, the even rise and fall of her back against his chest alerted him she’d fallen into a much-needed sleep.
It didn’t take him long to follow, leaving the worries and stress on hold until the morning.
Chapter Twenty-Seven
Snake shot to a sitting position, awake in an instant. His hand automatically reached under his pillow where he’d stashed his gun. Something, some sound, had woken him. And there it was again. A small whimper. The previous day’s events rushed back to him and he stiffened. The whimper came from Amanda.
His racing heart calmed as he realized she wasn’t in any danger, only dreaming. He exhaled and tucked her closer. She was safe. He should have expected she wouldn’t have a peaceful sleep. Her dreams were probably haunted by visions of him terrorizing innocent women.
He tightened his hold on her then buried his nose in the crook of her neck. She smelled sweet and familiar. There was a good chance she’d tell him to fuck off if she woke, but he had to try to comfort her. At least that was what he told himself as he slid his hand up her shirt and cupped a breast while his lips met the delicate skin of her neck. Selfishly, he needed to touch her and feel connected to her. Really, he needed to lose himself in her wet heat until he was certain she wouldn’t send him away, but chances of that happening were slim.
“Shh,” he whispered against her ear. “You’re safe, baby.” He pressed a kiss to her earlobe before he returned his mouth to her neck and gently sucked the skin into his mouth.
Against his palm, her nipple puckered to a hard point. He ran his thumb around the nub then gave it a light pinch. Amanda’s whimpers turned into a soft moan of pleasure and he smiled. She may kick him out of her life, she may hate who he’d been, but her body still responded to him as though he owned it.
“Nick?” she asked, her voice thick with sleep and confusion.
He had no idea what time it was, but darkness lay beyond the slit in the shades and he’d guess it was the wee hours of the morning. They’d fallen asleep in early evening.
Amanda rolled to her back. His eyes had adjusted to the dark enough to see her face, but not make out her expression. Was she mad that he had his hands all over her body?
“What’s going on?” she asked.
He positioned himself until he was over her supine form, his stiff cock resting against her soft belly. “You were dreaming,” he said as he worked her shirt up over her bare breasts. “Close your eyes,” he whispered. “You can still be dreaming.”
“Well,” she said in a soft whisper as a smile played across her face and her eyes drifted closed. “I think I’m gonna like this dream.”
If he could, he’d make all her dreams pleasurable. She’d never have a nightmare again. But with each mile they’d traveled, he felt Snake coming back to life and Nick being left behind. Tomorrow, Amanda would see him for who he really was. She’d see the side of him he’d been hiding for so many months. The side of him he no longer felt confident was who he wanted to be. Nick’s life grew fuller by the day and after tomorrow there was a good chance that life would disintegrate.
He cupped her tits and held them together, laving each of her nipples with his tongue. Her breath hitched and she arched her back, pushing her breasts against his face. He’d never taken her like this before, gentle, loving, with reverence. Their passion and chemistry was off the charts and usually they couldn’t tamp it down enough to slow the pace. Aware that there was a very strong chance this would be the last time she’d let him touch her, he fought for control and savored every second his hands and mouth fondled her.
After one last swipe of his tongue, he abandoned her tits and kiss
ed his way down her stomach. A quick peek at her face revealed she had indeed shut her eyes. A faraway smile curved her lips. Maybe she did think she was lost in a pleasurable dream. As he continued his journey downward, she slid her thin fingers into his hair and sifted through the strands. It was an affectionate, almost loving gesture, in contrast to the way she’d grab on and hold his face against her pussy in a frenzy when he ate her out. Tonight, was about taking their time, dreaming, pretending the real world didn’t exist.
When he reached the elastic waistband of her leggings, he ran his tongue along the hem. She gasped and her grip in his hair tightened a fraction. Getting his mouth on her pussy would be amazing, but he wasn’t ready for her to come just yet. He wanted this dream-like state to last as long as possible.
Easing the fabric over her hips, he groaned as the scent of her arousal filled the room. Almost as though worshiping her, he slipped a finger between her pussy lips and teased her opening. She was soft and wet, soaked really. His cock would slide right in without resistance. A shudder racked his body as he recalled the sensation of her hot, wet channel gripping him.
“Nick,” she whispered, and he had no idea if it was a plea or a protest. But then she widened her legs and tilted her pelvis toward him as though encouraging him. He slid one long finger into her and worked it in and out with tender strokes as he coasted back up her body.
When he reached her face, he kissed her in a way he’d never kissed a woman before. Slow, savoring, searching, he explored her mouth with controlled strokes of his tongue, light suction and grazes of his teeth on her lips. Inside her pussy, he kept up a steady but mellow finger fucking. Her hips began to move in time with his laid-back pace. No one was racing toward orgasm tonight. This was all about enjoying the moment, and that made it beyond erotic.
His cock throbbed, nearly painful in its hardened state, but he ignored it.
“Nick,” she whispered again as she pulled her head away and sucked in a breath. “Make love to me.”
He froze and his finger stilled inside her. Make love to her. Did he even know how? He glanced at her face. Her eyes were wide open now, desire filled, but also burning with deep emotions. Amanda would know how to make love. She knew how to love in general. And because of her, he was learning.
He withdrew his finger from its warm paradise and settled his hips between her legs, making sure his cock rested against her sex. Within seconds, the entire length was coated with her juices. He flexed his hips, providing constant pressure against her sensitive core.
“Mmm,” she hummed. “Please, Nick. Give me this.” Her lips were swollen from the long kiss they’d shared and he traced his damp finger across the plump lower one. Her tongue peeked out, following his path and her eyes widened as her own flavor registered.
“I know shit is fucked up right now, Amanda, and I don’t expect you to forgive me right away, or accept who I am, or even understand everything that happened today. And I don’t know for certain what’s going to happen tomorrow, but tonight is for us. Tonight there is no room for Snake or the club. It’s just you and me, Nick.”
Despite the fact that she wanted it, it was unfair of him to do this to her. To either of them really. It would only make it harder if she decided to walk away from him tomorrow.
Her eyes were wide and she drew her lower lip between her teeth. She was everything he wasn’t, but everything his soul had come to crave. Light to his darkness, good to his evil, beauty to his beast.
When she looked back at him, there was an unmistakable sheen in her eyes and guilt hit him hard. He’d put her through so much in the past day. His heart clenched as he imagined her leaving him. It was a reality he would almost certainly have to accept. But not tonight. Tonight was for them.
“Yes, Nick. Give me tonight.”
He wanted to tell her he’d give her forever if she’d have him, but he couldn’t get the words past his throat. Tomorrow he’d be in the presence of the club. What would happen when he stepped back into the role of Snake? Would all the hungry feelings of power and money come rushing back and take over? He wanted to say no, but wasn’t confident enough in his new identity to be certain he wouldn’t fall back into his old position as president of the Grimm Brothers. Amanda would never accept that and he wouldn’t want her to. He wouldn’t want her near that world.
“Make love to me, Nick,” she said as she wrapped her small hand around his dick. Just the feel of her hand sliding over him was enough to set him off and he grit his teeth to keep from coming all over her. When he felt the opening to her pussy sucking at the head, he pushed deep in one long, slow, leisurely stroke.
Amanda gasped and arched off the bed taking him into her as though it was where he belonged. And it was.
“So, good,” she said on a breath. Her eyes drifted closed as he sank to the hilt.
“Eyes, baby. Eyes on me.”
They opened and were glazed with pleasure.
He drew back just as slow and slid into her again. He kept an unhurried and easy pace despite his natural instinct to pound into her. She was soft, warm, and soaking wet around him. Every time he thrust forward, a small sigh of pleasure left her lips.
With their eyes locked, they made slow, sweet love and he swore Amanda could see straight to his soul. He hoped it wasn’t the case, because, while the magic of being with her had healed some of his soul, a portion of it was still black. And he worried the darkness would win out tomorrow and ruin what they’d created.
They came together, staring at each other and gasping their pleasure into the room. Nothing in the world was better than the feel of Amanda coming around his cock. The way she squeezed every inch of him and coated him in her satisfaction was incomparable.
He rolled off her and turned her on her side, enfolding her in his embrace. He needed to feel her, needed to be close just in case he never had the chance again.
There was no denying a lethal reptile lurked under the surface. Tomorrow he’d let that beast free. There was no other option. He would do anything, eliminate anyone, cross any line necessary to keep Amanda safe and happy. He just hoped that reason stayed at the fore front of his mind. Because if vengeance became the primary motive once again, he feared the Snake would be loose forever and Nick would be lost once again.
Chapter Twenty-Eight
Snake slipped out of the motel room and closed the door behind him without a sound. Amanda still slept, and this was not a conversation for her ears. It wasn’t that he didn’t trust her, but her life had been sullied enough by history and she didn’t need details of how he planned to destroy Casper and the rest of the Grimm Brothers in the process.
Pulling his phone out of his pocket, he dialed a number he’d memorized long ago.
Silence greeted him, which wasn’t unexpected. Esteban Fuentes was a cautious bastard bordering on paranoid. He had to be. As the head of the Fuentes cartel, he not only had countless enemies, but both the Mexican and US governments would love nothing more than to see him behind bars for the rest of his life. Well, that was at least the stance the Mexican government took. Unofficially, Esteban tossed them enough money to keep them looking the other way forever.
Actually, Snake was surprised he’d even bothered to answer a call from an unidentified phone number.
“Hable,” Esteban said in a clipped tone.
Snake had about thirty seconds to do as Esteban asked and speak before the man lost interest.
“El Impio,” he said, using the cartel leader’s nickname, The Wicked.
Esteban loved his nickname. Not only did it describe him to a T, but it threw off non-Spanish speakers. They often assumed it was a translation for the imp and expected a small, weak man. El Impio was six feet tall and hard as a rock both in physique and personality. He’d order a man’s death in the most gruesome way then sleep like a baby after watching it carried out.
“Been a long time, brother.”
Silence ensued again and Snake almost laughed. Esteban knew his voice and a cal
l from a dead man would shock anyone, even the evilest of men. Part of him took a bit of twisted pleasure in fucking with the man’s head.
“Culebra.” The Spanish word for snake came through the phone as a whisper.
“Miss me, Esteban?”
“What the fuck?” Esteban asked switching to strongly accented English. “Casper said—”
Snake snorted. “I’m sure Casper told you a great story chock full of all kinds of bullshit. Care to hear the real version? This one is full of betrayal and disloyalty.” Snake knew exactly how to appeal to Esteban. Loyalty was key. Any whiff of betrayal and El Impio would cut a man down no questions asked. Combine that with the fact that according to Cece, Esteban was ready to throw Casper over anyway, and Snake was confident he could get Esteban on board with his plan.
“Carajo! I’ve always known something was off with that little fucker. Diga me.”
With a triumphant smile, Snake filled Esteban in on Casper’s attempted murder plot and how he’d managed to survive. He then outlined his plan to eliminate any future threat from Casper or any of the Grimm Brothers. He could hide behind the noble pursuit of keeping Amanda safe and off the Grimm’s radar, but if he was honest with himself, he straight up wanted revenge.
“You have good timing, Culebra. I’m meeting with your old friend tomorrow morning.”
“Same spot as usual?”
“Si. Meet my man at the convenience store like always. Ten a.m. Leave your vehicle. He’ll take you to me. After I get my money, you can do as you please with your man. I’ve made a connection with a club in New Mexico. They’ll be taking over the business your Grimms have now. Casper has a been a thorn in my side for months. I was done with him before you called.”
