by L. C. Davis
“More or less.” I didn't feel like going into my newly discovered sordid past with him. Not after that. Victor growled low, all traces of his cute side gone.
“What do you want me to do with him?” asked Sebastian.
I eyed him distrustfully. “That depends. Is your killing spree over?”
He narrowed his eyes. “Don't start with me. Not now.”
“Leave him where you found him,” I muttered, brushing my hands off on my pants. “There's been enough death for one night.”
Victor growled unhappily.
Sebastian frowned. “Is there some reason this vampire should be dead?”
I looked him straight in the eye. “None you'd be concerned with.”
He tossed the vampire aside in the sea of parts and looked at the light blue sky tinged with gold. “Why aren't you dead?”
“I was,” I muttered. “Guess I got over it. And I had a partially shattered vial of werewolf blood to heal me.”
He stared at me in shock. “Yeah. Victor didn't rape me, he was donating his blood to help me heal,” I explained. “Once I found out, I couldn't understand why he was keeping it secret. Now I know he was just trying to protect me.”
“From what?” he snapped.
“From you.”
He flinched, but the moment of weakness was gone in an instant. “It's a lot to take in, Remus.”
“Let's not have this conversation now,” I murmured, turning back to Victor. “We have to get him home. He's hurt.”
Sebastian sighed. “He'll be fine until we get back to the Lodge. We need to get him to a forest. There's one not far from here, that's where I shifted.”
“Hopefully your clothes are still there,” I muttered. Victor, can you walk?”
He chuffed at the insinuation of weakness and stood on his hind legs. Then he bristled and stretched proudly.
“Okay, now how are we going to get him down the stairs?” I asked warily.
“We're not,” he replied. “It's swarming with rescue workers, but it's blocked off anyway.”
I frowned. “Why?”
He shrugged. “I broke some stuff on the way up. We have to go down the side.”
“The side?” I balked. “We're thirty stories up and he has a head injury.”
“It's the only way. I've done it before, in my other form.”
“Yeah, the form that wants to kill us both.”
“You're one of them now. I'm sure you could wait for rescue to arrive and compel them.”
Victor snarled and snapped his jaws in warning. Sebastian rolled his eyes. “We're wasting time. Let's get moving.” He walked over to the window and started kicking out the remaining glass that he had been throttling his brother on minutes earlier.
“You're going out like that?” I asked, surprised that he wasn't planning to shift.
“Two werewolves scaling a building is a bit much, even for Texas,” he said, climbing out the window. “Besides, you were right about one thing. If I see you in that form again, I will kill you.”
With that, he disappeared along with any trace of hope I had that things could go back to the way they had been. Victor scooped me into his huge furry arms before I could dwell on Sebastian's words anymore.
“Whoa, wait,” I protested. He held me close to his chest with one arm.
“Just hold onto my fur.” His silken voice filled my mind for the first time in far too long.
“So you can hear me?” I asked hopefully.
“Yes, and now I know why, but we can talk about it when we get home,” he offered. “Just close your eyes and don't look down.”
I took him up on that advice once he leaned out the window, allowing me to see how high up we were. My monster movie nostalgia was in overdrive as I clung to him. I had no idea how Sebastian was getting down on his own, because it felt perilous enough in a giant creature's arms.
After what seemed like an eternity, Victor lowered us onto the ground, flung me onto his back, and took off running for the forest visible beyond the hotel parking lot. It was paltry cover, but maybe it would at least hide us long enough for him to shift back.
I looked back at the quickly disappearing vision for any signs of Sebastian. As cruel as I felt he was being, and as dampened as my emotions now were, I still loved him. Fortunately, the chaos out front seemed to have drawn most of the attention. That combined with Victor's speed let us pass into the forest unnoticed. I hoped.
He kept running long past the point where I would have thought would be safe to stop. I clung to his fur and watched as the trees passed almost as fast as they did in the highway. I was sure he wasn't going at his full speed either, if only for my sake. “What are you looking for?” I asked, deciding to give his mind a break.
He glanced at me over his shoulder. “I'm following Sebastian's scent.”
Of course.
“I'm sorry about the way he's being. To tell the truth, he's handling it better than I expected.”
That wasn't as reassuring as he seemed to think it should be. “You've been trying to prepare me for it this whole time, haven't you? The comments about how much he hates vampires. Even the letter.”
“I have,” he admitted. “Advantageous though it may be for me when my brother makes an ass of himself, I never wanted you to be hurt.”
“That makes one of you,” I muttered, ducking to the side when a tree came a little too close.
“Sorry,” he said, slowing his speed. “My head is a bit foggy.”
“It's okay, I can't really be afraid right now,” I admitted.
“Since when?” His concern was unmistakable.
“Since I had to block it out to kill Jeff's parents.”
“Block out? How?” He was almost frantic.
“I just used that technique you taught me in the vision, about raising a wall up from the ground to block out something you don't want,” I explained, wondering if he had forgotten.
“That technique is for keeping people out of your mind. It's not for keeping other things in. How did you even know that would work?”
“I guess I just had a feeling,” I said. “My emotions and beliefs were making it harder to do what I needed to do to save you, so I just shut them out. I guess I could take the wall down again, but honestly, I don't want to feel any of those things right now. Not with the way he's being.”
“It doesn't work like that, Remus. You can't just take down a psychic block, not one like that. Sarah removed them all, but now your mind has learned and will hold onto them even harder, even though you're the one who put them there,” he explained. He was so earnest, I wanted to care if only for his sake. But I couldn't. It was hard to care about anything except them. Even that was beginning to get harder where Sebastian was concerned.
“Let's worry about you first, okay?” I laid my head on his massive shoulder. He might be smaller in comparison to Sebastian, but he was still huge. At least my strange affliction was making it impossible to be scared of him, although his nature was admittedly a part of that.
He gave an audible sigh but he let it go and came to a stop suddenly. Sebastian was there, holding his crumpled clothing. “You made it.”
“Don't sound so overjoyed,” I muttered, sliding off Victor's back.
“What's his problem?” asked Sebastian. He waited like he was getting a response. If he was, Victor wasn't sharing it with me. Sebastian scowled and walked over.
“Are you going to be able to shift now?” I asked, stroking Victor's fur.
“You know he can't answer you,” said Sebastian. “We're bonded as twins, that's the only reason I can talk to him.”
“I can speak to you both,” said Victor.
Sebastian's eyes widened, then narrowed sharply. “That's impossible.” He turned to see if I was listening.
“I think he would know best,” I said. “Tell me something only you would know.”
The wolf rolled his eyes. “He's afraid of thunderstorms, so he would climb in my bed until they sto
pped. Until the age of fourteen.”
I normally would have laughed at an embarrassing detail like that, but I could only manage a small stifled laugh for Victor's sake. I turned to Sebastian. “What happened at fourteen, did someone tell you it wasn't really angels bowling?”
He went white as a sheet. “What the fuck, Victor? And-- How the hell can you hear him?” he demanded.
“If I didn't know better I'd think you were jealous,” I said thoughtfully. “The question is, of me or him?”
He glared. “Can we just get on with this? Remus, go somewhere, just stay close.”
“No,” I said, moving closer to Victor. “I'm not leaving until I know what you're going to do to him.”
He rolled his eyes. “Same thing I've always one and he's here to tell the tale.”
“Let him stay, Sebastian. He's already seen me at my worst.”
I looked between them with renewed concern. “Victor, what has to happen before you can turn back?”
The beast let out a deep, ashamed sigh as he sank into a lying position. “I have to taste blood, preferably in combat with a worthy opponent. Specifically, I must bite someone. If not, a small donation works. Whether it's a curse or a hangup, I honestly don't know.”
“I volunteer,” said immediately.
They looked at each other before replying in unison.
“No.”
“No.”
I crossed my arms. “I've been staked, thrown, slashed and drugged in the past twenty-four hours. I think I can handle a werewolf bite.”
“It's shameful enough to sink fangs into my own brother, never mind his... mate.” There was a hint of sadness in his words. Sebastian looked uncomfortable, but whether it was because he recognized Victor's pain or was just uncomfortable being reminded that I was his mate at all, it was had to tell.
“You saved my life, Victor. Please let me do this,” I said earnestly. I didn't trust that Sebastian wasn't going to snap and attack him again. His tolerance for blood taking of any kind was thin those days. “What's the worst that can happen, I turn into a werewolf?”
He made a brief chuffing sound not unlike laughter. “It's not my call, kiddo. Ask your mate.”
I clenched my jaw, annoyed that Victor was picking this moment to respect that particular boundary. I glanced at Sebastian and he shrugged. “He can do whatever he wants.”
It was that moment I knew he really was done with me. The Sebastian who was in love with me would never utter those words, never mind when it came to something where a potential injury was involved.
Victor nudged me in consolation. He must have thought I was hurt. I was, in a way, but it wasn't the fatal blow it would have been before. I stroked his fur to let him know I was okay and hoped that wasn't offensive. From the way his bur bristled and he nuzzled my hand, it didn't seem to be.
“He's just upset. He'll be back to his old self eventually,” said Victor.
“Maybe,” I agreed, not wanting to speak out loud. “I'm more worried about you right now. What do I need to do to help you shift back?”
His pointed ears flattened against his head even more than their natural resting position. “Unfortunately, I have to actually bite you. Location doesn't matter to me, but I usually bite the arm.” His gaze flickered to my scarred arms with a regretful look. “I think I should stick with Sebastian.”
I followed his eyes to the scars. They had been bare the entire evening and it was the first time I'd thought of them since the vision. The sight of them didn't evoke the usual revulsion. Maybe it was because Sarah had removed Jeff's mental blocks, or maybe it was because I had placed my own, but it didn't matter anymore.
“They're just scars,” I told him, shrugging. “At least it would look like I got hurt.”
His silence was full of worry, but he didn't argue. Sebastian was growing restless behind us and I turned to see him stalking towards us.
“Are you talking back to him in there?” He sounded annoyed.
“I'm part vampire, Sebastian.”
“Vampires can't get into our minds in our beast forms,” he said.
I turned to Victor for an explanation. His eyes blinked innocently. “I don't know.”
He was lying. He did know. He had admitted as much before we left the ballroom. Whatever the reason, he clearly didn't want Sebastian to know the answer and I wasn't going to argue with that. Not now.
“Let's just move on with this,” I said, holding out my arm.
Sebastian moved closer, eying my exposed side and the gashes that ran down it from Victor's claws. “I didn't do that,” he said. There was a hint of doubt in his voice, like he wasn't sure.
“It's nothing.”
Victor hung his head in shame and I put my extended hand on his muzzle to stroke him.
“You did that?” Sebastian growled.
I shot him a sharp glare. “Care or don't, just pick one.”
His jaw clenched. I could tell just looking at me was a struggle for him now. “I don't have to like what you are to care if someone hurts you. You're still my mate.” The word stuck in his throat a little.
“It wasn't his fault,” I said, ignoring the last part. “Sarah got to him as a human and put a kill switch in his mind to trigger as soon as I disobeyed her. Then she forced him to shift.”
Sebastian's face softened as he looked at his brother. “I'm sorry. How was I supposed to know?”
“You could try not jumping to the worst possible conclusion about him every chance you get,” I said, emboldened by my minds mangled state. He didn't seem to know what to do with that either, which was probably a good thing.
“If you're gonna do this, do it,” he snapped. “We've gotta move.”
Well, he was right about one thing. I held my arm out to Victor again. “Go ahead, Victor.”
He looked up at me with the mournful gaze of a dog who was about to bite the human he was sworn to guard. I gave him the most reassuring smile I could muster to show him I wasn't afraid. I could feel that it didn't meet my eyes and only hoped he wouldn't take numbness as fear.
He walked a bit closer, still on all fours. His mouth opened, giving me an up close glimpse at those massive jaws. I could feel Sebastian gauging my reaction, waiting for me to chicken out. Victor hesitated, probably waiting for the same.
I stood my ground and held eye contact with the beast to show him that I wasn't going to back out. He made a reluctant whining sound before his jaws clamped down on my forearm and released. It happened so fast that I felt the blood before the pain.
Sebastian made a low growling sound from behind me, but he said nothing. Victor locked my arm apologetically, also partly tasting the blood that came out of the numerous fresh holes in my arm. There was a parabolic arch of them across the middle now.
“Better now?” I asked. He looked at me in a mixture of shame and confusion.
“I'm fine, but are you?”
I shrugged. “It's not a big deal. Anyway, it'll heal if I drink your blood.”
They looked at one another. “Wolf's blood doesn't heal vampires on the harvest moon,” said Sebastian. “It'll heal later, sure. But the ones from his claws won't.”
“What? Why not?” I frowned, turning to face him.
“Because a wound from a werewolf under the harvest moon never heals period, with or without wolf's blood,” he said.
I looked at my side and realized it was still seeping a little blood. “Oh.”
“Don't worry. You can't die from blood loss,” Sebastian muttered. “Ironically.”
“That's not ironic, Sebastian,” I corrected him. “Ironic would be if we could die from blood loss. That would be unexpected.”
He scowled at me. “Guess you would know, being a college dropout and all.”
Anger flared up inside of me. “Yeah, I probably am at this point, but it's only because I've been running around trying to clean up the mistakes of the idiot who marked me with a stamp,” I said pointedly.
“Oh, so I'm an id
iot now?” He crossed his arms. “I've been waiting for that one to come out.”
“Why not put all the cards out on the table? You've made it very clear how you feel about blood sucking monsters like me.”
“Your words,” he snapped. “Not mine.”
“Not about me specifically, no, but vampires in general. And your actions since last night have made it obvious that I'm just another one of them to you now.”
“Well, you're acting like it,” said Sebastian. “What am I supposed to think? You're not yourself anymore, I can barely even see your m-”
“Children, please,” groaned Victor. “I have a terrible migraine.” It wasn't inside my mind. His words were as audible as Sebastian's. I spun around to see him standing in the nude and ran to embrace him.
“You're back,” I said, breathing a sigh of relief.
His laugh was soft and hoarse in my ear as he returned my embrace. “Far be it for me to complain, but maybe I should put some clothes on.”
I stepped back and smiled apologetically. “Yeah. Sure.”
Sebastian looked ready to kill as he brought over his old crumpled clothes for his brother to wear. I would normally have averted my eyes out of decency, but there didn't seem to be any harm in taking a peek. Victor's body was more muscular than I had imagined it, but he was still lean and almost wiry somehow like his beast form. The scar over his heart was as white and prominent as I remembered it from the dream. As for everything south of the equator, well, the family resemblance was obvious.
Sebastian caught me looking but I didn't wither away or make excuses like I once would have. Instead I smirked and gave a small shrug before turning away.
It was too bad Sebastian was being such an ass. The Fulton brothers would make one hell of a twin study.
32
That night we stayed in one of those hotels that you can always see from the highway but never get to easily. Sebastian went in to book the room since he was the least worse for the wear out of the three of us. We still had my rental after circling back to the hotel parking lot with a human Victor. The emergency evacuation aspect of the situation had been cleared by then, and only a few police cars hung around to offer protection for the cleanup crews.
