by Luccia Gray
“Perhaps Nell can use some of yours, Mrs. Mason.”
I was surprised at Michael’s suggestion. “Of course you can, Nell. Go upstairs and bring down my jar.”
She rushed out of the room again and Michael turned back to the hearth with his hands covering his face.
“Michael,” I whispered. “Are you all right?”
He turned to me and looked into my eyes for a long time. He took my hand, kissed it and held it against his cheek.
“Did you find Helen?”
He smiled and dropped my hand as Nell flew back into the room with the cream.
I busied myself with her hair while Michael stared intently. When I finished he smiled at me, and then told Nell it was the most perfect plait he had ever seen and sat back on the couch. His body was relaxed, yet his brow was furrowed and his look distant.
“Would you like some tea, Lieutenant?” I asked.
“Yes, thank you, I would love some tea.”
“Nell, ask Leah to see to it that we have tea, meat sandwiches and cakes brought in.”
When she had left the room, Michael still did not speak. He put his arm across my shoulders and pulled me close to him, kissed my cheek and stared quietly into the flames.
“Why is it so hard for you to tell me what you have discovered in London?”
“Because I do not wish to lie, yet I cannot tell you the truth.”
“Why not?”
He sighed heavily and looked straight into my eyes. “Because I am not yet sure and I do not wish you to be hurt again with false promises or expectations.”
“Did you find her?”
“I believe she is not in London.”
“Why do you say ‘is’?”
He was silent, his look tortured.
“Please, Michael, tell me what you know.”
“I cannot be sure.”
I waited for him to speak, but he just stared into the fireplace.
“My heart is racing. Speak to me! Tell me if she is alive.”
“I have reason to believe that she may be alive.”
“Where?”
I took his hands in mine and searched his eyes for answers. “I cannot tell you where I think she may be without causing you further distress.”
“But you are causing me distress! What do you mean? Is she unwell?”
“If she is where I believe her to be, you need not worry.”
“What game are you playing with me? I need not worry? Tell me or get out!” I must have screamed because Fred rushed in.
“Mrs. Mason, is anything the matter?”
I realised hot tears were burning my cheeks. I stood and a handkerchief was thrust into my hands. I wiped my tears and moved to the window.
“Everything is fine, Fred. Mrs. Mason is upset, that’s all.”
“Shall I call Dr. Carter, madam?”
“No, thank you, Fred. Dr. Carter will be coming later. I will speak to him then. Please leave us.”
He nodded and left. I felt Michael’s hands on my shoulders and I turned around and buried my tears in his chest. His arms slid around my back, and everything was as it had been. I broke free. “I’m sorry, Michael, you must think me such a fool.”
He held my face in his hands, wiping my tears away with his thumbs. “Not at all, Jane. You are not a fool. You are a mother in search of her daughter.”
“Where is she? Have you seen her? What is she like?” He was still silent. “Tell me, please.”
“Do you trust me, Jane?”
“Of course I trust you, Michael.”
“You have waited over ten years to find her. Could you wait six months until I come back, and we shall find her together?”
“Why not now?”
“Because there’s not enough time. I must leave and I want to be with you when we find her. I don’t want to leave you with another worrying situation on your hands while I’m away. Trust me, Jane, will you?”
I nodded. It felt so reassuring to hear him use my name. I touched his face, as I had done the first time I saw him. “I like to hear you call me Jane,” I whispered.
He turned his head and kissed my palm. “Jane, I wish you could call me Michael always.”
I sighed into his lips. “I wish we could be Jane and Michael.”
A knock on the door broke our embrace. Nell came in with Beth, who seemed to be crying.
“Please leave the tray on the table by the fireplace, Beth.”
The young girl sniffed, nodded, and left.
“I do not know what has got into Beth lately.”
“Perhaps matters of the heart. I think she is attached to Simon.”
“I’m glad Simon has found a nice girl. I hope he’s treating her well.”
“I have no doubt that Simon is good to her.”
“By the way, do you know where he’s been? Beth said something about a sick relative in London.”
“I saw him in London. I had told him where I was staying before I left, and he came to see me. He had some family problems. We visited his cousin in the Strand.”
I wondered uneasily how much they both knew about Richard’s death.
“Simon should have told me. We were worried, and then Richard’s unexpected death…”
“It was rather sudden. I’ll tell you about it later,” he said as he nodded towards Nell.
“Sit down and have something to eat, Lieutenant. You must be hungry after such a long journey.”
Michael devoured the sandwiches. “Are you not eating?”
“We’ve had lunch, but I’ll have some tea.”
As I poured our tea, Nell asked me, “May I have a piece of cake, Mrs. Mason?”
“Of course you can, Nell. Eat as much as you like.” I remembered how thin and sickly she had been when she had arrived at Eyre Hall over a year ago, and marvelled at how healthy she looked now.
“Michael, are you staying with us at Eyre Hall?” Nell asked while nibbling the icing off a fairy cake. I smiled, recalling how I used to like doing so, too, on the rare occasions I was able to eat one, when I was a child.
“I’m staying very nearby, at The Rochester Arms.”
“Why don’t you stay here with us? You used to live downstairs, didn’t you?”
“Michael is no longer a servant, Nell. He cannot sleep in the servant’s quarters. Next time he comes to Eyre Hall, he will sleep upstairs, with the guests and members of the family.”
“Am I a servant or a guest, Mrs. Mason? Sometimes I sleep downstairs with my mother, and sometimes upstairs with you.”
“I think you should sleep upstairs every day,” said Michael, briskly. “You are a companion, not a servant, is she not, Mrs. Mason?”
“Michael is right, Nell. You are not a servant. You will sleep upstairs with me for the time being. When the extension is built, you can have a room for yourself. Would you like that?”
“Yes, I would! But what about my mother, won’t she mind?”
“Why would she mind?” I asked.
“Because she says I spend too much time upstairs.”
Michael patted her hand. “Your mother will be leaving Eyre Hall, soon, but Mrs. Mason will tell you about that later, Nell. I am sure Mrs. Mason will be delighted if you spend more time upstairs.”
I looked at him quizzically, wondering what he had in mind, but he interrupted my thoughts by asking Nell what she was reading.
“I’m reading Persuasion. It is about Captain Wentworth and Anne Elliot. They are in love. They could not marry when they first met because her parents didn’t approve of him, but now he has come back. Her family are almost ruined, and he is a sea captain, so this time she is allowed to marry him, although he teased her a bit first! That wasn’t very nice of him.”
“Well, he was probably feeling hurt, don’t you think?”
“Yes, I do. He wrote her a lovely letter, and they are getting married of course. It is a romance. I wish someone would write me a letter like that.”
“I am sure they will, wh
en you are a few years older,” he said as he squeezed her nose, “but he better be good to you, or he shall be in trouble with me!”
“You are almost a captain, Michael. I was hoping to marry you when I’m older!”
He laughed. “I am honoured at your proposal, Miss Rosset, but you are much too young to think about marriage. I think you have been reading too many romances. You ought to read Treasure Island or Gulliver’s Travels next time.”
“Exactly, Lieutenant,” I added. “We have had enough of Jane Austen. Treasure Island is next on our list, so we shall know what it is like to be out at sea for months, like you. Now. Nell, would you take Flossy, Keeper and Piper for a walk?”
“Yes!” she said, jumped up and rushed to the door.
“Ask Fred or Daisy if they would like to go with you. It is getting dark, and put on your heavy coat and winter bonnet.”
She nodded and hugged Michael again before rushing out of the room.
“Perhaps you will tell me what all that was about, Michael?”
“Would you prefer Nell to sleep downstairs?”
“Of course not. She often sleeps with me. I meant about her mother leaving Eyre Hall.”
He sighed. “Jane, there is something you need to be told. Simon has informed me that Jenny and Thomas have been ill–treating Nell.”
I gasped. “What?”
“You have noticed she seems to fall down the stairs too frequently?”
I nodded in disbelief.
“There were no falls. She was hit, mercilessly.”
I jumped from the couch. “How could I have been so blind?”
Michael rushed to my side, taking my hand. “It is not your fault, Jane.
“Michael, why did she not tell me? Why would they do that to her?”
“She has also been locked in a closet.”
“How dreadful! Why?”
“I cannot imagine why. Jenny used to be concerned with Nell’s well–being, but lately she seems to resent her. She may be jealous.”
“Of her own daughter?”
“It has been known to happen. Nell spends a great deal of time with you upstairs, and you have bought her clothes, and taught her how to be a perfect little lady; perhaps she no longer fits in with her family downstairs. They seem to have rejected her.”
“Why did nobody tell me?”
“Perhaps they didn’t want to interfere in family matters.”
“Michael, what should I do?”
“I think Jenny and her son should leave Eyre Hall, and Nell should stay here with you.”
“Of course, but surely they should be punished?”
“Perhaps it is better to keep them away from her, in case they cause her further problems.”
“Poor child! She has been so patient with me. I am sure she saved my life, Michael, when I was ill.”
“Nell must stay with you. It is the only way to make sure she is never hurt, locked away, or needy again. ‘Do to others as you would have them do to you.’ If you look after Nell, someone will be looking after Helen. Promise me whatever happens, you will never abandon Nell.”
“Of course.”
“Promise me, Jane.”
“I promise I will never abandon Nell.”
“Good. Now about Jenny and Thomas. They are willing to travel to Australia.”
“Australia? So far?” I put my arms around him. “I would die if you were to go to Australia, Michael.”
“Why would I go to Australia?” he asked as I cried on his shoulder. “What is the matter, Jane? Why are you so upset?”
“I cannot bear to think of you in Australia. I missed you so much, Michael.”
“I missed you, too, but please don’t cry, my love,” he whispered as he caressed my hair.
“When they are in Australia, Nell will be safe. If they stay in the area, you never know. They have the right to see her, take her away, and sell her even.”
“How dreadful! Poor little Nell.”
“They will be part of an assisted passage scheme. You could pay for the journey and, once there, they will be allotted a piece of land to live on. There are many homeless English people travelling to Australia willingly.”
“If Jenny agrees, I think it’s a good idea.”
“She has signed the papers,” he said as he handed them to me. “Their ship leaves for Australia in less than a week.”
“But will Nell not miss her mother?”
“I think not. She will be safer and happier with you at Eyre Hall.”
He pulled me close to him. “Shall we have some brandy?” I nodded and he moved to the cabinet and filled two glasses.
I sat on the carpet by the fireplace and patted the rug for him to sit beside me. We sat drinking in silence. I fell against his chest and closed my eyes as he wrapped his arms around me and traced my face and neck with soft kisses. He lowered his head, searching for my lips and I melted into his warmth. When I opened my eyes much later, the moon was shining on my face.
“Michael, I don’t ever want to be anywhere else except in your arms.”
He held me tighter and nuzzled my hair, which he must have loosened as I was sleeping.
“How did you find Fred?”
“I needed a valet and the vicar, Mr. Woods, recommended him. Why? Do you not approve of him?”
“I do not approve of any man who spends all day near you. He will see you, hear you, serve you, and look at you, every day.”
“Michael, I can’t believe you are jealous of Fred.”
“I’m jealous of everyone who is near you while I am away. I cannot help it. It drove me mad when I found out you were marrying Mason. I had to leave. I would have killed him if I had stayed. I almost killed him when I returned to Eyre Hall.”
“I made a mistake, Michael. I was afraid to face the truth, and I didn’t consider your feelings. I paid a dear price for my mistake. I lost you and our child. Have you forgiven me?”
“I forgave you a long time ago, but I have not forgiven myself yet for leaving you the way I did, and now I am terrified of losing you again.”
“Michael, there is no one else and there will never be anyone else. I have given you my heart, my body, and my soul, once more. On your terms this time.”
He turned me towards him, his lips more impatient and his hands demanding.
“Michael, we can’t go upstairs now, there are too many guests.”
“We can stay here. It is where we first kissed.”
“Someone could come in.”
“It’s locked.”
“Will they hear us?”
“They are too busy eating, drinking, and gossiping.”
“Michael, I feel wicked, receiving condolences and making love to you.”
“Then do not make love to me. Let me make love to you. I do not feel wicked. I feel like the most fortunate man on earth.”
I sighed and yielded effortlessly to his persistent words and caresses. His mouth silenced my cries as his chest pressed my breasts and his hips pushed into mine. He rolled away too soon, apologising for his weight and vigour, and I wanted to tell him to stay because I longed to lie beneath the pressure of his lust until all my breath has been squeezed out and I was dissolved inside his desire.
We lay limply entwined, listening to our heartbeats and the crackling fire for a long time. At last Michael spoke.
“What happened to Mason?”
“I don’t know. When Fred went up to help him dress the morning after Twelfth Night, he was dead in his bed. Dr. Carter has certified natural causes on his death certificate, to avoid scandal, but he thinks he was murdered.”
“Why does he think so?”
“As you know, he’s interested in forensic medicine, well, he believes it was arsenic. He has been investigating. He would like to speak to you. He must have arrived by now. Do you mind?”
“Of course not. Let us find him, shall we?”
He took my face in his hands and then smoothed my hair. “It is fortunate that Nell brought
down your combs and hair cream.”
“Oh dear. Michael, do I look a mess?”
“You look beautiful, Jane,” he said kissing me again, and fondling my hair with his fingers, “but I would not want anyone else to see you looking so ravished.”
I looked at my reflection in the mirror. I wanted to tell him I loved feeling ravished, but we would have time for that. Instead, I smiled back at my flushed face and unruly hair, and then I tamed it with my combs, cream, and hairpins.
***
Chapter XVIII – Murderers Confess
I was indulging in idle conversation with the guests when Mrs. Mason and Lieutenant Kirkpatrick walked in together. She looked unusually rosy cheeked and at ease by his side, while he towered beside her confidently. In spite of their age and social difference, they appeared to belong together. I knew his devotion to Mrs. Mason was beyond doubt, but he was high on my list of suspects. He was in love with the victim’s wife, so he had the greatest motive. He had been away from Eyre Hall when the murder was committed; nevertheless, he could have acted with an accomplice. I was impatient to question him on the matter, and although I would have preferred to do so alone, I knew Mrs. Mason would never allow it.
Mrs. Mason asked me to follow them into the library and we sat by the fireplace sipping brandy and discussing London.
“I visited St. Thomas’s Hospital, Dr. Carter. I was interested after our last conversation. An impressive building, indeed.”
“I do not miss London, but I do miss St. Thomas’s. Did you stay in Southwark?”
“Yes, I stayed at the George Inn, and I can’t imagine anyone getting any fresh air in the area, as Miss Nightingale would propose.”
He nodded and our conversation diverged to the quaint public houses, and lively Borough Market. Mrs. Mason surprised us by telling us she had recently taken a walk around the area at night with the respected writer Mr. Charles Dickens, whose novel, Oliver Twist, was set in the area.
We were chatting amiably and on our second brandy when Mrs. Mason addressed my major suspect. “Lieutenant Kirkpatrick, Dr. Carter has a theory about Mr. Mason’s death which I’d like you to hear.”
I cleared my throat. “It is my belief that Mr. Mason was murdered, and we are searching for this person or persons.”
The lieutenant smirked. “Mr. Mason is dead and almost buried. I can see no point in searching for his murderer, if indeed there is one.”
