Shaking off the thought with a smile, I climbed out of my jeans and into the shower letting the water wash over me and take with it most of the grogginess I felt.
When I close my eyes, my mind tends to wander and as it did, I couldn’t help but think of the last few months and all that had changed since the attack on my way home from work. I’d spent a month in the hospital, at least that’s what I was told and more than once I was reminded of the miracle that pulled me from the clutches of death. I had never seen Cordillia cry so much as the day I woke up and in its own way I was happy to see it. At least I had spared her the pain of losing someone else so close to her.
A smile shaped my lips as I thought about Jenna for the first time in months. She was beautiful and blond like my mother but unlike her, she was a wild and exciting woman that grabbed my heart from the moment I saw her. It was her hair that caught my attention first, the way the sun bounced off of it and made it shine. She was with me through it all, even took care of Cordillia while I was in the hospital and as I looked back, it was easy to see that I couldn’t have asked for someone better.
And yet after I got home more than my appearance had changed. I couldn’t control my temper anymore, my paranoia or my tongue. I accused her of cheating and of not really loving me and when she didn’t respond, I lost myself completely. Thankfully I made it out of the house and away from her in time but it wasn’t long after that I….
I couldn’t think about it anymore, how I’d hurt her and accused her of things she would never do. She was a good girl, I knew that and I would give anything to take it back. I would miss her hair, her eyes and the way she smelled like flowers only sweeter but at least now she could find someone better for her, someone safer.
Violently, I was pulled from my thoughts with the sound of an incessant yet gentle knock at the door and it wasn’t until I looked up that I realized my shower had gone ice cold.
How long had I been daydreaming?
Shutting off the water, I began to dry off as the knocking became steadily louder and desperate.
“Just a second!” I called as I crawled into my jeans and threw on my shirt before making my way quickly to the door. My eyes darted to the clock as I pulled back the lock. 3:32, I paused. “How did I lose two hours?” I muttered to myself.
“Ethan, come on, it’s dark out here!” she called impatiently.
Undoing the chain, I opened the door to greet her. A gust of cool air and perfume flooded the room and I couldn’t help but smile as I saw her standing there, small, thin and somehow menacing despite it all. Dressed in her pajamas and a red bag slung over her shoulder, she glared at me with a smile.
“Are you going to let me in or make me stand here all night?” she smirked, her voice sweet and dripping with sarcasm. I pulled the door open wide and stepped to the side to let her in. She dropped her bag next to mine on the tiny round table and turned to face me as I slid the lock into place and met her accusing eyes with a sigh.
“So?” She crossed her arms at her chest as she waited for the simple explanation she had come here expecting. I wished it was that easy, really I did. I motioned to the bed behind her and watched as she took a seat before I pulled a chair from the table next to me and turned it to face her, my heart racing as I sat down and rested my elbows on my knees.
She sighed impatiently as she uncrossed her arms and laid them gently on her lap. “Are you going to tell me what the hell is going on or are you planning on tying me up and making a run for it?” Her eyebrow rose. I couldn’t tell if she was joking or really not sure. I laughed and she scowled. “What?” She smirked.
“The thought had crossed my mind.” I smiled playfully.
“Don’t be a jackass. I came all this way…” she attempted to be stern with me but I could see the smile that hid behind her scowl, the one that told me nothing had really changed between us.
“Relax, Cordy, it’s just good to see you.” I smiled. She rolled her eyes at me and pulled her legs up under her.
“Don’t call me that,” she added with a huff. “Now come on tell me what the hell is going on.” I thought for a moment. Could I really do this? Should I? She eyed me from the bed as she waited for me to answer. It was obvious she was growing more impatient as time went on. How could I explain the impossible, something that I barely believed myself?
“Cordy,” I paused as she glared at me. “Sorry, Cordillia.” She relaxed a bit and I started again. “First of all I’m not just running away from you.” She rolled her eyes and shook her head. “No, don’t give me that I’m not,” I added sternly. “This last year has been a big mess, you know that and it’s not that I think your some kid who can’t handle the truth.” She smiled slightly as I mocked her. “But you have to believe me when I say that I really thought that leaving was better than bringing you into something that I don’t even want to be a part of.”
“What the hell is that even supposed to mean?” she scoffed as she stared me down.
“It means that I left because I thought it was the right thing to do for both of us, I still do and this...” I motioned between her and I. “This doesn’t change anything.” I saw the hurt in her eyes as I said this but I knew my sister well enough to know that she thought I would come home after all this. It hurt but it needed to be said.
I sighed and took a longer pause than needed, I was stuck and I hoped to God the inspiration would come and I would just magically know what to say. After a few moments I realized it wouldn’t.
“Ethan,” she groaned slightly as she leaned forward and took a deep breath. “You can trust me,” she spoke with such conviction that I couldn’t help but believe her even though there was a part of me that was still unsure. Our eyes met and for a moment I felt like it was all going to be okay, I felt crazy for ever thinking I needed to leave.
“It’s not that I don’t trust you.” I sighed as I ran my hands through my hair. “Look, I’m not the same man I was before. Let me explain,” I managed before she could speak. I took a deep breath and placed my face in my hands. The frustration of not knowing what to say was eating away at me and every instinct in my body wanted to run screaming from the room, a luxury I didn’t have.
“Do you remember when I was attacked a few months ago?” I asked not sure where I was going to go with this. She nodded lightly, the understanding in her eyes calmed me and I began again. “The thing is I’m not so sure that it was an animal that attacked me that night.” I paused, giving her the chance to speak.
“Of course it wasn’t, Ethan, you were mugged,” she reminded me. I felt the frustration welling up in me again.
“No, I mean...” I sighed and closed my eyes for a quick second. “Yes it was but it wasn’t.” I thought about what I had just said, if she wasn’t confused already that did it for sure. I looked into her face and immediately knew I was right. She was puzzled. I remembered the scar and a light came on for just a second. I could show her, I could make her see what I was trying to say.
I stood up and lifted my shirt over my head, tossing it onto the bed next to her.
“Look.” I pointed to the jagged scar on my shoulder. “I wasn’t just mugged, Cordillia,” I tried to explain. “This thing came out of nowhere, it saved my life and it left me with this.”
The puzzled look on her face turned into horror as she stared up at me.
“What?” she asked more shocked than questioning.
“I don’t know, Cordy, I don’t know.” I paused. For the first time she didn’t say anything about my pet name for her she just stood up and walked over to me, taking a closer look at the scar on my shoulder.
“I was at the hospital with you,” she stammered. “How did I not know about this?”
“Because it was healed over by the time you got there.” She shot back slightly, her face stained with disbelief.
“No, that’s not possible.” She shook her head. “I came as soon as I got the call as soon as you were admitted to the ICU.”
“You’
re telling me.” I smirked as I grabbed my shirt and pulled it over my head. “The paramedics said it should have taken my arm off, damn near did but it was healed before the doctor even saw me.” She stared at me as I spoke quickly, “He probably thought it was old and didn’t see the point in telling you. Believe me, Cordillia, I’ve gone over this a million times in my mind. If there was a better explanation, I would give it to you.”
“Okay so wait,” She closed her eyes as she processed what I had just said. “What does this have to do with you leaving?” I groaned and sat back down.
“A lot.”
“You do realize you’re not making much sense here.” I nodded as a smile crossed my face.
“You think this is confusing and fucked up?” I chuckled. “Imagine being me here...” She threw herself back down on the bed and shot me a weary glance.
“I think I was better off just thinking you were sick of California,” she muttered as she ran her hands over her face with a groan.
“Why do you think I did what I did?”
“Okay,” She looked up at me. “So you left California because you were mugged and some...” She motioned to my shoulder. “I don’t know, wild animal gave you a scar? Why does that not make any Goddamn sense?” She glared at me as she leaned forward and rested herself on her knees.
“It wasn’t an animal.”
“Okay then what the hell was it, spider man?” she sat up as she shouted at me. She was furious and there was nothing I could do to change it.
“I don’t know,” I growled, trying the best I could to contain myself. “All I know is that after it happened I haven’t been the same and I really thought it was best for you if I just took off.”
“Oh really? I’m nineteen years old, Ethan, not a child...”
“I know that,” I barked.
“So do me a favor and maybe stop treating me like one and tell me the truth.”
“I’m trying,” my voice was sharp but it didn’t seem to faze her as she looked at me, expecting an answer. “What do you want me to say, Cordillia? That my hair grows too fast, I’m getting stronger every day, that I’m changing in horrible ways and I don’t even know how to believe it let alone explain it to the one person who deserves an explanation? God I didn’t want to do this!” I screamed. I had to gain control of my temper and fast. My thoughts flashed back to Jenna and what could have happened if I hadn’t left the apartment when I did.
“Then I’ll go with you to a doctor and we can-”
“No doctors!” I screamed as I put my fist through the oak table by the door. She shot back slightly, frozen with fear and so was I. My strength was growing and I was slowly losing control of it. “No doctors,” I did my best to speak calmly as I closed my eyes and took a deep breath. “They wouldn’t help, they would treat me like some, I don’t know, freak show or something.” My breath relaxed and I began to feel my pulse slow back down.
“Okay,” she said in barely more than a whisper. Her body relaxed as she stared at the floor and I couldn’t blame her for not looking at me. After that I didn’t want to ether.
“So what do you think is going on?” she asked me quietly. There was a long pause, a silence between us before she looked up and met my eyes. I smiled. How could I not? She was so sweet, so caring. She smiled back at me in a way to let me know that everything was alright.
“I’ve thought about a lot of things.” I sighed. “At first I thought I was crazy and then the night Jenna left me-” the pain in my voice was more than obvious. I still missed her. It would be a while until that pain went away I was sure.
“You never did tell me what happened,” she spoke quietly as she twisted her fingers together nervously. “But I remember it was the first time I saw you cry, the first time I saw you scared.”
“We got into a fight that much you know. I got angry and I felt like I needed to leave.” I sighed as I sat back down and leaned forward on my knees. “I guess I kind of knew that if I didn’t something bad would happen.” I looked over at her, my heart pounding in my chest as I thought carefully about what I was going to say.
“I left the apartment and went for a walk,” I continued, stopping every so often to read her face. “I got a few blocks away and all I remember was being in so much pain I couldn’t stand.” She shot me a confused glance as I looked over at her. “My stomach,” I explained. “It was like it was on fire. So I ducked into an alley and hid behind a dumpster.”
“That bad?”
“Yeah,” I smirked. “It didn’t take long before the rest of my body felt like it was on fire and the next thing I know I’m screaming and I can’t stop.” I chuckled slightly, I didn’t know why. Maybe it was the relief of finally being able to tell someone, to make it real in a way.
“I tried to be as quiet as I could, let everything just happen, you know,” I continued. “I felt my body change. I remember closing my eyes because I didn’t want to see what was happening and after that it all gets kind of hazy but I do remember blacking out not long after.” I paused and took a breath as I looked at Cordillia her face was white, her expression blank. I didn’t want to but I knew I had to continue, “This is where it gets crazy.” I sighed. “When the pain stopped and I opened my eyes, I wasn’t...” I stopped and searched for the right word to use. “I wasn’t human anymore, I was...” I shook my head. I didn’t know what to say.
“What?” she asked defensively. She didn’t believe me, it was written on her face and to be honest I hadn’t expected her to.
“I don’t know.” I searched myself for what to say, what would make it right but I came up empty with an exasperated sigh. “I could show you,” I offered. She looked up at me, her eyebrow raised as she shrugged.
“Really?” she mocked.
“I know you don’t believe me.”
“That is the understatement of the century.” She chuckled lightly. “Okay then, show me.” I stood from the chair and reluctantly and walked to the foot of the bed, the only open space that my tiny room had to offer. I didn’t know how to do this, if it was even a good idea but I had to do something. She watched on as I took off my shirt and tossed it onto the bed, looking away from her as she stared up at me, her lips twisted in a mocking grin.
“Promise me you won’t run.”
“Sure.” She chuckled as I readied myself. I closed my eyes and took a deep breath, concentrating on what it was I needed to do. It took longer than expected and I could hear her sigh impatiently from the bed as I focused everything I had on the task at hand.
My body began to burn and I could feel the change taking over as the same searing pain ripped through me, dropping me to my knees. I closed my eyes tight and let it take over, trying the best I could not to scream as my bones began to shift and change under my skin. I could hear Cordillia stifle her own cries from somewhere far away as I opened my eyes and watched as thick patches of gray fur began to sprout over my mangled and misshapen arm.
There are no words for the feeling that washed over me as writhed and growled on the carpet, no real way for me to describe the amount of pain that ripped through me as my body changed in ways it was never meant to. It wasn’t long after that I felt a sweet wave of relief wash over me and I was able to breathe, able to steady myself. I looked up and it took a moment before my eyes could really adjust but as I did, I saw Cordillia’s scared figure as she pressed herself tight against the wall behind the bed as far away from me as she could get. I stood my ground, my eyes lowered as I waited and hoped for any sign that she was okay.
“What the....” she mouthed as she stared at me in disbelief, her breath labored and I could hear her heart racing in her chest from where I sat. “You, you weren’t lying.” She began looking around the room frantically. “I thought you were bullshitting me but you weren’t you were telling the truth...” I closed my eyes and allowed myself to phase back, hoping that it would make it easier for her if she didn’t have to look at me that way. “What the hell are you?” she snapped. I popped
my neck loudly and sat down on the floor at the foot of the bed.
Wolves among men Page 2
