by MJ Haag
Mr. Crow turned to Bryn who stared at me with her mouth open.
“Mrs. Rouflyn, please take a tray to Lord Ruhall.”
She nodded and started preparing a tray. I watched her for a moment, knowing Alec would only become more impossible when he saw Bryn.
“Mr. Crow,” I said, “how many pitchers do we have?”
“Several, Miss Hotvel.”
“Good. Each room needs a full pitcher of water. When we run out of pitchers, use buckets just inside the doors.”
“I will see to it myself,” he said with a bow before he left the room.
I left the kitchen and tried to decide where Father might be. Most likely the library, the very place I did not want to go. Hoping Alec still changed, I cautiously hurried through the halls and paused outside the library door. When I peeked inside, I found Father reclined on the lounge, comfortably reading a book.
“With respect, you’re not so old as to be taxed enough to warrant an afternoon nap,” I said, entering the room. “Why did you abandon me? Twice now.”
“Abandon? Never. I trust Alec to keep within the boundaries you’ve established with him.”
I snorted. I didn’t even trust Alec to keep within the boundaries.
“Bini, you’ve upset him.”
“He has upset me.” I crossed my arms.
“He told me you’ve rejected his proposal more times than he has toes. His words.”
My arms fell to my sides. Counting the times he’d asked me as the beast, I had rejected him that many times. Father sat up and patted the lounge next to him.
“Why, Bini?”
I sighed and sat beside him.
“Because of so many reasons. What happened with the baker makes marriage a less than appealing state, and it broke my trust in Lord Ruhall. I also thought I didn’t know him; but lately, I’m wondering if I say no because I don’t know myself.”
He wrapped an arm around my shoulders and hugged me to his side to kiss my temple.
“Of all of us, you know yourself best. Trust your heart and your head to lead you to the right choice.”
Mr. Crow entered the room and discreetly set a bucket of water just within the door.
“Thank you, Mr. Crow,” I said to him.
He gave a single nod and left.
“Should I ask?” Father said.
“Probably not.”
A few moments later, Mr. Crow returned.
“There is a caller for Lord Ruhall. I’ve put her in the front sitting room.”
A caller? So soon?
“Please have Bryn provide refreshment and let Lord Ruhall know. I believe he’s in his room, changing.”
Mr. Crow didn’t move. I watched him glance at Father before focusing on me once more.
“It’s your sister, Blye.”
“Don’t bother with the refreshment.”
“Benella,” Father said chidingly.
“I understand you must love your children, but I will not encourage what she intends with pampered attention and sweet treats.”
Mr. Crow nodded and left the library. I stood, too.
“I should try to dissuade her. In Alec’s current mood, I don’t believe he will tolerate her attempted manipulations well.”
“I quite agree,” Father said after a weary sigh.
I left him on the lounge with his book and sought out my sister. I found her sitting serenely in a new dress, drowning in yards of pink lace.
“Hello, Blye.”
“Benella,” she said indifferently. “Is Lord Ruhall on his way?”
“I haven’t the slightest idea. Why are you here?”
“As if you don’t know. You’ve always been close mouthed, but how could you keep such news as Lord Ruhall’s need to wed to yourself? You weren’t hoping he’d marry you, were you?”
The heat of anger colored my cheeks as she continued in a patronizing tone.
“You’re not precisely the model of a lady. Pants, fishing, hunting, foraging...” She shook her head.
“You didn’t so disregard those skills when they kept you from starving. And what skills do you possess that you think might tempt him to forget your groveling pleas for mercy when he asked you to stay with him in exchange for Father’s life?”
She didn’t look the slightest bit put off by the reminder. Instead, she fluffed her skirt and smiled serenely.
“He’s no longer the beast.”
“He is the same, only changed in form. He’s forgotten nothing. Spare yourself humiliation or worse. Leave.”
A throat cleared behind me. I turned and saw Mr. Crow.
“Miss Hovtel,” he said, looking at Blye. “Lord Ruhall is unable to take callers today.”
“Will he be available tomorrow?” she asked, crossing the room to stand before Mr. Crow.
“He will be unavailable to all callers until after the feast. He begs you understand the time and attention it takes to coordinate such an affair.”
“Of course,” she said serenely.
“Might you want to see your father?” he asked.
She waved a hand negligibly.
“I haven’t the time. I must return to the shop.”
“I will see you out,” he said with a bow. Since he left her no choice, she followed him from the room.
With effort, I pushed my sister’s visit from my mind and focused on the problem at hand. Alec was angry with me; and if he hadn’t already realized I wasn’t in the library waiting for him, he would soon. Thinking quickly, I went in search of Egrit.
I survived the rest of the day by sending Mrs. Palant to help with the press while I helped Egrit dust. Egrit didn’t comment on the change. However, she did ask if I was well several times throughout the afternoon because I jumped at the slightest sounds.
By evening, I’d exhausted myself with worry over what trouble he might cause next.
When I went to my room, the nest of blankets remained as I’d left them. I carefully locked the door and undressed for bed. It didn’t take me long to fall asleep.
* * * *
Fingers trailed over my skin, tracing a burning path from navel to knee. I woke with an aching need that smothered any sense of worry. Turning my head, I found Alec beside me. I blinked at him, trying to focus. How had he gotten in?
His dark gaze held mine as his fingers barely missed the v of my legs. My breath hitched, and I almost forgot my question.
I closed my eyes and turned my head away to escape his focus. The pillow shifted under me, and I became aware that I lay on a bed, not the floor. I opened my eyes once more and saw his wardrobe. He’d moved me.
His lips suddenly skimmed along my neck. I sighed, and my eyes drifted closed. His fingers continued their languid strokes, tempting me, begging me to part my knees and give them access. I wanted nothing more than to give in to his seduction. My need almost robbed me of thought and will, as did his fingers and mouth.
I needed to deny him. Why? I couldn’t remember...
He nibbled his way from my neck to my shoulder. My skin tingled with fire and life. Then he licked my collarbone. He lifted his head and moved so his mouth hovered over my left breast. He exhaled, the hot air creating an ache. I knew what he intended, and I wanted it more than I wanted my next breath.
“You are mine,” he breathed against my skin. His fingers continued to dance along the v of my legs. His tongue brushed against my nipple then disappeared, leaving me unsatisfied. I whimpered and arched.
“Agree to marry me, and I will give you what you desire.”
The words chilled me as if a pitcher had doused me. Marriage. He needed to marry or be re-enchanted. I balled up my fist and swung at him.
“Manipulator. Beast,” I cried as my fist connected with his cheek. He grunted and grabbed both my hands. I pulled back hard and tumbled from the bed.
Tired and frustrated, I couldn’t prevent the tears that welled in my eyes.
“Why? Haven’t I been punished enough?”
“Punished?”
He sat up and looked down at me. “Do you really see my touch as punishment?”
“Do not twist my meaning. It’s not your touch but your cruel manipulations to gain your own ends. Stop this, Alec. I want sleep.”
“As do I,” he shouted at me.
“Then why are you awake touching me?”
“How else am I to get you to stay?”
The tears spilled over.
“That is the problem, Alec. You cannot force me to stay. You can only ask and leave the choice to me.”
His shoulders slumped, and his hopeless expression tugged at my heart.
“Please stay the night with me, Benella. I cannot sleep without you by my side.”
I considered him a long while. Saying yes would ease whatever madness gripped him now, but it would not ease my conscience. He would marry soon. Sleeping with me like this was wrong. Yet, his desperate expression and bloodshot eyes moved me to compassion.
“I want my nightshirt back. And my underclothes.”
“Yes,” he said quickly. He rose and retrieved them from the bottom of his wardrobe.
Once I had the shirt about me, I sat on the edge of the bed.
“Lie down,” I said.
He immediately obeyed but then pulled me down with him. He tucked me close to his chest and rested his chin on the top of my head.
I held still and waited for his breathing to slow. Once each exhale came in an even rhythm, I eased from his arms. He didn’t stir. I covered him with a spare blanket and quietly left his room.
* * * *
The next day looked as if it would play out no better than the prior day when I heard Alec pacing in the hall. He whirled at the sound of my door opening. I hesitated near the threshold, close to the pitcher of water Mr. Crow had considerately placed within.
“You left me,” he said with an angry scowl.
“It wasn’t my place to stay. I should not have been there to begin with.”
He opened his mouth to argue, and I stepped close to take his hands in mine. The action stopped the forthcoming rant. He gripped my hands firmly and watched me with mixed emotions.
“Alec, have patience. The feast is a mere five days from today. You might meet someone then.” He made a sound of disagreement. “Or perhaps officially announce your intent to wed. If you can just hold yourself for a few more days, your life might unexpectedly change for the better.”
“I don’t want my life to change unexpectedly. I want you.”
He pulled his hands from mine and left me in the hallway.
For a brief moment, I considered finding Egrit to see if she would consider helping with the press. Then, I slowly followed in Alec’s wake. Hiding from him did no good. Avoiding him made things worse. Perhaps if I did the opposite, things would then improve.
We worked together throughout the morning. He watched me continually and used any opportunity to touch me. When he invited me to join him in the library for the midday meal, I accepted after he also invited Father.
The meal didn’t last long. As soon as Alec finished his portion, he stood and began pacing just behind my chair. I felt as if the beast was back, waiting to pounce. I took my last bite and set my plate back upon the tray. Before I could swallow, Father quickly excused himself to return the tray to the kitchen.
The sound of Alec’s pacing stopped. I stood and turned. With a determined glint in his eyes, he waited, poised just behind my chair. Instead of finding an excuse to leave, I stayed where I was. He seemed to calm when he saw I wasn’t about to bolt.
“Thank you for a lovely meal,” I said softly.
He exhaled slowly. If he still had fur, I had no doubt I would have witnessed his hackles lowering.
“Will you read to me after dinner?” he asked.
“Yes, if you will tell me how you entered my room last night.”
“So you can bar me from entering?” he asked with a scowl.
“I won’t need to bar you if I have your word that I will remain in my room all night tonight and have no cause to lock my door.”
He considered me for a moment then reached into his pocket. He withdrew a key and handed it to me.
“I asked Phillip for the master key. I had to wait half the night for him to leave his post outside your door.” The petulant way he said it almost made me smile.
“Mr. Crow is a good man. I’ll return it and let him know he need not worry tonight?” I ended it as a question because I wanted Alec’s agreement. When he nodded, I smiled. “Then, I will read to you for as long as you like.”
* * * *
After dinner, Alec brought me a tome of enormous proportions, and I read until my voice objected. The whole while, he sat on the floor and ran his fingers through my hair. When I closed the book, he stood and offered me his arm.
We walked together to our rooms, and he bade me goodnight at my door. His civility eased my mind enough that I kept my promise and did not turn the lock.
In the morning, the warm place in the blankets beside me told a truth. He’d come to me, and slept beside me, but had left me unmolested.
The next three days followed a similar pattern. If I behaved in an accommodating manner, he adhered to the boundaries I’d set, with the exception of sleeping in my room. He continued to let himself in, though I had asked him to cease.
In those three days, the stacked barrels of fresh cider lined one full wall of the cellar, and the men completed the harvest of the red apples. Mr. Crow paid the smiths their due and let them know there was no further work for them. If they were smart, they would hold tight to their coin.
Bryn and Kara continued to cook and prepare everything brought to them. Cloth-covered, wooden platters of smoked fish crowded the cellar on every spare surface. Kara even managed to turn a large amount of herbed soft cheese from the goat milk that I’d neglected to take to the Water the week prior.
The day before the feast, we finished pressing the remaining apples early in the morning while Bryn and Kara started the meat pies.
Everything was progressing nicely, and I felt a sense of calm until midday.
Alec, Father, and I were in the library, eating and discussing last minute details when Mr. Crow interrupted us.
“Lord Ruhall, a guest for the feast has arrived early. Egrit is showing her to a guest room...near her father’s.”
Blye. Mr. Crow and I shared a look before I glanced at Alec.
“Perhaps you should lock your door tonight,” I said.
Alec ignored me and turned to Phillip.
“Let Kara know we’ll eat in the dining room tonight with our guest. Nothing formal, just a change in scene.”
Mr. Crow nodded and left.
“I’ll take the tray to the kitchen,” I said, standing. “Alec, will you help me in the ballroom? We should start moving the tables and chairs in.”
He seemed pleased that I’d asked him and nodded.
We met a few minutes later in the ballroom. Alec had brought Swiftly with him to help. I directed them where to place the food and drink tables, then helped bring in some of the lighter chairs for the older guests like the candle maker.
Less than an hour had passed when Mr. Crow found us again.
“Miss Hovtel, there is someone here to see you. She gave the name Ila.”
I was elated she’d decided to come early.
“Thank you, Mr. Crow.” I turned to glance at the tables. “Can you bring Kara in here to see if this will be enough room for the food? I’d like to set it all out right away tomorrow so everyone can join in the feast.”
He nodded, and I left him in the ballroom so quickly that he had to call after me.
“She is in the sitting room, Miss.”
I waved to show I’d heard and kept going. I desperately needed a friendly face and an escape from my troubled thoughts. I hoped Ila would provide both.
Ila didn’t sit on a chair as Blye had but wandered around the room to study interesting objects here and there. When she heard me enter, she turned with
a hesitant smile.
“Ila, I’m so happy you’re here. Will you be staying the night?”
I hugged her warmly when I reached her, and after a slight hesitation, she hugged me in return.
“I’m glad you’re happy to see me,” she said. “I wasn’t certain.”
“Nonsense. I’m delighted. And I would like you to stay. Blye is here early as well, and I would enjoy a companion who doesn’t ignore me.”
Ila laughed, a husky sound and a bittersweet reminder of our shared past, as she pulled back from our embrace.
“I will stay, then, and protect you as I am able.” She turned and gestured to a small trunk just inside the door. “I brought your dress.”
It was hard to keep the joy on my face. The extravagance of having a formal dress still annoyed me. Even my serviceable dresses annoyed me at times. What would I do with a lace-ridden dress? Owning something that could only be worn once, maybe twice, made little sense.
“Don’t look so cornered,” Ila said. “Through your visits, I’ve grown to know you. I think you’ll be happy with what I’ve brought. Would you like to see it?”
“I apologize if I looked unappreciative, I’m nothing but grateful. Yes, please do show me.”
Ila moved to the trunk and opened it. With her back to me, she lifted something from within, shook it out, then turned. The cream dress adorned with golden and burgundy threads stunned me. No lace trimmed the square neckline; the parallel patterns of the threads were enough of an adornment. The pattern continued down the length of the skirt as well. From a distance, it would appear a solid cream color. Only on closer inspection would someone realize the beauty of the material. The only lace on the creation hung from the sleeves that stopped at the elbow.
“It’s beautiful,” I said, reaching out to touch it. The fine, thin material reminded me of the dress I’d worn to my sister’s wedding.
“There is an underskirt if you want more volume, or you can wear it without.”
“I cannot wait to try it on,” I said with honesty.
“Not until tomorrow.” She smiled at me, then turned to tuck it into the trunk once more.
“You’re sure it will fit?”
“Yes. I have no doubt.”
After asking Mr. Crow for a tray, Ila and I enjoyed a quiet afternoon talking. Before dinner, I showed her to her room then walked with her to the dining room where we found Alec, Father, and Blye already seated.
