by Maisey Yates
Success had been his antidote to depression. He’d simply never stopped, even when it wasn’t necessary to his survival to keep climbing the ladder.
He saw elements of that in Madeline. She always seemed to have her armor on. And it bothered him that it mattered at all.
There was a soft knock on his office door.
“Come in.”
He looked up and saw Madeline slipping in, looking thoroughly respectable in a tight knee-length skirt and a sweater. So respectable all he could think of was making her look a bit more disreputable.
They hadn’t made love since they’d left Luxembourg four days earlier and he was surprised at how much he missed her touch. He’d gone for very long periods of time without sex. Two years after losing Paulina. But for some reason, these four days had seemed like an eternity.
He didn’t want to examine why that was. Why he responded to her with such intensity.
“We have a slight problem with the venue for the Paris exhibition.”
“Do we?” Aleksei leaned back in his chair and tried to focus his mind on the task at hand, and not on Madeline’s gorgeous body. On how much he would like to undo the top button on her prim little sweater…
“Yes. They’re double booked. And they want one of us to shuffle the time.”
He leaned forward and put his hands on his desk. “The other event can shuffle.”
“That’s what I said.”
“And?”
“And they gave me a very non-committal answer. Said I would have to take it up with Oracle. That would be the company that is also booked for Le Grande ballroom on the same date we have Le Grande ballroom booked.”
“I figured as much,” he said wryly, pressing his palms firmly on the desk and standing. “What’s the number?”
She handed him her cellphone and indicated her last outgoing call. He highlighted the number and pressed Send.
What followed was a flurry of French that Madeline couldn’t understand. She spoke a little bit of French, but it was about as good as her Italian. Which wasn’t very good, and certainly not proficient enough to engage in serious business negotiations.
When Aleksei hung up he handed her the phone again, his fingers brushing hers, little rivulets of pleasure traveling up her arm and through her body. She could have purred, it felt so good.
And, for the moment, she wasn’t going to try and fight the attraction between them. They hadn’t had a chance to be together since the exhibition in Luxembourg, but she was still in full embrace the fling mode.
“Success?” she asked, putting her phone back in her pocket.
“Of course.”
Of course. Spoken like a man who never expected to be told no. A man who had complete control over every aspect of his life and was completely confident in that.
Except he hadn’t always had control. Her heart ached when she thought of his wife, of the pain he’d been through. It disturbed her, just how much it weighed on her.
She smiled. “Of course.”
He rounded his desk and took her in his arms. He didn’t kiss her, not immediately. He simply rested his head on her hair, his hands stroking her back, warm and comforting. She inhaled his scent, so familiar, so exciting.
When he did kiss her, he put his thumb and forefinger on her chin and tilted her face up, pressing his lips lightly against hers.
“I’ve missed you,” he said.
“Me too.” The words were a whisper. An admission that was difficult for her to make, both to him and to herself.
“I need you tonight,” he said roughly, kissing her again, this time with very little of the restraint he’d shown the first time.
“Yes,” she said, between kisses.
“I have a suite booked at the Hotel Del Sol.”
Her heart sank into her stomach. She tried, she tried really hard, to shake off the nausea that gripped her. Aleksei didn’t have a wife at home he was hiding from her, and what had she expected? That he would invite her back to his Milan apartment? Like she would invite him to hers? She wouldn’t. It would be bringing him into her space, and that just didn’t seem like something people involved in a purely sexual relationship would do.
It didn’t help. She was afraid she would be sick.
“I… Maybe not tonight,” she said, her voice strangled.
She noticed a muscle tick in his jaw and he loosened his hold on her. Pulled away. “A suite doesn’t suit you, Madeline? Or is the hotel simply not grand enough?”
“Stop it, Aleksei, I’ve never behaved that way, and you know it.”
Hurt, hurt that had nothing to do with him, an old wound she still carried because of her own stupidity, fueled her anger at him.
He looked away. “If you’re busy, you’re busy.”
“I am,” she said stiffly.
“See you tomorrow, Madeline.” He went back to the other side of his desk and sat, turning his attention to the computer monitor.
Dismissed. He’d dismissed her. That was loud and clear.
And she was the one who had said no, so what right did she have to be angry and hurt? She gritted her teeth and stalked out of his office.
It didn’t matter if she had no right to be angry and hurt. She was.
No matter how much she didn’t want to be, she was.
Aleksei didn’t beg for women to come to him. They just came to him. That was his experience in life, even before he’d had money. It had only been more frequent since he’d made his first million.
But he was on the verge of begging. His body was unfulfilled and sleep eluded him. He had been cold to Madeline, and then, in the end, he had seen pain in her eyes, pain that went deeper than their simple argument.
And he had turned away. Because he hadn’t signed on for her pain. And now it was eating at him from the inside out.
That and the arousal that was coursing through him.
His finger hovered over the speed dial he had programmed in his phone for her.
A picture of her, naked with her black gown pooled at her feet, flashed into his mind, mingled with the image of her standing in his office, devastation in her blue eyes.
He dialed. Pride be damned.
“Hello?” She sounded as though she’d been sleeping. Or crying. His stomach twisted at the thought. Causing Madeline pain was not something he wanted any part in.
“Maddy.”
“Aleksei,” she said, her voice guarded. “It’s past eleven.”
“I know. Will you come to my apartment? It’s above the studio.”
“I…yes.”
“Do you need me to send a car?”
He heard rustling, probably covers, in the background. “No. I can drive. I’ll be there in ten minutes.”
It was a long ten minutes. When he heard the buzzer, he let her in quickly, and when she came to his apartment door he already had it open for her.
He pulled her to him, kissed her. Thoroughly. She wrapped her arms around his neck and pressed her sweet body against his.
“Come in,” he said.
She complied and he closed the door behind her. He was short on patience. He’d needed her hours ago, and he needed her even more now.
“The living area isn’t very nice,” he said, taking her by the hand. “I’ll show you my bedroom.”
A smile spread across her face, her eyes crinkling in the way they did when she was truly happy. She laughed. “Smooth, Aleksei.”
“But it worked, right?”
Her smile broadened. “Of course.”
He led her across the vast, open living area and to the double doors that partitioned his bedroom from the rest of the apartment. He didn’t usually bring women to any of his personal residences. Hotels were his first choice. And yet he didn’t feel as though Madeline was invading. It didn’t feel like an imposition to have her.
Of course, for all the time he spent in Milan it might as well be a hotel.
“I like this,” she said, looking around his bedroom. “Very manl
y.”
He laughed. “Is it? I paid someone to decorate it.”
She smiled and took her jacket off, tossing it on the chair that was positioned near his bed. “Well, they did a good job. The bed is certainly inviting. Though that may be the company, rather than the silky black bedspread. Although, the bedspread helps.”
He pulled her into his arms, forked his fingers in that glossy dark hair and kissed her. Kissed her with all of the hunger that was threatening to consume him.
She kissed him back, her hands cupping his face, her soft thumbs caressing his jawline. He lowered her onto the bed and she gave a little shriek when her back hit the mattress. He chuckled and kissed her neck.
“Oh, yes, you’re very smooth,” she said, wrapping her arms around his neck and drawing her thighs up, parting them so he could settle between them.
He couldn’t remember the last time he’d laughed with a woman. The last time sex had felt personal. The last time it had mattered who it was with.
Yes, he could. The last time he’d been with Maddy.
And then thought was impossible to think, because she was pulling his T-shirt over his head and throwing it aside, putting her hands on his chest, exploring him. Torturing him.
“Milaya moya, you’re lethal,” he said, taking her top and tugging it over her head, revealing her hot pink bra and perfect cleavage.
He made quick work of the bra and exposed her gorgeous breasts to his gaze. No dessert had ever been more tempting.
“What does that mean?” she asked, voice breathy as he feathered kisses over the tops of her breasts.
“It means my sweet,” he said, running his tongue over one of her perky pink nipples. “And you are very, very sweet.”
He tugged her jeans off, taking her panties with them and leaving her completely naked. Then he turned his attention back to her breasts. She arched beneath him and her sweet sounds of pleasure gratified him in ways he hadn’t imagined were possible. It was always important to him to make sure his partner enjoyed being with him, but it had never felt as essential to his own enjoyment as it did now.
He ran his hands over her body, drew away slightly so he could admire her. Pale skin, full breasts and a flat stomach. She was so beautiful. So perfect.
Desire roared through him. He kissed her stomach, her skin so soft and tender. She wiggled beneath him, forked her fingers through his hair as he began moving his exploration to lower territory.
He loved the taste of her, loved the sounds she made when he caressed her clitoris with the flat of his tongue.
She tugged on his shoulders slightly. “Now,” she said. “Please. I need you now.”
He stood and took his wallet out of his pocket and set in on the bed before shucking his jeans and underwear and consigning them to the floor with the rest of the clothes.
He opened his wallet and pulled out a condom.
“I’ve got it,” she said, getting up on her knees and taking the packet from his hand.
She opened it and rolled it onto his length. She wasn’t overly experienced. He’d realized that the last time they were together. But her confidence along with her obvious desire more than made up for it. And the fact that she tackled the condom application slowly only made it an even sweeter torture.
He lowered himself over her, kissed her and she lay back, parting her thighs for him. He tested her, felt how ready she was before thrusting into her in one motion.
“Oh, yes,” she sighed, gripping his shoulders, her nails digging into his skin. The slight pain was just enough to help offset the blinding pleasure, enough to keep him from ending things much too quickly.
She locked her legs around his calves, her head thrown back in obvious pleasure. He kissed her neck, her collarbone, her lips, as he established a rhythm that drove them both to the edge.
She arched beneath him, panting in his ear, her sounds of pleasure the thing that pushed him over, forced him to give up and embrace the hot rush of his orgasm. She followed, her internal muscles clenching tight around him, the pleasure more intense than anything he’d experienced before.
He rolled to the side and pulled her to him. She cuddled against him, her breath hot against his chest.
“I’m sorry about before,” she said quietly, her words muffled.
“I hurt you, Maddy. I’m not proud of that, even if I don’t know the reason why you were hurt.”
She sucked in a sharp breath. “It…it wasn’t really your fault. There’s no reason you should know why.”
He clenched his teeth. Part of him wanted to press for more. The other part wanted to kiss her again, to make it up to her in the best way he could think of. He didn’t do pillow talk. Didn’t mine his lovers for information.
“Who hurt you?” He tightened his grip on her. And he realized he wanted to know. He wanted to know so he could kill whoever it was that had put that look in Maddy’s eyes. And he wanted to be sure he wasn’t the man who had put it there.
She laughed shakily and rolled away from him. “That’s a loaded question.”
He was caught between the desire to tell her that her secrets were hers to keep, and the need to know more. The need to try and slay her dragons.
He turned so that he was on his side, facing her. “That’s okay.”
“I guess we can start with my parents,” she said, not looking at him. “They just didn’t… They weren’t really all that into kids, and I was a late-in-life surprise. They had already raised my brother, and they didn’t really want… I’m fifteen years younger than Gage. They were done by then.”
Aleksei’s heart squeezed tight. He shouldn’t have asked. What could he do to soothe her pain? Nothing. He had nothing to give. And in Maddy, in this moment, he sensed so much need. So much need he would be unable to meet.
“Anyway, when I was ten they went on a trip…I don’t even know what it was for. But they’d let my nanny go and the new one hadn’t arrived. I was alone for three days with no food. Not because there was no money. There was lots of money. They just…forgot. I called Gage and he came and got me. I never went back to that house.”
There was no pain in her voice, no emotion at all. It was something he knew well. That complete separation from all feelings. Because the other option was to be consumed by misery. And it was obvious neither of them had allowed that. They had moved on. They had chased success and found it rather than embracing destruction.
“Gage made things nice for me,” she continued, her voice steady. “He even made sure I went to prom. I don’t know if he paid my date to take me, or if it was a dare, but at least I went. I was… I had a hard time with friends and boys because I just didn’t…think very much of myself, for obvious reasons. I mean, if your parents don’t want you it’s hard to believe anyone will. And then I met William.”
Adrenaline spiked through Aleksei’s system. He knew, just by the way she said the other man’s name, that he was going to be fighting the urge to commit a murder by the end of the story.
“He was my boss when I graduated from college. I got an internship. He was really nice to me, always complimenting me and telling me I was beautiful. When he started making advances I was really flattered…and it was so nice to have someone just…want me. No one else had ever…wanted me.”
She turned away from him. “I was so stupid, Aleksei. I just wanted to be loved. I was so desperate for it. My parents wouldn’t give it to me, and this man was…he was older and powerful and handsome and he said he loved me.”
“A lot of young girls make that mistake,” Aleksei said, voice rough.
Madeline sat up, letting the covers fall to her waist. “Yes, a lot of girls throw their virginity away on men who profess love but are just using them, I know that. But not a lot of girls break up marriages. I did. And it was in the papers, headline news, because his wife was this semi-famous model and actress. And for a few months I got to be infamous.”
“He was married?” Dark rage roiled in his gut. He marveled at the fact tha
t only moments ago he’d considered himself a man with complete dominion over his emotions. That control was gone. If he ever met that man in person…he could not be responsible for what he would do to him.
“I didn’t know he was married. I don’t think I did anyway. Sometimes I wonder now if I just let myself be ignorant. I didn’t talk to the other employees. I didn’t tell anyone about William and me. I didn’t question him when he took me to hotels and then left right…after. That’s my deep dark secret. Although, if you’d looked me up on Google, you might have found it. Even though it’s been five years.”
Aleksei looked at her, at her still, tense body. She was still waiting for censure, for him to side with the press.
“It doesn’t matter what you knew or didn’t know, Maddy.” Aleksei sat up and moved toward her. “A man is responsible for keeping his own marriage vows. I never strayed when I was married. I loved my wife, and no one could have enticed me to betray the promises I made to her.”
“But I…” Her expression was bleak. “I just should have…I should have made a better choice.”
“He took advantage of you. I cannot respect a man who preys on anyone’s weaknesses, especially not those of a vulnerable girl. He is not worthy to call himself a man.”
She looked down, dark lashes fanning over high cheekbones. “No one else saw it that way. I’ve never seen it that way. The headlines were right. I’m a home-wrecker.”
“The press loves scandal, loves a villain. But don’t let them decide how you see yourself. Your boss, he was the home-wrecker.”
Maddy drew her knees up to her chest. Her heart was racing, her hands shaking. She’d never told anyone the full story of her life. Not about her parents. Not about William. But it had all come pouring out of her now. Every ugly truth. And Aleksei wasn’t looking at her in disgust. His dark gaze was almost tender. She couldn’t understand it. Any of it.
As much as it had hurt to see the headlines, it had felt like penance. It had felt necessary. She had embraced the guilt, because it had helped to block out the pain of her broken heart.
“Do you know the worst thing?” she asked, almost desperate for Aleksei to condemn her, to confirm her guilt. “He came to me, after the story broke about the affair. He said he loved me. He said he wanted me to stay with him.” She felt a tear slide down her cheek, but she ignored it. “I was tempted. I didn’t want to lose him. I didn’t want to lose those feelings. He told me how beautiful I was and how special…I think I loved that more than I ever loved him.”
