It had something to do with Eric, she was certain of it.
Daniel had said Curtis was out searching the grounds, or something like
that-Had he spotted Eric?
What would they do to him if they caught him?
Daniel didn’t answer, but moved quickly through the heavy wooden
door.
As he did, she saw the guard posted outside it, and her heart raced all
the faster.
She couldn’t get out to try to warn Eric that they were out for
blood.
My God, what if they got to him?
The door closed and she paced the room, battling the dizziness that
tried to return sporadically.
She shut her eyes and tried to call out to Eric as she’d done before,
with her mind.
Eric, if you ‘re out there, be careful!
Daniel and Curt-Her thoughts came to a halt as a chill breeze rushed
over her body, and a familiar voice spoke softly.
“Are presently being led a merry chase by Roland, all in order to clear
them out of here.
” As her eyes flew open, he swung his legs over the windowsill, landing
gracefully on the floor.
He stood still for a moment, as if waiting for her permission to come
any closer.
Tamara raced toward him and threw herself into his arms.
“Eric!”
His arms around her seemed hesitant, and then he pushed her from him
and eased her back into the bed.
His face, she now noted, was a study in misery.
Lines were etched deep between his brows and on both sides of his
mouth.
His eyes were moist and searching.
He dropped to one knee beside the bed, and his voice thickened with
every word he uttered.
“Sweet Tamara, I never meant… My God, I never meant to bring you to
this.
I swear it to you.
If I’d known—but I should have known, shouldn’t I?
I should never have done what I did.
” He choked on the words and a single tear slipped slowly down his
face.
Her heart wrenched as she reached out to touch it, absorbing it into
her fingertips.
“Don’t think what you’re thinking, Eric. Not even for a minute. This
was an accident, nothing more.”
His gaze met hers, and she saw the doubt there.
“Look into my mind, since you’re so talented at that sort of thing.
Better yet, look into my heart. How could you think I’d want to leave
you?”
She felt him doing just what she’d suggested, and as he probed her mind
she explained what she’d done.
“I knew I wouldn’t close my eyes all night, and I had to go to work, or
else Daniel would know something was wrong. I sipped the cognac, but
it didn’t help. A bit later I tried the sleeping pills that have been
sitting in my cabinet for over a month. I’d taken them before without
any ill effects at all. The problem was that I wasn’t thinking
clearly, and didn’t stop to consider the consequences of mixing them
with alcohol. That’s all, Eric.
I promise, that’s all.
” He gathered her into his arms and she felt the shuddering breath he
released as it bathed her neck.
“I thought you’d awakened to regret having given yourself to me. If
ever you do, Tamara, you must tell me. I will not be the cause of your
despair.
I will leave you now, if you tell me to do so.”
Her arms clenched tighter and she whispered,
“No.
Don’t leave me, Eric.
Don’t.
” Frowning with a sense of deja vu so strong it made her lightheaded
she pulled away from him. ” My God, I’ve said that to you before.
In a hospital bed just like this one.
I begged you not to leave me.
but you did.
” He nodded, his eyes studying her carefully.
“I honestly thought it best for you.
I was wrong.
I won’t make that mistake again.
If you ordered me to stay away from you, I’d never go so far as I did
then.
You’d have my protection.
I’d watch over you, as I should have done before.
St.
Claire never would have got his hands on you if I’d been wiser then.
” “Then it was when I had the accident.
That was when I knew you?
All these memories and familiarity stem from the time I was six years
old?
” “Yes.
It is coming back to you now.
Soon the rest will, as well, and you will understand better.
” She nodded, wishing she understood now.
She wouldn’t press him on it, though.
He shouldn’t be here.
It wasn’t safe.
“Eric, I had to tell Daniel it wasn’t you who attacked and bruised me,
but I couldn’t very well hide the marks on my throat.”
His eyes moved to that spot and she felt their heat.
An answering warmth spread within her, but she forced herself to ignore
it.
“I told him that I went to you willingly, that you forced nothing on
me.
He still insists you have me under some kind of spell, though. Eric,
he’s furious. It isn’t a good idea for you to be here.”
His lips thinned, and he studied her for a long moment.
“You love this man, and I’ve tried to restrain myself from speaking
against him, for your sake, Tamara. Tonight I cannot. It is better to
risk your anger than to allow you to continue in your blind trust of
him. It is no more safe for you to remain than it is for me.
Especially now that he knows of our intimacy.”
She stroked his face lovingly.
“Old habits die hard. He’s so used to thinking the worst of you, he
can’t do otherwise, and I think you have the same problem. Daniel
loves me, Eric.”
He covered her hand with his own, closed his eyes and turned his face
to press his lips to her palm.
“It kills me to hurt you, Tamara. The traits I explained to you, the
ones that make you different from other humans” — “The Belladonna
antigen and the common ancestor?”
He nodded.
“St. Claire knew of them even then.”
She frowned at him, blinking.
“He did? But why hasn’t he ever told me?”
Eric held her hand in his own.
“Tamara, there is a good possibility that he only took you in because
he knew you were one of the Chosen. He knew of your connection to us,
and he knew that as long as he had you, one of us might come near
enough to be captured.”
“Captured?”
She searched his face, his mind, as he spoke, but she saw no sign that
he was lying to her.
“For… what?”
His lips parted, but closed again.
He shook his head.
“I am afraid for you,” he told her.
“Believe me that is my only motive for telling you these things.”
She shook her head, blinking as hot tears pooled in her eyes.
“I know you mean it, you believe all of this… but it’s wrong. You’re
wrong. Daniel loves me like his own daughter.”
She lowered her gaze and shook her head.
“He has to. He’s the only family I’ve had for all these years. If all
of that was a lie—no. You’re wrong.”
Eric sighed, but nodded.
“I will not press the matter.
But Tamara, he is not the only family you have any longer.
You have me.
No matter what else might happen, you always will.
Do you believe me?
” She nodded in return, but her eyes didn’t focus.
She was searching her mind, realizing that Daniel must’ve known Eric
had visited her in the hospital all those years ago.
It was the only explanation for his overprotective behavior now.
Something niggled at her mind, and she squinted hard, trying to
remember.
“Eric, when I came around earlier, they were saying something about
a… a tranquilizer….”
She heard their voices replay in her mind, and had the confirmation
she’d dreaded.
He’ll come to her, just like before.
And then Daniel.
We
“II be ready.
Get the tranquilizer and meet me back here.
Her stomach clenched.
“No tranquilizer known has any effect on vampires, Tamara.
” She shook her head hard.
“I got the feeling this was something new, something Curt’s been
working on.”
She met his gaze then, her fear for him overcoming her own lingering
doubts.
“I know I’m safe with them, Eric, but as things stand, .
you aren’t.
Please leave before they come back.
” “I won’t cower in fear of them” — “But Roland might not be safe,
either.
If there is some kind of drug, and he lets them get too close…”
He frowned then, and nodded.
“I’ll go, then—this time.”
Once again he pulled her upper body to him, and kissed her neck, then
the hollow just below her ear, then the ear itself.
“I find it unbearable to leave you, though.”
She closed her eyes and let her head fall back to give his mouth better
access.
The sensations he sent through her body would overwhelm her common
sense in a few seconds.
Her fingers tangled in his hair, and her breath caught in her throat.
His lips kissed a path to hers, and then he feasted on her mouth and
her tongue as if it were to be his last meal.
When he lifted himself from her she clung.
She pressed wet lips to his ear.
“I wish you could stay. I want you so much it hurts.”
She felt him tremble in response to her words and her touch.
“It is too soon—you’ve been through so much.”
Gently he pushed her until she lay amid the pillows.
“I will leave you, but not to go far. If anyone tries to harm you,
call to me. You know I will hear you.”
“I know.”
He left the way he’d come, and Tamara thought it felt as if he’d taken
a pan of her with him.
CHAPTER ELEVEN Ohe closed the window, returned to her bed and feigned
sleep, though she was wide awake and jittery with restlessness.
Daniel returned a few minutes after Eric had left her, and took a seat
near the window.
Tamara ignored him.
She wasn’t yet ready for a confrontation, but she knew one had to
come.
She needed to hear from his own lips that the things Eric suspected
were wrong.
Dawn approached and Tamara couldn’t avoid sleep’s clinging vines.
They gradually encircled her and tugged her down into slumber.
When her eyes flew wide only a moment later, it was to see the final
splash of the sun’s orange light slowly receding from the sky.
Daniel’s chair was empty.
She waited, lying still and lazy as the life seemed to filter back into
her body.
Amazing that she’d slept all day two days running now, so deeply she
hadn’t been aware of the time ticking past.
Refreshed and energized, she flung the covers back and started opening
drawers and closet doors in search of her clothes.
She’d had enough of this confinement.
The only clothing she found were her nightgown and her long hounds
tooth-check coat.
She sighed relief that her boots rested on the closet floor.
There was no guard now.
She guessed Daniel assumed she’d only needed guarding after sundown.
She caused quite a stir when she announced to the nurses at the crowded
desk in the main corridor that she was checking herself out.
Forms needed to be signed and the doctor notified.
She couldn’t just leave.
She coolly requested that whatever forms needed signing be handed over
at once.
She’d already phoned for a cab, and fully intended to be ready when it
arrived.
Less than half an hour later she marched through the imposing front
door of the neglected house she’d called home for the past twenty
years.
Daniel stood just beyond the door, pulling his coat on.
He looked up, surprised to see her.
His smile died slowly when she didn’t return it.
“We need to talk” was all she said in greeting.
His faded cornflower eyes turned away from her probing dark ones.
He nodded, and exhaled slowly.
“I left a cabby waiting outside. I’ll just go get my purse, and “
“I’ll take care of it.”
Daniel moved past her and out the door before she could argue the
point.
She heard the vehicle move away, its tires crunching over the packed
snow on the road.
Daniel returned a moment later.
He removed his coat, draped it on a rather wobbly coat tree and gently
helped her out of hers.
She’d already toed off her boots.
“You ought to go upstairs and lie down. Tam. We can talk in your
room.”
She faced him squarely.
“Is there a DPI guard outside my door?” His gaze dropped so fast there
was no doubting his surge of guilt. ” Why was I under guard, Daniel?
” He sighed, his shoulders slumping.
“I won’t lie to you.
I was afraid Marquand would try to get to you there.
” “Because he came to me once before in a hospital?”
Daniel’s head snapped up, eyes widening.
“You you remember?” She turned from him, stalking though the foyer and
into the huge living room. She knew he followed. Her long, quick
stride and stiff spine showed her anger almost as well as her words and
tone of voice.
She faced him again. “No, Daniel. As a matter of fact, I don’t
remember.
For the past g few months I’ve been slowly, systematically losing my|
mind because I can’t remember. I’m trying…”
Her throat| threatened to close off, and she bit her lips, swallowed|
twice and forced herself to go on.
“You’ve known about | this this link between Marquand and me all along,
though, j haven’t you? For God’s sake, Daniel, how could you keep |
something like this from me?”
a His brows lifted, creasing his forehead.
“Tam, I was only | doing what I thought was best for you.<
br />
Trying to protect j you ” I ” By watching me go insane?
My God, the nightmares, | the sleeplessness you had to know it all
revolved around Eric.
You knew, and you never said a word.
” | ” You were in a fragile state of mind!
I couldn’t say ] anything to make it worse.
” “Of course not. You couldn’t say anything to ease my fears, either,
could you, Daniel? Not the way Eric did. You couldn’t simply tell me
that it was all right, that I wasn’t going crazy that there was a
reason for all I was going through and that I’d understand it as soon
as my mind was ready to let me remember. You couldn’t comfort me that
way, could you?”
Daniel couldn’t have looked more shocked if she’d slapped him.
“He ” “But you didn’t want me to remember, did you, Daniel?
Because you knew.
You knew how close Eric and I had become, and you knew he’d come to me
some day.
All these years you’ve been waiting, watching.
” She waited for a furious denial, but saw only remorse in Daniel’s
leathery face.
She had to press it further.
She had to ask the final question, though she dreaded hearing the
answer.
“Is that why you took me in all those years ago, Daniel? Was I just
the perfect bait to lure him to you?”
For a long time he didn’t answer.
When Tamara turned away from him in disgust, his soft hand shot out to
grip her arm and turn her back toward him.
“I was blind with ambition twenty years ago. Tam. There was nothing
in my life except my work. I’d have done anything to get to
Marquand.-then. But not now.”
His hand fell from her arm, and he paced away from her slowly, eyes on
his feet, but not seeing.
“I grew to love you, sweetheart. How could I not? And it wasn’t very
long at all until I stopped looking forward to the day he’d come back.
I started fearing it. I was terrified he’d come and take you away from
me.”
She held the tears in check.
She wasn’t certain where she got the strength to do it.
“My entire life has been a lie.
From the second you came to my hospital room you were enacting a cold,
calculated plot.
” She shook her head.
“What were you going to do with Eric when you caught him?”
There was no remorse in his eyes when he faced her this time.
Only the frigid gleam of hatred.
“Don’t pity him, Tam. He’s no better than an animal—a rabid wolf who
has to be stopped before he can spread his disease. Oh, I had big
At Twilight Page 18
