by Allie Burns
The blue-edged rim of the china chamber pot lurking in the shadows under the bed turned Natalie’s stomach.
‘We’ll be able to afford something better soon,’ Delphi said.
Natalie was overwhelmed with pity for her friend. She had such a fight ahead of her.
As soon as Mr and Mrs Mulberry had arrived, she and Jack had confessed all that they had hidden from his parents that summer. In her rage Mrs Mulberry had marched them along the promenade to the dark attic room on the top floor of Sid’s boarding house lodgings where Delphi had fled before they had even arrived.
Mrs Mulberry now inspected the pads of her fingers after she’d dusted them along the sideboard, while Mr Mulberry folded his arms and stood free of anything and everyone.
‘It’s not gentlemanly conduct, that much I do know.’ Mr Mulberry shook his head.
‘I will sleep on the floor.’ Sid ignored the accusations.
Mrs Mulberry laughed, shaking her head. ‘It’s a bit late for chivalry,’ she cut back, her American accent strengthening with her rage. ‘And your medicine?’ she asked Delphi. ‘Have you been taking it?’
‘I did stop for a while.’ This was news to Natalie. ‘But I’ve started again…’ Her voice faded away.
‘So has the cataplexy been worse?’ Mrs Mulberry persisted.
They both nodded, heads bowed in a way that suggested her sleeping fits had been more frequent and distressing.
‘And hallucinations?’
Delphi continued to look away.
Mrs Mulberry slapped her lap with exasperation. Natalie wished she had known and hadn’t been shut out.
‘How did you let things come to this?’ she asked. The question seemed to be aimed at the four of them. In amongst the exasperation lay a hint of compassion. But Mrs Mulberry was tugging Delphi’s suitcase out from beneath the bed, past the chamber pot, tossing it on to the bed and then opening the top drawer of the tall boy.
‘What are you doing?’ Delphi asked as Sid got to his feet, ‘I’ve only just unpacked all of that.’
‘You don’t seriously believe that we’re going to let you stay living here, do you?’
‘We gave you the freedom you wanted, but we had firm conditions and you broke them,’ added her father.
‘But I’m a grown woman and I have a fiancé and a baby on the way. I am Sid’s responsibility now.’
‘You know it wouldn’t take much for us to have you in an asylum.’
Delphi gasped, looked even paler and Sid made a show of getting out of his seat.
‘We’re not in America now, Mrs Mulberry,’ he cried. ‘Your barbaric ideas have no place here.’ But he stumbled on the chair leg and had to steady himself instead on Delphi’s shoulder.
They all knew what Delphi had been threatened with. In America they sterilised epileptics, narcoleptics, anyone they regarded as defective. They simply took away their ability to procreate.
‘We’ll have to make arrangements. Send you somewhere out of the public eye. You’ll need a nurse with you. Who knows what you’ve got ahead of you now. If she doesn’t survive this…’ Mrs Mulberry’s voice caught, her torso folded and her head collapsed into her hand. ‘Oh, Delphi,’ her mother cried now. Her face crumpled. ‘This is such a worry.’ And then the clouds cleared. The moment of weakness had passed. Her spine straightened. Her voice regained its strength. ‘How could you? How could you be so careless?’
Natalie pulled at a button on her cardigan, wishing she didn’t have to witness this. If she had been a better friend, then it wouldn’t have come to this.
‘I always thought that whilst you might threaten me, that when it came to it you wouldn’t do it.’ Delphi sat tall, ready for a fight, but her mother continued to fling clothes into the suitcase.
She stood and tried to wrestle the case from her mother’s hands, but Mrs Mulberry pushed her away and so she retreated back to Sid. Her whole life she’d been threatened with being left to rot in an asylum, or put on a ship to let the Americans deal with her; Mrs Mulberry’s threats were having the desired effect of weakening her daughter’s resolve.
‘If I had a daughter in good health, like Natalie say, then I’d be delighted to see her married off to the right man. But you’re not like Natalie.’
‘She is very capable of looking after herself.’ Natalie contemplated Delphi and knew that she didn’t have the same bravery as her friend. ‘Yet you are always determined to dictate the terms by which she lives her life…’
‘Now, Natty,’ Jack cautioned.
‘Outrageous! We are thinking of Delphi. And who do you think you are, speaking to me in this way? Of course,’ she looked to Jack. ‘She’s your fiancée now, isn’t she? Yet another revelation. You’ve all had a busy summer.’
Jack took her hand. Natalie found she preferred to watch Mrs Mulberry rather than see what Delphi thought of their engagement.
‘All I am trying to say,’ Natalie said in a quieter voice, ‘is that if Delphi had been permitted to pursue a teaching job that she could have managed around her illness, she wouldn’t have been driven to these lengths just to gain her independence.’
‘But we did concede, didn’t we?’ Mrs Mulberry ranted. ‘She wanted to train as a dance teacher at Linshatch and she enrolled and then she was expelled. How would the League of Health and Beauty be any different?’
‘Mother, you’re shouting,’ Jack said.
‘We thought you would be a safe pair of hands,’ Mrs Mulberry continued. ‘We let her come here with you. Look how that has turned out.’ What Mrs Mulberry said was true. She was culpable too and so she said nothing in reply. Meanwhile Sid’s eyes darted about, the sockets shadowy. Delphi clutched his hand and whispered words of encouragement in his ear. But she was showing signs of defeat too. She was pale and twitchy and it was really a wonder she was still on her feet at all.
Natalie cleared her throat and with an unsteady voice, spoke again. ‘If she wants to have this baby, then we should support her and help her.’
But Mrs Mulberry flew straight back at her. ‘You are going to have to learn to keep quiet if you want to get on in this family. Mr Mulberry and I are in the public eye, and with that comes a need to present a particular picture to the world.’ Her finger was wagging in Natalie’s face now. ‘I asked you to look after our daughter when you came here and you’ve just looked after yourself. I honestly don’t see how things could be any worse.’
‘She’s just trying to lead a normal life. That’s surely not so much to ask,’ she blurted out.
‘But she isn’t normal.’ Mrs Mulberry twitched with rage while the rest of them fell into silence, uncomfortable at being confronted with how Mrs Mulberry truly felt about Delphi.
Sid, unshaven and gaunt, his shirt collar loose around his neck, sensed her eyes on him and returned her gaze. His brown eyes now looked oversized in his drawn face. His hair without Brylcreem was lank and brittle and falling into his face.
‘Delphi has told me about your ideas for stopping people like us from having children.’ His weak voice carried a thin vein of conviction.
‘Well not you per se,’ Mr Mulberry jumped in, quick to backtrack on Mrs Mulberry’s condemnation. ‘Your problems stem from an injury not genetics.’
Mrs Mulberry harrumphed. ‘You’re being too kind, dear. He’s an inebriate for goodness’ sake.’
Sid’s hands were furled into pulsing fists and she didn’t blame him. To hear these views thrust into the room, without censure, was sickening – what would they say when they learnt he was a thief too? And to think Delphi had been concerned that he needed a job in order to secure their blessing.
‘The point is…’ Sid swallowed hard; he was shaking ‘…if that’s what you’re thinking for Delphi, well it’s not going to happen.’
‘It’s too late to sterilise her now, isn’t it! All this shows is that we should have acted sooner. But don’t you dare to tell me that it won’t happen because if she survives this I sure as hell won’t risk it hap
pening again.’
Natalie put her hand to her mouth. The dispassion they held for Delphi’s condition had long simmered beneath the surface but now it was boiling over, scalding everything in its path.
‘Mother!’ Delphi exclaimed, pulling Sid closer.
‘Let’s not get carried away.’ Jack spoke at last. ‘Surely for now the best thing is to send her away, have a nurse take care of her.’
‘And then have the child adopted, of course,’ added Mr Mulberry.
‘Who will want to adopt the child of a defective?’ Mrs Mulberry said.
‘This is your grandchild you are referring to,’ Natalie reminded them. ‘Can’t a compromise be reached?’ She looked to Jack for support but all she saw was just how much he feared his parents.
‘Delphi, there is something that you should know about Sid.’ Jack paused as if thinking twice about going on.
‘Jack, no.’ Natalie knew what he was going to say and she couldn’t see how it would do any good at all. Sid looked on the verge of collapse as it was. He leant into the dresser, head bowed, his eyes shut as he tried to gain control.
‘Sid…’ He spoke at last. ‘Sid is a thief.’ He left this accusation to hang. ‘You need to know, Delphi. He’s been stealing from the Lido all summer.’
Delphi wiped the corners of her eyes with the length of her forefinger. Everybody else in the room was quite still. Waiting for her reaction.
‘I know,’ Delphi said, her voice frail.
‘What do you mean you know?’ Jack continued. ‘Did he confess to you?’
Delphi shook her head.
Natalie held her breath. She had suspected something was amiss all along, but had shied away from it, not wanting to face up to the uncomfortable truth that they had let Delphi down.
‘I told him to do it,’ she spoke plainly, with a hint of provocation.
‘Is this what you meant by “trust me”?’ Natalie asked. ‘Stealing and lying? You’ll have to return the money. If Whittle finds out he’ll go to the police.’
If she could force Sid to steal from the Lido, what else was she capable of?
‘I know. I know. I still have it,’ she said. ‘Oh, don’t look at me like that. It was a desperate measure.’
Sid pulled a bottle and tumbler out from a drawer in the tall boy and poured himself a large whisky. Delphi helped him to sit down and stroked his back. He whispered something in her ear and she nodded slowly in response.
‘What other desperate measures have you taken?’ Mrs Mulberry asked.
Delphi folded her arms around her middle and watched Sid as he tipped back the tumbler and drank most of the whisky.
‘We just thought we might slip away with the money, live a quiet life somewhere where I can’t embarrass you. We still could.’
‘You mean you want us to pay you to disappear?’ Mr Mulberry reflected on the offer.
Sid looked to Delphi and she nodded her assent. He took down the last of the whisky in one gulp and wiped his mouth with the back of his hand.
‘A couple of hundred should do it.’
Delphi said nothing. Natalie gasped. How could any of them think this was a good idea?
‘What else did you mean by desperate measures?’ Mrs Mulberry’s tone grew more insistent.
Mr Mulberry counted out the notes, but Mrs Mulberry intercepted Sid before he could get to them and folded them into her fist.
‘We won’t stoop to this,’ she reprimanded her husband. ‘Scandal or not, you are our daughter and you don’t need to run and hide. We will help you.’
‘You’re not pregnant at all. Are you?’ Natalie blurted out. ‘You’re not even in love with Sid.’ She saw it all now, and she wasn’t sure whether to pity Delphi or despise her for her deceitfulness.
Mrs Mulberry absorbed Delphi’s covered face, her quiet sobs and asked, ‘Why would you tell us such a lie?’
They all waited for an answer while Sid stroked her shoulders and offered her a hankie. After a while she took a deep breath and then dropped her hands to her lap to address them all.
‘I told such a terrible fib because this is what you have driven me to.’ She sneered at her mother, who at last looked shaken and meek. ‘I had to do this to make you hear me. And thank heavens there isn’t a child, now that we’ve heard how far you would go. You have surprised me though,’ her voice broke. ‘I thought you would be glad to let us disappear somewhere,’ she sniffed. ‘And that you would pay us off to save you from gossip.’
‘Then we don’t know one another very well at all it seems,’ Mrs Mulberry replied, with regret. ‘And is Natalie correct, you don’t even love this man?’
‘Sid’s a dear, kind, sweet fellow. We understand one another’s afflictions, and what it feels to be cast aside because of them. He wanted to help me, and we’ve become good friends.’ She cradled his hand. ‘But Sid needs to save his strength to take good care of himself.’
Delphi’s eyes settled upon Natalie and her gaze spoke a thousand apologies. She had lied to Natalie. She had told her that their plans and hopes were dead and buried, that everything had changed, and Natalie had taken her at her word. The question now was, why? Had she concocted all of this just to escape her mother and father, or was it also to set Natalie free too?
‘And what now?’ Mrs Mulberry asked, snapping shut Delphi’s suitcase. The woman was shaken; that much was clear. She had asked Delphi what she wanted to do next, that was a turn up. Now she had been confronted with the effects of her controlling behaviour her demeanour lacked the usual steadfast certainty that she was acting in her daughter’s best interests.
‘I suggest we all let this sink in and come together again to discuss a sensible way forward, one that pleases everyone?’ Jack asked.
Mrs Mulberry pushed her hands into her driving gloves. She was fighting back the tears. She swallowed and once she had filled each of the gloves’ fingers she spoke. ‘My darling, darling daughter. Please know that while I loathe your condition, it is only that which I hate. I have felt driven to protect you, and yes I have been ashamed that your illness could plague a family of such good stock. But you are right…’ her voice rose in pitch ‘…I haven’t always listened to you and if we’ve learned anything from this debacle today, it’s that we must do that. Now, you can come with us if you like, or you can forge ahead in your own way and we’ll offer you our support.’
She slotted her gloved fingers together while she waited, but Delphi refused her father’s crooked arm.
‘I’m very sorry for the trouble I have caused,’ Delphi murmured. ‘I need to think it through.’
‘Very well then.’ Mrs Mulberry hesitated a moment longer, but when it became clear that Delphi wasn’t going to change her mind, she left the room with her head bowed, her hand to her mouth.
Natalie and Jack waited behind. How Delphi hadn’t had a fit in the face of all this Natalie didn’t know, but then her narcolepsy had always been an unpredictable beast.
As soon as they were gone, Sid came straight towards Jack, his good hand outstretched. ‘I must apologise for all the trouble.’
‘You have nothing to be sorry for, Sid my dear,’ Delphi interrupted before he could go on. ‘You’re so kind, and the only thing you did wrong was not saying no to me, even when I encouraged you to steal, lost you your livelihood and caused a rut between you and Jack.’
‘I should apologise to you, for the accusation …’ Jack said.
‘Me too,’ added Natalie.
‘You underestimated him,’ Delphi said. ‘By the time we were lying about the pregnancy, I knew we had gone too far, but I was just so determined that I wouldn’t go back to live with Mother and Father and I really thought they’d pay us to disappear and then they would never have known there wasn’t a baby. Can you forgive me?’ she asked Jack, not Natalie she noticed.
‘I think I understand why you did it, but my goodness Delphi couldn’t you have just asked for help?’
Her shrug – a gesture that said ‘I don�
��t know’ – was all she seemed to be able to offer.
‘She did.’ Natalie whispered so quietly it was meant to be inaudible, but Delphi raised her eyes towards her as if she had heard her perfectly well. She has been asking for help all along.
‘I suppose I ought to thank you for trying to support Delphi.’ As Jack spoke, Delphi looked away and began to replace her clothes from the suitcase into the drawers. ‘Now this money you’ve stolen – you’ve still got it you say? Then we need to get it back in the safe before Arthur catches on. Gala day would be a good way of smuggling in some extra takings.’
The two men moved to the window to discuss the upcoming gala, and Natalie marvelled at how quickly the two of them had resolved their differences and reverted to things as they’d been before. Delphi realised she was being watched and stopped, holding a half-folded blouse at her chest.
There was a question Natalie couldn’t get out of her head. She could see that Delphi was still reeling from the scene with her mother, but there was something that she needed to know and it couldn’t wait.
‘Why did you lie to me too?’ she asked in a quiet voice. ‘Didn’t you trust me? I mean, about Sid especially. You let me think you were in love with him…’
‘I told you the lies you wanted to hear.’ Delphi slid the blouse across the back of her hand and into the drawer, reaching behind to the suitcase for the next one.
Natalie let out a sour tut. ‘This isn’t the old nonsense about you cutting me free, is it?’ Her voice had risen an octave and the men broke away from their conversation. She paused and smiled to reassure them that they were just chatting amicably before she continued with a patient tone she didn’t feel. ‘If I hadn’t wanted to be tied to you, I would have undone the knot and cast you away a long time ago.’
Delphi pushed the drawer of the tall boy to a close.
‘Congratulations, incidentally, on your engagement.’ She clipped her empty suitcase closed and slotted it back in its place beside the chamber pot, under the bed. ‘I think the best thing for you and I is a clean break.’
‘Oh. Is it? You seem rather adept at knowing what is best for me: what I need, what I want. When did you become the expert?’
