by Roxy Wilson
“Great.” He splayed his fingers. “I’ve given this matter some thought and would like to inform you that I want to be an active participant in the baby’s life.”
The way he talked, all prim and proper, made it hard for her to concentrate. Or perhaps, it was the fact that she couldn’t get past his looks that took her breath away. This needed to stop. She wasn’t going to be swayed by this man’s charms or good looks, at all. Once was more than enough. “What do you mean?”
“I want to be a father who is there for his baby. I want it all: the sharing of custody, the duties, the back and forth from activities, and everything else that goes with raising a child.”
This is what she wanted him to say when she met him that day on the farm. In her mind, she’d built a picture of him as the caring and giving guy who would naturally want to be a part of his child’s life. When he disappointed her, she felt angry not only at him, but also at herself for being such a fool. For believing that he was one of the good guys. So, now that he was here, offering her exactly what she envisioned, she could hardly believe it. Her breath hitched in her throat. “Do you really mean it?”
He nodded. The glasses slipped down and he pushed them back up. “Yes, I do. With all my heart. I’ll be there for you in every way possible.”
Of course, they weren’t a couple. That could never be. Still, this was a start. A fantastic, giant leap in the right direction. She should’ve been ecstatic and over the moon, but as she gazed into his eyes, Tasha realized that perhaps now she just might be in greater trouble than before. Heath Dawson could possibly be the man of her dreams—and by him showing up here, she was in danger of losing her heart.
Chapter Four
Seeing the softened look in her eyes, Heath felt as if he won half the battle. After the dismissive attitude, she showed him during their last meeting, he didn’t expect her to forgive him easily, but she wasn’t as difficult as he thought she would be. “So when is the first doctor’s appointment? I would like to go with you.”
Her eyelashes flickered over her dark eyes. Clearly, she felt surprised by his offer. “I’m due to go for an ultrasound in a few weeks. You can come with me.”
“Great.” He rubbed his jaw, at a loss for what else to say. Irritated as he was by this whole mess, seeing her made it was easy for him to forget that he didn’t want to be here. Every time he looked at her, her allure punched him straight in the gut. Her loose hair hung straight down, framing her beautiful, delicate face. Her gaze, straight and honest, rendered him breathless. “I’ve been Googling quite a lot lately about babies and pregnancy.”
“Same here. I’ve got a great book. If you want to read, I could lend it to you.”
He sucked in some air and let it out. “Thanks.”
“Would you like some coffee?”
He glanced at his watch. “Actually, I have an appointment with my accountant. My papers are in a little bit of a mess. You know accountants...they want everything to be in perfect order.”
“I’m an accountant.”
Flabbergasted, he stared at her. Did he know this? Had she told him during their brief but tumultuous first time romp in bed? “You are? Sorry. I didn’t mean to insult you.”
She raised her hand. “Not, it’s okay. Most of my clients are the same. It’s not easy to keep papers organized for the whole year.” Tasha shook her head. “The stories I can tell you...” She laughed. “Well, anyway, best of luck.”
“Yeah, you too.” This situation was awkward and weird. However, in a strange way, he felt a connection with her because she was carrying his child. His gaze darted to her stomach for a second, but of course, no bump was visible. It would be too early according to the information he read on the internet. The baby bump didn’t show until the fourth month, and in some cases, the fifth month. She looked slim, so she probably wouldn’t show for a long time. How would she look with her belly sticking out? He would bet she would be gorgeous at all stages of her pregnancy. “So, have you got everything covered? I’ve got money saved and would be happy to contribute to the doctor’s bills.”
She waved a hand. “It’s all right. My insurance will cover most, if not all, the costs.”
Heath didn’t really have a clue how much it cost to have a baby and to raise one. They would have to develop some kind of a system to share everything. “But what about after the birth? And the hospital? Then the stuff that you would need to buy for the baby? It would be better if we sat together and estimated the total cost and I’ll chip in half of it.” Inspiration struck him. “How about we open a joint account? I’ll put in some money and you could take it out whenever you need to pay for baby stuff.”
Her expression hardened. “I didn’t contact you because I needed money.”
For some reason this talk of money appeared to offend her. He couldn’t think of a reason as to why she would take exception to such practical matters. She was an accountant, after all. What’s the big deal? It was his baby. He wanted to be equal partner in everything. “I realize that. It’s just that I wouldn’t want this burden to fall solely on you.”
“It’s not a burden. I’m able to support myself and the baby.”
Heath resisted the urge to scoff at her tone. What the hell? Why did she have to be so difficult about accepting money? It wasn’t as if he was shoving it down her throat. He wanted to contribute to the welfare of the—his—child. Why was it so hard for her to understand? Well, she was in a delicate stage. Maybe he shouldn’t push so hard. “I know you can support yourself and the baby. It’s not because I think you need the money, but at some point, we’ll have to sit and discuss about things related to the baby, such as buying a crib and a stroller, and whatever else is needed. And then what about school and books and lessons? Kids need a lot of things.”
“And I’ll provide all of them in time,” she said in a voice that brooked no argument.
“So what am I supposed to do?”
She appeared a bit startled by his question. “What do you mean? Raising a child just isn’t about the money. It’s about giving time and making an effort. It would be nice if we could come to some kind of an arrangement about taking care of the baby, taking him or her to the park. We could take turns and maybe babysit for each other, that sort of thing.”
Heath frowned. “So, you want me to do all that but not contribute to the financial aspect of it? May I ask why?”
“Because I don’t want your money!”
“Ah…” He tapped a foot on the floor, now more annoyed than ever by her obstinacy. “So it’s your ego that’s at stake here.”
“This has nothing to do with my ego.”
“Yes it does, but you’re too pigheaded to see that.”
She jammed her hands on her hips, her eyes glowing with passionate fire. “Excuse me?”
“Don’t give me that look.” He waved a finger. “I’m good enough to accompany you to the doctor’s appointments and play with the child in the park, but my money isn’t good enough for you or my baby.” He cocked an eyebrow. “Right?”
“I can’t believe we’re having this argument.” She glared with all the ferocity of a wounded tigress.
If he wasn’t so pissed off, he would’ve enjoyed seeing the expression on her face.
“Can’t believe why I went to you in the first place. You’re soo not the man I thought you were.”
“And you’re not the woman I slept with. She was sweet. What did you do to her? Are you like her evil twin or something?”
She growled, showing her pearly white teeth. “You’d better believe it.”
“Fine.” A few minutes ago, he thought this would work out. Tasha wasn’t such a bad person. Their meeting at the farm was probably his mistake. Now though, after this conversation, he could see she was too unreasonable for her own good…and the good of their child. There was no talking sense to this woman. “Have it your way.” Then with those words, he marched off. Heath walked for a while, mostly to burn off the anger bubbling inside hi
m.
The woman was too bad-tempered, and difficult. How the hell was he expected to form any sort of a relationship with her? If they couldn’t work things out before the baby was born, how would things fall into place after the child arrived? When the baby came into their life, she would be sleep-deprived and short of time in addition to the terrible temper that she harboured even now. It would make this whole situation even more dicey. He didn’t think his nerves could take this kind of thing on a regular basis.
Why the hell did he sleep with her? What was he thinking? The alcohol he consumed must have rendered him completely blind and oblivious to her true nature. But he made the mistake and for the rest of his life, he would be stuck with her because of their unborn child.
As he strode down the road, his cell phone rang. It was his accountant. “Yes, Mr. Cochrane. I’m on my way.” Shit! When will I get this mess sorted out? If it isn’t one thing, it’s another.
“Will you bring the missing papers?”
Heath patted the papers that were shoved into the pocket of his jeans. “Some of them.”
Mr. Cochrane sighed. “We need all of them to work this out. You know that, Mr. Dawson. I can’t work with what you’ve given me.”
“I’ll be there in a while. Let’s talk about this when I reach your office.” Heath hung up. Dear Lord! What was he going to do? He started his farm three years ago. Although he did well with the overall management and the actual rearing of horses, and even the lessons that he gave children, his accounting skills were dismal beyond belief. He was terrible with paperwork and more often than not, delayed getting to it…to the point where it became impossible to get a handle on it.
Yes, this was his punishment for being so disorganized. Sure, he took the blame for it and was willing to admit he would benefit from hiring someone who would do all this for him. Maybe it was time to hire some temporary help who would take over the paperwork.
If he could admit his mistakes, why the hell couldn’t that woman accept she was wrong to take offense when he didn’t mean to give any? He offered her help, and she threw it in his face as if he were trying to insult her. Well, two could play this game. He didn’t want anything to do with her if that was how it was going to be. As far as he was concerned, Tasha wasn’t any of his business—their baby was.
Then why were his thoughts constantly straying towards her? Why couldn’t he forget the way her eyes gleamed when she was spitting mad? Why couldn’t he forget about her body?
Shit! Was it just the baby or was he still attracted to the woman?
If the latter was true, he was doomed—and there was no saving him.
Chapter Five
Tasha glanced at Heath who was flipping through the magazine in a bored manner while they sat in the doctor’s office. After their last fight, she assumed he wouldn’t come for the appointment but he called to get the information and showed up at the clinic even before she did. He had a bad attitude but she could tell he was serious about parenthood, even more than she expected. It did feel nice to know he cared for the baby at this early stage. Also, if she were honest, Tasha admitted she acted more than a little irrationally at their last meeting.
He wanted to share the costs. What was the big deal about it? Somehow, she took it as a personal insult to her own financial condition. Only the truth was just because she could raise their child on her own didn’t meant she should do it. It would be good for the baby to know that both parents cared deeply enough to contribute to everything. Married people did the same, so why couldn’t they?
An apology was due, but this wasn’t the time or place.
“Ms. Millien, please come in.” A nurse led them inside an ultrasound room. She helped Tasha on the bed, adjusted the machine, applied the gel on the stomach, and then stepped to the side.
Then Dr. Kelsick bustled in. Her dove gray hair was covered with a cap and she wore a coat over her clothes that were barely visible. “You look a bit nervous.”
Tasha nodded. “I am.” To say that Tasha was nervous was an understatement. She now remembered her visit 2 weeks ago.
Dr. Kelsick had covered the fetal Doppler, the handheld ultrasound, with gel and moved it around her belly.
Then, there was a loud thump, thump, thump. Frightened, she had shifted. “What’s that?”
“That’s your baby’s heartbeat,” the doctor replied in a kind manner. “Your baby has a nice, strong heartbeat.”
Wow. Wow. Wow.
Tasha felt the tears gathering behind her eyes as she continued to listen to the sounds of life. Her baby’s tiny heartbeat sounded like the boom of galloping horses. What a momentous event!
The click of the monitor being switched on jolted Tasha to the present.
“There’s no need to worry about anything, dear. This is just a routine exam to check if everything is all right with the baby. You’re about twenty weeks pregnant. Your blood work is quite good, so far. But we need to confirm that your baby doesn’t have Down syndrome. We’ll also like to check to see if the placenta is in the correct position and if your baby is growing at the rate that it should.”
“Okay, I understand.” Tasha clenched the sheet in her hand as the doctor put the probe on her stomach. What if there was something wrong with the baby? One of her cousins had a miscarriage a year ago and was traumatized. She didn’t want anything to be wrong with her baby. As Tasha prayed silently, she gasped in surprise when Heath reached out and intertwined his fingers in hers. Desperate for comfort, she clutched his hand as it if it were a life support.
“You can see everything on the screen,” Dr. Kelsick said as she pointed to the monitor. Her child, who so far, was only an image in her head, was already taking shape. He or she was alive. Suddenly, the screen flickered and she could see a large lump in the middle of it. It was hard to make out what she was seeing.
Probably because the doctor was aware of their inexperience, she began to point out the various body parts. “Look…that’s your baby’s head.” She took measurements as she explained, “And that’s a leg, another leg, and the two hands.”
Tasha should’ve been prepared to see how tiny everything looked on the monitor, because after all, it was a baby—but she wasn’t. She glanced over at Heath and saw his gaze was trained on the screen. Tasha was taken aback by the expression of awe on his face. Perhaps, her own expression mirrored his.
“Would you like to know if it’s a boy or a girl?” Dr. Kelsick asked.
Tasha wasn’t bothered about finding out the gender of the child, and would much prefer to keep it as a surprise for them. She felt intrigued by the element of mystery, but she wondered if Heath wanted to find out before delivery.
“It looks like a real person—but…” Heath seemed to be at a loss for words.
Tasha fought the lump that lodged in her throat. This was her baby and soon, she would be a mother.
The doctor reached out and patted their clasped hands. “Most parents aren’t sure about whether or not they want to know the sex of their child. One might want to know, but the other doesn’t.” She chuckled. “Sometimes, I write it down and put it in an envelope for them to open at home. The good news is that your baby is healthy and is growing at the perfect rate. Congratulations.” Dr. Kelsick smiled. “Do you have any questions?”
Tasha’s heart was full and overflowing. “I don’t have any right now, but I bet I’ll have a million and one of them as soon as I get home.” She turned to Heath. “You have any questions you want to ask Dr. Kelsick?”
His hand tightened on hers. “I’m a bit too overwhelmed to think of any questions right now, but I definitely would like to keep the identity of the sex of the child a secret.” He smiled, his heart-stopping smile. “At least, for now.”
The doctor nodded. “Very well, then.” She turned to Tasha. “I’m going to adjust the dose of your multivitamins. Make sure to take them daily and follow the instructions I gave you on your last visit.”
Tasha was shocked to see tears in Heath�
�s eyes as he gazed at the screen where the image of their baby was still showing. He sat still and quiet. The look on his face was so profound, so full of joy and wonder, that it stunned her. It seemed obvious he was moved by the whole experience. Tasha felt as if she were eavesdropping on a very private moment. Gently, she extracted her hand from his and adjusted her shirt. “Are you all right?”
“Yes.” Wiping his fingers over his eyes, he stood. He held her arm and helped her off the bed. “That was beautiful.”
Tasha couldn’t help the tears that slid down her cheeks. “Yes, it was.”
The doctor stood and switched off the machine.
They both moved to the doctor’s desk and sat. The doctor wrote Tasha’s prescription, handed it to her, and wished them both the best of luck. Tasha strode out the doctor’s office while Heath followed her.
She ran a hand through her hair. “I guess I should get going.”
“Actually, I was thinking...” He paused as if unsure. “…I was wondering if you would like to have lunch with me. We’re both going to be parents soon, and I would like us to raise the baby without indulging in shouting matches. We’ve—got off to a rocky start but given time, we may be able to improve our relationship. I think that would benefit the baby.”
Touched by his offer, Tasha nodded. He was making a lot of sense. What’s more, she’d been thinking along the same lines. She didn’t want them to be like those couples who never saw eye to eye on anything. Not a couple! Oh, no, we aren’t. But they were parents for life. It would be important for them to bond and have the ability to talk things out without lashing out at each other. “I would like that very much. And I would also like to apologize for my behavior. You meant well—about the cost and just about everything else.” Tasha took a deep breath and released it quickly. “It was my—my ego that took a beating. You hit the nail on the head.”
