by Books Kid
“Hey, you! You destroyed my web! I worked like crazy, spinning that!”
I looked up from the puddle and saw an angry spider scuttling toward me.
“And what are you doing on our side of the swamp, huh?” the spider demanded. “I thought we had a deal. You slimes, you have your own side. Go back there right now, before I make you.”
I gulped. Facing one of these horrible spiders, all my childhood nightmares came rushing back. I used to wake up screaming from dreams filled with spiders attacking me. Slimes are strong, but so are spiders, and they know how to use each of their eight legs to their full potential.
Yet, I had come all the way here for spider eyes, and I knew full well that no one was going to just hand them to me. It was time to do what I’d come here to do. I took a deep breath, puffing myself up to look as big and menacing as possible, and threw myself at the spider, hoping that the element of surprise would give me the upper hand. If I could flip the spider onto its back, it would have a more difficult time fighting. Otherwise, it was going to be face-to-face combat, and that was going to be hard to win, even for an experienced slime like me.
I was about to strike the spider with all my might, when suddenly I felt myself soar through the air.
I’d been caught!
I’d landed right in the middle of a webbed trap, and now I was swinging from side to side, hanging from a tree in a spiderweb net.
I wanted to throw up, and not just because of the swinging. I’d been stupid enough to get caught by spiders—and now I was done for.
What had I been thinking? Was it worth it, risking my life for some dumb costume?
DAY 17
“Look how slippery he is! He’s going to ooze right out of our trap if we leave him up there too long.”
It was the following day. I pretended to be asleep so I could listen to the group of spiders talking about what they were planning to do with me. It wasn’t going to be good, so the more information I could pick up, the better. I might learn something useful if they kept talking.
“Okay, slime. You can stop pretending. We know you’re awake!” hissed one of the spiders.
I sighed and opened my eyes, wriggling about in the net so that I could look down on them.
“I HAVE A NAME, YOU kNOW!”
I cried in return.
“Do we look like we care?” the spider jeered.
“You’re nothing but a slime, just like the rest of them. You don’t need a name. You’re nothing but a big useless glob of goo who should be banished from our swamp. This place would be much better without you and your kind in it.”
“I could say the same about you,” I replied. “You scuttle all over the place and destroy everything in your path. And your webs are real public nuisances. This place would be much neater without you and your kind.”
“Those are very brave words for a slime caught in one of our webs,” countered the spider. “Anyway, that’s enough, no more joking around. Take him down and finish him off.”
“WAIT!” I cried. “We should be able to come to some kind of agreement. I don’t mean any harm.”
“Oh, yeah?” chuckled the spider. “Then why have you come into our territory? You know you’re not supposed to be here.”
“I wanted some spider eyes,” I muttered.
“Spider eyes?” the spider exclaimed in disbelief. “And how exactly were you going to get them without doing any of us any harm?”
“I said that I didn’t want to harm anybody,” I explained. “And that is the truth. But I need spider eyes to give to the witch.”
“To the witch, you say?”
“Yes. I want to buy a potion of strength from her.”
“She’s selling you a potion?” asked the spider, suddenly looking thoughtful. “If she is selling you a potion, maybe she would be willing to sell us one, too.”
I saw my chance, so I seized it.
“Why should you go all the way to the witch’s hut? You’d have to cross slime territory to get there, and you’d be in the same kind of mess I’m in. You’d never stand a chance against all my friends. Why don’t you let me go talk to the witch? I’m certain that I could convince her to give you a good deal.”
“Or, why don’t you buy a potion of poison from her, instead of your potion of strength?”
“But I don’t want a potion of poison!”
“Maybe not. But we do. We’re immune to poison but we thought it would be a lot of fun if we could spit poison on our enemies. One mouthful of potion, and the fight is over.”
“WHAT AN AWESOME IDEA!” I thought to myself, forgetting for a minute the trouble I was in.
I wish I’d thought of an idea like that.
Maybe I could build something in to my costume that would allow me to spray potions on Minecraftians. They would never see it coming.
“Thanks, we think so, too,” said the spider, smiling widely. “We have lots of eyes to give the witch—so, if you bring us our poison, we’ll forget you trespassed on our territory, and you’ll be free to go.”
I shook my head.
“Sorry, but I really need my potion of strength. Unless . . . If I bring you a potion of poison, would you give me eyes in exchange?”
The spider thought about it.
“That works,” the spider finally said. “But it’s in your best interest to return—otherwise we’ll consider the pact between spiders and slimes broken. We’ll invade your side of the swamp and we’ll eliminate every slime that we come across, with or without poison.”
I GULPED.
“Don’t worry. You’ll get your potion,” I promised.
DAY 18
I arrived at Tiffin’s hut the following morning and knocked on the door.
“Back already, slime?” she said, impressed. “I didn’t expect to see you for a few days. Give me the spider eyes and I’ll go get you your potion.”
“Right, about that . . .” I began. “I don’t actually have them yet.”
“So why are you wasting my time?” Tiffin screeched, about to slam the door in my face. “Get out of here and go fetch me my spider eyes.”
“NO, WAIT!”
I jumped forward to stop her from closing the door.
“I said I don’t have the eyes yet,” I explained, “but I can get them for you. I just need a potion of poison first.”
“And you think that I’m going to just give you one for nothing?”
“It would be great if you did . . .”
I begged her with my eyes, hoping that she’d take pity on me and make my life easier. The witch threw back her head and shrieked with laughter.
“If I won’t just give you a potion of strength, it’s not likely I’ll just hand over a potion of poison either, wouldn’t you think?”
“That’s true,” I sighed. “What’s your price?”
“I need more puffer fish,” she declared. “Bring me five of them, and you can have your potion of poison.”
“Five puffer fish,” I repeated.
“You’re not going to try to haggle again, right?” the witch warned. “Because I can always raise that to ten.”
“No, no,” I hurried to reassure her. “Five puffer fish, very good.”
“Wonderful. Now go away and stop bothering me. I have potions to prepare.”
The witch slammed the door and I hopped off to the nearest lake.
DAY 19
I stared glumly at the puffer fish jumping out of the water, thinking to myself that all these little trips and early mornings were beginning to wear me out. That witch was really making me earn those potions.
Why couldn’t she give me something simple to do?
Everyone knows that slimes and lake water don’t mix. If I tried to go into the lake, I would dissolve. Catching puffer fish was not going to be easy. As I slumped down by the shore, I wondered how I’d managed to get myself into so much debt, not only with the witch, but with the spiders, too.
AND FOR WHAT?
If tha
t potion didn’t make my costume stronger, I would have my revenge on Tiffin.
I DIDN’T CARE IF THIS MEANT THAT THE FOREST COULD BE OVERRUN WITH WITCHES. TIFFIN WAS GOING TO FEEL MY WRATH.
But, for now, I was exhausted. I went home to get some sleep so I’d have enough energy to catch Tiffin’s fish tomorrow.
DAY 20
New day, new energy!
I rushed to the edge of the lake to try and catch a puffer fish in mid-flight as it leapt out of the water. But they were too quick for me, and I had to make sure I wouldn’t fall in.
I FELT DEFEATED.
I was there for hours, but I didn’t catch a single fish. It wouldn’t be much longer before the spiders became fed up with me and went straight to the witch themselves.
Suddenly, a delicious aroma tickled my nostrils. A MINECRAFTIAN!
It seemed like forever since I’d had a real meal, so I decided to take a break and give myself a little treat. Maybe I’d have better luck on a full stomach.
I went around the lake and spotted a fisherman with his line in the water. Even better! If I snacked on a fisherman, maybe, by osmosis, I would learn some things about catching puffer fish.
As I drew closer, I heard a snore. He was fast asleep! I just hoped he was having pleasant dreams, because this was one nap he was never going to wake up from.
I leapt on the villager, who was sleeping on his stomach, and began to devour him. If only puffer fish were as easy to catch as Minecraftians—then I would have gotten both potions by now.
At last I was full, and I sat back and looked at the lake. The fish were playing around in the water, as if taunting me with their every movement. I could almost hear them laughing, because they knew very well that I couldn’t follow them into the lake.
“Come into the water and get us, slime!” they giggled.
I moved away from the fisherman and tripped over a basket overflowing with fish. It was the fisherman’s catch of the day!
I was blown away by my luck. There was a ton of puffer fish in here, many more than I needed.
I hurried to gather them all up. I was closer than ever to getting my potion of strength.
DAY 21
The next day, I drummed on the door of the witch’s hut.
“Delivery for Tiffin the witch!” I cried. When she opened the door, I placed the basket of fish at her feet.
“Ta-da!” I trumpeted. “Look! All the puffer fish you’ll ever need!”
“Well, I’d be surprised if there were as many as that in here,” Tiffin sniffed.
But I saw she was impressed. I had even packed a few fishing lures and other things I’d found lying around near the fisherman, just in case she would find them useful. I told myself it would be a good idea to be in a witch’s good graces for the future. You never knew when you might need to ask her for a favor.
“So, can I have my potion of poison?” I asked.
“Well, I suppose so,” Tiffin sighed. She disappeared into her hut and returned with a bottle filled with a strange-colored liquid.
“Here it is,” she said. “Don’t use it all at once. It’s very strong.”
“Don’t worry, that won’t happen,” I promised.
Well, that wouldn’t happen with me, anyway.
This potion was meant for the spiders, and it was their problem if they wasted it. Me, I only wanted my spider eyes.
DAY 22
I bounced across the swamp and couldn’t wipe the grin off my face. I had managed to get a potion of poison from the witch without having to fight her, and now the spiders were going to give me their eyes.
Everything was going so much better than I had ever hoped it would.
“STOP! Who goes there?”
A spider jumped out at me, and I couldn’t keep myself from recoiling. These things were so repulsive. Up close, they were even uglier than I remembered them being.
“What do you want, slime?” hissed the spider, who was clearly one their guards.
“It’s me, Slibertius. I came here a few days ago,
remember? I promised to bring you back a potion of poison—and here it is. So, if you’d like to take me to your spider leader—we had agreed on a bargain.”
“A bargain?” the spider mocked. “We don’t bargain with slimes. Thanks very much for delivering the potion. Give it to us and be on your way.”
“No, no,” I said, shaking my head. “We had a deal. You promised me twenty-four spider eyes in exchange for this potion, and I’m not giving you anything until I get what you owe me.”
The spider burst into laughter.
“We’re supposed to give you what? Twenty-four eyes?” The spider convulsed with laugher and slapped his thighs.
“We will never give you any eyes. Whoever made you that offer tricked you. So, hand over the potion and be on your way. I won’t say it again.”
“I’m not giving you anything,” I said. “If I have to collect my spider eyes by force, so be it. But, in that case, I keep this potion. I’m sure I can find a use for it.”
“That potion belongs to us and you will give it here—or else we’ll just take it.”
“WE?”
It was my turn to laugh. The spider was all alone and I was angry enough to take it out on him without even thinking about it.
“You and what army?” I asked.
“Me, myself, and I!” jeered the spider. “Oh, and yes! My other friends as well!”
There was a rustling in the bushes. Three other spider guards emerged and took positions on either side of the first spider.
I gulped. One spider was bad enough—but four! These odds were not in my favor. But, despite everything, I refused to let them have my hard-won potion.
“LET THE BATTLE BEGIN!” I rumbled and threw myself at the spiders.
They came to meet me head-on. This was going to be the battle of the century.
Ow! One of the spiders bit me and I felt my goo tingle.
Oof! I took my revenge by hitting the spider smack in the middle of his eight eyes.
“THAT’S ENOUGH!”
The cry carried over the sounds of our fighting, and we all froze in place, tangled up with each other, desperately trying to cause as much harm as possible to our opponents. An enormous spider stomped through the clearing toward us.
“Guards! Would one of you care to explain to me exactly what is going on here?”
“I sent this slime on a mission,” the larger spider, their leader, explained to him. “We are creatures who keep our word. What do you think would happen if we broke our promises? We are respectable monsters, not Minecraftians. You’ve tried to rob this slime? How dare you? Though he may be disgusting, we made a deal, and you should be ashamed of yourself for having broken it. Apologize immediately.”
“We’re sorry,” breathed the spiders before withdrawing, dragging their feet in shame.
“Now it is my turn to apologize,” the spiders’ leader continued as she turned toward me. “My guards ought to have shown better judgment. You can be sure they’ll be punished for their actions. Please, have dinner with us tomorrow. Allow me to make amends for their bad behavior.”
“With great pleasure.”
Truth be told, I couldn’t think of anything worse than eating with spiders, but I didn’t want to risk offending the spiders’ leader—not when I was so close to getting what I wanted.
DAY 23
“Isn’t this magnificent? Our chef has really outdone himself today,” Jiggly, the spiders’ leader, exclaimed.
I fought hard to keep the disgust off my face as I looked at all the bugs spread out on the table in front of us.
I did not want to upset Jiggly, just as I was on the brink of getting what I wanted, but I thought I was going to vomit if I had to swallow even one of those creepy-crawlies.
“Go ahead, dig in!” Jiggly encouraged me, as she took a large mouthful of fried critters.
I took a deep breath and I closed my eyes, so I wouldn’t have to look at what I w
as eating. I randomly grabbed something, tossed it in my mouth, and swallowed without even chewing, so that I couldn’t taste it, whatever it was.
Curiously, it wasn’t as bad as I had thought it would be. Still, I wasn’t about to replace Minecraftians with bugs anytime soon. Finally, the feast came to an end. I had survived a meal
with spiders, and I was probably the first slime in history who could say that.
Jiggly burped loudly.
“That was the best banquet in the world,” she declared before turning to me. “What’s the matter? You didn’t enjoy your meal?”
“It was delicious,” I assured her.
“So, why didn’t you burp?”
“Oh, sorry.”
I had no idea that spiders considered this to be good manners. Luckily, I’ve always been able to burp on command.
“I’ve been letting one simmer so that it can be loud enough to do justice to your hospitality,” I added.
BURRRRRP!
I LET OUT THE BIGGEST BURP THAT THE SWAMP HAD EVER HEARD.
It was so loud it frightened birds out of the trees and fish out of the lakes.
It was so loud I even scared myself!
“Very good. Now it’s time to talk business.”
Jiggly led me to a part of the swamp I’d never been to before.
“We had promised you twenty spider eyes in exchange for the potion of poison?”
“TWENTY-FOUR,” I corrected.
“Twenty-four,” she laughed. “Of course.”
The spider plunged her legs into the hole of a tree and brought out a little bag. She opened it and emptied the contents into one of her hands to count them.
“TWENTY-TWO . . . TWENTY-THREE . . . TWENTY-FOUR!” she announced, holding out the eyes to me. “Here you are. You can count them yourself if you wish.”
“I trust you,” I replied politely, pocketing my bounty.
