by Love Belvin
“‘Bout to now. Just wanted to put you D on the latest.”
“What’s that?” I carefully guided the blade around my ear.
“That beach house Popov keep his sister and them?” My eyes widened to her. “That shit a mountain of ashes.”
I lowered the blade. “Who?”
“Danny Lopez.” Her expression was a mixture of shock-humor. “Look like that nigga, Danny, ain’t forget his pop’s restaurant. He waited it out.”
It had been a little over a month since Popov burned down La Cocina, one of Lopez’s restaurants. I’d heard Danny, the son and current inheritor of his father, Luis’, estate, took it hard. He’d lost family in the fire.
“I guess no one can fault him.” I tossed my chin to her. “What now?”
Rory scoffed. “Obviously, a muthafuckin’ war popped off with that.”
I shook my head, meeting her gaze in the mirror. “Lopez’s crew ain’t long enough for that. Plus, they’re heavily reliant on relatives and not employees. When one of their men drop, the L is different.”
“No cap.”
I took a minute to think about that. Under normal circumstances, I wouldn’t advise my father to get involved, but in this case, there were several compelling factors beckoning my attention. Taaliba had seemed to be…involved with him lately. Per Popov, they’d developed a disgusting sexual relationship. I could give a shit about a kiddie kissing game, however, she’d spent time with him. Leaving Danny Lopez alone in this battle assured the end of the Lopez name. They didn’t have the resources to go against Popov. Also, my father and I were at war with Popov, too. My father for dropping Popov as a weapons supplier, and me for his foot soldier using my wife as a pawn to get to my father. Bilan could have easily been killed that day if Popov’s plan was to do more than rattle my father.
“Hit up, Double E Bags’ new right hand, Daz. Tell him I said it may be wise to send a few good men to war aside the Lopez’s. Keep an eye on the situation in case they need more before we have to pull in fully under Double E’s behalf against Popov.”
She nodded, but Rory’s eyes were to the floor.
“What is it, Bean?” I knew that look.
“I just…” She changed position, swiping her nose. “Going to war… I’m good with wherever the shit goes. You know that; I’m built for this shit.”
“Say it.”
“You never wanted it.” Rory shrugged. “Whenever we got our hands dirty, it was underneath Double E. This shit with Popov and you is personal. Going to war put you on the fight line next to your pops. That some shit you ain’t never want.” She shook her head, her eyes unable to meet mine. “You busted ya ass for all the shit you got. You bust ya ass to build a legit dynasty, and you just filled ya seeds and a wifey in it. Now that some nigga stepped on ya shoes—meaning wifey—you ready to shoot the park up in daylight. I just ‘on’t want that for you. I want you to have that happily ever after, my nigga.”
Quickly, she left the doorway. My gaze shifted to myself in the mirror. After her words of heeding, I saw something there. It was something that had been present for over a month, but I’d been too busy moving to recognize it.
I saw Earl Ellis.
On my way to the waiting car, I texted Randi.
Me: I got us a hotel suite. Ask Brenda if she wants to come. I can’t drink but I can turn up somehow.
Rolling my eyes at my comment, I glanced up to open the back door of Sadik’s sleek ruby-black Mercedes-Maybach. My truck was undergoing maintenance repairs and he told me I’d have to “settle” for his car today. That tickled me as I slipped inside, scooting over to center myself in my seat. My gaze lifted to the front of the car and I steeled.
Rory’s small frame twisted around to face me as she sported the widest most disingenuous grin.
I rolled my eyes, letting out a deep sigh of disappointment and annoyance.
“Out of all the drivers on this ‘plantation,’ why are you here?” I grated.
“Because my sire asked me to drive his royal highness to the mall today.”
“Don’t do me any favors.” My face was tight with unbridled anger.
She pushed her phone out to me.
On instinct—and foolishly—I took it. Rory had a Droid, but through the annoying curvy, colored font, I was able to make out a message between her and a “Jawbreaker.” At least, that was the profile name. The person asked her when would they be able to hang out now that they were related. Rory asked how were they related. Jawbreaker said through her cousin…
Bilan?
Rory asked, “Who is you, my nigga?” That ebonics made me dizzy. But seeing the next entry was my cousin, Brenda, blew my mind. She sent a picture of herself. In this image, Brenda didn’t appear as the asexual, nondescript person I knew her to be. Here, she was a clear lesbian. Full-on butch with her pose and hairstyle. I almost didn’t recognize her.
Rory replied, “I ‘ont no wut type a party u think this is but it ain’t this sus.” I blinked before reading it again. Brenda replied, “A’ight. I’ll see you at the fam reunion. LMFAO”
My stomach rippled. Brenda was strong-arming my husband’s security and assistant. I had no idea she was gay, much less capable of such boldness. It brought to mind Tasche telling me about Brenda frequenting her job. This was too much. Taking a deep breath, I handed the phone back to Rory.
Her smile slipped when she accepted it. “Tell ya people’s I ‘on’t get down like that.”
“Tell your boss you don’t want to drive me to the mall today,” I countered.
“It’s my job, B.”
“Don’t do me any favors. It’s not too late to arrange for a new driver.”
“I ‘on’t want you to. I wanna take you to the mall.” The letter “V” formed between her large eyes. “Chill. I wanna be cool again.”
“Again?” I snorted. “We were never cool. We learned to live with the fact you don’t like me, never did. But since then I’ve seen the truth in how you feel about me.”
Rory rolled her eyes, mumbling incoherent words through tight lips, resembling a teenaged urban boy. Then she tried calming herself as a new approach. “How I feel about you, B?”
“Oh, let’s not act like you don’t know. You never liked me, Rory. Since day one, you’ve been so cold, unlike how you are with Sadik’s exes. I’ve never been given a chance, only tolerated because your boss fell for me!”
“That ain’t exactly true.” Her eyes rolled again. “And don’t act like you ain’t slip and tell me what you really been thinking about me at Richards’ victory party. I peeped that shit.”
My head swung to the side. “What are you talking about?”
“When you called me the employee, or some shit. That shit was foul as hell!”
I recalled that. It was the first thing that came to mind that night when I was in a fit of anger, because it was what Earl referred to her as last fall when he popped up at my job for the first time. I hated that he used that term. I guessed it stuck because I said it at the victory party to hurt her, just the way she hurt me that night.
I turned away from her, lifting my chin dramatically, something I noticed I’d been doing for the first time in my life to Sadik. “You’ve made it clear that’s the relationship we’ve had all this time.”
“Fuck!” Her little body jerked as she shouted. “The fuck more you want from me, Bilan? I ain’t one of ya girls.”
“You’re damn right, you’re not! You’re far too cold and…mannish to ever be.”
She nodded at my words, eyes traveling away. “Nice. Now I’mma fuckin’ man,” she mumbled.
Embarrassed by that claim, I made clear, “I didn’t say that!” I was out of breath. “It’s just… Since I met him, you’ve made it clear I don’t fit into his world.”
“Maybe ‘cause you fuckin’ didn’t!” she shouted. “You ever think about that?”
“Of course, I have. Almost every day, I question whether I’m good enough for him! But it’s not up to y
ou to make me feel I don’t! It’s not your fucking business, Rory! I hope he doesn’t interfere in your personal life like—”
“That muthafucka is my personal life!” she spat back, leaping around. “That’s the part you can’t see. That man is my responsibility! Who the fuck you think go out to get you fuckin’…” she stalled quickly to think. “Chanel, La Perla, fresh fuckin’…polypropylene braided ropes, and shit? Who you think do that man’s research for Ellis International, his damn dispensaries, and the house he building for you? How you think luxury vacations get booked while he seduce ya ass like some pussy-fiend Romeo, or some shit? Who the fuck you think been quarterbackin’ shit in his life before he got a wife?” She pounded her chest. “Me!”
I rolled my eyes outside of the window, gazing over other parked fleet of luxury cars, trucks, buses, vans, and limos in the massive garage house.
“I’m sure you’re paid well,” I mumbled loud enough for her to hear.
“You think this shit about money?”
My head whipped, facing her again. “I’m sure I’m not far off! I know who I married.”
“And that’s my fuckin’ point, B! You married a complicated ass fuckin’ man. Nobody know that more than me. Maybe you right.” She nodded. “Maybe I ain’t think you was a good look for that man when you started coming around last year.”
Allowing my emotions a momentary slip, I asked, “And why not?”
“Because of how you is right now. You wanna cry, B, and I see that shit!” She neared me over the seat. “I’m fuckin’ paid well because I see that shit right in ya face.”
A tear slipped. “Fuck you, Rory! I’m a woman…with real feelings. You don’t know how it feels to love a man who’s beyond you!”
“And that’s my fuckin’ point, B!” Her hand shot out expressively. “Y’all wasn’t on the same page last year. You wasn’t thorough enough to handle the real Sadik Ellis. I was scared as shit that the man was pulling you in without a fuckin’ life vest. You know him now. You know his fuckin’ pops and how he move. I ain’t like that some girlie, jumpy ass bitch was getting so fuckin’ close to my ‘employer.’ Somebody that was scared of her own fuckin’ shadow. Him going to jail for some fuck shit don’t just fuck with his livelihood; it fucks with my life. That nigga is my life! I would die for that man to have freedom, fuck millions.” Her face tightened something ugly like a hardened criminal. Maybe Rory was and didn’t know. “I may as well put a bullet to my own fuckin’ head if that man ain’t good, yo! And you was just that type to run to the fuckin’ pigs at the first sight of some of his gray shit.”
“I didn’t!” I argued. “I may have run, but I never talked to anyone!”
“Yeah, but you fuckin’ ran with the nigga’s heart!” her shout was louder. “I ain’t never see my mans so fuckin’…hurt. Urgh!” she growled as though trying to contain her blooming rage. “I hate even speakin’ that weak shit!” Rory shook her head viciously, like a crazed woman. “You did shit to the man I ain’t even think was possible.”
At this point, my arms were crossed beneath my chest, effectively slipping into shutdown mode.
“Well, that doesn’t explain why you’re so nice to the ones before me.”
“I ain’t nice to nobody—”
“You called her Sofee!” I screamed at the top of my lungs. “Tiffany calls you to ask about my lover’s…my husband’s whereabouts while you’re carting me around. You don’t give them short, snippy responses like you do me. You don’t think that gives me the impression of intimacy between you and them?”
“I ain’t saying what it be givin’ you, but I damn sure know what I ‘on’t be giving them, what my boss ‘on’t give them bitches.”
My lips trembled as I ripped my gaze away from her. I swiped the tears from my face. “That still doesn’t explain why you’re so distant with me. I don’t even know your real name. You tried to give me the name of a wealthy woman in Paterson out in St. Justin.” It had taken a few days, but it had dawned on me out of nowhere that Rahdeah Smith was a well-known woman in Paterson. She was highly noted as a celebrity event planner who never left her roots. She had bought a home in The Manor’s section and was rumored to have armed security to prevent robberies. I felt foolish for not catching her lie that day. “You think I wouldn’t have figured—”
“Rokema Watkins!” she shouted again, flashing that short temper again. “You got my fuckin’ government. You happy now?” Rory snatched her small frame away, facing forward.
I ignored her mumbled string of expletives as she roared the engine. She’d upset me, and I needed a moment to collect myself. The ride to the mall was done with no words exchanged. Rory played her usual underground hip hop while I logged into my old school’s email.
Sunday night, after church, I’d used Jason’s credentials and gained access to the database he mentioned. It was a fruitless lead. Yes, there were more hits per word search combo, but all were pretty much the same I’d found via Google. The one interesting piece of information I did come across was about Hubert Jackson, the man Iban murdered, was the director of an alternative youth program for NJ Department of Corrections. Apparently, he was a tenured, tough warden of sorts.
When my undergrad inbox loaded on my phone, I was surprised to see I’d had over one hundred messages. When Sadik purchased this phone for me last spring, I never downloaded the school’s app, which would have given me quicker access as well as alerts for emails.
My jaw collapsed and I gasped. I slapped my hand to my mouth and glanced up to Rory to see if she’d caught my expression.
Half the emails were from Jason.
I’m emailing you because you haven’t answered my texts or calls. Hopefully you’ll see this.
Have you had the baby yet? Call me.
What’s going on over there? It’s past your due date. Please contact me.
Bilan, call me. It’s important.
I’d like to see you and the baby. Hit me up.
Please call me. Here’s my new number. I had to get it changed.
I saw the baby on Ellis’ sister’s IG. He’s beautiful like his mother. Please, please call me Bilan!
Still reaching out. Here’s my number again.
I’ve been trying to reach out to you. I went to Ellis’ place but they wouldn’t let me up. I need to see you.
My parents were in an accident. There’s something I need to talk to you about.
Sadik Ellis is dangerous. I need to talk to you. I’m concerned about you and the baby.
I shuddered a breath. Who knew Jason was this persistent? My heart broke for him. He had no idea the type of man whose life he was trying to infringe upon. I shook my head, eyes rolling out the window to passing, blurred trees. This had to stop. As much as I’d succumbed to my illness of accepting I was in love with a murderous man with a violent family, Jason didn’t know the half. He had no idea of how much of a risk he was putting himself at contacting me. I had to do something to put an end to this. I had to save Jason’s life without him knowing exactly what I was doing. I’d have to meet with him. Where and when was the question. Sadik would never be okay with it.
By the time we’d pulled up to the mall, I’d searched Rory’s real name in the database and learned a few new details on her. She was forty-five years old and had been in and out of correctional facilities from eleven years old until the last robbery stint just over fifteen years ago. It was my assumption her employment with Sadik began sometime after. The biggest kicker—other than her advanced age—was that one of the facilities Rory had visited was the same as Iban when they were underaged. It was the one Hubert Jackson ran until his death.
We pulled into a parking space and Rory cut the engine.
“Rory…”
She let go of the door handle and sat back, bracing herself. “Yeah, B.”
“You said you met Iban in a probation program.” She didn’t move to speak. “You two were locked up together in a juvenile program.” When she still wouldn’t re
ply, it angered me. “I guess you think I’m stupid along with jumpy and scary, huhn?”
Rory sucked her teeth, shouldering the door open with force. I left the car, too.
“The fuck!” she screamed like a teenaged quarterback. “What do you want from me, Bilan?”
“Why are you here?” I asked. “Why do I need you—no!” My hand shot into the air. “More specifically, who is attacking the family?”
Her eyes swept across the parking lot. “You know I can’t answer that?”
“Yeah. Right.” I snapped my fingers in a revelatory manner. “You’re just an employee.”
“Don’t fuckin’ try me, B!” She started my way.
“How did Iban only get four years for killing Hubert, and how did the law team the Ellises hired pull it off?”
She froze instantly, one leg ahead of the other, and Rory’s eyes enlarged impossibly. “That’s some shit between Sadik and Iban.” Huhn? Then her head cocked to the side. “You really tryna get me fired? You hate me that fuckin’ much, B? Word?” She seemed genuinely betrayed before taking off.
My eyes closed to a squeeze before I followed her toward the entrance. On the way, my phone pinged in my hand.
My Lover: How’s it going? You aren’t killing her are you?
I snorted before typing back.
Me: Not yet, but don’t be surprised if only one of us returns. BTW it was sneaky of you to not tell me she’d be my driver today.
That was mean. How in the world did I end up in a lifestyle that required drivers and personal security? It was an ungrateful comment I immediately regretted. It didn’t matter that Rory scanned around me again to make sure I was okay and that annoyed me…again. By the time I made it to the curb of the entrance, Sadik was texting back.
My Lover: Take it easy on my girl. She’s my top employee. And while you’re at it, I need a pack of Ase Garb trouser socks. Neiman carries them.
Me: I guess that means I’ll have to secure this victory and slay the turtle to ensure I return home tonight.
I dropped the phone to my hip after hitting send. Rory was holding the door open for me. Seconds later, my phone pinged again.
