by A. S Peavey
And when Kelsey could relax, she didn’t have to fear that Omar’s was the second cock in her this evening. Instead she could enjoy it. It drove her wild. She just wished Omar knew; she wanted to see him twice as horny at thoughts of her straying, she wanted him to imagine that she felt different because he had sloppy seconds.
Now was not the time.
But she enjoyed this fuck more for those thoughts. She wished it could have lasted forever.
They didn’t even get to embrace for long as Omar’s semen dripped out of her and mingled with the water of the shower. Omar didn’t have the stamina to keep standing. He pulled away and sat on the lip of the tub.
Kelsey knelt next to him, dropping her head onto his thigh, while letting her hand gently caress Omar’s cock a few inches away from her eyes.
“Shall I see if we can get a round two going?”
“God no,” Omar said. His soft cock still twitched. “I mean. Someone wants that. But I’m crashing. I won’t deny you if you’re desperate for more but…”
“No. Let’s go to bed.”
Hard Truths
“So, what’s the latest?”
Vickie’s question interrupted Kelsey’s wool-gathering, pulling her vision away from the coffee cup that she’d stared at more than drunk from—as if she could leech the caffeine out with her eyes.
Caffeine couldn’t offer her the pick-me-up that she wanted.
Kelsey looked up at Vickie. She didn’t answer immediately, even though Vickie had asked a simple question. How could she explain? How could she frame her thoughts?
That was her trouble, wasn’t it? She wanted to tell Omar. But she never could find the words—at least not words that she was willing to speak to anyone but herself and the bathroom mirror.
Ever since she caught her husband sleeping with another woman, she had known that she needed to speak to him. But ever since catching him, she’d grown hornier and more adventurous. It had driven her to her own affairs—even if those had never sounded as passionate as the sex she had overheard her husband having.
It would have been easier if Omar had discovered her watching. Awkward, yes. But at least they would have had the conversation.
“That bad, eh?”
“Well, the sex is fine. Better,” Kelsey said. “That isn’t the problem.”
“This with Omar? Or someone else?”
Kelsey thought she should have cared that Omar nearly noticed that a cock had preceded his into Kelsey’s pussy one evening. But that didn’t dissuade her from sleeping around. It made her a little more careful. But it also drove her to seek out other men. She wanted Omar to fuck her after another man again. And again.
Omar never noticed. If there were detectable signs, he was too horny to notice them. Her mere presence had become an aphrodisiac for him, where before she’d had to get his cock started, as often as not. A few times he commented on how he enjoyed this or that part of her body—something that other man had touched, where he might have left some mark. But he never made the connection to those earlier fucks—if the connection was real.
He never had reason to be suspicious.
In the month since Richard, she had fucked five men (beside her husband)—only three on evenings when her husband called to let her know that he’d be drinking with his colleagues. Kelsey hunted for the other two on nights when she was desperate for a two cock evening. She had called Omar, to say that she would be hanging out with her coworkers.
She never saw her coworkers outside work. No drinks, no movies. She would have gladly hung out, but for whatever reason, everyone in her office was tamer than the people in Omar’s office. Okay, some of the youngest employees got together for drinks—but even Vickie was too old for them. The only other outings were Saturday trips to the zoo, or similar events meant to give their kids an excuse to hang out.
But Kelsey told her husband there was a new employee who had decided to organize happy hours. Omar never pried for details. When she got home from those nights he only asked 1: “How was it?” and 2: “Are you too tired to fuck?” (Kelsey never was).
She’d nearly gave up on lying to create time to fuck men. The first time, she had felt unbearably guilty as that stranger enter her. Even guiltier the next day when she had time to reflect. Only then did she understand why she felt guilty.
She had taken away time from Omar—she was fucking a stranger when she might have been fucking Omar. She forced him to trade an evening with her for a boring evening alone, waiting for her to get back. She wouldn’t have felt guilty if her excuse was real. But she was guilty, since she gave Omar’s time to another man.
And, as if to make Kelsey feel worse, Omar was supportive, glad that she finally had a chance to hang out with her colleagues.
She only let herself set up a second night when she decided that Omar could use that time to enjoy his mistress. She hoped. Or lied to herself. It wasn’t actually likely that Omar’s mistress could be summoned on such short notice. But it was an easy lie for Kelsey, who was horny for a two cock night.
“Someone else. Kenji.”
“Kenji?” Vickie raised her eyebrows excitedly. “Was it something Kenji did afterward?”
“It wasn’t Kenji at all,” Kelsey said. “It was what I had to do on the way home. What that damn condom made me do.”
She’d felt the condom rupture, but told herself it was something else, something weird happening with her body. Shouldn’t that have been more disturbing? She’d lied to herself, denying that the condom could have broken. She lied because they were both so damned close to their orgasms. She didn’t want to stop and have Kenji put on another condom.
Not that that would have improved matters much. Even a little semen could get you pregnant. And Kelsey didn’t want to think about STDs. But at least Kenji seemed pretty innocent. Kelsey certainly wasn’t his first lover, but she would have been surprised—considering the lengths she had to undergo to seduce him—if Kenji had enjoyed a random hook up before.
“You had to get the morning after pill.”
Kelsey nodded. She’d stopped at the first pharmacy on the way home. She hadn’t even waited until leaving the store before downing the pill. That damned pill was all she could think about while Omar fucked her later that night.
“As if I’m not having enough trouble conceiving. And now this month is a wash.”
She’d have to fuck her husband all month, especially at the height of her cycle, while pretending that there was a chance that she could get pregnant.
Circumstances being different—if she wasn’t trying to get pregnant—she would have loved to come home with a lover’s semen in her and have her husband fuck her. It would have been exciting.
Except fresh semen would have been a little too much to expect Omar to overlook.
And she didn’t actually want to risk a disease.
“Probably not,” Vickie said.
“What?”
“You can still get pregnant.”
Kelsey narrowed her eyes.
“It’s true,” Vickie said. “The morning after pill can’t prevent future pregnancies. It can stop your egg from implanting, if it did get fertilized. But it might just delay ovulation. So, yeah, there’s still a chance Omar could get you pregnant.”
“How do you know all this?”
“In college I had a job as a health advisor—I was there to advise students concerned about their health, if they were afraid of seeing a doctor. Mostly I was there for people who had questions about sex, questions that were better addressed to a peer.”
“I bet you could tell some stories.”
“You wouldn’t believe half of what the other students got up to. I was tame by comparison.”
“So…”
“But I’m not telling them. Everything that was said was said in confidentiality, even though I wasn’t a doctor and didn’t have any legal duty to secrecy.”
“Well…”
“But we’re talking about you. You don’t seem re
lieved by the news.”
“I…” Kelsey paused. “I guess that just makes me feel…”
“Guilty?”
Kelsey shook her head. Not that she didn’t feel guilty. But she didn’t want to give Vickie an excuse to jump all over her, and tell her to talk to her husband. She rejected a handful of adjectives before starting from scratch over.
“It’s just making me more introspective, making me think about what I want.”
“And?”
Vickie was leaning halfway across the table, but otherwise she was content to wait, to give Kelsey time to consider what to say—or do—next.
Kelsey took a deep breath. And leaned in, swiftly before either she or Vickie could pull back.
For a few seconds the pair of them were kissing. Vickie got into it, opening her mouth, letting their tongues play. But for just a moment. Then Vickie pulled back. And she shot a skeptical glance at Kelsey.
“Where’d that come from?”
Kelsey had already been thinking sexual thoughts about Vickie. In part because sex with women would be less complicated. Less chance of getting a disease, no chance of getting pregnant.
Vickie’s revelation about the morning after pill hadn’t put the kibosh on that. Instead, it had lifted some of the weight off her shoulders, letting her libido run free.
“I’m looking for what I want.”
“No.” Vickie leaned back in the café booth, arms across her chest, before Kelsey could try again.
“Didn’t you like that?”
“What I thought wasn’t the point.”
Which meant Vickie had enjoyed it, but she didn’t want another kiss—or anything more. Kelsey had hoped the Vickie would take over. The younger woman had more diverse sexual experiences. She was certainly more forthright about sex, even if Kelsey had made strides to open up. It would have worked better if Vickie got caught up in the kiss and lead on from there.
But Vickie had more control. She wouldn’t get swept away by her passions if she didn’t want to.
“So you’re not happy with the men you’re fucking?” Vickie went on. “Your sex with your husband isn’t as passionate as you think it should be. And the sex you have with strange men isn’t even that good.”
“Well…” Kelsey began.
“So you think the problem is that you’re a lesbian hiding inside a heterosexual identity? I’ve got to tell you, if you’ve been happy in your marriage as long as you have, and this is your first time questioning your sexuality, you’re not a lesbian. Maybe you’re bi. The problem with your affairs comes from your mental state, not who you’re having an affair with. The problem is that you’re looking for that sex to meet some arbitrary standard, instead of looking to just have fun.”
While Vickie paused to gather her breath, to continue her huffing and puffing, Kelsey spoke up. “That didn’t turn you on? I thought part of why you agreed to meet with me, especially that first time, was because you’re attracted to me.”
Kelsey had slowly come to understand that about Vickie. But once she let herself consider fantasies involving the other woman, she started seeing the signs, past and present, that Vickie was interested in fucking Kelsey. Vickie had even joked about it during their first meeting, at least, Kelsey had decided it must be a joke.
Vickie hadn’t felt the urge to fuck Kelsey strongly enough to approach a married woman. But she had been caught up in the possibility.
“Frankly, your problem is that what you want needs to happen with your husband. It needs to come while he knows what you’ve been up to. If what you want isn’t just sex with him, it needs to at least be sex where he’s involved, at least by knowing about it. But you need to figure out how you want your husband involved. You don’t need to figure out who you’re attracted to, because you know you’re attracted to your husband.”
“But…”
“Is that right? Is that why you were thinking about sleeping with me?”
“It’s more than that. Really, it is.” But Kelsey knew that Vickie was, at least partially, right. “I have been thinking about this. With the way my thoughts are going, I must be interested in women. I’ve thought about them fucking me. You’re not the first woman to enter my fantasies.”
Vickie was just the first woman appear in a fantasy Kelsey might have acted on.
“Under the circumstances, I don’t know if that’s a guarantee of anything. It might just be another thing you think you’d enjoy but end up not liking.”
“I disagree. It’s worth trying.”
“Maybe. At some point.”
“So…?”
“So what?”
“So…Do you want to go somewhere?”
“Kelsey!”
“If it’s a problem with your boyfriend, we could include him.”
That was actually how Kelsey had started thinking about fucking Vickie. She was starting to feel guilty about setting up times to fuck behind her husband’s back. So she tried to limit her fantasies to her husband fucking his mistress. That hadn’t been enough. Her mind had strayed, to imagine watching Vickie and her boyfriend.
Kelsey thought she would get herself off to thoughts of Vickie’s boyfriend Cory, But for some reason, whether because Kelsey was bisexual, or because she actually knew Vickie and could barely picture Vickie’s boyfriend, Kelsey’s thought more about Vickie as she brought herself to orgasm.
“No. But…No. Look, you’re looking for this in the wrong place. Yeah, you could probably convince me to fuck you—I’d have fun. But that’s not the kind of fun you’re looking for.”
“But…”
“And frankly, that’s not the point in my relationship. We have sex with other people, because we’re fucking each other, and having fun at it, especially while talking about the other people we’re fucking. There’s nothing going on behind each other’s backs.”
“So you’re saying you’re not here because you’re attracted to me. That you wouldn’t like the chance to fuck me?”
Vickie rubbed her forehead.
“I thought so,” Kelsey continued. “It took a while for me to figure it out, because I was lying to myself about my sexuality, and everything else.”
Vickie took a deep breath. She leaned in across the table—careful not to lean in too far. She wanted to keep this quiet, but she didn’t want to give Kelsey another chance to kiss her. As it was, Kelsey leaned in.
Vickie had to put out her hand and push back the other woman’s shoulder to break up those puckered lips and make Kelsey look at her.
“No.”
“What if I do really want to…” Kelsey looked around. She was nervous about being overheard now, though she hadn’t worried before. Whether Vickie was right, whether or not what had activated her libido was the excitement of trying something new, and not the thought of Vickie, her libido had subsided. She cared once again if someone—even if only a stranger—overheard. “What if I really do want to have sex with you?”
“If that’s going to happen. If. It’s only after you talk to your husband. I’ve told you. Again and again. Talk to him.”
“And I’m horrible at that.”
“Force yourself to. Find a way to bring up the conversation. And, here’s the thing, find something that you can hold over yourself. Something you won’t do again until you’ve talked to your husband.”
“Like what?”
“Those candies you like, that I always see at your desk?” Vickie made a sour face. Kelsey had fallen in love with those candies in part because no one else would touch them, much less steal them when she wasn’t looking. “You don’t get to eat anymore until you talk to your husband.”
“Really.”
“Or, better yet. Maybe—I don’t know if you can—but maybe you should give up sleeping with other people until you’ve talked to your husband.”
As much as Kelsey hated to admit it, Vickie had a good idea. And now that Vickie had said it, Kelsey was forced to follow through.
She couldn’t keep fucking
other people and expect everything would turn out for the better. At least, she couldn’t fuck other people until she had the conversation with Omar. (Of course, there was no guarantee she would be able to sleep around afterward. But that was a bridge to be crossed later).
Put into words and spoken aloud, the idea exercised power over her. It’s self-evident truth apparently hadn’t been enough. But Vickie had forced her to confront the truth.
Kelsey had trouble even fantasizing about fucking anyone else. When an idea, or a sight, excited her imagination, Kelsey worked hard to bury her libidinous reaction. She certainly didn’t seek out excuses to excite herself and make her want to masturbate.
When Omar called to say that he as going to a bar after work, Kelsey went to a movie. And she went to the most innocent movie not aimed at a preteen audience. She thought about staying home in case her husband’s libido brought him home early again. But that way led fantasies she didn’t want to try to control.
Did she deserve even to fuck her husband with this secret hanging over her? She had made love to Omar since Vickie convinced her to force herself to have the conversation. But in this moment, when she knew she might have been fucking another man, she felt guilty even considering her husband rutting inside her.
Maybe Kelsey had been less likely to initiate sex, but when her husband got her horny, she wouldn’t hold back. Sex with him was as wild as ever. If it hadn’t been, Kelsey might have dropped her moral stand and slept with someone else.
But she still couldn’t convince herself to speak to him when an opportunity presented itself. She still didn’t know how to start the conversation. Simple ethics only got her so far.
She had sat across the dinner table and summoned a few words into her head. But she couldn’t speak them. She thought about raising the subject after sex, as Omar’s cock softened inside her for the first (or maybe second) time of the night. But other, better, ways to follow up their sex occurred to her.
The timing was never right. Kelsey didn’t want to ruin dinner. Later, she didn’t want to ruin the afterglow.
