***
Apart from Big Tam, who had always been more forward, none of us had done it with a girl. Big Tam had got talking to some of the older French soldiers – how I do not know, as he didn’t speak a word of French; I guessed there must be a universal sign for ‘where do I find the loose women?’. With only one night of leave in the last town before we reached the trenches, Big Tam wasn’t going to let it go to waste.
He marched us all down to the local cathouse and instructed us to pick a girl each. Tam went upstairs with the prettiest one and the rest of us just stood there red-faced, staring at our feet. Tam had told us how much it would cost, so when one of the girls came up to me, I just handed her the money and tried to get out of the door as fast as I could. She gently pulled me back and led me up the stairs. She took off my clothes, pushed me on to the bed and then undressed in front of me. I was far too excited – I mean my first sight of a naked woman! – and when she sat on top of me and started to move with my manhood inside her it was over for me in a few seconds. She lay next to me and stroked my chest, murmuring a few French words. It sounded sweet, but she could have been calling me a silly twat for all I knew. After a few moments she got up and handed me my clothes. I dressed and went downstairs to wait for the others. I was pleased that I didn’t have to wait long. When we walked back to camp, big Tam slapped us all on the back and told us jovially:
‘Now you are going to war like men, not like the silly girls you were yesterday.’
We did all have a bit of a spring in our step now, which some of the older soldiers noticed with great glee.
‘Look at them! The little buggers must’ve got lucky,’ one of them shouted.
As we neared our camp, Wee Tam suddenly piped up. ‘Any of you lads got any money left for a pint? I spend all mine on that hoor.’
‘We’ll go on the pish next leave, Tam,’ Malckie told him reassuringly. ‘I promise.’
On the 25 September 1915, Wee Tam and I saw our first and last battle and we never did get to have that pint.
Language in the Blood Page 3
