by Ivy Ruthven
“You think I can help?”
I nodded. “You can help by just showing up. They want someone to calm them and remove their fears. You owe them that.”
Ryan’s fists were balled on his knees. “I never wanted any of it. Neither did my mother.”
Placing a hand on his shoulder, I moved closer to him. “I know but if there’s something you could do, wouldn’t you do it?”
His head jerked up to look at me. “You want me to go?”
My voice cracked but I nodded. Tears were welling up in my eyes as I croaked the words out. “You must.”
Through a haze of tears, I watched his eyes watering as well. “Why must I sacrifice my happiness for strangers?” His voice was barely a whisper.
“Because you were born a prince. We can’t choose our family but we can choose what to do with our lives. And I know you, Ryan. I know you’d want to do the right thing in the end.” I gulped for more air to clear my throat. “This is the reason you’ve been so torn up inside. You know going back is the right thing to do. I’m the only reason you want to stay back.”
“I want to take you with me,” he said, capturing my hand in his.
“Perhaps, someday I will visit you in Islantia,” I said, wiping away my tears. “I’ll save up all the tips and buy a ticket to go see you.”
Ryan pulled me into his chest while I sobbed. I felt his tears dripping into my hair.
We remained that way for a long time. A weak sun rose in the sky but the chill within me didn’t disappear.
“You look tired, Olivia. Were you up all night reading?”
“Yeah,” I said, sitting up straighter. “I was so upset this morning that I didn’t even eat breakfast.”
“We should get you something to eat,” said Ryan. “The teashop?”
“No. They’ll know something’s wrong if they see me and I won’t be able to explain the real reason to them. Let’s go to Mama Nelson’s.”
“Oh? You know of that diner?”
“Stacie took me there.”
“I’m glad you have her for a friend.”
I nodded, standing up. We walked through the snow clogged streets to reach the diner. It was not as crowded as the weekend when I’d gone there with Stacie but it was still noisy.
He ordered me a plate of French toast while he sipped coffee. For a while I ate and he simply sat, looking around. Neither of us wanted to broach the subject of him leaving. I knew I’d burst into tears again if he did.
“Do you want to go back to school?” asked Ryan when I was done with my food.
“No. I can’t pretend to be happy today. My bedroom is the only place that I feel like going to.”
“I guess I’ll go home and let them know of my decision.” He sighed heavily. “They will be happy and going back to their families in good cheer.”
“How soon do they want you there?”
“This Christmas.”
It was already less than a week from Christmas. My heart squeezed painfully. I had planned to go to the Hawthorne ball with Ryan but even that wish would just be that…a wish.
“I’m sorry, Olivia. I really wanted to go to the ball with you.”
I nodded, unable to meet his eyes with tears clouding mine. “I think I’ll go to the teashop and start on an early shift. It’s better than going to school.”
“Should I come with you?”
“No…no. You go home and let Mr. Blackmoore know. Your presence in England during Christmas would make a huge difference to all the people.”
Pushing my chair, I stood up. “Bye,” I said, still looking away from him and literally ran out of there.
Jeanne and the others were surprised to see me show up to work earlier than when my shift began but the busy season kept them on their toes and they were grateful for the extra hand to help them out. Keeping engrossed into serving customers and keeping my mind on the orders, helped me not think of Ryan.
Towards the end of the shift, Bramble came out of her office to gather us all together in the locker room.
“Time to reveal Secret Santas!” she announced, bouncing on the balls of her shoes.
I had completely forgotten about it. However, the day was saved for me since I’d kept the gift in my locker a few weeks ago. It was the same hat and scarf that I’d found at the Christmas market in Oakwood Park.
Ryan and I had planned to go there skiing. Stop thinking about that now! I willed my mind to focus on my colleagues.
“I’m your Secret Santa, Judith,” said Jeanne, bringing out a box wrapped in shiny paper.
“Thank you,” said the elderly tea maker, taking it. “I am Secret Santa for you, Nicole.”
I went to my locket to get the gift bag. Taking it, I went up to Bramble.
“Oh my! You’re my Secret Santa?” she asked, beaming at me.
“Yeah,” I said, giving her the bag.
“I am yours!” she said, giving me a quick hug. She handed me an envelope. “This is my present. Happy Christmas!”
While she was busy wrapping the woolen scarf around her neck, I opened the envelope. It had a thick gold rectangular paper inside it. It said the “Golden Ticket”.
“What’s this?” I asked.
“That’s from Silvia Sinclair’s boutique. You get a pick of your choice of dress from her premium collection,” said Bramble.
“That’s very expensive,” I said, looking down at the golden piece of paper.
“It is also to thank you for looking after the shop, dear.” Before I could say anything, she turned towards Nicole and asked, “How do I look?”
“Nice and normal,” said Nicole. “For a change,” she mumbled under her breath.
“It’s cute,” said Jeanne.
“I’m not sure I can accept this, Bramble,” I said, looking at the woolen cap and scarf she now wore. It was nothing compared to a designer gown by Silvia Sinclair, the best designer and seamstress in Knightswood.
“You can,” pressed Bramble. “I didn’t know what to get you but then I heard you saying you got an invite to the Hawthorne Christmas ball. You need something special for an occasion like that.”
“Thank you,” I said slowly. A part of me wanted to be excited and celebrate this sudden turn of events. This meant I wouldn’t show up at the ball in something cheap and shabby. But without Ryan going with me, I wasn’t even sure I wanted to go.
“You’ll love it there,” said Bramble. “Have fun with your friends.”
“Yeah,” I muttered, suddenly feeling tired. “I guess I’ll go home now. Bye everyone.”
Everyone was still chatting loudly and discussing their Christmas plans, so I quietly changed out of my uniform and walked out of the teashop.
Chapter 15
The day of the Hawthorne ball arrived. It was a day before Christmas Eve. School was closed for the winter holidays. Even Bramble’s teashop had closed for three days.
Mother and I went down to Silvia’s boutique shop to get a gown for the occasion. A part of me worried whether Silvia would mention the night I and Ryan had visited her the first time but to my relief, she was too busy with all the customers to pay me much attention. After a lot of trials in the fitting room, we came away with a long, dark red satin dress.
Sarah helped me get dressed and fashioned my hair into an elegant bun. It was the style she wore on most occasions when we lived in Edinburgh. As I stared into the mirror, it was like looking at a younger version of my mother. Only our eyes differed. While mine were an emerald green like my father’s, hers was a soft brown.
“Use the red lipstick,” said Sarah, handing me one.
“Are you sure? I already look like a twenties actress,” I said, eyeing my reflection.
Sarah chuckled. Sighing, I coated my lips scarlet. The difference it made to my face was tremendous. I no longer looked seventeen.
“You’ve grown so much!” squealed Sarah. “I can’t believe it’s you.”
I continued to stare at myself. The dress was beautiful, m
y makeup flawless, my hair perfect. However, there was a heavy feeling within my chest. All this work to look pretty and Ryan wouldn’t be there to dance with me at the ball. Instead, I was going with James who’d agreed to go with me after a friend told him about the grand buffet dinner.
“What time is Stacie getting here?” asked Sarah.
“Six P.M. Is James ready yet?”
“He should be. I’ll go check on him.”
While my mother went to check on my brother, I took out my phone and clicked a selfie.
How do I look? I typed underneath it and sent it to Ryan. He was probably on his way to the airport by now. It was the date fixed for his departure to England.
A few seconds later, my phone buzzed. Picking it up, I swiped the screen.
You shouldn’t go to the Hawthorne Ball by yourself. In fact, don’t go anywhere looking like that.
I smiled, feeling warmth coming on to my cheek. My heart yearned to see him so much. It was like a constant ache to know he would no longer be there in Knightswood.
James is going with me. I’ll be fine. I miss you. I typed the text and sent it to him. A long sigh escaped me. I wanted to tell him I loved him but we never got the opportunity to say that to each other. There was still so much left to say to him.
I sat there, immersed in my thoughts when the door to my bedroom was flung open.
“What’re you doing, Oli? Didn’t you hear the car honking outside?” said James in a loud voice.
I turned towards him. He was dressed in a smart tuxedo and looked so handsome and serious that I was reminded of my father. Another pang crossed my heart. Swallowing the urge to cry, I stood up.
“I am ready. Let’s go.”
He bounded down the stairs. I had to be more careful on the stairs in my sleek stilettos and long dress. Sarah watched us go out.
Stacie’s father was driving us to the ball. He helped me get in the backseat. I sat there with Stacie while James took the seat beside Mr. Abbott.
“You look amazing, Olivia,” said Stacie, staring at me with wide eyes.
She looked pretty in a powder blue dress with a wide skirt. Her auburn curls were tightly wrapped in a high bun with loose curls framing her heart-shaped face.
“You look beautiful, Stacie,” I said.
“Doesn’t she?” said Mr. Abbott with a turn of his head. “My baby girl is all grown up.”
Stacie grinned, blushing brightly. She had a date with Peter who’d asked her to go with him before I could give her the invitation to the ball. Again, I wished for Ryan to be there and not flying towards England. Why didn’t I throw a tantrum and make him stay?
“It’s too bad Ryan caught flu. You guys would have looked so good together.” Her face did look sad. I felt bad for lying to her but no one in Knightswood knew the truth about Ryan. Only after he’d been introduced as the Crown Prince in England would everyone else get to know.
The car was now moving through an empty road with wide expanses of frozen fields on both sides of the road. The tops of the Hawthorne Manor were visible over the bare tree tops. Even from the distance, it looked an imposing building built in gray granite stone.
“How can anyone this rich be living in our town?” said Stacie, looking ahead.
James made a noise in his throat and turned around to look at me. I lifted a shoulder in response. It wasn’t like we could count ourselves as “rich” anymore. Another long sigh escaped me. Our lives had been a rollercoaster ride since last year. Now it was coming to an end and I still felt like an unseen current was carrying me away on its own whim.
Soon the car came to a half in front of tall black gates manned by heavy security.
“Show them your invitations, kids,” said Mr. Abbott. Both Stacie and I took them from our purses and handed it to the guard peering at us through the window.
The gates opened and the car moved ahead. The lawn stretched for out on both sides of the driveway. Tall, wrought pillars with globes of light at regular intervals illuminated the path.
The massive manor ahead was lit brightly. Every window sparkled with light. A stone fountain decorated stood near the main entrance. It provided a beautiful, serene sight.
Mr. Abbott helped both Stacie and me to get down from the car. “Have a great evening, girls,” he said, looking excited. “Text me whenever you’re ready and I’ll come and pick you.”
“Thanks, Dad,” said Stacie. “See you.”
James fell in step with us and we walked towards the open doors. Valets stood there, greeting each guest.
“This is like a dream,” whispered Stacie, clutching my arm painfully. “Thank you so much for getting me invited.”
“You’re welcome,” I said. “Let’s go inside and find Peter.”
James stepped forward and with the most uncharacteristic grim expression, extended his elbows towards us. Stacie and I took one and he led the way the forward. I couldn’t help but feel proud of my brother. He’d have made a brilliant gentleman had we remained in Society.
People were ushered through a brightly lit hall and into a bigger room where the party was gathered. A champagne fountain was stationed in the centre of the room. Sparkling jets shot upwards, catching the light from the many chandeliers hung on the ceiling. Waiters in red livery walked with trays loaded with delicate canapés.
“Wow,” breathed Stacie, looking all around.
It was impressive.
“It’s been so long since I’ve been at a proper party,” whispered James in my ear. I nodded.
Peter took Stacie away to a different corner of the large hall to dance while James and I stood in the corner. He’d already started eating.
“Aren’t you getting bored just standing there?” asked James through a mouthful of cake.
“No. I just want to be seen. No one can blame me for not coming and ruining their day that way.”
“You don’t sound happy,” he remarked. “Is it because Ryan isn’t here?”
“Yes,” I said through gritted teeth. “He was supposed to be here. But…”
“Do you seriously like him that much?”
I nodded, tears pricking my eyes.
He wiped his hands with a napkin and gave it to a passing waiter. Coming closer, he pulled me into an one-arm hug. “I’m sorry, Oli. You deserve some happiness. Too bad he caught flu.”
“Yeah.”
“Cheer up! Just be happy you didn’t catch the infection. He’ll be fine in a week.”
“Hello,” said a voice behind me.
Turning around, I saw it was Michael. “Hi,” I said. “It’s a lovely party. Thank you for inviting us.”
“My pleasure,” he said. Then he glanced at James. “Who’s this?”
“This is James. My brother.”
James shook his hand and with a goofy smile told him how great it was to be invited there. Michael grinned, exposing his fanged tooth.
“Would you care for a dance, Olivia?” Michael asked.
I hesitated.
“Of course, she will!” said James from beside me. “Go on, Oli.”
I glared at James but Michael was already extending his hand towards me. Denying would have been extremely rude under the situation, so I placed my hand in his and let him lead me to the dance floor.
A slow tune was being played by the live orchestra. Placing a hand behind my back, Michael led me into a dance. To my surprise, he was quite elegant and never stepped on my feet.
“You’re good,” I admitted, looking up at him.
“I’m glad the princess approves,” he said.
“Don’t call me that,” I chided.
He smiled in response. “I’d thought you’d be coming with your boyfriend.”
“He…he’s not well,” I said, forcing myself to lie again.
“That’s great! I get to keep you all to myself.” His gray eyes glinted while I scowled at him. Sniggering, he twirled me around. As the world flashed by, something caught my eyes. When I’d straightened, I looked aroun
d. It’d been someone very familiar.
“I can never take my eyes off you,” said Ryan’s voice.
I faltered, stopping in the dance. “Ryan?” He was standing there in a suit, looking at me with angry eyes. Was I dreaming?
“My turn,” he said through gritted, taking my hand and pulling it out of Michael’s grip. Before Michael could utter a word, he was dragging me away from the dance floor to a far corner of the room.
“What are you doing here?” I asked, stumbling after him.
“What were you doing with him?” he asked, his voice still thick with rage.
“Dancing,” I muttered.
He stopped and turned around to face me. “With him?”
“He requested it like a gentleman and James is here. There was nothing dangerous about it,” I said, glaring at him. “Besides, what are you doing here? Shouldn’t you be on a flight to England?”
“You shouldn’t have sent me that photo of you. I had to see you one last time. And to make sure Hawthorne kept his paws off you.”
I smiled despite myself. “You can’t keep doing that.”
His blue eyes pierced me. “I will…as long as I can. I’ll never stop protecting you.”
“There’s so much I must tell you, Ryan.”
“And I, you. Let’s dance.”
While we danced, I spoke up. “I love you.” It was just a simple statement but I felt my heart bursting with equal amounts of joy and sorrow. I gulped. Ryan leaned down and captured my lips in a long kiss.
“I love you, Olivia,” he said in a low, raspy voice. It sounded like he was close to tears himself.
“Promise me that this won’t be the last time we dance together,” I said suddenly. I no longer cared about the welfare of a million people. I just cared about him. And my heart. I didn’t care if I was being selfish.
“I promise you,” he said, his glance solemn and full of promise.
I closed the distance between us and kissed him. We probably just had a few hours to be together that evening but I was determined to make the best of it. It would have to last me the rest of the days I had to spend alone at Knightswood High. However, I didn’t allow sadness to mar these precious moments.
