Folding his arms across his chest, he glared at me. “If it means that you’re safer, then yeah, that’s exactly what I mean.”
I had opened my mouth to protest when Leisel stepped forward, interrupting our argument before it could even begin. “I think he has a point, Eve. I’d feel safer if we were all together.”
Huffing in annoyance, I rolled my eyes to the ceiling, pissed off that she had chosen to play that card on me. She knew I would never turn her down, that I would never dismiss how she felt. I always wanted her to feel safe; in fact, I needed her to.
“Fine,” I snapped. “Fine.”
• • •
The air was cooler outside, daytime giving way to early evening, abandoning the stifling heat of the sun in favor of the moon. It was quieter now, lights shining from inside several of the buildings.
This place was creepier now that nightfall was approaching, now that it was quieter and almost deserted, apart from the odd person scampering from one building to another. Shadows, big and black, cast on us as we traveled through what suddenly seemed eerily like a deserted town, tall structures towering over us from either side.
It somewhat freaked me out, feeling all too similar to when the outbreak had first begun. Our hometown had been busy, always bustling with life, until the infection had hit. Then all too soon it had grown quiet, each street seeming darker than the last.
This place—Purgatory—had not so long ago been teeming with life, yet with the setting of the sun had gone nearly silent. The only sound I could easily discern was a low beat, a mixture of bass and loud whispered words, coming from somewhere within one of the structures. I looked up at Alex to find his features creased with irritation, as if the music provoked him somehow, and with each step toward it, he seemed to grow even more standoffish.
Yet we continued to follow the beat, making our way through the winding paths between the buildings, hunting out the source of the noise until we found ourselves in front of a smaller building nestled between two of the larger ones.
I stared up at it in wonderment. I hadn’t heard music in such a long time, even in Fredericksville, for fear it would attract the infected. But these people were almost brazen with their noise levels. It scared me, yet at the same time, I couldn’t deny the excitement that welled inside me.
I turned to Alex and Leisel, finding the same wonder-filled, excited expression on her face, though Alex looked more pissed off than anything else, irritation still rolling off him in waves.
His hand was latched onto Leisel’s, their fingers interlocked. He surveyed the building warily, swallowing slowly, his Adam’s apple bobbing in his throat.
“We should get back to the room,” he said, already turning to leave and pulling Leisel along with him.
“Alex,” she protested, digging her heels into the ground.
“Really?” I snapped. “You’re going to leave? Just like that?”
He turned back, his shoulders already sagging in defeat as he glanced at Leisel and saw the disappointment creasing her features.
“It’s noisy in there,” he said, to which I rolled my eyes. “It could be dangerous. We don’t know these people.”
Snorting, I gestured toward the sky as I held my arms wide open. “Alex, look at where we are. This whole place is dangerous, this whole fucking world is dangerous!”
His mouth pressed into a thin, hard line. “This is different,” he said flatly. He was a man of so very little words, always using simple straightforward sentences, very rarely showing any sort of emotion, though right now I could tell I was pissing him off.
He looked down at Leisel, at her pleading expression, the one that had always gotten her exactly what she’d wanted when she’d been with Thomas. I held back a smile, waiting and watching as Alex’s willpower began to crumble.
“Please, Alex?” she whispered sweetly, too sweetly, even for Leisel. “We can just take a look around. We’ll leave if you don’t like it. I promise.”
Alex glanced between Leisel and me, and a frustrated noise erupted from the back of his throat. Frustrated, yet defeated.
“Fine,” he conceded unhappily, “but you stay next to me at all times.”
“Deal,” I answered. Even as much as I hated having to answer to anyone, I would do it if it meant I got to listen to music, for the first time in what seemed like forever.
Frowning at me, Alex shook his head and started for the door. Inside, it wasn’t dark like I had expected it to be. In fact, it was lit all along the hallway, as if the lighting was meant to lead us to an underground den. We followed the path down a flight of stairs, passing by other people, couples who barely gave us a second glance. Their eyes were glazed over, and their hands far too busy with each other to notice, or care, about our little trio.
At the end of a second hallway, the narrow space abruptly opened into a large, yet infinitely darker room, my eyes struggling to adjust to the dimmer, drearier lighting. Despite the size of the room, it was cramped, chokingly so in places, filled with bodies pressed against one another in a strange macabre dance, moving together in a perfect yet chaotic mayhem. Heat poured off the dancing crowd in waves, thick and stifling, yet the beat chilled me, the sounds of an earlier lifetime dancing eerily over my skin like a ghost, raising the hairs on my arms and the back of my neck.
When we reached the edge of the throbbing crowd, Alex grabbed hold of my hand as he edged closer to Leisel, pulling her tightly against him. I understood his fear. This place, it was strangely intoxicating. I could already sense it—the ambience—making us forget, pulling us apart. Suddenly, I was lonelier than ever in a room full of people.
“Can we dance?” Leisel shouted. Her eyes were round; she was obviously electrified by the sight. She’d always loved to dance, yet never in public. This would be a first for her…if Alex allowed it.
Before Alex could answer, the crowd surged against us, knocking us backward and separating my hand from Alex’s. Grabbing a nearby arm, I was easily able to regain my footing, yet I had lost sight of Alex and Leisel entirely.
I continued searching, pushing and shoving my way through the mass of people, sweaty bodies pressing up against me as sweat trailed down my back.
A warm breath danced against my ear. “You shouldn’t be here.”
Startled, I turned, shocked at the sight of pitch-black eyes meeting my own, eyes that seemed to suck the air straight from my lungs. He was a large man, twice my size, even taller than Alex. His arms were heavily tattooed with dark images that ran up and down the length of them. His neck was thicker than my thigh, his dark hair shaved into a short Mohawk that began at his widow’s peak, ending at his neck. A beard as dark as his hair framed a squared and hard jawline. All in all, he was an intimidating man, but it was his eyes that terrified me. They were an angry, dark, coal-burning black, with a deep-rooted intensity that made my stomach start to ache.
I glanced around, searching for Alex and Leisel but finding neither. Glancing back at the man, his features almost lost in the darkness, I swallowed hard.
“I can handle myself.”
A slow grin arose on his mouth. “Didn’t doubt it.”
Something like pride sparked to life inside me. Maybe it was what he’d said—believing that I could actually handle myself—or maybe it was the way he’d said it. Either way, I found myself smiling at the compliment, and my cheeks flushed.
Tilting his head, he gestured for me to follow him, and for some reason I did. Though I knew it was ridiculous to follow this man—a complete stranger, and an intimidating one at that—I couldn’t seem to stop myself.
Trailing after him, I watched his large frame move through the crowd as people everywhere hurriedly moved from his path. Who was he that they regarded him in such a way? Was it fear? Or was it respect?
We came to stop at a table, one of many set up in the far end of the room. He sat first, watching me as I emerged from the thick throng of people. Hot and sweaty, I wiped a hand across my forehead, feeling som
ewhat nervous, but infinitely more reckless. This place was a drug, an aphrodisiac tempting me on to a path that I knew was wrong.
Taking the seat opposite him, I watched as he laid his forearms on the table, enabling me to clearly see his many tattoos. Numerous skulls trailed up both his arms, disappearing under the sleeves of his T-shirt.
He seemed even bigger now that he was seated, his imposing stature engulfing both his chair and the small table between us. My eyes darted up to meet his, and I found him watching me intently with a strange expression on his face, a mixture of longing and anger.
“Lots of skulls,” I said lamely, my gaze dropping to his arms.
“One for every kill,” he said matter-of-factly, as if this was something every person did when they killed an infected.
My thoughts trailed off as my eyebrows rose. “Infected?” I asked. “Or people?”
His lips curved into a grin, yet he didn’t bother to respond. A scantily dressed woman appeared at our table, diverting his attention as she set down a drink in front of him. He picked up the glass and took a long swallow, then offered it to me.
I could smell it from where I sat, the bitter tang that emanated from all liquor, knowing that this was not the sort of man you simply took a drink from. He was dangerous; I knew that much just from looking at him. But as I continued to study him, I realized he wasn’t just dangerous, he literally radiated danger. Violence. From every pore on his skin, every taut, bulky muscle in his body.
And yet, I found myself reaching across the table, taking what he offered, then brought it to my lips and swallowed the burning, foul-smelling liquid. Feeling oddly like Alice in Wonderland, I licked a spilled drop from my bottom lip as the rest of the swallow burned a hot path down my throat.
“This one is mine.”
I glanced up, surprised to find Alex and Leisel standing beside me. Grabbing my arm, Alex pulled up my shirtsleeve, showing this man the brand on my wrist. My gaze flitted to Leisel, her big brown eyes watching me, radiating something like pity. I swallowed back a wave of shame. She knew me, knew how I worked, how I’d always worked, the things I did to fill the emptiness inside. Though my guilt and shame were obvious, my anger probably wasn’t. And I was suddenly so very angry.
Looking away, I found the man across from me glaring up at Alex before looking back at me. I shrugged apologetically, suddenly feeling like a moron for forgetting my place. It was imperative that the people here believed I did actually belong to Alex. For my own protection, and for Leisel’s.
Nostrils flaring wildly, the man pushed away from the table and cast hard glances at both Alex and me before walking off, his retreating form instantly swallowed by the pulsating crowd. Watching him, my chest began to ache—for the freedom he had, able to just get up and walk away. To get lost in a crowd, in the dark.
“We’re leaving,” Alex said, his expression one that brooked no argument. Neither Leisel nor I protested.
Chapter Twenty-Seven
Leisel
“Eve?” I whispered, nudging Evelyn’s shoulder lightly. An incomprehensible murmur slipped past her lips in response, signaling to me that she was sound asleep. Sighing, unable to sleep myself, I pushed up on the musty mattress and surveyed the dark room. Finding Alex seated upright in the armchair, his head lolling off to one side and his eyes closed, I rolled off the mattress and tiptoed carefully across the floor.
“Hey,” I whispered, bending down and placing my hand gently on his knee. Alex’s eyes flew open and he shot up and out of his chair, startling me and sending me falling backward.
“What?” he said loudly, his eyes darting wildly back and forth. “What’s wrong?”
“Nothing!” I whispered. Getting to my feet, I glared at him. “Shh! You’re going to wake Eve.”
As understanding dawned on his face, his shoulders relaxed and his panicked expression morphed to confusion. “Why are you awake?” he asked. “Are you okay?”
Reaching for him, I nodded slowly. “I couldn’t sleep,” I said, and fitted my body against his. His arms encircled me and he moved us backward as one, dropping back down onto the chair and bringing me with him.
Curling into his lap, I wound my arms around his neck and pressed a kiss to his jaw. “You’re starting to look like a mountain man,” I said softly, smiling against his beard.
“I don’t like it here,” he said in response as he stared off across the room. “I want to try and get as much as we can as quickly as we can, and then keep moving. I don’t trust this place.”
“It’s better than nothing.” I pulled away from him somewhat, disappointment coursing through me at his lack of response to my kiss.
I didn’t trust this place either, but as far as I could tell there were no forced marriages happening here, no religious zealots feeding the living to the dead. And the brand still stinging on my wrist gave me a sense of comfort I’d never thought possible from a tattoo. We each had to work to stay, to contribute, but we were able to carry weapons to protect ourselves, we had a bed to sleep on and the promise of food and water come tomorrow. It was almost too good to be true, yet I found myself not wanting to wait for the other shoe to drop, just for once to not be consumed by fear of the unknown.
Alex didn’t respond. His gaze remained fixed on the shadows cast by the moonlight on the opposite wall, but he lifted his hand and slipped it beneath the back of my shirt, settling it heavily on the small of my back. His warm, comforting touch caused a small sigh of pleasure to escape me. Arching my neck, I moved in to kiss him again as Evelyn emitted a small noise in her sleep, the springs in the mattress creaking loudly as she rolled over restlessly, then nestled herself against the wall.
“I’m worried about her,” I whispered, watching her legs twitch.
Alex’s gaze moved to her fidgety form. Frowning deeply, he shook his head. “She was stupid tonight.”
“You don’t understand her,” I whispered. “She needs…” I bit my bottom lip, unable to find the words to convey why Evelyn did the things she did without making her sound like a slut.
Though I knew Alex was right, she had been stupid tonight, I also recognized how lonely she was, still suffering from the loss of Jami. It was how she dealt with it, using men—using her body to fill the loss. It was how she kept going.
“No,” he said flatly. “I understand her. Jami wasn’t the first guard she hooked up with. And he wouldn’t have been the last. They all talked about her—”
“Don’t,” I snapped, sitting up straight and shrugging his hand off my back. “You don’t get to talk about her like that. You don’t understand her.”
Alex’s hard gaze focused on me. “Lei,” he said gently, “I get it. We all deal with shit differently. But she can’t do this here. She could get hurt. She could put us all in danger. That guy she was with, he was pissed. She should have been up front with him.”
Feeling calmer, I relaxed in his lap, nestling my head in the crook of his neck. “She doesn’t know who she is without a man,” I whispered. “It’s not her fault.”
Again, his hand found my back, traveling upward, higher than before, his fingertips lingering on each bump of my spine. I shivered slightly at his touch, wrapping my arm around his firm waist.
I still felt the same sort of restlessness as when we’d been on the road, itching for something more with Alex. But as he simply cuddled me closer, continuing his gentle exploration of my back, I knew I wasn’t going to get it, not without expressing exactly what it was I wanted. It would mean being bold, more so than I’d ever been before, and taking matters into my own hands, something I wasn’t used to doing when it came to the opposite sex.
“Get some sleep, Lei,” Alex murmured, then dropped his face into my hair. “We all need it.”
“Alex…” I pulled away, glancing up at him through my lashes, suddenly feeling foolish. When he glanced down at me, his gaze questioning, I swallowed hard and cleared my throat. “I don’t want to sleep,” I said, and pressed my fingertips into
his skin, willing him to understand. “We’re safe right now.” Glad for the darkness, glad that he couldn’t see the blush I could feel creeping up my neck, undoubtedly coloring my cheeks, I said, “Eve is asleep…”
Alex’s eyes met mine as a small, knowing smile curved his lips. His hand pulled free of my shirt and lifted to the back of my head, cupping it. I leaned forward, eager for his mouth, my own hand digging more deeply into the skin on his side.
Our mouths met softly, too softly for what I was feeling, and I instantly deepened the kiss while maneuvering my body until I was straddling him. The broken chair beneath us tilted precariously but I couldn’t have cared less; I was already lost to him, to what he made me feel when he was kissing me, touching me.
He grew hard beneath me, and the knowledge of that only furthered my want. Of their own accord my lips moved faster, my tongue delving deeper as I pulled his shirt up over his abdomen, then greedily ran my hands over the rippled muscles covering his stomach.
Alex had such a beautiful body, soft but hard, powerful and strong, and I needed more of it, needed more of him than he’d given me yet. Reaching between us, I fumbled with his belt, the desires of my body now overriding any embarrassment I’d felt. Continuing to kiss him, I pulled his belt open, softly rocking my hips over his.
“Lei.” Breaking our kiss, he circled his fingers around my wrists and pulled my hands from his pants.
Breathing hard, I blinked, focusing on his face. “Don’t,” I whispered. “Don’t make me stop again.”
Tears formed in my eyes, born of frustration without an outlet. I was instantly embarrassed, but more angry than anything. Twisting my arms in his hold, I tried to free myself, but his grip only tightened.
“Not with Eve in the room,” he said.
“She’s asleep!” I hissed. “She won’t care!”
“She will care,” he said. “You know she will.”
My body went lax, disappointment causing me to sink listlessly against him. He was right; she would care. And after tonight, with her being so careless with a strange man, if she happened to wake up…
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