by Tina Saxon
A sting-ray glides underneath me in the opposite direction. Those I don’t mind, it’s the sharks I don’t like to play with so I keep a watchful eye. I rise to the top, barely breaking the barrier to the open air and take a quick breath and lower again. The ocean floor drops and the darkness takes me back to many mission dives. Life felt easy then compared to now.
Something falling into the water grabs my attention. I stop swimming and focus on the object covered in bubbles. Craning my neck forward, I see it’s a person, swimming toward me so I kick my feet to move me to the surface. The person follows, but the red and white helicopter above our head, tells me who it is. Shit. Hello coast guard.
“Sir, you’re going to be okay,” he yells. I smirk at the ridiculousness of this. “Put this over your head.”
I shake my head and yell, “I’m fine. I’ll swim back.” Pointing back to the shore, I notice how far I swam. The beach is barely visible, so I think back to how many breaths I took.
“I need you to put this on.” The blades of the helicopter swoosh loudly making it hard to hear anything. He’s not letting me go, so I grab the harness and put it on quicker than he can do it himself. He stares at me for a moment and mumbles a few things to himself before lifting a thumb to pull me up. The cocky side of me wants to wave at him as we're being hoisted up, but I put it away. They’re doing their job and they do a damn good job too. I worked with a team out in California when I was training during BUD/S. I have the highest respect for them for putting their lives on the line to save people.
When we’re both pulled into the helicopter, I strip off the harness and all eyes are on me. Pulling my wet boxers away from my junk, I sit and strap in the seat. The crew looks at me confused. I flip my wrist around, showing my bone frog tattoo on my forearm since talking right now without a headset is useless.
“Son of a bitch,” I think one says.
They call it in as a false alarm and we breeze through the sky. One guy hands me a helmet. “Where are we dropping you off?” he asks over the headset.
“Just take me back to Base, I’ll catch a ride back from there.” They've wasted enough resources on me. The New Haven Station is located a few miles away. He smiles and shakes his head. I hold up my hands. “I was just taking a swim.”
“We got a call that a guy was trying to kill himself, jumping into the ocean and never surfacing.”
“I surfaced. Ten times.”
He rolls his eyes, shaking his head. “We’ll get you some clothes so you don’t make us all look bad.” I glance down and remember my clothes are still on the beach. I can picture the scene unfold, what everyone saw. No wonder they called it in.
Half an hour later, I’m dressed in a navy blue coast guard t-shirt and sweats. Thankfully, someone had an extra pair of flip-flops. My hands are in my pockets when the Commander approaches me.
He holds out his hand. "Commander Cooper."
I grasp his hand in a firm shake. “Kase Nixon.” He glances at my tattoo and looks back with a smirk.
“Sorry about rescuing you.”
I laugh out loud. He knows his guys didn’t rescue me. “Next time I take a swim, I’ll make an announcement.”
“Maybe not look like a desperate guy looking for a way out.” I run my hand through my hair, staring down at the flip-flops. The situation with Ellie hadn’t crossed my mind for the last couple of hours.
“It’s been a shitty day. I needed a release. Sorry for the confusion.”
He shrugs. “We all have our days.”
A guy I recognize by his tatts from the helicopter, walks up to us. “Your ride is here.”
My ride? I turn my attention to the Commander and he shakes his head. “We didn’t call anyone other than the local police to follow up on the original call.” Hope simmers wondering if it's Ellie.
“I’ll make sure to return these,” I say, tugging on my shirt.
“That’s all right. You can keep them to remind you of the day the coast guard rescued you.” The group of people around us laugh. He’s a funny guy. “You're welcome to come back here and give my guys a run for their money.” I might take him up on his offer.
I shake his hand and the men from the helicopter, thanking them for a job well done. When I walk outside, a bright blue corvette is waiting for me. Cody rolls his window down as I walk up.
“This is fucking epic.” Rolling my eyes, I flip him off, pull the door open and slide in. The tires peel out of the parking lot as we speed off. “You know if you needed someone to talk to, I’m always here for you.” With the shitty grin on his face, he’s far from being sincere. “I mean you didn’t have to pretend you were trying to drown yourself to get attention.”
I shake my head, letting him get his jokes in.
He puts his hand on my thigh. “I mean, I love you Kase, you’re one of the team.” I yank his hand off me, shaking my head and cursing through my chuckle. I hope to god none of the guys back on the SWAT team hear about this. This is nothing compared to the shit they’d give me.
“Will you watch the fucking road?” I say, pointing forward. Out of habit, I reach into my pocket to pull my phone out and I remember, it’s in the pocket of my shorts I dropped on the beach. “Dammit. My phone's in my shorts on the beach.”
“Nah. Officer Sloan picked ‘em up for you. As soon as he heard it was you, he grabbed your stuff and called us.” We’re back in Gilley Cove in no time. We swing by the police station first so I could pick up my stuff. When I hop back into the car, I scroll through my missed calls. Twenty of them. They’re all from Ellie and Tori. Fear ripples through me that she’s calling me to tell me goodbye. I press play to the first message left. Panic in her voice isn’t from her telling me goodbye. Shit. Shit. Shit. Pounding my head against the headrest, I make myself listen to the whole message.
“Kase, where are you? I’m worried sick. They said… they said the coast guard just pulled you out of the water, but no one is telling me where they took you! I love you Kase. Please call me back.”
Jesus Christ! This is turning into a nightmare. Each message is the same, except her panic escalates to where she can barely form a sentence. All the messages are within fifteen minutes. Then they stop. I glance over at Cody. “Did you talk to Ellie?”
“Yeah. She called us, hysterical. Damn, that woman frightens me. I tried to tell her you were okay without telling her details.” I tilt my head, surprised they didn’t take the opportunity to razz me. He shrugs with one shoulder. “We don’t give details. Ever,” he states matter-of-fact. I slap him on the shoulder and nod. “I told her I was picking you up, and that you were fine.”
“Can you drop me off at her apartment?”
I'm thinking positive thoughts when I reach her door. We're getting married. This is only a temporary setback. I tap lightly with my knuckles. The door swings open and Ellie flies into my arms.
“Kase!” I drop my bag and wrap my arms around her waist, digging my face into her neck. Taking in a deep breath of her scent, one I wondered if I’d ever inhale again, my world rights itself despite knowing she's only doing it out of fear. When she finally releases her arms from around my neck, she pulls back and punches me on the arm. “You scared me to death! I thought you had drowned, again! I saw them pull you up and then fly away. Nobody would tell me anything.” My lips pull into a smile at her pouty face. “It’s not funny.” She pushes out of my arms and walks into her apartment. I follow, shutting the door behind me.
“Babe, I promise you, the last way I'll die is from drowning.”
She rolls her eyes. “You keep saying that but a shark could have taken a bite.”
I laugh at how serious she is. I mean, she’s right, a shark could take me out, but the odds are thin. “Ellie, I’m okay.”
She lifts her brow as her eyes move up and down my body. “So… doing some on-the-job training,” she jokes, pointing to my outfit. “It’s kinda hot.”
I peek down at my coast guard attire and look back at her, appalled. I yan
k on my shirt. “You think this is hot?” Her beautiful lips twist and she nods. “You know I’m a SEAL, right? Nothing is hotter than that. Especially not the coast guard.” Like I said, I have the utmost respect for those guys, but if my woman is getting hot and bothered over them, it’s going down. “I’ll show you hot,” I murmur as I lift off the shirt and toss it on the floor. She bites her bottom lip, evoking a deep growl from the back of my throat. Her back hits the kitchen counter as I take a couple of long strides toward her. Her sweet gasp as I pick her up and set her on the counter goes straight to my dick.
“I love when you make that noise especially when my dick sinks into you,” I murmur into her neck. Her pulse quickens against my lips as I nibble up to her ear and back down her jaw line.
“Then stop talking, Cowboy. I need to feel you inside me.”
You don’t have to tell me twice. I’m an obedient guy when it comes to sex. She leans back on her arms, arching her back when I suck a nipple through her thin t-shirt. Her ass lifts off the counter a couple of inches, enough room for me to slide her shorts and panties off. I tug my sweats down, not caring to take them completely off. I’m afraid she'll change her mind if I don’t hurry. Tell me to leave when she figures out she’s doing this for the wrong reason. Fear and passion are a toxic mixture and I’m probably a bastard for taking advantage of it, but I need her to remember what we feel like together. That there’s no question how much I love her.
When my cock buries inside her, I close my eyes, relief spiraling around my spine, nothing feels more perfect than this. “I love you,” I whisper into her ear. She doesn’t say it back, only moans. Just for that, I make sure she’s screaming my name by the end.
I pull up my sweats, then lift her off the counter and carry her to the couch. I apologize for scaring her. She tells me about taking a walk on the beach to clear her head. Unfortunately, the timing was bad. When she saw a group of people staring at something in the water, she walked over only to see my clothes sprawled across the beach and me being lifted into the helicopter.
“I was about to kill someone, trying to find answers.”
Chuckling, I say, “I heard.”
She narrows her eyes. “He could have told me what happened. I was freaking out, and he wasn’t much help.” I nibble on her fingers. She yanks them back. “Stop. You should put me down as your emergency contact, so they’ll call and tell me what’s going on.”
“That won’t make a difference.” I push a piece of loose hair behind her ear. “The less you know, the better.”
“Well, that sucks.”
I nod in understanding, despite knowing it will never change. “Besides that, are we better?” Say, yes. Her hand rests on my thigh and I run my fingers in between hers, linking them. I know she loves me.
Although, she was quick to pull a knife on me this morning.
She looks at me with pain in her eyes, I’m afraid of what'll come out of her mouth. “Before we can move past this…” She pauses, inhaling and exhaling sharply. “… I want to meet her.”
That is exactly what I was afraid of.
Chapter Thirty
Ellie
“Welcome to Dallas Ft. Worth,” the pilot says over the intercom.
I stare down at the skyscrapers beneath us, lean my head against the window and sigh. My anxiety of coming back to Texas kept me up all night. I should have nothing to worry about, we’re far away from El Paso. Layer that with meeting my twin sister, my fiancé’s ex who he still has to have feelings for… it’s put a lot of weight on my heart. What if he sees her and decides she’s the one he wants? This is why we’re here, I keep reminding myself.
My mind hasn’t turned off since we left Gilley Cove. We barely talked on our flight. Kase is letting me figure things out internally and answering questions I’ve had along the way. It’s been a week since I learned I had a twin, but I’m just as confused about everything as I was on day one.
There’s one question that keeps popping up in my head though. We have a two-hour drive, so I figured I'd wait to ask when there weren't people around us.
Once we're in the rental car and driving, I tuck my foot under my knee and shift my body toward him, finally asking, “If she was the love of your life, why did you leave her?”
His fingers grip the steering wheel and he expels a pained breath. “I should have brought this up. But I was afraid I’d lose you after what you told me, about your stepfather.”
“I don’t understand.”
He sighs heavily. “You know my mom died from cancer when I was sixteen.” I nod and lay my hand on top of his, resting on the gearshift. “Once they diagnosed her, she didn’t suffer long. She suffered a lot longer by the hand of my dad. She wasn’t strong enough to leave my dad, so she stayed and took it, keeping it away from me. After she died, I was his punching bag until I became powerful enough to defend myself.” This breaks my heart, hearing we had similar upbringings. “I tried my best to stay away from him after that. I was usually with…” He stops mid-sentence.
“It’s all right. She was your childhood love. You don’t need to act like it didn’t happen.”
“I left right after graduation to go to boot camp. When I came back, I learned Everly had been in a bad car accident. I raced to her house only to discover she didn’t remember me. I was wiped from her memory.”
“That’s… horrible. I can’t imagine what that felt like to her and you. If I would have had amnesia, it would’ve been a blessing. Of course, I didn’t have a guy like you to forget.”
He manages a small smile.
“So, her memory never returned?”
“I don’t know. She never came looking for me.” I watch his shoulders tense and he adjusts himself in the seat, sitting taller. His eyes won’t meet mine. “After I left her house, I drove back home. My dad was drunk, like normal. He spewed about how no one would ever love me if they couldn’t remember me. Shit like that.”
“I’m sure it made you furious.” Unease rolls off him as he clenches his jaw.
“I couldn’t control my anger.” He takes in a deep breath, blowing it out through his nose, a bead of sweat falls from his forehead and he wipes it with the back of his hand. “Everly’s father was a police officer. He came to my house, searching for me. But it was too late.” I cover my mouth, trying to silence the gasp. His face jerks to the side. “I swear, I didn’t mean to kill him.” My heart squeezes with emotions from his admission. My worst fear is being with a man like my step-father, but Kase isn't like him. He's not like his dad. I can hear the shame, the regret, the unfounded guilt in his voice. I see a teenage boy trapped with an evil father like my stepfather, hurt and angry at life. It's how I spent my teenage years. Life is unfair. I dreamt every night about killing my stepfather, but I could never go through with it. For years I wondered if I fought back hard enough the night he left me for dead, it would’ve been him laying unconscious on the ground instead of me.
“He was a monster,” I say, reassuring him I understand.
“I should’ve been able to stop. After the years of abuse my mom went through, I was blind to any rationale.”
“I’m the last one to judge, Kase. I don’t think I would’ve been able to stop either.”
“Jake had to pull me off. He’s the reason I left. He didn’t like me, didn't think I was good enough for his daughter. So he gave me an ultimatum.”
“Leave or go to jail?” I whisper, stunned a grown man would do that, let alone a police officer.
He nods, opens his mouth to say something, but snaps it shut. For a man who demands control at all times, admitting this has to be killing him on the inside. Clearing his throat, he continues. “Nobody liked my dad in town. Jake and my mom were a thing in high school. My dad shows up, a stranger in a small town and my mom took a liking to him. Jake wasn’t happy and always had it in for him. I should’ve stayed and dealt with my mess, but I was a scared teenager given a way out. So, I took it and I haven’t been back since.” He swallow
s harshly, sniffs and wipes away his unwanted tears.
We need to turn around. The last thing I want is for him to find himself in trouble for returning. Worry is etched into his sharp features and guilt for making him take me here presses heavy against my chest. If I’d only known everything. “Kase,” I finally say. “I can do this by myself. You don’t need to go back and risk everything.”
He glances in his rearview mirror, flipping on his hazards to move to the shoulder. His lip quirks up and the tension in his shoulders relaxes some. “I’m not worried about that. At all. I’m here for you and I’m not leaving your side. Okay? I just needed you to know.”
I nod, turning in and kissing his hand that’s cupping my cheek. Not knowing how the next few hours will play out, I hold on to the hope we’ll survive this.
Chapter Thirty-One
Kase
As soon as I turn onto residential streets, we both quiet and stare at the smaller brick houses lining each side of the road, the anxiety in the space suffocating. Each one that passes by makes my stomach twist more. Why did I agree to this? I understand she wants to meet her sister, but this whole situation has me feeling out of sorts.
When Stone told me the address, it surprised me she doesn’t live in Barrow, but a few towns over. He also informed me she recently filed for divorce, and that’s where I stopped him. I don’t want to know. I’m here for Ellie, I’m not coming here to catch up with Everly. She forgot about me, and as much as that still stings, I’ve let it go and moved on.