“Springsteen is doing it,” I say and my father sends me a grateful look. “He’s been in New York for a few months, hasn’t he?”
“Prince, too,” Dad says. “Twenty-one shows in LA a few years ago. It’s becoming more common—bands that have the pull to bring in a lot fans, locals and tourists, can make it work.”
“And this is going to be enough for them?” Cash asks, still disbelieving. “They’re going to give up on a world tour and settle for twenty shows?”
This time Dad doesn’t meet anyone’s eyes, his gaze focused firmly on the opposite wall. “They would want to pair it with a special. Something they can sell to a network or distributor. HBO is interested.”
“They want us to do another live show?” I ask.
Levi shakes his head. “More like…a behind-the-scenes documentary—”
“No,” Daltrey says sharply. “We’re not doing a reality show.”
“It wouldn’t be like that,” Dad says. “We wouldn’t let it be.”
“And we’re just supposed to trust you,” Cash mutters.
Dad is silent for a long moment. “You can think what you like about me as a father, Cash,” he finally says, voice barely above a whisper. “But I have always been in your corner when it came to your careers. I’ve always fought for—”
“Yeah,” Reed snaps. “And that’s the problem, isn’t it? You only give a shit about our careers.”
Dad looks up, his eyes on Reed, and I feel my stomach lurch. He looks…God, he looks awful. Like he’s going to throw up or like he’d just taken a dozen punches. “That’s not true.”
“Like hell it isn’t.” Reed stands. “I don’t even know why we’re having this conversation,” he says. “If you think I’m going to do anything you say—”
“Reed,” Levi says, also standing to face him across the living room. “We can’t just ignore this situation. If we don’t give them something they could sue you.”
“You think we should do this?” Cash asks, looking at Levi. “This residency thing?”
Levi runs his hand through his hair. “I think no one in this room wants to go out on tour this year. Hell, I think touring would be bad for you, for a lot of reasons.”
Levi has the tact not to look at me, but I know I’m who he’s referring to. Fucked up Lennon might crack up out there. Again.
“If they’d be satisfied with a run of shows in LA…you could all be in one place. You could be settled.” He gestures at Daltrey. “It’d be easier for Daisy and the baby.” He shrugs. “It might be good for you. All of you.”
I run my hands over my scalp, trying to think clearly. It doesn’t sound that bad, to be honest. I’m renting a house in LA already, to be close to Haylee while her band is recording their album. Staying home and playing some shows? That sounds a hell of a lot easier than being on tour.
I look up, my eyes searching out Cash and Daltrey. Daltrey doesn’t look too happy about it. Cash doesn’t either, but he raises a questioning eyebrow at me, clearly wanting to know what I think before committing to a position.
“You’d have to leave Sam for a while,” I tell him. “But you’d be a lot closer to Seattle than if we were on the road.”
“Hang on,” Reed says, his voice very low. He’s staring between Cash and me, disbelief coloring his expression. “You’re actually considering this?”
“We have to consider it, Reed,” Cash says. “Levi is right, we can’t ignore it. We have to do something.”
“Fine,” Reed says, crossing his arms. “I’ve considered it. My answer is no.”
“Reed—”
He spins to face me, eyes blazing. “He’s manipulating us,” he says, gesturing at Dad. “He’s desperate to get us back to work.”
“I don’t think that’s true,” I say, and Reed throws up his hands.
“Ask him, then,” he yells, turning to our father. “The way I see it, we have a third option you didn’t mention.”
Dad watches him, his gaze level. “That’s true. You could tell them Ransom is on hiatus and do nothing.”
“And you would let that happen?” Reed asks, incredulous. “Give me a break.”
“Of course I would.” Dad sighs, running his hands through his hair, and I’m suddenly struck by how much he looks like Reed. “Hiatus is absolutely an option. If that’s what Lennon needs…or Daltrey and Daisy.” His eyes meet Reed’s again. “Or any of you. That would be your choice. And I would support it.”
“And if they sue us?” Reed challenges, still not believing him.
Dad shrugs. “We’d find good lawyers.” He turns to me. “It is an option, Son. We would be fine. You boys would be fine.”
Reed makes a disparaging noise, obviously about to argue, but Dad stands, cutting him off. “I’m going to go,” he says. “I think you need to talk and that will obviously be easier for you to do if I’m not here.” He looks at Daltrey and a muscle in his jaw twitches. “Would you mind if…could I see her?”
Daltrey stares up at him, mouth open a little in surprise. Finally he clears his throat and stands. “Sure. She’s asleep right now but—”
“That’s fine,” Dad says, looking away. He’s clearly embarrassed, but he follows Daltrey out of the room and upstairs.
“I need a beer,” Cash mutters, looking at the rest of us. “You want—”
“I’ll be outside,” Reed snaps, stomping off towards the kitchen.
Cash sighs. “Such a ray of sunshine, that guy.”
Levi excuses himself to make a phone call, but I get the feeling he wants to give us some privacy. Or maybe he’s trying to avoid going after Reed to shake some sense into him. I join Cash at the dining table, reaching for a beer. “What do you think?”
Cash shrugs. “God. I don’t know. It doesn’t sound too bad, honestly. It would be nice to hang out in LA for a while.”
“What about Sam?”
“She’s almost done with her internship. We could make it work. A lot easier than if we were on the road.” His face brightens a little. “Wyatt really liked LA when we came to visit you guys. I wouldn’t mind him spending some more time there.” He raises his eyebrows. “What do you think?”
“I think it’s probably our best option,” I say. “But…I don’t think we’re gonna get Reed to see it that way.”
“He’s so pissed,” Cash says, his voice soft as he looks to the back door through which Reed disappeared. “Do you see how he’s acting with Paige?”
“I know,” I say. “It’s screwed up.”
“I don’t get it,” Cash says. “I mean, I understand that he’s mad at Dad. We’re all mad at Dad. But he’s taking it so personal.”
I take a long sip of my beer. “He worshipped Dad,” I finally say. “After London he told me…he said it feels like he’s lost both his parents.”
“Jesus,” Cash mutters, rubbing the back of his neck. “Probably doesn’t help that he’s old enough to…you know…remember Mom.”
I glance at him sharply. Even after I told my brothers that I’d been to see our mother back in Europe, we rarely ever talk about her. For as long as I can remember, her name has been virtually forbidden in our house.
“You don’t remember her?” I ask Cash.
He looks uncomfortable. “I do. But a lot of it is fuzzy.” He glances back to the kitchen. “It was always different for Reed.”
“Yeah.”
We stand there in silence for a long moment, drinking our beers. I’m trying not to think about that little house outside of Paris where I found our mother. Trying not to think of all the repressed memories that visit had brought back to me. Mostly trying not to think about how much I had wished she would hug me, as angry as I was at her—I’d still wanted to feel her touch me.
“Where’s Reed?” Daltrey asks, coming down the stairs behind Dad.
“Outside,” Cash says. “He’s in a great mood.”
Dad sighs. “I’m sorry.” His eyes travel from Cash to Daltrey and finally to me. “I know that
I…” he trails off, shoving his hands into his pockets. “I meant what I said, okay? Whatever you decide is fine.”
“Thanks,” Cash says, his voice a little husky. He isn’t meeting Dad’s eyes, but he no longer looks like he wants to punch the man, either.
“We’ll call you,” I tell Dad. “After we talk.”
He nods. He looks like he wants to say more—his hand actually comes out, like he might be reaching for something, but he quickly shoves it back in his pocket. “Good luck,” he finally says, heading to the front door.
After he’s gone, Cash, Daltrey, and I just look at each other. “Well,” Daltrey finally says, his expression grim. “I guess we need to talk.”
Cash
Reed’s time outside doesn’t seem to have helped with his mood. When he comes back into the room and sees that Paige, Karen, and Daisy have joined us, he scowls.
Daltrey scowls back. “If you think I’m having this conversation without Daisy’s input, you’re crazy.”
And why in the hell would Reed want to have it without Paige’s? I don’t miss the way her face tightens at the sight of her boyfriend.
“He’s going to fuck this up,” I mutter to Lennon, who also seems to be watching Paige. “The best thing that ever happened to him and he’s going to fuck it up.”
“We won’t let him,” Lennon tells me, but he doesn’t sound so confident.
“I don’t really know what there is to talk about,” Reed says, sitting down as far away from the rest of us as he can get. “I’m not doing this just because Dad wants us to.”
“I’m not doing it because Dad wants us to either,” I say. “But I am considering it because I think it might be our best option. And that has nothing to do with Dad.”
Reed lets out a frustrated noise. “Of course it has to do with Dad—”
“Look,” I go on, starting to get pissed now. “I get that you’re upset and you don’t want to spend time with our father—”
“Damn right I don’t,” Reed snaps.
I sigh, looking to Lennon as if to say you try.
“Stop thinking about Dad,” Lennon says. “Think about us. Think about Ransom. What do you think is the best thing for the band? What do you want to do?”
Reed crosses his arms, eyes on the floor, and doesn’t respond.
“I might kill him before this is over,” I say softly enough that only Lennon can hear.
“What do you think?” Lennon asks, turning to Daisy and Daltrey.
“Honestly?” Daltrey asks. “I would rather stay here.” He looks at Daisy. “It’s good for us. It’s good for the baby.”
“It’s also far away from everyone,” Daisy counters. “From your brothers, my friends. They only get to see Rose every few weeks.” She shrugs. “It might be kind of nice, all of us in the same city for once. That hasn’t happened in a while.”
“Are you crazy?” Reed snaps. “We spend nine months of the year on a tour bus together.”
I’m pretty sure that Daltrey is about to lunge at Reed for talking to Daisy like that, but she holds her own, crossing her arms and fixing a glare on him. “Believe me, Reed, I have no desire to be on a tour bus with your grumpy ass right now. The only reason I’m even considering this is because we’d all be able to stay in our own houses.”
Reed looks away. “Sorry I snapped,” he mutters.
Daisy’s expression softens. “I know.”
The room is silent for a few moments. Finally Levi looks at Lennon. “What do you think, Len?”
Lennon keeps his attention on his beer bottle. “I’m already staying in LA,” he says. “I wouldn’t mind if I got to play music while I’m there.”
“It has been a while,” I say. Then my chest tightens with familiar worry. “Do you think you’re up for it?”
Lennon starts to peel the label from his bottle, seemingly determined not to look at us. “I’m feeling pretty good these days.”
“But the stress of shows,” Daltrey says, and I hear my worry reflected back in his voice. “I don’t know if that would be good for you.”
There’s a twitch by Lennon’s eye and I wonder what he’s thinking about, wonder how hard this is for him, for all of us to be talking so openly about his issues. But he told us, back in London, that we had to start talking more. That it was the only way he’d be able to deal with this. And that has to go for him too. He has to be able to talk to us, even if it’s hard.
Lennon releases a long breath. “I don’t know,” he says, meeting Daltrey’s eyes. “Maybe it will make me freak out again. I can’t promise you anything.”
Daltrey frowns. “Then we shouldn’t—”
But Lennon isn’t done. “But I have to try,” he says. “I’m not ready to retire.” He manages a small smile at that. “I’m twenty-four years old, for God’s sake. And I’m not ready to give up on music.”
“You can have a life in music without high stakes performances,” I tell him.
“Yeah, but I like high stakes performances,” Lennon says. “You’re not the only one who likes a huge venue full of fans screaming for you, dude.”
I grin at him. “I do miss that.”
“Look.” Lennon runs his hands through his hair. “I’m never going to know what I can handle if I don’t try.”
“You tried in Europe,” Levi says, his voice low.
“A lot has changed since then.” Len shrugs. “Honestly, if I’m going to try performing again, this might be the best way. I’ll be near Haylee, at least until they go on the road. You guys will be close by. I’ll be settled in my own house.”
The room is quiet. “If you think it will be good for you,” I finally begin, but Lennon cuts me off, his eyes on Reed, who won’t look at him.
“I also think it might be good for us—all of us—to be together right now. In London we said we were going to try talking more. And then we came home and pretty much split up in four different directions.”
“Len, you know I’m here for you,” I say, a flash of panic shooting through me. He knows that, doesn’t he?
Lennon rolls his eyes. “Yeah, Cash, I know. Your daily check in phone call and hourly texts have been ample proof of that.” I roll my eyes right back and he smirks at me before clearing his throat. “I’m not only talking about me.” He stares at Reed. “I’m not the only one having a hard time.”
Finally Reed looks up at him, eyes flashing. “You have something to say to me, Lennon?”
Lennon straightens his shoulders. “I think it would be good for you if your brothers were nearby.”
Reed snorts. “I’m fine.”
“Oh, yeah,” I say. “You’re obviously fine.”
Reed jumps to his feet and Daisy closes her eyes, like she knows what’s coming.
“You want to say that to my face, Cash?”
“Sure,” I say, already out of my chair and moving forward. “You’re being an asshole, Reed.”
“You’re not fighting in my house,” Daisy says, nudging Daltrey. “Go stop them.”
“I’m not getting in the middle of that,” Daltrey says.
“Reed,” Paige begins, but he ignores her, pushing me, and my anger grows. He can take this out on me if he wants to, but he’s not going to take it out on Paige.
“Get out of my face,” Reed says, his voice harsh.
“I don’t think I will,” I say cheerfully.
“I can’t believe you guys actually want to do this,” Reed says, looking from me to the others. “Don’t you see what Dad’s doing?”
“He’s not doing anything,” Levi says and Reed spins to face him.
“Stop defending him!” he yells. “He’s not your fucking father, Levi!”
The color seems to leech from Levi’s face. Damn it, Reed.
“I know that,” Levi says softly. And now Karen is glaring at Reed too, her hands in tight fists on her knees.
“Why are you even here?” Reed snarls at our friend. “You’re not a member of this family.”
T
hat’s the last straw. “Reed,” I bark, letting the anger seep into my voice. “That’s enough. You’re not taking this out on Levi. Or Paige. Or any of us.”
Reed rubs his forehead and I’m pretty sure his hands are shaking. Jesus. I’m not sure I’ve ever seen my older brother quite like this.
“I’m not going to let him do this,” Reed mutters, almost to himself. “I’m not going to let him win.”
“It’s not about Dad!”
“Yes it is!” Reed yells back. “He’s trying to get his claws back in us.” He looks around at us, breathing heavily. “How do you not see that?”
When no one responds he lets out a noise that sounds an awful lot like a growl. “I don’t believe you. Any of you. How stupid can you be?”
“Hey,” I say, getting up in my brother’s face, trying to decide the best place to slug him, just like I’ve done a hundred times. Then another thought occurs to me and I smile. “You remember that time I kissed Paige?”
“What?”
I just grin at him. “That really pissed you off, didn’t it?”
“Why are you…what the fuck, Cash?” Reed yells. I continue to smile, my face still awfully close to my brother, definitely within swinging distance. Then Reed blinks. “Are you trying to get me to punch you?”
“I am,” I say, in my cheeriest voice.
Reed stares at me, eyes wide. “Why?”
I shrug. “Thought it might make you feel better.”
Lennon bursts into laughter. “Oh, my God,” he mutters, rubbing his eyes.
“Great, now you have Lennon going nuts,” Daltrey mutters.
“He’s laughing because you’re all idiots,” Daisy says, pushing her fiancé. “Completely ridiculous children. I, for one, don’t blame him.”
Reed collapses back into his chair, shaking his head. I stay at his side, looking down at him. “I think Lennon is right,” I say. “I think it would be good for you to have your brothers nearby.”
Reed’s silent for a long moment. “You really want to do this?” he finally asks, looking up at me.
“Do you want to get sued?” I shake my head. “Seriously, Reed. I thought you of all people would be freaked out by that.”
The Ransome Brothers_A Ransom Novel Page 9
