“Your given name is Jonathan?”
Jack’s eyes snapped to Lily. “Yes.”
She took his arm once more and pulled him along, though he struggled to put one foot in front of the other. Walking had not seemed a difficult thing on his own, but with her so near, he couldn't remember how to perform that rudimentary action.
She sighed, and though it was not the type of sound one wanted to hear from their betrothed, Jack couldn’t say he was bothered by it, either. Resignation was not happiness, but he had time to change it.
“I cannot call you Hatch or Hatcher,” Lily said with a frown. “That is all well and good for men to call you either of those, but I think it strange for me to do the same.”
She paused, and Jack kept only a slight amount of attention to their path, turning the majority of it onto Lily as he awaited her next words.
“And you do not look like a Jonathan,” she mumbled, more to herself than to him, but she straightened and glanced at him with an apologetic smile. “I mean no offense.”
“None taken.” He’d never cared for it, so he could not fault her for disliking the name as well.
Lily’s gaze turned to the world ahead of them, but her attention was far from it as she delved deep into her thoughts. Watching it was quite entertaining, for the lady was quite the thinker and spent much time lost in her head. Of course, she enjoyed speaking those thoughts aloud as well, and Jack found himself intrigued about what would come out next.
“Jack,” she said.
His brows shot upwards.
“That seems fitting.”
His heart clenched in his chest, and his breath quickened. That was a name he’d not heard in many years. No one called him Jack anymore.
“You don’t care for it?” asked Lily with a frown.
“No.”
Lily gave a curt nod and looked away, her hold on his arm loosening. Jack’s mind sped through the words she’d spoken and his answer, realizing far too late what he’d said.
“Yes,” he amended.
He stopped again, struggling to get his thoughts to form a coherent statement. How did he explain such a large emotion in words? “Jack” reminded him of home and family. It brought with it a myriad of memories and happiness. Of catching frogs in Mr. Bedford’s pond and running along the heathered moors. Of eating toast and cheese by the fire with his family as the snow fell in fat flakes that covered the countryside. Of a world untainted by death and cruelty.
It was a name from a previous life.
“Call me Jack.” That was all he managed to say. She had cast that option out like it was merely a good idea, but it was more than that. Fairly growling at himself, he pieced together possible things to say, scouring his thoughts for words that could explain to Lily how much it meant to him that she had suggested it and how he longed to hear it on her lips.
“I like Jack.” And that was the best he could do. Speaking was not a difficult thing, but for all his ability to negotiate business, Jack couldn’t manage a simple courtship. Of course, it was difficult to focus when his heart felt like molten iron in his chest.
“Then Jack it is,” she said with a decisive nod.
Chapter 15
From his place behind a tree, Colin watched the group of ladies strolling through the park and felt like a common footpad, lurking in wait. But that was his only recourse—to watch and wait, choosing his moment with precision.
Miss Aubrey was in fine form today, though Colin could not think of a single time when she was anything but in fine form. It was that fine form that had him so entranced. And the curve of her soft lips as she smiled. The lightness in her eyes when she laughed. The utter perfection of Miss Aubrey was visible even from this distance.
Seeing her in the flesh was a bittersweet agony, and Colin finally understood the scores of soppy poetry that expounded on the wretched misery found in a love never to be. Of course, that did not keep him from hoping that this romance was not a tragedy in disguise.
Miss Aubrey’s head turned, catching just the barest hint of him, but her breath caught. Sending out a silent plea, he hoped she would find some excuse—any excuse—to join him. Though too far away to hear their conversation, he watched as Miss Aubrey gave a few friendly smiles and jovial words before turning away from the group.
“Just a moment, Mama!” she said, calling from over her shoulder. “I must speak with Miss Jameson.”
Colin could hardly hold himself steady as she hurried along the path, her footsteps coming faster as she drew near. Holding out his hand, he just about shouted with joy when hers slid into his, and he pulled her behind the tree.
“What are you doing here?” she asked with a smile, throwing her arms around his neck and burrowing into his hold with a contented sigh.
If only they could stand there and enjoy such a lovely moment, but with the park filling, they were bound to be noticed.
“We must be careful, darling,” he said, pressing a kiss to her temple.
Lifting her head to gaze into his eyes, her chin trembled. “I cannot keep doing this, Colin. It breaks my heart.”
“I know,” he said, reaching a hand to brush her cheek. How he wished he were not wearing gloves and could feel her soft skin.
Tears gathered in her eyes, and panic shot through Colin. He couldn't understand how those tiny things held such sway over him, but the very sight of them made his heart constrict and his resolve crumble.
“Please, do not cry, dearest,” he said, wiping at the tears as they fell. “I will find a way for us to be together. I will.”
“Can you not speak to Papa?” she asked.
“And ask him to give his beloved daughter to a gentleman who has nothing but his useless name to recommend him?” said Colin with a huff. “If he had any sense, he would have me drawn and quartered.”
At the sounds of footsteps drawing closer, Miss Aubrey straightened, though she allowed her hands to rest on his chest, lingering there as both their hearts fought against propriety and caution. Finally, she pulled free of his touch, her face cast downwards, and only the strongest sense of duty and honor kept Colin from sweeping her into his embrace until she smiled and laughed once more.
“I will find a way,” he said. Reaching into his pocket, he pulled out two flowers whose stems were bound together; a vine of honeysuckles entwined a small sprig of blue Canterbury bell flowers. Though he did not have the right to declare the depths of his affections aloud, those blossoms spoke for him. Constancy and the bonds of love gathered together. They were the perfect message for his dear Miss Aubrey.
Taking them in hand, she drew them to her nose, the silken petals brushing her nose, and she breathed in their scent. Her brown eyes captured his, her gaze telling him what her lips could not. There would be vows of undying love. At present, the flowers were the only words they were allowed, and it had to be enough.
For now.
“Miss Aubrey?” called one of the ladies.
“Coming!” she replied, her eyes holding firm to Colin.
They stood thusly for several quiet moments before Miss Aubrey finally compelled herself to leave, her gloved hand brushing against his in farewell. And Colin watched her slow steps, his heart sinking with each one.
As he stood there, cowering behind the tree like the coward he was, Colin caught sight of another pair of lovers walking along the park’s path, and his heart constricted again—but for a far more unpleasant reason.
Hatch held Miss Kingsley’s basket and had her by the arm as the pair strolled along with the freedom their enviable state allowed. His heart burned in his chest like a flaming coal as he watched the couple. Fate had such a cruel sense of humor to flout Hatch’s forced engagement in front of a man who wanted nothing more than to be engaged to the lady pretending that her heart wasn’t breaking as the gaggle of ladies around her laughed and chatted.
Colin would not allow fate to be so cruel to him and Miss Aubrey nor so kind to the likes of Jonathan Hatcher. Perhaps today w
ould be a good time to show his hand.
The couple meandered through the park, and Colin followed a few paces behind, choosing his time carefully. Miss Kingsley gave a broad smile, beaming at her companion as though Hatch were especially amusing. Truth be told, there were moments when Colin had enjoyed Hatch’s dry wit, but he thought it quite odd for Miss Kingsley to be so diverted. Even more odd was the lightening of Hatch’s expression as he glanced at the lady on his arm. It was not a smile per se, but as much of one as Hatch was won’t to give.
This was not a good development.
“Miss Kingsley,” said Colin, hurrying to catch them with a quick bow.
“Mr. DeVere,” she said, pulling Hatch to a stop. Though she did not smile quite so broadly at his approach, there was still a spark of joy in her eyes as he came to a stop before the pair.
“Midshipman DeVere?” Hatch’s eyebrows rose, and he freed his arm from Miss Kingsley so that he could grip Colin’s hand in a firm handshake. “I thought you were bound for America.”
Colin had not thought Hatch one for play-acting, but he was doing a superb job of it. Of course, the bounder would not acknowledge that this reunion was anything but pleasant.
“Emigrating was not the best course of action, so I remained in Town,” said Colin. There was no enticement great enough to pull him so far from Miss Aubrey.
“You are acquainted?” asked Miss Kingsley, glancing between the pair.
“We served together on my last ship,” said Hatch.
Jaw aching, Colin forced it to unclench while keeping a pleasant smile on his face. He didn’t know why he should be surprised that Hatch would gloss over so much of their history together, but now was not the time to broach that subject.
Hatch threaded Miss Kingsley’s arm through his once more, and Colin forced himself not to snort in derision. It was so like Hatch to stake his claim in such a public manner, but he was a fool if he thought it would keep Miss Kingsley by his side.
Colin’s smile broadened, his eyes warming as he looked at Lily. “When I saw you walking through the park, I could not waste the opportunity to spend a few minutes in your company. I am crushed that you were otherwise occupied this afternoon. A drive is so much more engaging with a lovely lady at my side.”
Miss Kingsley’s cheeks heated, her eyes dropped away from Colin’s, and though he noted the pleased smile on her lips, it was Hatch’s dark scowl that held Colin’s attention.
“You are ridiculous, Mr. DeVere,” said Miss Kingsley with a shake of her head, though there was a distinctly warm tone to her voice.
“Absolutely not, Miss Kingsley. Is she not a breathtaking creature, Mr. Hatcher?” asked Colin, his eyes narrowing a fraction.
Hatch’s brows pulled together, and his eyes darted between Colin and Miss Kingsley. But more importantly, he remained mute as Miss Kingsley’s blush turned from pleased to uncomfortable.
“Yes,” he finally said, and Colin nearly laughed out loud. Truly, the fellow was doing as much to ruin the situation as Colin. Miss Kingsley deserved far better than such a tepid sentiment.
*
Jack was an intelligent fellow. Though he had a reputation for being gruff, brusque, and unwavering, there was not an investor in England who was not aware of his quick wits and ability to conquer problems and find the solution. Yet all those brains were for naught as he watched another man flirt and flatter his Lily.
Surely, there was some word he could speak to end this ridiculous display, but DeVere lavished compliments on Lily, making her beam like a midsummer’s day, which was a far cry from so many of the huffy frowns she’d bestowed on Jack during their acquaintance. Though he’d mended the rift between them, it was a far cry from the warmth she exuded with each of DeVere’s words.
Then there were the quick flashes of triumph that DeVere shot at Jack whenever Miss Kingsley’s gaze was turned away. Jack had seen such looks enough times to recognize it for the gloat it was. Of course, in those situations, it was generally followed by a tragic fall from grace as the fool who thought he had the upper hand was quickly put back in his place. But Jack didn’t know what DeVere was trying to accomplish nor how to keep him from turning Miss Kingsley’s head.
“And how are your preparations for the concert?” asked DeVere. “I am certain you will be the star of the night.”
Lily gave a huff and a hint of a frown, but there was too much of a pleased twinkle in her eye for those tokens of displeasure to be believed. “Things are well underway, Mr. DeVere. I only hope that all will go well.”
“You needn’t worry. I am certain it will be a raging success.”
“What concert?” asked Jack. It was the inanest question he could ask at the moment, but it was the only thing that came to mind.
“Our Miss Kingsley—”
Jack’s teeth creaked as he glowered at DeVere’s impertinence, but the lad was unfazed. He’d always thought DeVere was sensible, but his behavior was proving him a fool; Jack had never wished to knock the boy’s perfect teeth askew before, but he did in that moment, and if DeVere did not tread lightly, Jack was liable to do just that.
“—has organized a charity concert,” said Mr. DeVere.
“I am working with a group of ladies from the Gilliford Music Society. I am hardly doing it alone,” said Lily, with a faint blush coloring her cheeks. “We are organizing a charity concert for the Women’s Aid Fund, which assists widows and their children.”
“And she is performing in it,” said DeVere.
Jack glanced between the pair as he tried to understand why it hurt to receive that news from a secondhand source and not the lady beside him. She had an abundance of conversation yet had not mentioned a word about it.
“Along with several others,” said Lily.
Jack’s wretched mind moved as though soaked in molasses. Though he struggled for some semblance of intelligence, he stood there, mute, while DeVere finally gave his farewells. Lily chattered on as they made their way, seemingly unaware or unmoved by Jack’s stunned silence.
His cavalier words to Silas that morning returned to haunt him. Courting had not been a high priority at the time, but it was clear he had misjudged the situation. He had a prior claim, but Lily was free to break with him. They were bound together in the slightest way possible, and Jack was not foolish enough to believe that having their engagement formally in place would be enough if she chose to be rid of him. Lily was too headstrong to do anything less.
Jack had known plenty of gentlemen who’d lost vast amounts of money and property by thinking they held the winning hand before the game was played out, and he would not allow himself to fall prey to such pride. And if that afternoon had shown him anything else, it was that Lily was a prize, and if he did not venture forth with caution, he might lose her.
Lily did not scowl when DeVere was about. She laughed and smiled.
Her uncle’s home was quickly appearing, and Jack scoured his useless mind for a plan. Silas had said he needed to court Lily, but Jack couldn’t think of how to go about that. The front steps arrived, and Lily moved to the front door and grabbed the handle.
Jack grasped onto the first thought that emerged. “I can escort you about Town.”
Lily stiffened and stared at him, and Jack tried not to flinch.
“Your aunt did not come with you today.” The words he planned to say did not make it past his lips in the manner he’d intended.
“She is quite generous with her donations, but like many, prefers to guard her time and does not wish to accompany me.”
Jack knew full well how easy it was to think funding charities was enough, but he’d seen those children and the good Lily had done for them, and he did not intend on making that mistake again.
“I enjoyed escorting you. Should you require another, please send word, and I will come.”
A hint of a smile played on Lily’s lips, but her eyes said she did not believe him. “I am grateful for the offer, but I am certain that you are far too busy
to be squiring me about.”
Jack wished he had the words to tell her how wrong she was on that score. For once, could he not have DeVere’s silver tongue that was adept at conveying the convoluted mess of feelings plaguing him?
“For you, I am never too busy,” he said.
Lily gave a hesitant nod, and Jack longed to see more acceptance and less trepidation in that little movement. She turned back to the door, and Jack fumbled for anything he might say to keep her there a moment longer.
“We should go for a drive tomorrow,” he blurted. The muscles in his neck tensed at the clumsy manner in which he spoke, but Jack counted it as a victory that he had managed to say anything.
Lily paused and turned to face him. “A drive?”
Unable to formulate coherent words, he nodded.
She sighed, her lips pursing a moment before she spoke. Would she hesitate for DeVere? Jack fairly growled at his ridiculous self. What was the matter with him? He’d faced competition before and had handled it rationally, yet now he was little more than a bumbling fool.
“The city is too crowded for it to be worthwhile, and our last attempt was not terribly pleasant,” she replied.
Jack’s mouth opened, though he was uncertain if he meant to convince or beg. This was ridiculous! There was no need to become so flustered. He had faced many challenges before and managed it with calm and aplomb, but with Lily’s brown eyes staring at him and DeVere’s specter haunting him, Jack was undone.
Before he could say a word, she added, “A different sort of outing then? It is abominable that you have not seen much of Town.”
“I’ve been occupied with other things.”
Lily’s eyebrows rose in challenge. “That is a poor excuse.”
Jack nodded and thought back to their conversation about London. “Westminster tomorrow, then?”
She straightened, her brows coming together. “Westminster?”
“You said it was your favorite sight.”
A Stolen Kiss (Victorian Love Book 1) Page 13
