by Beth Wiseman
Mammi stood and took Jonathan’s hand in hers. “Let’s go talk in the other room.” She steered him into the kitchen.
“Sit,” she instructed, then brought a plate of oatmeal raisin cookies to the table. “I made your favorite this afternoon.”
“Danki.” He didn’t have the heart to tell her he was full. Instead, he swiped a cookie from the plate.
“Tell me all about your evening.” Mammi’s brown eyes sparkled with curiosity. “How was her family?”
“They were great. I had a gut time.” Jonathan bit into the cookie as his worries continued to nip at him.
“Was iss letz?” Mammi seemed to sense his hesitation.
“I really care about her,” Jonathan admitted. “I just don’t see how it can work.”
“Why not?” Mammi picked up a cookie. “You both seem to like each other and that’s probably the most important part of a relationship. If you don’t like each other, you won’t make it through the tough times.” She bit into the cookie while seeming to ponder something. “Is it the distance? You know you’re always welcome here. You don’t have to rush back home unless your dat is tired of taking care of your haus and animals.”
Jonathan couldn’t lie. The distance was part of his hesitation. “It’s not only that.” He took another cookie from the plate. “I just don’t see how it can work with our age difference.”
“Why not?” Mammi lifted her eyebrows. “Your daadi and I have made it work.” She grinned. “In fact, we still like each other after all these years.”
Jonathan chuckled. “That is fantastic, Mammi, but I’m not sure her dat will give me his permission to date her. He seemed to be grilling me from the moment I stepped out of the van.”
Mammi waved off his comment. “Mei dat did the same thing to Omar, but he came around. They got along wonderfully. It’s a dat’s job to make sure his boppli marries a gut man. If you ever have a dochder, you’ll do the same thing to her boyfriends.”
Jonathan nodded and took another bite of the cookie. He wanted to believe his grandmother’s encouraging words, but he knew in the back of his mind—in his heart—he was afraid to trust another woman after the way Grace had hurt him. Janie was too sweet to mean to hurt him, but maybe she wouldn’t care about him enough to look past their age difference, even if he could.
“Are you worried she’ll break your heart the way Grace did?” Mammi asked gently. Had she been reading his mind? “Janie is a different maedel.”
“I know.” Jonathan stared down at the table. “But I’m just not sure.”
“It’s late,” Mammi said after a few moments of silence between them. “I need to get your daadi out of his chair and into his bed. I go through this every night.”
“I’ll help you.” Jonathan popped the last of his cookie into his mouth and headed into the family room. As he tried to coax his snoring grandfather awake, he wondered if his grandmother was right. Maybe he and Janie could somehow make their relationship work.
Janie’s smile was wide as she climbed the porch steps after saying good-bye to Jonathan. The dinner had gone better than she’d ever imagined it would. Her parents were welcoming, and Jonathan seemed comfortable getting to know them and Marie.
She stopped walking when she reached the porch swing. Their visit on the porch had been even more romantic than the buggy ride. She was still stunned by the way he’d described her hair. No one had ever said her hair was as beautiful as the sunset. When she was in school, the boys used to make fun of her, saying her hair was the color of orange crayons. She always felt different and strange because she was the only redhead in the school.
When she was with Jonathan, however, she felt beautiful and special. He wasn’t like any other man she’d met. None of the boys in her youth group were interested in her, but Marie never had any trouble getting the boys’ attention. Janie always assumed it was due to her strange hair, but Jonathan told her he noticed her hair when they first met. He felt like a gift sent to her by God, and she was so very thankful!
Her feelings for him were growing deeper and deeper with each passing day. She wondered if this was how true love felt. If Jonathan felt the same way about her, he could possibly be the man who would love her for the rest of her life. Her spirit soared at the thought of settling down and raising a family together.
Janie stepped into the house and hung up her wrap. Then she found her parents sitting at the kitchen table. She smiled as she greeted them. Her cheeks ached from smiling so much.
“Danki for allowing me to invite Jonathan over tonight. He said he had a very nice time.” She started toward the stairs. “I’m going to go get ready for bed.”
“Janie, wait,” her mother said. “Please sit down for a moment. We’d like to talk to you.”
Janie spun, and their dismal expressions sent dread pooling in her belly. “Is something wrong?”
“No, but we’d like to speak with you.” Dat cleared his throat and rested his elbows on the table.
“Did I do something wrong?” Janie asked, her voice squeaking like a young child’s. She sat down across from her parents and felt as if she were facing the congregation after she’d been caught committing a sin. But she hadn’t deliberately done anything sinful.
“No, of course not. We’d just like to discuss Jonathan with you.” Her mother glanced at her father, and he nodded. “He’s a very nice young man, but we have some concerns.”
“Concerns? I don’t understand.” Janie’s throat suddenly became dry, and she tried in vain to swallow.
“I spoke to him outside when he arrived,” Dat began, his eyes somber. “I asked him what his intentions are with you, and he said he would like to get to know you better. He said he cares about you.”
A glimmer of hope ignited inside of Janie, but her father’s serious face quickly extinguished it.
“He’s planning to go back to Maryland in early December,” Dat said. “Your mamm and I don’t want you to get involved with him and then decide to move away. We’d like all three of our kinner to stay in our community.”
“He could decide to stay here,” Janie offered. “He hasn’t left yet.” Janie looked at her mother, hoping for her support, but instead, her mother continued to frown.
“Your dat is right,” Mamm said. “We don’t want you to move away, but we also don’t want to see you hurt when he leaves. You need to keep going to youth group, and you’ll find the right bu for you in our community.”
“No,” Janie said, her voice now trembling with emotion. “I’m not interested in the buwe in my youth group. I want to get to know Jonathan better. Why can’t you give him a chance? You’ll see why I like him.”
Her parents exchanged bleak looks.
“Do you realize he’ll be thirty in a few months?” Dat asked her.
Janie nodded. “Ya, he told me, and I’ll be twenty-one in June.”
Dat shook his head. “I’m not comfortable with you dating a man who is nearly a decade older than you. It’s not right.”
Mamm nodded. “I agree.”
Janie gasped and tears stung her eyes as she looked back and forth between her parents. “But, Mamm, you said he’s a nice man. Why does his age matter if he’s a gut Christian man?”
“I would like you to find someone your age or at least closer to your age,” Mamm said. “You have shared life experiences with your freinden from your youth group.”
“Shared life experiences?” Janie wiped away an errant tear with the back of her hand. “What does that even mean? We’re both Amish and we have a special connection I’ve never felt with any other bu. We enjoy each other’s company. What more do we need?”
“I don’t want to see you get hurt, Janie.” Mamm’s eyes were sympathetic as she leaned forward to hold Janie’s hand, but Janie moved her hands out of her mother’s reach. “As your dat said, Jonathan is going to go back to Maryland and leave you here with a broken heart.”
“You don’t know that,” Janie retorted with more resentme
nt than she’d meant to share. She turned her focus to her father. “You said he told you he cared about me. Please give him a chance.”
Dat shook his head, looking unconvinced. “I don’t think he’s right for you. If he asks for permission to date you, I’m going to tell him no.”
Speechless, Janie turned to her mother again, but her mother only shook her head.
“I don’t understand you,” Janie said, her voice radiating with anguish. “You want Marie and me to get married and have a family like Sam, but you won’t approve of the man I want to see. It doesn’t make sense.”
“There will be other buwe,” Mamm said, her eyes warming. “I promise you, Janie.” She glanced at Dat. “I had my heart broken before I met your dat. Jonathan won’t be the last man you care about.”
“Your mamm is right,” Dat said. “We’re only doing this for your own gut. We know what’s best for our kinner.”
“You can be his freind, but we can’t allow you to date him,” Mamm clarified. “I know you enjoy talking to him at work, and there’s nothing wrong with that, right, Timothy?”
Dat gave a quick nod. “There’s nothing wrong with being his freind, but that’s all.”
Janie bit back angry words as she wiped away more tears. She would never speak belligerently to her parents, but she was crushed by their decision. She’d never known her parents to be so unreasonable. Why couldn’t they see how special Jonathan was? Why couldn’t they support Janie’s choice in a suitor?
“I’m going to bed,” Janie finally said, softly. “Gut nacht.” She stood and rushed up the stairs, throwing herself onto her bed and letting her tears flow into her pillow.
Janie heard her door click shut, followed by light footsteps crossing her room. She squeezed her eyes shut and hoped it wasn’t her mother who had come to see her. She couldn’t stand the idea of hearing more negative words about Jonathan.
The bed shifted and a gentle hand touched her shoulder.
“Janie?” Marie’s sweet voice asked. “Are you all right?”
Janie shook her head, still facing the wall. “No, I’m not.”
“I heard everything,” Marie admitted as she rubbed Janie’s back. “I’m sorry for eavesdropping, but I couldn’t help it. I’m so sorry Mamm and Dat don’t approve of Jonathan. I think he’s perfect for you.” She sighed. “I was hoping Dat and Mamm would see past his age.”
Janie rolled over and sniffed as she looked up at her sister. “I was hoping too.” She hugged her arms around her middle as if to stop her heart from breaking. “They said I can be his freind, but Dat will never permit him to date me. I just don’t understand. I thought they would see how wonderful Jonathan is and be froh that I found him. You’ve never had a problem finding buwe who like you, but they never like me. What if I never find anyone else who likes me?”
Marie clicked her tongue. “You can’t possibly believe that, Janie. You’ll find someone. For now, you can enjoy being Jonathan’s freind. At least Dat will allow you to do that.”
Janie nodded. “You’re right.” The tiny flicker of hope took root inside of Janie. She would cherish Jonathan’s friendship for as long as she could.
Janie lifted a tray of peanut butter spread and stepped out from the Riehls’ kitchen the following Sunday. This week’s church service was hosted by the Riehl family on their farm only a mile away from where her family lived, and now the noon meal was being served in their barn.
She shivered as the October breeze caused her black sweater and purple dress to flutter in the wind. Her thoughts had been stuck on her conversation with her parents Wednesday night. She hadn’t told Jonathan what her parents had said about him, and she tried to hide her disappointment from him. She was grateful she could still enjoy lunch with him every weekday, but she longed for their relationship to progress.
“Janie!” Marie called behind her. “Janie, wait!”
Janie turned as her sister hurried toward her, carrying a coffeepot. “Was iss letz?”
“Nothing is wrong.” Marie grinned. “You’ll never guess who is here.”
Janie shrugged. “I have no idea.”
“Jonathan!” Marie pointed toward the barn. “I saw him sitting near Samuel and Mike.”
“He is?” Janie asked with surprise. “I didn’t see him during the service.”
“I didn’t either, but we were sitting all the way in the back.” Marie held out the coffeepot. “You take this and go fill his mug. I’ll handle the peanut butter spread.”
“Danki.” Janie took the pot and headed into the barn. She found the table where Jonathan sat next to a man, who must be his grandfather, and was surprised to see her brother sitting across from them. Excitement overtook her at the prospect of introducing Jonathan to Samuel. Perhaps Samuel could help her convince her parents that Jonathan was an acceptable choice for a boyfriend.
She began filling coffee mugs and worked her way down the table toward Jonathan. When she reached him, her smile broadened and happiness surged through her.
“Kaffi?” she asked.
Jonathan looked up and his eyes widened in surprise. “Janie. I saw your dat earlier, but I didn’t see you.” He touched the arm of the elderly man beside him. “Daadi, this is mei freind Janie. Janie, this is Omar.”
“It’s nice to meet you.” Janie shook Omar’s hand and then looked at her brother and cousin, who were sitting across from Jonathan. “Have you met mei bruder, Samuel, and my cousin Mike? Sam and Mike, this is Jonathan and his grandfather, Omar.”
Samuel leaned over the table and shook Jonathan’s hand. “We were talking earlier, but I didn’t realize you were freinden with mei schweschder.”
“Hi, Jonathan,” Mike said.
“It’s great to meet you,” Jonathan said, shaking Mike’s hand. Then he looked up at Janie. “I didn’t realize we were visiting your district, but I should have known since we’re not far from your haus.”
“I’m glad you could come today.” She pointed toward the end of the table. “I need to go now.”
“Maybe we can talk later?” he asked, his brown eyes hopeful.
“Ya,” she said with a nod. “I’d like that.”
After lunch, Jonathan smiled and nodded as his grandparents introduced him to a few of their friends. While he tried his best to be friendly to their acquaintances, he couldn’t stop scanning the knot of people for Janie. His grandparents had suggested they visit another church district since it was an off Sunday in their home district, but Jonathan hadn’t realized he was going to Janie’s district.
He was surprised when she appeared at his table with the coffeepot. He was thankful to see her beautiful smile this morning. She’d been on his mind nonstop since he’d had supper at her parents’ house. The hour they spent together at lunch every day at work was never enough to satisfy his growing desire to be with her.
As he glanced around, he saw Janie’s parents standing on the other side of the barn, talking to another couple. Her mother met his gaze and raised her hand in greeting, and he returned the gesture. He’d seen Janie’s father earlier, and Timothy had been pleasant as well. He hoped that meant they approved of him. Janie hadn’t indicated they didn’t like him, but he still worried.
Jonathan looked through the barn door and spotted Janie standing near the pasture fence, talking with a petite and pretty woman with light brown hair. The young woman was holding a baby, and he assumed she was Janie’s sister-in-law. He excused himself from his grandparents’ conversation and made his way toward the two women.
When Janie saw him, her pretty face lit up with a warm smile. “Jonathan, this is my sister-in-law, Mandy, and my niece, Becky.”
“Hi, Jonathan,” Mandy said with a nod. “I’ve heard a lot about you.”
Janie’s cheeks turned pink, and she was even more adorable.
Samuel and Mike sidled up to them, along with a little blond boy, who resembled Mike, and a pretty brunette, who was holding Mike’s hand.
“Are you ready to go?�
� Samuel asked Mandy, and she nodded.
“Jonathan,” Janie said, “you met Mike earlier. This is Mike’s girlfriend, Rachel, and his younger bruder, John. This is mei freind Jonathan. We work together.”
Jonathan greeted them and then they said good-bye before heading to the buggies, leaving Jonathan and Janie standing by the fence alone.
“I’m so glad I got to meet more members of your family today,” he said, silently admiring how the sunlight made her hair resemble fire. She was so beautiful he couldn’t take his eyes off her.
“I am too.” She watched her family walk toward a buggy. “Marie and I used to take care of Mike and John’s dat. He was our onkel Raymond.”
“He was the one on dialysis?”
“That’s right. We miss him.” As she turned toward him, he saw her face brighten. “I talked to your mammi in the kitchen earlier. She’s very nice.” She peered up at him, and her eyes somehow seemed a deeper shade of blue. “Did you have a gut day yesterday?”
“Ya, I did.” He leaned against the split rail fence. “I helped mei daadi and onkel with a few projects around the farm. I always have a gut time when I’m with them. How about you?”
“I had a gut day too. I did some baking and cleaning.” She rested her hand on the rail beside him. “The weekends go by too fast.”
“They do, but I look forward to our time together at work during the week.”
“I do too.” Janie looked pensive, as if she was mentally debating. She opened her mouth to speak but was interrupted by someone calling her name.
“Janie!” Marie called from across the driveway. “It’s time to go.”
Janie stepped away from the fence. “I’m so sorry. My family is ready to go. It was gut seeing you.”
“Ya, it was.” Jonathan smiled. “I’ll see you tomorrow.”
“Good-bye,” she said, then rushed off to meet her family.
Jonathan’s smile faded. He wondered what she was going to say before her sister interrupted their conversation.
