by Skylar Dawn
"Today we’re free! Tonight we drink!"
I giggled, because from my point of view Lou seemed to be drinking for hours. I didn't know how drunk he was, but he was happier than me upon the sight of raspberry buttercream after my morning workout. I decided to mimic him and take a few more sips from my bottle.
"What's the occasion?" I shouted, fighting with Britney Spears.
"A day without insensitive, selfish, ignorant guys!" He shook the bottle and invited me to a toast.
Why not? I thought.
"No jerks!"
This time I drank a little more, but if I managed to drink lots of water and food, it wouldn't be a problem. And I had no intention of chugging that whole bottle. The limousine moved, and Lou shrieked, excited. "Party!"
As predicted, about fifteen minutes later the driver was cruising the Strip, while Lou and I were singing outside the car, tucked into the opening on the roof. With intent or not, that champagne got me much faster than I had calculated. When the car stopped at our final destination, I was seeing things with one eye. I grabbed Lou's arm and he led me to a green sign next to an elevator.
"Clover?" I chuckled at the name of the place.
"For luck!" Lou laughed.
We got into the elevator that had only three buttons: ground floor, bar, terrace. The decision was very simple. Lou and I pushed the bar button at the same time. The elevator went up for a long time, until the doors opened to a crowded hall. Lou pulled me through the crowd, hunting down a small table near the glazed windows. The view was amazing. Of course we had no place to sit. I don’t get the whole craze about elbow tables in bars. But at least I could lean over it.
I glanced around, enjoying the number of handsome guys per square foot. My friends from the pool and the watermelon talk crossed my mind, because this bar had only this type of fruit available. There wasn't even a modest kiwi left for me to enjoy.
"For someone who would celebrate a day without jerks, here is full of them," I narrowed my eyes at Lou.
"Look outside, it's dark, darling! It's night!" Lou left me at the table and vanished into the crowd, reappearing a few minutes later with a tray of tequila shots.
"I'm not going to drink this. Tequila is from hell." I shook my head in denial, but Lou pushed a shot towards me.
"Hug the devil!" He giggled, drinking his shot.
I was having second thoughts, but I ended up drinking a shot with him. Only one. The music was great, and Lou showed me some interesting figures in the midst of that tangle of people.
"What about that ponytail over there?"
I twisted my face in disgust. Definitely not my type. Anyone who puts their pants lower than mine doesn't deserve a second look, let alone a friendly interaction.
"No way Lou."
He motioned to another four or five, but my radar was whistling in desperation. This time I was the one who suggested another shot. Since everything was under control, I had no problem getting out of my comfort zone a little bit. Lou quickly found something that stirred his penetrating gaze, and he was right, the guy looked like a movie star, and apparently, he liked Lou too. It didn't take long for him to come to our table.
"Are you taking shots? I thought I'd bring some more." The guy leaned on the table, close to Lou, and smiled.
I looked at Lou trying to decipher his expression. He winked at me and gestured to the guy's butt. That was my cue.
"He is,” I smirked. “I was on my way to the terrace."
I got out of there real quick and crossed the bar searching for the elevator door. I took advantage of that amount of mirrored glass windows to tidy up my dress and try to fix my hair. I wasn't in position to look like an easy prey after that amount of alcohol. I pressed the elevator button and it opened at once. I wasn't counting on the presence of that magnificent being right in front of me. The guy had that very square, super-sexy jaw, and a grin so wide that he didn't even need to say anything to let me know what he was thinking. He scratched his chin and leaned on the side of the elevator, crossing his arms.
Before the elevator door opened on the terrace, I had my body glued to his and our lips were on a rampant search of who knows what. That was a first class jerk, but damn, they are good at what they do. We got out of the elevator onto the first couch available in that lounge, and I confess I didn't even pay attention to the view. I was busy trying to coordinate hands and breathless kissing from that hot mouth.
"Don't you want to finish this conversation somewhere else?" He whispered in my ear.
That's when my survival instinct decided to wake up and kick this crazy nut in the ass. I was having more fun than I should in Sin City.
"I need to tell my friend, I'll be right back."
I crossed the terrace so fast that I don't know how I didn't stumble to get into the elevator. Instead of going down to the bar, I went downstairs and threw myself into the first taxi that passed by. I was going home, that was it. I was so not going back to the terrace and to that delicious mouth even if I wanted to, and trust me, I did. New city, new Emma.
#
When I got to my apartment, I searched my whole bag and couldn't find my keys. Searching in my dress would be ridiculous, since the guy on the terrace had left nothing unattained. I leaned against the door and slid to the floor. It was no use stressing in the middle of the night. I would have wait for the sun to rise and see what I could do. That phase in which reason is coming back and bringing with it an uncontrollable sleep urge had overwhelmed me completely. I had no doubt, I leaned my head against the door and blacked out.
I woke up with a headache, but the couch was so soft I didn't want to move. You know when we wake up from a hangover and the world seems to spin ten times faster? Yeah, getting up was the last thing I wanted to do. I was going to hibernate right there, make a cocoon in that navy-blue, musky-scented blanket and only get up when my stomach blew the apocalypse trumpets. There was one little problem. I didn't have a navy-blue blanket, let alone with a musky scent. That's when I realized the couch wasn't mine, it wasn't in my apartment and I didn't even know where it was. Alert, I scanned the environment for something that would serve as a weapon, since with my luck, I'd be with a kidnapper, or worse, Brett. I mean, another one of the same kind.
Dress, check. Micro-purse, check. My little piggy, check. Shoes, check. Dignity... we'll talk about that later. What kind of sadistic killer has daisies on the coffee table, keeps tea in ornamental wooden boxes and has an extremely familiar living room? A psychopath stalker, of course! I ran my hands through the couch, got my cell phone, and after missing the number several times, I called Lou.
“Lou help me,” I whispered.
“Girl! What a party last night?! Tell me everything, what happened upstairs?”
"Listen," I approached the microphone area to my mouth, "I don't know where I am."
"Wow, so exciting," he laughed. "Working out your family jewels is definitely a success for you, huh?"
"I'm serious," I cried. "I went home last night and I woke up in a stalker's apartment, help me!"
"Emma, this is not funny."
"Am I laughing by any chance?! What do I do?"
"Oh my Saint Cabernet," he breathed frightened. "Think, think, think. I knew I couldn't leave you alone, I knew it! But no, I had to follow Chris Hemsworth's butt double. That's karma!"
"Focus Lou," I shook my head. I had to stop him before he started to pray to all the alcoholic saints he knew.
"Are you tied up? You have to find a knife," he said exasperated on the other side of the line.
"I'm not tied up."
"Then you'll have to break down the door. Is it made of wood? I hope so."
I looked at the door, "The key is in the lock."
Lou let out a scream.
"Then run, girl! Run!"
Of course, how did I not think of this before? I know my brain doesn't work when I wake up, but with a hangover it was pretty dead, so having synapse was an impossible task.
"I'm l
eaving, Lou, wish me luck!" I turned off the phone and measured the distance of the race, ready to beat Usain Bolt's record on the hundred meters.
"Ah you woke up," said the individual in jeans, white t-shirt, broad shoulders and frying pan in his hand coming towards me. "Eggs?"
"Don't come any closer," I landed a perfect triple jump off the couch. "I have 27 dans in Muay Thai," I threatened him with my stiletto.
"I don't think Muay Thai has dans," he smiled, "And I’m not going to hurt you," he put the eggs on the plate right in front of the tea boxes. "I'm Noah Cook, your next door neighbor."
With my heel in my hand and displaying my best Karate Kid pose, I analyzed the stranger walking to the fridge and pointing to a box of orange juice.
"Juice or coffee?"
"Juice?"
Noah brought two glasses and sat down on the edge of the couch.
"Your purse didn't have the keys, so the locksmith will open your door this morning. I'm leaving, but you can stay here if you want."
"Thank you," I sat at the opposite end.
"So that means you're not a psychopath killer?"
"If I were a murderer, I wouldn't tell you would I?" He laughed. "But chill out, murder must be a lot of work. And it has all that blood. "
"You could poison me," I said. Noah then snapped a huge bite out of my plate.
"Happy?" He smiled.
"I guess so," but I still had a bit of distrust, "How did I even get here?"
"I heard a loud bang outside and thought it was a raccoon tossing the trash, but it was you snoring on your doorstep. I thought it would be ecologically incorrect to leave the animals frightened," he joked, "crazy night?"
"Typical," I replied, "a succession of wrong choices with double-shots of tequila."
"Vegas," he shrugged his shoulders.
"But wait a minute," I raised an eyebrow and looked at him. "How do you know I'm your neighbor? I've never seen you."
I didn't even know the apartment next door had people living in it. Everything was always so quiet in this building that if it wasn't for Mrs. Dunn and the girls, I'd be certain I was the only one living here. I've never met anyone in the hallway or common areas.
Noah stood up, opened the door of the balcony and motioned to the pool.
"You do water aerobics with Mrs. Dunn and a couple smiling ladies in the morning every Tuesday and Thursday."
"It's true," I pondered. I wasn't exactly hiding. "Sorry, the lights of the Strip make us kind of dazed," I relaxed.
"That's what they say. And you should call your friend," he gestured to my phone buzzing non-stop, "he must be worried."
Noah walked across the room, through the door.
"I have to go. I'll get my key on the way back, I know your address," his face disappeared for a moment and reappeared through the crack of the door, "I just don't know your name."
"Emma. Emma Woods."
My cell phone still buzzed incessantly. If I knew Lou, he'd already called the FBI, CIA, my mother, or even Mia, which would be awful, because it's so much easier to face the police than either one of them.
"I'm fine Lou, he wasn't a killer," I answered.
"Thank you, my Saint Merlot! I prayed so hard! A week without cupcake."
"You mean I'm only worth a week without sweets?" I whined.
"Sweets? Hell no, only cupcakes," he corrected me. "Where are you?"
"At my neighbor's house, long story, I'll tell you later," I sighed.
"And is this neighbor at least handsome?"
"Bye Lou," I hung up the phone.
I didn't have time to notice my neighbor's attributes with that kind of look, and if he was going to kill me, I would prefer not to memorize his face, I would go to the light, that's it. Becoming a poltergeist was not part of my plans, after all, have you ever seen a gorgeous poltergeist?! No no, there's always a torn outfit involved, a hair that needs urgent care and a dirty fingernail. I'm not even going to talk about the absence of shoes and the obsession with appearing in mirrored bathrooms. Who in their right mind would want to become such a dreadful thing?! All I know is that for a supposedly psycho stalker, Noah's apartment was tidy and breakfast was good. Okay, it's pretty hard to screw up eggs, I know, but they were good.
CHAPTER four
The Spider Exterminator
When Noah showed up to get the key, Saturday was almost over. I hadn't done much other than record my vlog and spend the day lying on the couch regretting how much I drank the night before. Of course I was proud to have fled the terrace, but I confess that some details of my behavior still needed to change if I wanted to execute my plan correctly. I was looking at the ceiling, but the noise that came from Noah's apartment was deconcentrating. It seemed like there was a relentless chase going on in there, so I thought I should see if everything was okay. I knocked on his door twice, and I heard his voice screaming from the inside.
"It's open, come inside!"
Noah was crouching on the side of the couch with a huge broom, looking under the furniture. Suddenly he jumped back, falling on his butt.
"Is everything okay here?"
"Almost," he brandished the broom handle under the couch and the tip came out the other side. "There's a damn spider here."
I giggled, a man that size afraid of a tiny spider.
"I thought you were killing someone."
"That's because you haven't seen the size of that thing, I'll need to set up a funeral and everything."
"Let me see," I took the broom from his hand and pushed the couch forward. "I can't believe you're afraid of a helpless animal."
Noah stood up and wiped his hands on his jeans.
"Alright then," he shrugged his shoulders. "You go ahead and kill that thing. I need to take the cookies out of the oven."
He went back into the kitchen and I stood by the couch motionless, waiting for the darn spider. I didn't noticed how good the smell was, but now that he mentioned cookies, my stomach woke up to identify all the scents in the air: hazelnut cream, cinnamon and chocolate. Apparently the spider was also a fan of the scent, because the monster jumped from under the couch, falling less than one step away from my left foot. It was huge and had all those creepy, creepy brown hair strands to scare me.
"That's not a spider! It's a hound from hell!"
I heard Noah laughing.
"Told you. "
I hit the broom with on the floor with all my strength but the creature escaped to the right, seeking refuge under the end table. I shoved the broom handle in an attempt to scare it away, but the darn thing rushed towards me.
"Help!" I hopped three times next to the kitchen counter.
"There's nothing I can do for you." Noah laughed. "Look who's scared of a defenseless critter now."
"This creature is not a helpless animal. Can't you see the ominous look? This spider wants to grab this broom and hit me, I'm sure."
Noah leaned on the counter and watched, giggling. Since he wasn't going to do anything, I'd better attack at once. I had to invoke my ninja camp techniques I've learned during my old days. "Give me your shirt!"
"What?"
"Your t-shirt, give it to me!" I shouted.
Noah took off his shirt very fast and I grabbed it from his hands before he even tried to hand it over. I threw it over the spider and the beast ran all over the place, but this time I had the advantage of a surprise blow. I hit the broom on the shirt so hard the poor thing was already the color of the bristles, walking in circles. The mound ran a couple more times and stopped for good, withering.
"What now?" Noah asked.
"I'm not going to clean this up, I've had the difficult task to kill it!" I retorted and returned the broom to him.
"You killed my T-shirt in the process."
"We had losses," I laughed, "But the job was done."
Noah shook his head and smiled.
"I'm not going to touch that thing, it might move."
"No way in hell," I teased. "Even if this thing is resurr
ected by God it won't be able to get out of there."
Noah took a tray of warm cookies from the oven and placed it on top of the counter, each one more appealing and appetizing than the other.
"Leave it. I'll get used to the new decor. Do you want some?" He pointed to the warm cookies, some with chocolate chips about to melt.
I nodded. Of course I wanted cookies. Since when I said no to such treats?! Especially out of the oven, very warm. He took two plates in the cupboard and held one in my direction.
"I don't know if it's good, I didn't try it."
I chose hazelnut cream and took a small bite to avoid burning my mouth. The cream flowed smoothly over the edge and the smell of hazelnut and chocolate was mesmerizing. It was delicious.
"This is very good!" I said holding my breath.
"Thank you." Noah smiled and added a couple more to his plate, then mimicked my bite. "It's burning hot."
"But I'm so not waiting to cool it down." I split a huge chunk and blew it trying to speed up the cooling. "So, you cook?!"
Noah smiled embarrassed, showing the dimples on his cheek.
"A little. I like to cook. But usually I'm the only one eating and I'm not too picky about flavors."
I covered my mouth, still chewing and giggled.
"Don't be shy, just call me. I eat. It's my favorite sport. Besides, if I cook something there is a huge possibility of blowing the kitchen into a million pieces."
"So in addition to loud snoring you also have a talent for pyrotechnics."
"I suppose so," I smiled. "And thank you for this morning. And the cookies."
Noah snatched up a good chunk of his cookie and answered with his mouth full.
"We're even. You saved me from the apocalypse demon."
"Maybe it's another talent."
I said goodbye to my neighbor and he insisted on giving me a bowl of warm cookies to eat watching TV. I accepted, because only a deal like that would be good enough to spoil my diet. And I was still hungry and had no desire to eat another frozen thing or order pizza. As my stomach was weird with yesterday's drinking, adding cheese to it would be a sentence of another rough night.
