I feel Kallen stiffen beside me and his face is blank again. I don’t think he wanted me to play that card. Too late now.
To my great consternation, Dagda chuckles. “Do you think I do not check your rings whenever I am in your presence? The magic of a left hand-fasting is powerful, Xandra. More powerful than even you.”
Kallen squeezes my shoulder again in an effort to get me to shut up. Yeah, like that’s going to work any better the second time. “I promised an Angel two favors in order to keep our rings from glowing so we could decide when to get married.”
Dagda shakes his head and laughs. “Xandra, even if that was true, it would only serve as more proof that you are not ready to get married. Now, if you do not mind, I am reviewing the charter with the Giants and making some necessary changes. I would like to be done with this by lunch so I can sit down with the Chieftans at supper. Then, we will be on our way home tomorrow. I believe this trip has been eventful enough without adding an ill-planned hand-fasting.”
You know, I’m supposed to help Dagda interview new housekeepers later today since his last one tried to start a war. He can forget that, now. I want to argue more about getting married but Kallen puts his arm around my shoulders and spins me around. I crane my neck to look back at Dagda but he’s already absorbed in the charter again.
When we are out of Dagda’s sight and hearing, I dig my heels in, forcing Kallen to stop propelling me forward. He drops his arm and scowls down at me. “He is not going to change his answer,” he grinds out.
My turn to scowl. “We can at least try.”
Running a hand through his hair, he waits a few heartbeats before saying, “Perhaps he is right. Maybe you are too young to make this decision.”
I’m so mad my green eyes have to be the color of lava. “And you’re some ancient sage with so many more years of experience than me?”
“No, but I didn’t make a deal with a shady Angel to get out of marrying you,” he growls.
I want to scream at him. I want to vent every last bit of frustration I have running through me. But, I don’t. Why? Because he’s right. So, instead of railing at him for something I did, I need to fix this. And, I’m going to need help.
There’s only one person I know who can offer it. Closing my eyes, I call for my wings. My big, fluffy white Angel wings. The pinches on my back tell me that they’re here.
“Are you planning to fly away?” Kallen asks in a snide tone that I don’t appreciate.
I sigh as I try to remember that I made him feel this way. “No, I’m not flying away. I’m going to fix this. I want to marry you, Kallen. I really do. I wish you would believe me.”
His arms are crossed tightly across his chest. If his muscles get any tauter, they’re going to turn into rocks. “I would have believed that yesterday. I am trying hard to believe it today.”’
“When you came in when I was taking a shower, I thought you believed that it was just a momentary panic attack that didn’t mean anything.”
He sighs and unclenches his arms. “I thought I did, as well. But Xandra, put yourself in my shoes. If I did the same thing you did, what would you think? How do we go forward from here?”
Usually, color races into my face. This time, it’s running out. “What are you saying?”
Whatever he was going to say, he doesn’t because Kegan and Alita walk into the room we are in. I didn’t really pay attention when we came in here. It’s some sort of sitting room with a mix of normal size and Giant size furniture. We’re standing behind one of the Giant chairs, so they don’t see us at first.
They’re both grinning from ear to ear while holding hands. That’s not normal behavior for them. They’re usually trying to act like they don’t want to be together. Maybe the same Apsaras magic that affected Kallen and me affected them as well. It takes them a moment to notice us because they are so focused on each other. When they do, their smiles slowly fade. “You two look glum this morning,” Kegan says. “What could have you down on such a beautiful morning?”
Kallen raises a brow in my direction. Right. Because I’m going to keep spreading the news of my stupidity. When he realizes that I’m not going to say anything, he turns his gaze to Kegan. “What has you so irritatingly cheerful?”
Kegan looks at Alita and it’s pretty clear what his answer’s going to be. Alita blushes but a grin spreads across her face. When they finally remember we’re here, Kegan says, “Alita and I are going to announce our engagement.”
Whoa. That’s big news since Kegan’s father is going to flip out. He wants Kegan to marry a full-blooded Fairy and Alita is nowhere close to that. I’m really happy for both of them, though. I really am. Even if there is a voice in the back of my mind that is pissed that they’re happier than me and Kallen at the moment. That self-centered, jealous voice is just going to have to shut up. Walking to Alita, I give her a big hug. “Congratulations,” I say.
“Why are you all winged out?” Kegan asks. “Have you brought about another round of catastrophes that we should know about? Someone new want to kill you today?”
He says that as if he’s talking about the weather. ‘Today will be cloudy with a ten percent chance of rain and a ninety percent chance that Xandra will be attacked by a random stranger.’ How sad is it that I have had so many people try to kill me, it’s not even something my friends get worked up over anymore? Instead, they tease me about it.
“No one except Kallen,” I mutter under my breath. Which of course everyone can hear because I can’t let a thought stream through my head without verbalizing it.
“Um, are we interrupting something?” Alita asks, looking a little closer and seeing how unhappy Kallen and I are.
“No, I was just going for some fresh air,” Kallen says. Apparently, his lungs didn’t get enough when he did that earlier.
“Okay, then. We will see you both later,” Kegan says and he steers Alita around us. They walk quickly out of the room.
Kallen looks down at me. “I will be back later. I need to cool down.”
I put my hand on his arm. I don’t care if he goes for a walk, but I need to know this first. “Are you breaking up with me?” Yes, call me insecure. I’m okay with that at the moment.
Again, he runs his hand through his hair and it takes way too many heartbeats for him to answer. Finally, he puts his hands on my cheeks and leans down to give me a light kiss. Leaning his forehead against mine, he says, “I have forgotten how to live without you.”
I’m going to go ahead and take that as a no. At least, I hope it’s a no. “You’re not planning to remember, are you?”
He laughs, but there’s not a lot of humor in it. He straightens up, but his hands are still on my cheeks, and he’s rubbing his thumbs gently over my skin. “I am going for a walk to blow off some steam. I am hurt, and I am angry, and I need to be alone right now. But, once you let a Witch Fairy get under your skin, apparently no matter what crazy things she does, it is impossible to get her out again.”
Okay, that’s a no, right? “I love you.”
“I love you, too. I will see you in a little while. In the meantime, please refrain from harassing the King.”
I give him my best innocent look. “What makes you think I would do that?”
His hands drop back to his sides and this time there is a little bit of humor in his laugh. “Because you are even more stubborn than he is and it is driving you insane that he said no to you.”
That is true. It is. Kallen narrows his eyes at me. I think he’s actually waiting for me to say I won’t harass Dagda. What, he wants me to lie to him? I’ll compromise. “I’ll try.”
He lifts one eyebrow. I guess he’s not buying it. With a shake of his head, he kisses me on the cheek and walks to the door on the far side of the room where Alita and Kegan had come in. At least this time he doesn’t slam the door when he goes through it.
Okay, I really need to fix this. There’s only one person I can think of who could help me. Well, Angel, actually. I�
��m going to try something that I haven’t done before. To put myself in Angel time. I concentrate really hard for a moment imagining myself gone from here. I open my eyes. And there’s Dagda staring at me like I’m insane, so obviously I’m not in Angel time.
“Whatever are you doing?” he asks.
Ignoring him, I close my eyes again. This time, I imagine being with Adriel. The one Angel I can call myself friends with. Sort of. She may actually think of me more as a pet project. I don’t have very many friends though, so I’m not too concerned with classifying them.
“Do you plan to stand there all day with your eyes closed?” a familiar voice says.
I open my eyes to find my favorite Angel of Death smiling at me. “Give me a break, this is my first trip here on my own.”
“Yes, and you caused such a racket, I am sure the whole of the Angel population heard you coming.”
I’m not sure if she’s teasing me or not. “I didn’t make any noise.”
She laughs. She has the pretty laugh of the Angels. Her long silvery blonde hair and beautiful face make it hard to believe she’s an Angel of Death. Her mouth doesn’t. “If you had been any louder, half of us would be deaf.”
I put my hands on my hips and try to give her a hard look. She doesn’t look affected. “I don’t know what you’re talking about. I was in the Fairy realm, now I’m here. I didn’t even move a muscle, so how could I have made noise? And don’t you say hello?”
She laughs. “Sorry, good manners are not exactly a job requirement for me.”
Good point. “I need your help.”
Adriel crosses her arms over her chest. “Apparently manners are not in your repertoire, either.”
I look at her sheepishly. “Sorry. Hi Adriel, how have you been?”
She’s somewhat appeased. “I took in a really nasty Shadow just before you got here. Most of the soul had to be removed. I believe I still have some of it under my fingernails.” She looks down at them to check. Eew.
“Can I ask you for help now?”
She gives me a ‘that’s a pathetic attempt at being polite’ look. “No,” she says. “First, I am going to explain to you what I meant about making too much noise when you arrived, so you will not do it again.”
Great, Angel lessons. I’m a little more concerned about my relationship with Kallen right now than proper Angel etiquette. But, I know Adriel and she won’t help me until she speaks her mind. “Okay.”
She starts pacing in front of me. “I’m trying to think of a way to explain it that you would understand.” She snaps her fingers and stops pacing. “It is like hearing traffic in your realm. If you are inside with your window closed, you can still hear it a little bit, but you hardly notice it. Until someone drives by honking their horn. Then, you hear it better and it’s more annoying than the quiet white noise you were hearing before.” Okay, I get it. I was the one blowing my horn. “But, what you just did was drive into the house and shattered the window.”
I scowl. “I don’t believe I was that loud.”
She laughs. “Trust me, the house is crumbling around you.”
I sigh. I don’t think she’s teasing; I think I was that loud. “Then how do I not make noise when I come here?”
She starts pacing again. “Travelling with your wings takes finesse. You need to gently coax them where you want to go.” She stops in front of me again. “You were not gently coaxing them. You were shouting to them at the top of your lungs, telling them to find me.”
Is she saying what I think she’s saying? “You could hear my thoughts?”
She shakes her head. “No. It is not like that.” She stops to think for a minute. “It is like your wings are a radio. They broadcast your location all the time. If you tell them quietly where you want to go, they will bring you there with whisper. If you are screaming at them in your mind, it is like turning the radio volume up all the way, and the sound waves can easily be heard by other wings. They interpret the signal and let the Angel they belong to know what is going on. As soon as you started shouting in your head, the signal was sent. Does this make sense?”
I nod. “I think so.”
“Good. So next time, coax your wings calmly and they will bring you wherever you want to go.”
A thought strikes me. “Does that mean if I teleport without my wings, you can’t hear me at all?”
The smile is instantly wiped off her face. “What did you say?”
Uh oh. I bite my bottom lip a second debating if I really want to repeat what I said. Adriel puts her hands on her hips. “Xandra, say that again. I want to make sure I heard you correctly.
I sigh. “Fine. I said, does that mean if I teleport without my wings you can’t hear me at all?”
I believe she’s in shock because she doesn’t say anything for a minute. Finally, she says, “You can move from place to place without the use of your wings?”
“Um, yeah.”
“That is impossible.”
I roll my eyes. “I get that response a lot when I do things.”
She’s pacing again. “Xandra, that simply is not possible.” She shakes her head as if that will negate my ability. I’m just going to stand here quietly while she works this through in her head. “One of the things that make losing our wings so horrible is not being able to get anywhere. And being able to teleport in mortal realms…” She’s shaking her head again. “That is unbelievable.”
“Adriel?” She stops pacing and looks at me. “Can we move this along? I really want to ask you something.”
She gives me a sour look that conveys how she feels about that, but she still manages to look, well, Angelic. “Please forgive me for pondering the ramifications of your latest impossible ability.”
Ramifications? That doesn’t sound good. I’m about to ask her what she means, but that will just put us back in the ‘it’s impossible/I can still do it’ loop. “How can I get out of a deal I made with an Angel?”
Her brows slam together. “What kind of deal? And with whom?”
I cannot believe the number of people I have to talk about my sex life to. You know, if everyone else my age had to talk about their sex lives with their parents, their grandparents, the King of their realm, the Angels, all the neighbors, all their friends, and wear a ring that glows if you have sex – I bet abstinence would be a little more widespread amongst teenagers. Adults, too. Then again, that didn’t stop me and Kallen. But, we did have the added push of the Apsaras magic.
“Xandra, I am waiting.” Adriel has her arms folded across her chest and is tapping her foot.
Fine. If she’s going to be that way about it. “I had sex with Kallen and Ambriel said he wouldn’t record it if I did a couple of favors for him. But now, I want everyone to know so they believe that Kallen and I should get married.”
It’s amazing how pretty she is with her shimmering silver blonde hair and perfect skin. Even when she’s wearing an ‘are you freakin stupid’ look on her face. “You made a deal. With an Angel of the Powers. To erase something from history. And you owe him favors.”
I take a deep breath, then say, “Yes, I had a momentary panic attack and he took advantage of it. He appeared after Kallen and I had sex and he offered to not write it down if I would do two favors for him.”
Her face is getting red and her eyes are narrowed down into tiny little slits. She sort of looks like she needs glasses. I wonder if Angels ever do need glasses? “So, you broke an oath you took, wanted to lie to the universe about it, and made a deal that you now want to back out of. Did I miss anything?”
Yes, my boyfriend doesn’t trust my feelings for him, now. I put my face in my hands and moan. “I know, it all sounds so bad.” I peek at her through my fingers. “But, I want to go back and fix it and do everything the right way.”
She rolls her eyes and shakes her head. “I will add ‘wants to change everyone else’s history to suit her own needs’ to the list.’” She starts pacing again. “What could he possibly want from you?” I
think she’s talking more to herself than she is to me, so I don’t respond. After a moment, she stops in front of me. “I am assuming that you did not know that seeking to erase something from history is a crime?”
My voice squeaks when I say, “A crime?”
Adriel shakes her head again. “You are so naïve; and equally as rash. Until your knowledge increases, I would seriously suggest a muzzle, for your mouth continuously gets you in trouble.”
I give her a sour look. “When you’re done insulting me, can you please tell me how I get out of this deal?”
She looks shocked. “Get out of it? Xandra, you cannot get out of a deal you have made with another Angel. It is forbidden.”
Blood of Destiny (Witch Fairy #6) Page 2
