The euphoria of her evening had been shot to pieces with this revelation. She couldn't take it in and yet his eyes were the same as hers, that's why she thought she'd seen him before. And Mr Brown knew. He knew! She turned to him.
'How did you know? How long have you known?'
Mr Brown cleared his throat. Part of him had hoped this moment would never arrive. But how could he deny his dear friend the opportunity to know this beautiful woman who was his flesh and blood. 'I've always known Ella, Daniel and I have been friends a long time,' he said quietly.
Ella's eyes opened in wide surprise. 'What? All these years? I trusted you. You knew things about me. Did you…. Does he know about my family, about the r…?' She couldn't say it.
A look passed between Mr Brown and Daniel. 'Yes Ella, he knows too.'
'Oh god, I trusted you! And the music? Was that his money too?'
Mr Brown nodded his head. 'Ella, Daniel and I have had so many conversations over the years about your right to know him. If Daniel won't speak against your mother, I will. She forbade him from ever getting in touch. Threatened him with publicity if he ever did. Rightly or wrongly he agreed, in exchange for her agreement that you would get the best education money could buy.'
'Ella.' She looked across to the man claiming to be her father. He could have saved her from the upbringing she'd endured and escaped from, but he'd never come for her. He couldn't just turn up here now and expect her to fall into his arms.
She shook her head at him. 'I can't do this. I want to go home just now.'
Daniel persisted. 'Ella, the newspapers have got hold of this. I don't know how. That's why I've come now. I wanted you to hear it from me. I wanted to be a part of your life but I maintained my agreement with your mother. I know in the early days it was for selfish business reasons, and later I didn't have anything to offer you other than money. And after so many years I'd convinced myself I no longer had the right to get to know you, but I couldn't let you read about this in the papers tomorrow without being forewarned. I've tried to stop it, but the paper's running it.'
'That was so good of you. To put me first for once. Well, now I know. I'm still going home.' Ella cringed at her tone. It so wasn't her.
While she was gathering her things Daniel tried to explain, not sure if she was listening. Mr Brown added his bit too. Eventually she left them behind in her dressing room. All three of them looked shell shocked and upset. No relationship between Ella and Daniel and the relationship between her and Mr Brown damaged, maybe for good.
Chapter 6
Ella got out of the lift and turned towards her top floor apartment, moving on autopilot.
'Hi.'
Ella looked up, startled.
'What are you doing here?'
'Checking that you're okay.'
'How did you get in? This is a gated property.'
'I got lucky. Someone was leaving as I arrived.'
Ella sighed as she unlocked her door. 'This is supposed to be a secure development.'
She stopped and turned as Matt made to walk in behind her.
'Matt, I'm sorry, I'm not up for company just now. It's late and I'm tired.'
'It's not that late, yet, and I'm not company Ella, I'm a friend. And I thought you might appreciate one just now.' He encouraged her through the door and closed it behind them.
'Why? What's going on?'
'You tell me.'
'I can't cope with games just now Matt. And a few kisses and phone calls don't make us friends.' Who was she trying to kid! He was becoming one of her best.
'Ouch! If I was a less confident man, I would be wounded by that comment!' Matt pulled her into his arms and resisted her struggle to escape. 'Just a cuddle Ella.'
He rested his chin on top of her head. He saw no point in beating about the bush. 'I overheard your visitor in your dressing room.'
Ella froze. 'How?'
'I was on my way to see you. There were others there too. I closed the door.'
'Oh.'
Ella moved out of his embrace and instantly missed his touch.
'Well, that was private. As you can see I'm okay, so now you can go.' She knew she sounded cold and abrupt but she didn't know how to handle the news herself yet and she wasn't used to opening up to others. It was easier to push him away.
'Not that easy sweetheart. I'm in big brother mode just now and it looks like you could do with someone to talk to.'
He pulled her back into his arms. 'I didn't hear much, but I heard enough to blow off Zander and come here.' He felt her tense again. 'Don't shut me out Ella. If you were okay, you'd be riding high - you received a standing ovation tonight from a packed Royal Albert Hall.'
Ella had almost forgotten the concert and the audience reaction. Her mind was crowded by the bombshell that had been dropped from a great height. She didn't even know why it was such a big deal. She'd often wondered about her father and as a child had frequently wished that he'd come and get her. Damn him! Why couldn't he have done all this another time! Did she even want to know him now? Her thoughts were a jumbled mess. She didn't know what to make of the news - what to make of him. Why were the press even interested? Why had they gone to him and not her? Would they now come after her?
A sob escaped her lips. Nothing had affected her this strongly since the rape. Matt loosened his embrace and lifted her chin. With his thumbs he wiped away twin tear tracks. The raw pain etched in her eyes undid him.
Holding her head with both hands he lowered his head and kissed her. The kindness was too much for Ella and she sobbed into his mouth as she kissed him back. The kiss between them was raw and frantic. Matt had intended it to offer comfort but Ella turned it wild in her anger - anger such as she'd never experienced before.
Matt fought his own desire, recognising what Ella was doing and knowing that she wasn't ready for anything more. He matched her kiss for kiss and groaned as she sucked on his tongue. She angled her mouth differently to gain deeper access. They stood there, locked in a frenzied passion until he realised his face was wet from her tears. Gently, he slowed his response to calm her.
'Sorry.' Ella was mortified. She'd just tried to eat him. What must he think of her - one minute saying they weren't friends and the next ramming her tongue down his throat.
'Don't be.' He kissed her forehead. 'When we eventually come together Ella, it will be nothing short of spectacular. But it won't be tonight, not like this.' He picked her up in his arms, took her through to the lounge at the end of the hallway and gently placed her on the sofa.
'Now, sit there a minute while I go and get you a drink. Then you're going to talk,' he said in a mock stern voice, as he removed his jacket and threw it across the back of a chair.
Ella gave him a watery half smile. 'Yes sir! You know I always envied Tess and Ronnie - having you as a big brother.' Matt gave her a gentle smile.
'Well, you've got me now - not as a big brother I hasten to add, but I'm here as a friend.'
Having checked every cupboard in her kitchen, Matt eventually returned with a small brandy and some tissues. Hoping a close connection would help her open up to him he sat on the sofa and settled her into him. He held her gently and sat quietly, watching, as she sipped the brandy.
Just as Matt was beginning to think that his silence wouldn't have the usual effect with Ella, she finally started to talk.
It seemed like a long time later when she finished telling him everything Daniel Lewis had said. The tissues in her hand had long since been shredded in her anguish.
She felt exhausted but somehow lighter for having shared the burden. Matt hadn't once interrupted, asked questions or made any observation, and for that she was grateful. She didn't think she'd made much sense but now that it was out there she thought she might be able to pick her way through it.
*
'What I don't get is why the newspaper went to him? Why are they making such a big thing of it with him and not me? I know I keep a low profile but I'm well known enough for th
e media to go after a scandal.'
'I can hazard a guess. I thought I recognised him tonight when I met him….'
Ella sat up sharply. 'When did you meet him?'
'Mr Brown brought him over to where Zander and I were sitting in the bar before the concert started.' He kissed her on the nose. 'Don't interrupt when I'm about to reveal my deduction!' He said, in a terrible Hercule Poirot impersonation.
'I thought I recognised him tonight, but I think it was the eyes I recognised. Yours are identical. Well, except the fact that they're prettier of course. Anyway, as I've listened to what you said, I've realised that I did recognise him on another level. If I'm right, then your Daniel Lewis….'
Ella scowled at him.
'Yes, your Daniel Lewis,' he pulled her back into him, 'is the Daniel Lewis, one of the greatest businessmen in the last forty years. He created and ran a billion dollar, international plastics business. If I remember correctly he's recently sold his share and retired from it but I think he still advises the government on international trade. I think if you researched him you'd find he is very well connected, highly respected and seriously wealthy.'
'He did say something about not wanting a scandal to damage his business or his reputation. My mother's never seemed very keen on having me around and now I discover my father was embarrassed at the thought of me too.'
Matt could feel himself about to walk through a minefield but he felt compelled to help her see the bigger picture.
'From what you've said, your mother intentionally seduced him at pretty much one of the lowest points of his life. His business was taking off internationally and needed his full attention and at the same time his wife was dying from cancer. He doesn't sound like he was in a good place at the time Ella. I'm not condoning his actions but it sounds like he needed the comfort of another human being. It's just unfortunate he chose someone calculating who did it for purely selfish reasons.'
Ella didn't like the way he talked about her mother, but then, wasn't that what her mother was like with everyone - she wheedled her way in somehow and stayed put as long as she could get away with it.
'But she was only nineteen! He must have been about forty! If he was a stronger man he wouldn't have given in.'
'Were you worldly wise enough at nineteen to seduce and blackmail a man?' She shook her head. 'No, so your mother was no innocent child by then.'
Matt tread carefully as he made another point. 'Ella, how easily do you think I could have taken full advantage of you earlier on?'
She coloured at how wild she'd been in his arms. Matt might have started the kiss but she'd escalated it.
'Hmm, point taken,' she admitted grudgingly. 'But why has she kept quiet all these years. When he refused to marry her, did she somehow hope to get her hands on the money he put away for my education? He only gave her a small allowance for my clothes and stuff. When she couldn't get more, why didn't she expose the affair?'
'I don't know sweetheart. Maybe Daniel had his own way of ensuring she kept it quiet. I know he hasn't been around much. Maybe she didn't think there would be anything to be gained financially when he wasn't in the country. From what I've read about him, he's spent most of his time in the US and China.'
'He told me he'd seen me a lot growing up - that he'd been to sports days and concerts and stuff. He must have travelled back for those.'
'Well, that's a sign Ella, that he did want to be involved with you.'
'When my mother removed me from school, why didn't he come then after I'd been r… taken away from the school he had insisted on?'
Matt chose not to question what she'd been about to say, or even question why she'd been removed from school. Instead he stayed focussed on her father. 'Maybe he didn't feel his lifestyle was conducive to a teenage girl that he didn't know. Trust me, I know how difficult teenage girls can be! Would you have enjoyed being taken from one country to the next by a man you didn't know and then left with a nanny or housekeeper for most of the time?'
Ella didn't think she would but then had the reality of her upbringing been any better? Matt was opening up her mind but she was still very resentful of Daniel, of her mother, of the whole sorry situation.
'You know, I always knew I'd been named after my father. I thought it had been some kind of act of love. To know that my mother gave me my name out of spite so that I could be traced easily back to him….' Ella's voice broke.
Matt hugged her closer. 'You have a beautiful name. It doesn't matter how you came by it. It's your name and so long as you like it, nothing else is relevant. The four of us were all lovingly given French and English names. Zander and I have English first names and French middle names and Tess and Ronnie have French first names and English middle names. But it took eighteen years and our parents' death for our whole life to be unravelled as a complete sham.' Matt tried to keep the bitterness out of his voice. Tonight was about Ella, not him.
Ella looked up at him and stroked his face. Matt gazed down at her as he took her hand in his and kissed the palm.
'Most people have stuff going on in their pasts Ella. What matters is how we deal with it.'
'Have you dealt with yours?'
'Tonight is about you, not me. Mine only surfaces once a year on the anniversary of the day we buried them.'
'The day we met.'
Matt gave her a pointed look.
'I'm sorry.'
'What for?'
'For being there, when you obviously wanted to be on your own.'
'Ah! But now, I'm glad you were there.' He lightly kissed her lips. It warmed her heart.
Ella wasn't quite ready to let go of all that she'd heard tonight. 'I wonder why Mr Brown convinced him to stay away when I was a teenager, when he also said he thought I had a right to know Daniel. That doesn't make sense.'
'Hmm, I can't answer that, but you said your mother had been to see him at the school at the time you were moved to another one. Maybe he sensed at that time that Daniel turning up might make things more difficult for you. Imagine if he had come on the scene, tried to get custody and failed.'
'Yeah, I suppose.'
'Mr Brown did keep in touch and between him and Daniel encouraged your music. They kept an eye on you from a distance Ella. You may not feel it just now but it does sound as if Daniel genuinely cares about you and has wanted what was best for you. Mistakenly, perhaps he thought staying away was also best for you. He didn't have to come and tell you tonight, he could have gone to ground and ignored it, but he sought you out. He wanted you to have prior warning. Sounds like he loves you Ella.' When she stayed silent, he decided to hit home the last point.
'Sounds like he'd like to be a part of your life now.'
He sat her up so he could see her clearly. 'The question is, are you going to let him? Are you going to contact him again?'
'I don't know,' she whispered, sounding torn between her pain and wanting to get to know the man who had unwittingly given her life.
Matt gave her another lingering kiss and pulled her to him for a hug.
'Well, it's very late. Go sleep on it and see how you feel in the morning.' He looked at his watch. 'Wow, it's two o'clock. I'd better be off. The press may come after you tomorrow and I don't want to stir the pot any more for you by being caught coming out of your apartment!'
*
Matt encouraged her off his lap and stood up.
'How are you going to get back? You could stay if you like.'
Matt gave her a knowing look.
'In the spare room!'
'Pity.'
Ella playfully batted him on the arm. 'Don't you ever think of anything else?'
He whispered in her ear. 'I can think of lots of things…' he paused, '…I'd like to do with you Daniella Lewis-Cannon.'
She stepped back.
Laughing, he said 'but not tonight. One day soon. You have enough to contend with just now. At least you'll be out in Quinaard soon and the press will hopefully move on to another target while you're gone.
'
'Oh, I almost forgot I was going there.' Ella looked anxious.
'Hey, you'll love it. Azzam might flirt outrageously with you but you'll be safe. Remember I'll be there too. I won't be busy in the kitchen getting the banquet ready all the time. And anyway, as a matter of honour, Azzam would never touch someone else's woman.' With that he kissed her on the cheek and slipped his jacket on.
'And whose woman would I be exactly?'
'Mine.'
'Oh, is that right?'
'Oh yes.'
Ella felt a warm glow at having him state that so categorically but now felt anxious for an altogether different reason - how long would he think that, particularly when she couldn't get beyond the rape. A man like Matt wouldn't wait around for her to overcome her fears for too long.
She noticed his car keys in his hand.
'I thought you'd come with Zander to the concert?'
'I did. We drove to Elephant and Castle and then took the Tube in.'
'Then how did he get home?'
'Zander was right behind me when we overheard Daniel's revelation. We left to go home but by the time we'd got to the Underground, I'd decided I was coming here. I left Zander to head for home whilst I headed back to Elephant and Castle to get the car.'
Ella winced. 'Bet he just loved being abandoned! Did he say anything?'
'Not a lot. He did mutter something about being a white knight, but over the years, I've learnt it's best to just ignore his fishing attempts.'
'But won't he….' Matt put his finger against her lips.
'Ella, Zander was fine. He can ask all he likes and ponder all he likes, put two and two together and think he's got the right answer, but he knows I don't say anything I don't want to. He may wonder how well I know you and he may take the piss out of me but he trusts my judgement. Besides, I'm the eldest, what can he do?' Matt grinned that big, wide, gorgeous grin of his and Ella couldn't help but smile.
'Better.' He liked that she'd finally smiled. 'In my experience with the press, you're better to be upfront with a statement - they like digging but if you open up they'll go dig someone else's dirt and leave you alone more quickly. Let me know if I can do anything.'
Heat in the Kitchen Page 8
