The other issue was we needed to finish securing the store. We needed to check the other doors in the building and make sure that they were locked. That and check the rest of the store to make sure that there were no other Zeds that had found there way in that we might have missed. Some of the others had sworn they could hear noises coming from the sales floor. We needed to make sure that we were alone.
But before we could search the building, we needed to find a way to safely handle anything we might find. Running around with a few pieces of metal and a broken broom handle wasn’t exactly the optimal situation. The truth is we really didn’t know what to do if there were any more of them still inside with us.
The infected that we had encountered, well that hadn’t gone very well. We already had one injury and despite our best efforts to not kill any of the Zeds, we had two dead already. I don’t think that anyone of us was eager to kill again, not then, but we were all well aware of the dangers they presented. We had already witnessed what they had done to Bruce. We had seen what they did to that truck driver. We knew that they attacked without hesitation and what they were capable of. But we were afraid that close contact with any of the infected would put us all at risk of infection. Well that’s at least what we thought at the time.
So we debated on what to do. We needed to be safe, and we needed to protect ourselves. But we were reluctant to just run around killing the infected. It was still early in the outbreak. We didn’t know if there was a cure coming, we didn’t know if they would get better over time. Common sense told us no, I mean we saw what they were doing. Some of them were missing limbs or had half of their insides hanging out. But there were some in our group that were still holding out hope that there was a fix in all of this. Even if all the evidence pointed to the contrary.
As it turns out many of the governments around the world had been through the same debate. Maybe that’s why it took them so long to bring in the National Guard, why it took them such a long time to respond to this crisis with force. I guess that could be one of the reasons this thing was able to spread as quickly as it did. It’s hard to blame them. It’s hard to wrap your head around something turning people into mindless monsters that were walking around killing indiscriminately. They still looked like people for the most part and deep down we had no idea what was left of those people.
I mean when you think of it, if you saw a family member, a friend, even somebody you barely knew injured, hurt, bleeding or wounded. Your first instinct isn’t to put a bullet in their head. It was to try and help them. People were only trying to help and with that they exposed themselves to this terrible virus. I wonder how many times basic concern for another person’s well being led to death in all of this. It was an issue that everyone had to get past. It was an issue that we certainly needed to get past if we had any chance of surviving this.
But we weren’t at that point yet.
So I will spare you the details of our arguments for now. The name calling and shouting about what was right and what was wrong. I will only tell you that our discussions eventually led us to the sporting goods department and we managed to get there without incident.
The reason we ended up in that particular department was because as one of the employees mentioned, there would have been plenty of options for weapons there. We found there was still ample stock of baseball bats, golf clubs, and a wide variety of camping tools that we could choose from to defend ourselves. Not to mention there were still a few shotguns and hunting rifles left in the hunting department and despite our reluctance to use them, they were at least an option for us.
From there we came up with a plan to search the rest of the building in the safest way possible. We would break off into groups and each group would be responsible for a different area on the store. We decided that if any of the groups did encounter a Zed they should try and contain them or restrain them. Block them down an aisle or isolate them in a confined area and wait for others to come so we could handle it together. Killing them was supposed to be a last resort.
We divided up into small groups. We left Bruce behind in the sporting goods department with an elderly woman named Sandy. She was in her late fifties and looked much older then that. So it was probably better that she remained back while the rest of us went out into harms way.
Each group was armed with one baseball bat or golf club and one gun. The guns were not to be used unless it was absolutely necessary. We were afraid that if a group encountered a huge number of Zeds out there, baseball bats might not be enough. But with that many guns out there we had another major concern. Friendly fire. So each group would follow a very specific path to and through the department they were responsible for searching. That way one group wouldn’t catch the other by surprise and well you get the idea.
Especially since very few in our group had actually used a gun before. Anne and Paul were the only two that had any real experience with firearms and only a handful of the others had actually fired one before. I had only ever fired a handgun once at a range a few years back. I was a terrible shot then and I was pretty sure that hadn’t changed. But Paul felt that experience was enough and he handed me one of the shotguns.
So each group went their separate way. Kerri was partnered with me. Paul went out with a young African-American woman named Tanya. Anne went with Ray and Cody, Trevor and a young man named Adam headed off together looking for customers we had missed or something much worse.
I have to admit I felt a little safer with the shotgun in my hands. However, the quick tutorial that Anne had given me did very little to calm the uneasiness I was feeling about actually having to use it. I was also a little worried that if we did run into something out there, the young woman standing next to me could do much of anything. She stood about five foot-six and weighed about hundred pounds or so and I doubted she could muster enough force with that bat to stop anyone. But I was hopeful that it wouldn’t come to that.
Kerri and I made our way through our section with no real sign of anything. We checked behind every corner and searched anywhere someone could be hiding. We were very cautious, we moved slowly and constantly checked our surroundings. We only stopped once. It was at the front end of the store as we passed the front doors. Kerri said something that I couldn’t make out and then suddenly she stopped.
At first, I didn’t see what she was looking at. The group of Zeds that were pressed up against the outside set of glass doors were still there and it appeared that there were more of them then before. Shatterproof glass I remember telling myself. I felt the need to tell Kerri that as well.
But that wasn’t what she had been looking at. She pointed out to a silver car that looked like it had to be from the eighties. The driver’s side door was wide open, but there was no sign of anyone inside the car. When she told me that the car belonged to Scott, terrible thoughts filled my head. I tried to tell her that he most likely had to run away before he could get into his car and that he was probably safe somewhere down the road. Of course I couldn’t know that and I don’t think she believed it, but it was enough for both of us to keep moving.
The gun was heavy. I had never held a shotgun before and I remember the weight had caught me by surprise. The store was a ghost town and except for the faint sounds coming from the other groups it was completely silent. That was about the point that I realized that the two of us hadn’t really said a word to each other since we had seen Scott’s car abandoned outside. I think it was probably because we were both so on edge. The eerie silence was unnerving and my imagination was running wild with what could be around each corner. So I tried making small talk despite how forced it must have seemed to her.
Then as we approached the far end of the grocery department we both heard something. We stopped. Then we heard it again. It sounded as if someone was banging on a sheet of metal or pounding on a metal door. My first thought was that it was one of the other teams trying to force something open but once we realized that it was coming from the section we wer
e supposed to be searching, we knew it couldn’t be them. So we did what we were supposed to do. He walked towards the noise, both scared, both nervous and both unsure of what we might find when we got there.
We were able to pin point where the sound had been coming from with relative ease. We found the exact area where the noise was coming from and found a small hallway that led to the customer washrooms. It was well lit and had one door on our left and two on our right. As we moved down the hallway we could tell that the banging was getting progressively louder. We should have done what we were supposed to do. We should have gone back and waited for the others. But we didn’t.
I put my ear up against each of the doors and it was clear as day that the sound was coming from inside the women’s washroom. I looked back at Kerri waiting for her to talk me out of what we were planning on doing. She didn’t. So I put my shoulder into the door and slowly pushed it open. Once inside I aimed the shotgun at the space in front of me only to find that there was nothing there except for a white concrete wall and it was forcing me to go to my right. I could hear the sound much clearer at that point. My heart was pounding and I could feel my palms getting damp.
It felt like an eternity passed in-between each and ever step as I moved along the wall and prepared to look around the corner into the main part of the washroom. Kerri followed close behind with her baseball bat in the air ready to swing. I was just hoping it was a woman trapped in a bathroom stall.
I turned the corner and raised the shotgun trying to remember not to pull the trigger unless I had too. That was when I saw it. A man roughly six feet tall and very stocky was pounding on the door of the middle stall. The lack of color in his face and his clumsy movements told me that he had been infected. We should have gone back. We should have went and found the others. But instead I made a stupid mistake.
I asked if he was okay.
It was the first thing that came to mind and to this day I still can’t believe that I made that mistake. I should have known better even then. That was when the man turned away from the door slowly, his head jerked around in horrifying fashion and he looked directly at me.
His eyes were focused on me and he started stumbling towards Kerri and I. The washroom wasn’t that big. There wasn’t that much room to begin with and he was starting to close in quickly. I could see the blood on the sleeve of his shirt. He had scratches from fingernails that covered his neck. He labored with each step and his head jerked back and forth as he tried to pick up his pace and close the gap between us.
I warned him to stop. I told him to stay where he was. I was trying to reason with him. But I should have known better. He took another step closer. I don’t know why I expected him to listen. I made the same mistake that Anne had made. It was the same mistake that the cop had made earlier that morning.
I warned him again. I told him I would shoot. I warned him. I find it funny that when people swear that they are going to shoot, it usually means that they won’t. So I swore again that I would fire if he took one step closer.
I could hear Kerri whisper in my ear to shoot him. I knew that was supposed to be a last resort. But the thing in front of us had clearly shaken her. Hell it had shaken me. He was getting closer.
She pleaded with me to shoot him but I was ignoring her. I was trying to line up my shot and go through the check list that Anne had given me in our quick tutorial on how to use the shotgun. I tucked the stock firmly in my shoulder like I was supposed too. I aimed like I was supposed too and then I went to squeeze the trigger like I was supposed too.
Nothing.
There was a scream from behind me and I remember trying to squeeze the trigger again. Nothing happened. Then I did what every idiot does in the movies when the gun doesn’t work. I looked down at it for a spit second as if I would be able to recognize what the problem was. That was when I felt a hand grab the front of my shirt and I knew I was in trouble.
There was yelling and screaming and my mind started to race. I raised the gun up and stuck it sideways into the man’s neck. His other hand grabbed a hold of my shoulder and I just kept pushing his face back as hard as I could. Jamming the gun with as much force as I could into his neck. I pushed him back against the wall and then he forced me back out into the middle of the washroom. That was when I saw the bat come flying around from behind me.
The bat struck the face of the Zed and it knocked him back a few steps. I had to give it to Kerri. She hit him hard and she had bought me some time. Then she stepped between the man and me and started swinging the bat widely back and forth. She hit him in the arm, she hit him in the shoulder, and then she struck him with everything she had right in the chest. It was enough to knock him back against the far wall and instead of both of us making a break for it I was busy trying to figure out what was wrong with the gun.
I couldn’t understand why it wasn’t working. But then again I didn’t know enough about guns to troubleshoot the problem. So I did the only thing I could think of at that time. I raised the stock of the gun up in the air and started to charge at him. He took a step right for me and we met somewhere in the middle. I jammed the stock of the gun right into his face and I swear to you that I heard his nose break on impact. But he barely flinched as I smashed him in the face.
Then I don’t know if I slipped on the bathroom floor or if he simply overpowered me, but he had a hold of me and I was falling backwards to the ground. I landed hard on my back and he was on top of me. I had managed to get one of my knees into his midsection and the gun was jammed sideways right into his throat again. But it was taking everything I had to keep some distance between us.
I remember consciously turning my head so that his drool wouldn’t land anywhere near my mouth. That and the muscles in my arms were burning as I tried to push his face further and further away. He was dead weight and I don’t say that jokingly. It took everything I had to keep us separated. I could see just past his head that Kerri was behind him and beating him with the bat. I don’t think he noticed. There was so much noise in that small bathroom. I could hear Kerri shouting and I was most likely screaming but I can’t remember for sure. The one sound that I do remember was the clicking.
The Zed kept biting air as he pushed his face closer to mine. His teeth made a terrible clicking sound every time he bit down. There was a foul order coming off of him, the disgusting smell of disease that usually fills hospital hallways. His arms still had a firm grip on my shoulders and there was no way I could muster enough strength to push him off of me. We were at a stalemate. But deep down I knew, chances were that my arms were going to give out long before he gave up.
Kerri had dropped her bat at that point and was desperately trying to pull him off of me. I just remember thinking about how bad it was going to hurt when he finally did bite down into my flesh. I could feel the grip he had on my shoulders getting firmer I was so scared that his fingernails were going to dig into my skin. I had never been so afraid in my life.
What happened next was an overlooked variable in that washroom. If I had been thinking clearly I would have realized that there must have been a reason as to why that monster was banging on that stall door. I only saw the blur of a person charging towards me and I flinched just as they put their shoulder into the Zed on top of me. The force of the blow knocked him off of me and suddenly I was free. I tried to race to my feet but to my surprise the Zed and I both made it onto one knee at about the same time. I shoved him as hard as I could and that was just enough to push him back far enough for me to regroup.
In all of the confusion, I had forgotten about that stall. There had been a woman trapped in there by the Zed that I had just led away from her. She had finally had a chance to get out of there and her actions had just bought me some precious time. But that wasn’t all she did. Once I had freed myself from the Zed’s hold she reached over and clicked the safety on the top of the shotgun off. The one thing that I had forgot to do that I was supposed to do. Anne had pointed it out. She had told me about it.
She just thought it would be safer to have the safety on considering my lack of experience. I don’t think she believed that I would have to use the gun. I wish she had been right.
I gathered myself as quickly as I could. I moved the gun into a firing position and took aim at the infected man just as he regained his footing. I remember seeing his head jerk over in Kerri’s direction and that was when I panicked. His attention had turned to her and I knew I needed to do something fast.
I warned the two women in the washroom to get clear as he started moving for Kerri and I squeezed the trigger. That time something did happen. My shot hit the man right below his left kneecap, blowing away most of his shin. He fell hard as he lost his balance and he smacked his face on the bathroom floor.
I guess that is why you don’t close your eyes when you’re taking a shot. I was actually aiming for his chest. The one thing that nobody ever mentioned to me was how loud the gunshot would be, especially in such a small bathroom like that one. My ears were ringing to the point where they almost hurt. But worst of all was that I forgot to tuck the stock firmly into my shoulder. The recoil, one of the things Anne had warned me about had kicked the gun back right into my shoulder. There was a shooting pain running all throughout my shoulder and arm. So I couldn’t hear well, I was in a tremendous amount of pain, my senses were all disorientated and now the Zed was crawling along the ground, coming right for me. I wish we would have just gone back and got the others.
In Hiding: A Survivors Journal of the Great Outbreak Page 5
