“I fell,” she said.
“How?”
“I’m clumsy. I drank too much beer?”
“You said you were going to watch movies with your friend,” I said. Aaryn studied us like he wasn’t sure what he should do next. My stomach flipped. I sighed and gave my sister a squeeze. “Let’s get you cleaned up. Come on in, Aaryn.” What? I don’t know what possessed me to invite him in. It just came out.
“Whose party were you at?” My voice wavered as Aaryn followed us inside. Seriously, she was going to get herself killed. I switched Nell to the other hip and thrust a handful of wet paper towels at my sister. “I thought you were done with all that trouble.”
“It smells good in here,” Leah mumbled. The chocolate chip cookies I’d baked—Danny’s favorite—cooled on the counter, my open social studies book beside them. I’d been studying between batches. Social studies: still the most pointless course in the history of high school. The tests were so hard, all those names and dates, made worse by lack of sleep.
I had to review those chapters before the night was over.
“Help yourself.” I nodded to Aaryn. “You can have one, too.”
It was weird having a guy in the house. The lavender walls, the lace curtains, Mom’s eggplant-colored sofa. He held his elbow as he stood next to the lamp with the jeweled fringe.
Leah chewed slowly. “I saw Danny.”
“Okay. So you were at Dmitri’s.”
Aaryn bit into his cookie and smiled. “You made this?”
“Yes,” I said. “My wild Thursday-night plans.”
“But—how?”
“Just followed the recipe,” I said. “Added a little love.”
“Recipe?”
Leah and I watched him for a couple of seconds before he said, “Oh. Recipe. Anyway, they’re really good.”
“They’re for Danny. It’s our one-year anniversary tomorrow.”
“He brought Jen to the party,” Leah said. She pushed her cookie aside on the place mat.
“Jen who?” When my heart sped up, I pretended to be very busy fixing Nell’s shirt, which was always riding up above her baby stomach.
“Jen from your class, the only Jen we know. Did he tell you they were going together? He didn’t, did he?”
I held my sister’s gaze. “I’m not getting into this with you.”
“I don’t think they expected me to be there.”
“You shouldn’t have been there, that’s why.”
Aaryn picked up another cookie without asking. What was he thinking of my life? My living room? The baby bouncer, the swing, the bottles I hadn’t had a chance to wash? I fit Nell into her swing, but she squirmed angrily. I jabbed the power button for the music. Electronic violins, some kind of reggae beat, played over the sound of the swing gears. “Did you say anything to him?” I didn’t want to seem like I was pumping her for information.
I wanted to ask her so bad.
“I called him an asshole,” Leah said, quite proud of the fact. “I told him he shouldn’t be at a party with another girl while you’re at home taking care of Nell.”
“He’s just trying to have a life.” My throat felt really dry. “What do you think, Aaryn?”
His eyebrows shot up. A few cookie crumbs fell from his lips. “Me?”
“What do you think about Danny going to a party with another girl? A friend, maybe? Someone he’s grown up with?”
“Oh, uh…I’m the one who invited Jen to the party.” He paused and grabbed a third cookie fast. “Not Danny. We rode in his truck, though.”
Thank God. I faced my sister with my hands on my hips. “All that drama for nothing.”
Leah’s eyes narrowed. “Why didn’t Danny tell me that? I called him out on it, and he acted so stupid.”
Aaryn finished the cookie, holding the tip of his thumb in his mouth. “I wasn’t really paying attention.”
Leah grabbed an ice pack from the freezer and held it against one half of her mouth. “Megan told me he was saying how hard it is to be a teen dad. Give me a break. Real hard, talking about it at drinking parties.”
Nell started to cry, a nasally, coughing kind of cry, which usually meant she was really tired. “He does the best he can.”
“It’s like you’re not even dating him anymore, you’re like, life-following. You follow whatever he wants, and he does whatever he wants. I’m sick of seeing him at parties. All I can think about is how he shouldn’t be there. He should be home with you.”
I sighed, so, so tired of this conversation and of worrying. I hadn’t told her about Louisiana, but she was acting like she knew. Life-following. I stopped the swing. Nell smiled at me.
“You don’t get it,” I said. She wasn’t thinking about all the good times Danny and I had shared. The school dances, the dates when it was just us two, and our double dates with Peyton and Nick. “But I guess I do hope that he’s not giving Jen a ride home. They’re not that great of friends.”
“Right, while you’re sitting here with a kitchen full of his favorite cookies,” Leah said.
Aaryn inched toward a fourth—yes, fourth—cookie.
“Hey—save some for Danny,” I said.
“Sorry. They’re just really good.” Nell cooed for his attention and he grinned. “She looks a lot like you.”
My little babe. I picked her up and kissed her cheek, bringing her closer to him. She tried to whack him with her fist.
“Can I hold her?”
I shrugged. “Sure.”
I fit Nell into his hands. She was wide-eyed and excited, pounding him with both fists. His chest appeared solid enough for the beating. “Hi, sweetie,” he said, and Nell answered with her adorable baby talk, cute enough to make me think it had all been worth it.
Then she puked.
“Oh my God.” I grabbed her burp rag as Leah snorted, and began to wipe the white stain on his shirt. The fabric puckered where the liquid sank in. “I’m so sorry. That’s probably why she was crying.”
Aaryn held Nell at arm’s length, like he was afraid she might do it again. “Wow. That’s a first.”
Smiling, I gathered her up and cradled her. Funny how shocking puke could be when it wasn’t part of your everyday routine.
“Oh well, a little puke never killed anyone, right?” he said.
I aimed and tossed the rag at his chest.
“Hey!” He dodged that thing pretty fast.
“How old are you?” Leah asked. Great, now she was interested in him. I knew my sister too well.
“Nineteen.” He picked at his shirt to help it dry. “Hey, Karma, did you know I’m going fishing with Danny tomorrow?”
“Oh?” I filled a bottle with water, then shook the formula out.
“Yeah.” Aaryn sat on one of the stools behind the kitchen island, the one with the ruffled vinyl edge. “I told him to invite you to the café after, but I think he took it the wrong way. He got kind of jealous.”
My face flushed at the thought. Danny, jealous of Aaryn? “Really? Well, tell him I said sure. That would be nice.” I smoothed Nell’s hair from her ear to her neck with my fingertip. Silky and soft, so precious. “I mean, it’s our anniversary, so it would be nice to get some extra time together.”
“Is he normally a pretty jealous guy?”
“Danny? Oh no, not really. I don’t know.”
Aaryn clapped his hand to his forehead. “Duh—I guess he’d rather hang out with you instead of fishing. Not too romantic if I’m there. I’ll cancel.”
“No, no, no, it’s okay, really. You don’t have to cancel. I have dance and homework, and it’s not like we have a sitter.” Nell squirmed when I hugged her. “Do you want to see what I got him?”
“The suspense is killing me,” Leah said.
“Yes,” Aaryn said.
It wasn’t until I was at my bedroom door that I realized he’d followed me. “Oh, uh, you can just wait in the kitchen.” But the door opened when Nell banged on it, and he saw the mess, my God,
how embarrassing. Thankfully the path to Nell’s crib and her neat pile of belongings looked somewhat responsible.
“You weren’t supposed to see that,” I said, flipping on the light. I really had to make it a priority to clean my room.
“I mean, who could expect that your clothes would, you know, go into the basket instead of onto the floor?” Aaryn said.
“Shut up. I have bad aim. And bad rebound.” I found Danny’s gift among the clutter without any problem.
“Here it is. Cute, right?” The photo frame had three images. “This one’s from homecoming, the day I knew he was my Mr. Right.” I wore a pink dress; he, a suit coat and baseball cap. Aaryn’s smile had changed to a weird half gape. “I was so nervous,” I said, and let out a weird, three-second giggle, almost like I was there again. Maybe my nerves had something to do with how crowded the hall felt with Aaryn next to me. He seemed comfortable standing inches away. “I guess this one speaks for itself.” The shot of me and Danny, him giving my belly a thumbs-up—classic. Nell kept trying to grab the frame. “So yeah. That’s his gift.”
“ ‘You’re my everything,’ ” he read aloud, which is what I’d doodled across the final photo, one of me taken during a dance shoot.
“Is it dumb?” I cradled the frame against my chest, feeling insecure from the intense look he was giving me.
“Not at all.” He nodded, urging me to show him again, one finger on the corner of the frame. “That pose is amazing.”
“Oh, thanks. Juliette’s a nag about angles. I hope Danny likes it.”
“Me too.” Nell beat his shoulder. “I really don’t want to take up all his time tomorrow. Maybe you two can make plans.”
“Maybe.” I felt jumpy from all the questions I wanted to ask. “Anyway, are you and Jen dating, then? You just moved here, right? The girls told me about the hike.”
Aaryn cleared his throat. “I’m not seeing anyone right now.”
My pulse was erratic from the stress of Leah, the Jen thing. Lots of things. “Oh. Okay.” I tapped Nell’s diaper. The reggae music on her swing was still on, so I wound my way through the room and turned it off. Maybe Danny would leave the party early if I asked. It would be really good to see him, maybe just sit on the couch and watch a movie while I finished my homework. Something.
“I’m going to bed before Mom gets home,” Leah said. Aaryn took this as his cue to leave.
“Yeah, well, great,” he said. “Glad you got home okay.” He stood in the entry with lace curtains framing him. The puke stain had dried into a crusty smear. He extended his hand and my heart did a leap. “Here’re the keys.”
“Oh, of course, thank you.”
Leah waved and made her way to the bathroom. After a second of hesitation, I walked over. Even though he smelled like smoke, I felt relaxed around him. He had an honest face, like he wouldn’t bullshit me. His gaze was direct. Curious. “Thanks for tonight,” I said. “I’m glad you were at the party to help Leah. She’s annoying, but I love her.”
“I know.” He reached for the door. Nell was punching me, eyes glued to his face. She found him very intriguing. “It’s good to see you again, Karma.”
He left before I could find my voice. I shivered. The dead bolt clipped in place, me with my eyes closed, inhaling Nell’s scent in long, even breaths.
He was the one who invited Jen.
With a satisfied nod, I messaged Danny. He’d probably want to ditch that stupid party and be with his girls. He loved my chocolate chip cookies.
Day 10
“Ready to catch some fish?” Danny said. There was no hint of enthusiasm in his voice. He had dark circles under his eyes and a scrape on his jaw.
“Oh, we’re still on?”
“Yeah, why wouldn’t we be?”
“Uh, no reason. I’m ready.” I had a new plan—make that a very necessary plan—after his near freak-out over me “liking Karma” the night before. First part of the new plan? I had to stay cool. So far, me leaning against the wall with an open copy of Fight Club, not at all wondering if Karma might meander by? Check and check.
“Before I forget—you were great at practice yesterday.”
“You think so?”
I clapped his shoulder. “Definitely. You had some nice moves out there. Best I’ve seen in a while. I told Walt he has to start you next game.”
He grinned. “Awesome. Thanks, man.”
When Karma rounded the corner, his mouth went straight. I pretended to be very interested in the view outside.
“Hey, guys.”
“Oh, hey,” Danny said. “We were just heading out.”
“Do you guys have plans after?” Her question seemed rehearsed.
I could feel her gaze on me as I held the door for them, standing well out of the way. Definitely no eye contact as she passed. The fact that she smelled so good? Well. Nothing I could do about that.
“I might go to Dmitri’s and do some homework,” Danny said. He was acting weird, stiff-walking, his chest sticking out. “Why, what’s up?”
“Oh, nothing. I might have some free time later if you want to do something. I miss you.”
Her eyes had shadows under them, like his, her hair in a messy ponytail. Not that I, you know, noticed.
Danny sighed. “I’m pretty beat. I got this fishing thing now. A bunch of homework.”
Karma waved her hand. “Don’t worry about it.” She smiled, shaking her head. “Nell woke up twice last night, little turd. I barely slept.”
“Tell me about it,” Danny said. “I was at the party until three.”
“Did you have fun?”
“We can skip fishing if you guys want to hang out,” I said. Danny blinked, gaze all shifty.
“We better get to the lake,” he said.
“Yeah, okay.” Karma’s voice was soft. She seemed to be trying really hard not to let the conversation—or the Jen thing last night—bother her. “See you around.”
She waved and the bracelet on her arm slid down, simple beads with Nell’s initial dangling in gold.
His truck reeked of smoke. I’d barely shut the door when he blasted out of the school parking lot, hip-hop rattling on the speakers. We almost died on the way there. Twice. Apparently he wanted to prove he was the world’s worst driver with the world’s worst sound system. I sat without taking off my seat belt or talking when we arrived. Ahead of us the water was sparkling in the sun, really bright.
“Grab the bait,” Danny said, two poles in hand, marching to the aluminum boat that lay on the bank. He wasn’t treating me like a coach.
“Bait?” I slammed the door.
“The bucket.”
The breeze felt good, like it might help me think straight. A jagged row of old, tall pine trees reflected along the back of the lake, blue sky and clouds on the rest. Peaceful. The opposite of what I was feeling. I gripped the metal handle.
Danny flipped the boat by himself. “Pick up that side.”
Sand scraped the bottom and then water churned as the boat cut through the lake’s surface. I jumped in and grabbed the edges as he rowed toward a patch of lily pads, feeling like I should be more relaxed. More focused. We were alone, stuck on a boat, and fishing was going to take some time.
Danny spit into the lake. Within seconds, the white spot disappeared.
“Was that a fish?” I asked.
“Yep.”
“Wow.” I sighed and picked up one of the fishing rods, holding it out. Phoebe would have hated the lake. Not enough going on. “So. Long night at the shack?”
Danny wiped his face with his arm, hesitating with the oars skimming the surface. “You missed a good time.” He grinned and dug in the oars. “We went skinny-dipping.”
“What’s skinny-dipping?”
“Seriously?”
“Yeah, I…uh, never mind.”
“Chicks getting naked, man.”
The water danced. “And then what?” I asked.
“Nothing, really. Everyone was wasted. Good
time, though.”
“Just so you know, I never meant to sound interested in your girl.”
“Hey, man, it’s cool. I’m used to guys checking her out. Doesn’t really bother me.”
“It’s just that—I had a girl like her once.” I rested my arm across my knee. I was thinking of Phoebe. “Yeah, my girl was special, but we were young, too young, probably. Losing her was the biggest mistake of my life.” I hadn’t even said goodbye.
We’d stopped in the water, the boat sounding hollow as he placed the oars along the bottom. “You’re still pretty young,” he said.
“Yeah, I know, but I’m just saying—you can’t let a girl like that get away.” I cringed at how corny I sounded. What I wouldn’t give now for an arrow, the right arrow. Shoot him and be done with it. My face felt hot.
“She’s probably not too happy with me today,” he said.
“Oh? She seemed okay.”
“She’s always on my case, man, thinking I hide shit. It’s like I can’t breathe without running it by her first.”
“My girl was like that, too.” She was nothing like that. Sometimes I wondered if Phoebe had liked me as much as I liked her. If she’d planned her days around me the way I did her.
Danny stared at the water. “Yeah.” He grunted. “We’ll see how college goes.”
“What do you mean?”
“I’m going to Central Louisiana State University in the fall. I got a scholarship.”
I tried to act cool, which equated to me sitting up with too-wide eyes. “What about Karma?”
“I think she’s planning to go to Wist. I don’t know.”
“Wist?”
“This stuck-up art school in New York.”
“Oh, you’ll be long-distance, then.” I almost added, right? “But, uh, what about Nell? Won’t it be hard to live that far away?”
“Look, man, this really isn’t your problem.”
The understatement of the millennium. He handed me a small gray bait fish. I slid the hook through its head, like he had. Any thought of them staying together seemed far from his mind.
“I guess I thought you two were close to getting married or something.”
“Married?” Danny wound the line until a tiny steel knob drew up to the tip. “We’re seniors! Are you serious?”
Arrows Page 6
