It would be easy to get involved in working on two shows, maybe even returning to recording and touring, and convince herself that she was fine on her own. She’d become adept at pushing her feelings down in the years since Tori’s death, and this would be no different. She’d never forget him, but she’d no doubt tell herself that she didn’t deserve him and would move on with a semblance of a life. In her heart, she knew she wouldn’t take the steps to become a certified teacher or a therapist, and, truthfully, she wondered if that would even be enough for her if she did. Before she retreated within herself, her music career had been exhilarating. Now that she could sing again, there was a chance she could return to the way it had once been. It wouldn’t be the same without Tori, but she had to move on somehow.
Was there a way to balance a relationship with Gavin with a revived singing career? Would that be enough for him?
He wasn’t the kind of man to go for a watered-down commitment. He was serious, and he was future-focused. She had to be all in with him or nothing, and while she knew she wanted to, she didn’t know if she could.
She sat up straighter in her chair, focusing on the meeting and pushing her romantic ruminations aside.
“How does the Musical Chairs schedule work with America’s Next Country Star?”
“Currently, we’re in production at the same time as America’s Next Country Star,” the producer answered. “That might make for some long days, but the good news is, from what I can tell, our shoots are shorter since there’s no extra activity like on your other show. Without the mentoring and practice with the contestants, your time commitment will be significantly shorter. We also shoot on a condensed schedule, so while the days can be long, you’re done with the contract much sooner.”
“It might not be easy, but we can make it happen. I’ll need to chat with Macy privately before we make any decisions.” Her agent’s neutral tone didn’t give anything away. One of the things Macy had always loved about her was that she kept their enthusiasm for projects quiet until terms were agreed upon. Nobody could ever get away with a lowball offer because they knew Macy wanted the job.
Still, knowing how easy it would be to shut down the part of her that wanted to fall in love by filling the time with other obligations tempted her to take the job without any further consideration or negotiation. Life would be easier without a relationship with Gavin. She wouldn’t have to stretch and grow, would never have to open herself up to the possibility of loss, and wouldn’t have to learn how to be vulnerable and intimate with someone. She could throw herself headfirst into revitalizing her career and probably stage a big comeback.
It was too late to protect herself, though. Gavin was already in her heart, and she’d already been intoxicated by the hint of what life with him could be like. She’d never be able to forget what she’d longed for, and in her heart she knew that work alone couldn’t fulfill her anymore.
Karen wrapped up the meeting with her customary brisk manner. “The show is great, and I think it would be an amazing experience. We’ll discuss it and get back to you.”
The show producer and her agent packed up their things, and the producer shook hands with Macy. “It was nice to meet you. I look forward to hearing from you.”
“You, too, thanks.” Damn it, the show did sound amazing, and before she fell for Gavin, it would’ve been a dream job. Already, her heart beat for him, and a future without him was unthinkable. She couldn’t stay in Nashville and have Gavin, but would she regret turning down the show to go full circle back to the small, nowhere town of Sweet Ridge? If she could be with him, her tiny hometown wouldn’t seem so unimpressive. Was there a way to have a career and a life with Gavin?
When the door closed, Macy and Karen were alone in the huge room. Karen scooted her chair closer to Macy, grinning.
“So? What do you think? Musical Chairs is amazing, and you’ll be terrific on it!”
A month ago, this would’ve been a no-brainer: popular show, worked with her schedule, a way to move forward with her television career. Now, the thought of coming back to her old life in Nashville, without Gavin, left her feeling cold. And even if their relationship didn’t last, he’d awakened the sleeping giant within her. She couldn’t continue hiding from her true passion, and she had to start making music again.
“Honestly, I think I’d like to pass.” A thrill skipped down her spine with the realization that she was ready to put plans into motion.
Karen sat back, her expression carefully neutral. “Oh?”
“When I was back home in Sweet Ridge, I spent some time with some very special people, and something just opened up inside of me. I want to sing again.”
A huge grin took over Karen’s face. She leaned forward and slapped the table with an open palm. “Hot damn, girl! Why didn’t you say so in the first place? This is great news!”
“I’m glad to hear you say that, because there’s no way I can do it without you.”
• • •
Macy had only been gone for a few days, but it seemed like a lifetime. Gavin parked at the edge of the gym’s parking lot, grabbed his bag from the passenger seat, and jogged across the expanse of simmering asphalt to meet Grayson. Greeting the receptionist at the desk as he checked in, Gavin scanned the cardio section as he hurried toward the locker room. Grayson wasn’t warming up on a treadmill, so maybe he wasn’t as late as he’d feared. A family had brought in a sick puppy mere minutes before closing time, and he didn’t have the heart to turn them away. Staying late was never fun, but it was par for the course.
The little kitten Macy had brought in was still in residence at the clinic, spending her days at the office and her nights with whichever tech was available to take her. Lady Marceline was in good spirits and healing nicely, much to Merle’s delight. Gavin didn’t have the heart to tell his old friend they weren’t going to keep the little fuzz ball.
After changing into shorts and a T-shirt, Gavin slammed his locker closed just as he spotted Grayson walking in, deep in conversation on his phone.
Gray gave a nod of greeting and opened his own locker, pushing his shoes in and pulling off his socks, all while murmuring into the phone. Gavin motioned that he was going to get started and left Grayson to change. The whirring of treadmills and elliptical trainers, the pounding of basketballs on the nearby court, and lively music pumped into the gym lifted his spirits a bit and giving him something to look forward to for the first time that day. Glad for the chance to forget about work and Macy for a while, he set up the resistance and elevation on a treadmill, hopped on, and started walking. Grayson joined him, looking like he needed the run just as much as Gavin did.
“What’s going on? Another avocado emergency?” Gavin increased the speed on the treadmill a bit, warming up.
“It’s always something. One of the new guys on the line couldn’t keep up, and instead of asking for help, he let a bunch of avocados pile up. Fixing his mess was a big hassle, but it was the kind of thing that wouldn’t have fazed me at all a month ago.”
Gavin picked up his pace, enjoying a light jog but still able to talk comfortably. “You feeling off your game since Dad screwed you over?”
“Yeah.” Grayson pushed his own pace up to match Gavin’s. “I don’t know if I’m coming or going anymore, and I can’t decide if I’m more confused or pissed off that Dad gave Becca my half of the company. She wasn’t even at the plant when all this went down, and I wanted to call her and make her fix it.”
“Maybe you should have.” Gavin paused to catch his breath. “You know, give her a taste of what it’s like to run the company.”
“I am holding out hope that I’ll be able to buy her shares. I’m not quite ready to give up control to her yet.” Grayson upped his pace until he was almost running, his feet pounding on the treadmill’s belt. “I sit at my desk and stare at that stupid strawberry, trying to figure out what the hell it means.”
“I don’t know what the glasses have to do with me or Macy, but I’m st
arting to think Dad was on to something when he brought her back into my life.” Not to be outdone, Gavin upped his own pace until it was all he could do to force the words out. “If she’s the past he’s talking about …”
They ran in silence for a few minutes, pushing their limits. Gavin used the time to imagine a future where Macy didn’t return to Sweet Ridge. Since their night together, all he’d wanted was to be with her. He was probably coming on too strong. They weren’t even dating, and he was already thinking of making her his wife. He didn’t do halfway, though, and neither did Macy. She didn’t sail to the top of their class effortlessly; she studied her ass off. He’d been so pissed about her pulling that stunt that guaranteed she’d be valedictorian, but he knew he would’ve done the same thing. Young and Wilde didn’t top the charts with every album they put out and sell out concerts in every state of the nation because she half-assed things. No, when Macy did something, she went all in.
Maybe forcing her to come to Sweet Ridge to deal with the house was their dad’s way of setting up a situation where she’d realize they were a perfect match and suddenly all her misgivings would disappear. If that was the case and his dad had orchestrated their romance, he obviously didn’t know Macy as well as he thought. He hadn’t accounted for her ability to deny her heart and move on without a second thought. Knowing how serious Gavin was about family and the future, it didn’t make sense that their father would try to get them together.
He and Grayson slowed their paces until they were walking again, their heart rates returning to normal. A good, hard run was the best way he knew to keep his head clear, but Macy had him completely turned around.
They wiped down their machines and headed to the free weights room.
Gavin slapped his little brother on the back. “You know, we could always call it a day and go grab some beers instead of torturing ourselves.” He took a long drink from his water bottle. “We definitely deserve to take a little break.”
“Not today, dude. I had a big lunch.” He patted his stomach. “I’m not about to let myself go. It’ll be a cold day in hell before you see me with love handles.”
“It’s a good thing I have you around to keep me in line, then.” Gavin laughed, glad for the distraction from Macy. “I’d be halfway through a pitcher by now if it was up to me.”
Grayson grabbed a kettle bell off the rack and moved aside so Gavin could choose his. “That doesn’t sound good. How’s it going with you and Macy?”
“Terrible. I should’ve stuck to trying to get the house and never have gotten tangled up with her. She’s impossible to figure out. One minute she’s avoiding me, the next she’s all over me and telling me that she wants a future together, but then I find out she was about to leave town without saying good-bye.”
“All that in a couple of days? You two don’t waste any time,” Grayson teased as he curled the weight, working his biceps.
“If we didn’t already know each other, it might have been too fast. But you know, somehow it was right.” Gavin hefted his kettle bell, mirroring his brother. “Given her track record, though, I probably messed everything up.”
“If she’s the one who was going to leave without saying anything, how did you mess everything up?” Gage asked.
“She wrote me a note that I didn’t see until after we … well, anyway, she wrote it before. I think she would’ve stayed to figure out how we could make it work if I hadn’t stopped her.” Gavin switched arms, pumping out more reps even though the workout wasn’t cutting it tonight. “I couldn’t stand the thought of falling in love with her and having her change her mind again, so I told her to take time to think about what she really wants.”
“And you think that if she has a chance to think about it, she’ll decide that she doesn’t want a relationship?” Grayson asked.
“That’s exactly what I think. She’s had years of practice at distracting herself from relationships and real life with work. I think it will be easy for her to do it again.” He grabbed a second kettle bell for his squats. “I don’t know, maybe I should’ve taken her at her word instead of giving her a chance to change her mind, but I’d always be waiting for her to disappear if I didn’t. She literally made two huge life decisions in one day. I couldn’t trust that she was sure, even if she thought she was. I mean, she was going to hop on a plane and fly out of my life.”
“But if you two have something, surely it won’t be easy for her to let it go.” Grayson seemed confident; Gavin wished he felt the same.
“I think she’s scared, and there’s a good chance she’ll take what she thinks is the safe route.” He watched his reflection in the mirror as he moved. “I shouldn’t have let her go. And I damn sure shouldn’t have put it all on her. I can’t ask her to decide between me and her life. She’s the one with the big career; I can be a vet anywhere. I blew it.” He hefted the weight with more force than was necessary, punishing his muscles for the mess his mouth got him into.
“You did the right thing.” Grayson set his weights down and clapped Gavin’s shoulder. “You don’t want her to make a quick decision only to regret it and run away later. This is the only way you’ll know that if she says she wants a relationship, she means it.”
“I hope that’s the case.” Gavin wiped his forehead with his gym towel. “If she does want to be with me after finding out what a complete asshole I can be, then I can let her decide if she wants to come back to Sweet Ridge or if I’m packing my bags and moving to Nashville.”
Grayson resumed his workout with the weights. “You know what, though? Why are you the one who has to wait for her to decide what she wants?” And there it was, the slightly mocking dig he’d expected to hear all evening. Grayson was never one to chase after women, and he definitely wouldn’t let one get under his skin like this. Their dad might have been the one who turned everything upside down, but the women in the mix weren’t making things any easier.
“You’re right.” Left without the house or the girl, Gavin didn’t know what his future held, and there were few things he hated more than not being able to plan ahead. With two wildly different outcomes possible, he was even more uncomfortable. As much as he loved Sweet Ridge and had made it his mission to make an impact on the small town, he wasn’t sure he could live here if Macy claimed the house and still threw him out. He couldn’t drive by his place if she lived there alone, or worse, with someone else. And if she stayed in Nashville and sold the house to someone else, would he ever forgive her?
They finished their workout and returned their weights to the rack. Grayson took a long swig from his water bottle. “You know what? Forget what I said. You wouldn’t appreciate her if it was easy.”
“True. But honestly, easy would be nice after everything we’ve been through.”
• • •
Macy sat at her gleaming ebony baby grand piano, playing with a new melody and singing softly to herself. After the meeting with the Musical Chairs producer, she and Karen had had a long talk over coffee. If Macy wanted, she could record a new album and tour to support it. Going on the road without Tori was almost unimaginable, but something inside her had burst, making it even more unimaginable to never perform again. Tori would never have wanted her to abandon her career and love of music.
She’d left Sweet Ridge with the promise that she’d think long and hard about whether she was serious about making a commitment to Gavin. He’d been rightfully skeptical about her sincerity, given this extreme swing in her feelings, but she knew in her heart that she could love him. Everything she’d always admired about him was still there, now lit on fire by the way he made her feel. But how could it work? It was clear she wouldn’t be content to leave music behind altogether. Gavin had opened up more than her heart—he’d opened up possibilities.
The phone rang, skipping across her slate coffee table from the vibration. She leaned over and grabbed the phone.
“Hi, Macy. It’s Kelly.”
“Hey, Kelly.” She sounded tense, and Macy
knew Kelly wouldn’t suddenly feel comfortable enough to call her old friend for a casual chat.
“I’ve got bad news. Mr. Procter passed away this morning.” Kelly took a deep breath on the other end of the line. “His daughter came by the shop to let me know, and she asked me to pass the news along to you. The funeral is on Tuesday, if you’re interested in coming back for it.”
“Oh no. That’s awful.” She slumped over the keyboard, resting her head against some sheet music. Mr. Procter had been out of her life for so long, but his death sucked the air out of her nonetheless.
“I think we all expected him to get better. The whole town is in shock. I’m sure everyone will understand if you don’t make it back for the service, though, and nobody would say a word about it. It’s a lot to fly back and forth again so soon.”
A heavy weight descended on Macy. She hadn’t been back to Sweet Ridge in years, hadn’t thought about the people or places, hadn’t wondered even once whether the high school ever got the new stadium built or if the Founders’ Day parade was still led by the oldest living citizen every year. Yet losing Mr. Procter was as painful as it would’ve been right after high school. Sweet Ridge had somehow woven its way back into her heart, inextricably linking her to the people she loved most in the world. Of course she’d go back to pay her respects. And not even that was enough to show her gratitude to him.
“I’ll be there.” She’d suffered through enough regrets over the things she didn’t do for the people she’d lost and loved. She couldn’t miss the chance to say good-bye to her mentor.
She got the funeral information from Kelly and hung up. She could put off making her final decision about whether to pass on the new show until after she returned, but going back to Sweet Ridge meant that she couldn’t put off her decision about Gavin. In her heart, she knew her answer, though.
Sweet Texas Kiss (Sweet Texas Secrets) Page 14
