“Don’t sweat it,” Brenna told her. “I have an anti-big-head clause in my contract.”
Mia shook her head. “I’m not sure that’s going to be enough.”
Brenna smiled because Mia was trying to be funny, and if she could convince her sisters that everything was fine, maybe they’d stop hovering around her.
They were trying to be kind. She understood they were concerned about her and wanted to help. But there wasn’t anything for them to do just now. She alone could endure and recover. In time she wouldn’t hurt so much.
Francesca finished beading the piece of lace and set it on the coffee table in front of her. “Look at the bright side, Mia. If Brenna gets out of hand, we can always threaten to take over those ocean-front four acres where she’s growing her precious Pinot grapes. Imagine the views we’d have from our front windows.”
“Not in this lifetime,” Brenna growled.
Katie grinned. “Good idea. I’ll talk to Grandpa about it,” she said in a mock whisper.
Kelly glanced at Francesca’s watch. “It’s been fifteen minutes,” she said. “The cookies should be cool enough to frost. May I be excused?”
“Of course.” Francesca smiled at Kelly. “While beading lace can be pretty exciting, I know it doesn’t compare with icing cookies. Why don’t you bring us a plate of them when you’re finished.”
“Okay.”
Kelly stood and dropped her piece of lace onto the loveseat, then raced into the kitchen.
Francesca glanced toward the kitchen, then back at Brenna. She lowered her voice.
“How are you doing?”
“Fine.” Brenna forced a smile. “You don’t have to worry about me. I’m going to be okay. I have the winery and my family. I feel very loved and supported.” She glanced at her sisters and saw none of them looked convinced. She made an X over her heart. “I swear.”
“I should get in touch with Joe,” Mia grumbled. “He’d know what to do.”
Francesca shook her head. “Joe can’t help with the real problem.”
She exchanged a look with Katie that told Brenna the two of them had been talking about her.
Brenna sighed. “Okay. Out with it.”
Katie shrugged at Francesca. Brenna’s twin sighed.
“We know you’re still in love with him.”
Brenna didn’t consider that a news flash. “So?”
“So what happens now?”
“As far as I can tell, nothing happens. I keep moving forward. I work, I plan, I recover.”
“Do you want him back?”
Trust Francesca to cut to the heart of the matter. Did she want Nic back in her life? “Yes,” she said, then sighed. “How sick is that? The man betrayed me in the worst way possible, and I still want to be with him.”
“You’re not going to, though, are you?” Mia asked. “I mean he was so awful. Trying to buy the winery like that and using you. You’ve got to be mad at him.”
Brenna nodded. “Furious.”
Francesca looked at Mia. “It’s not that simple. Loving someone can be a complicated, multilayered situation. You hate the act, but still love the man.”
“I’ll get over it,” Brenna promised, then hoped she wasn’t lying.
“You don’t have to help with the dresses,” Katie said. “Not if it’s uncomfortable.”
“Hey, I’m still a member of this family,” Brenna reminded her. “I want to work on the dresses. I want you both to be wildly happy with the men you’re going to marry. I’m thrilled for you both, and I can’t wait to dance at your wedding. I just need a little time.”
None of her sisters looked convinced, but they dropped the subject. Mia talked about the classes she would be taking when school started the following week, and Katie told funny stories about an office party she’d catered. Brenna listened and nodded, laughing where she was supposed to and adding a comment now and then. She thought she did a pretty good imitation of someone getting by. Her goal was to never let them know how much she hurt inside. Forgetting Jeff had been a snap, which went to show how little she’d cared about her ex-husband. She knew loving Nic was a slick road to hell, but she couldn’t figure out how to make the feelings go away.
Give it time, she told herself. Time and wisdom and possibly an ocean of tears.
By early October the vines were ready for their winter rest. Brenna and her grandfather strolled through the rows of plants. A bright afternoon sun warmed the temperature into the low seventies, but as always, Brenna felt cold. She didn’t sleep much these days and food didn’t appeal to her. The previous night she’d actually not been in the mood for dinner. If she kept this up for long, she would be able to give Francesca a run for her money as the skinny sister.
“I tasted your Pinot yesterday,” her grandfather said. “Still too soon to tell, but I think maybe you were right about that land.”
Brenna pressed a hand to her chest. “Careful, Grandpa. Too many shocks like that and my heart will fail.”
He ignored her. “I think maybe we find another few acres right on the coast and plant some more. With the fog to keep the vines cool and salt air to add that touch of magic, we could create something very special.”
She turned and stared at him. “You want to buy land? Non-Marcelli acreage and put our name on the grapes?”
His gaze narrowed. “You never showed me the proper respect as a girl. As a woman, you’re no better at it.”
“Probably not, but that’s so beside the point. Wow. I don’t know what to think. Last week you let me make the final choice on the Chardonnay labels. So maybe next year I can use more of the premium Chardonnay for my white-wine blend?”
“You want it all,” he grumbled.
“What’s the point in wanting only half of it?”
The old man grinned proudly. “That’s my girl.”
Brenna chuckled. She and her grandfather still argued, but not as much as they once had. Now he listened to her opinions. In return, she was more open to the values of the old ways. While a part of her resented that he’d felt the need to test her, most of her understood his somewhat twisted reasoning. He was a traditional man. Leaving a woman in charge was a big step for him.
He pulled a book out of his jacket pocket and tapped the cover. “I’ve been reading this.”
Brenna recognized Sophia’s diary. Mia had brought it back with them when they’d gone to talk to their grandfather.
Seeing the old, battered cover made her think of Nic, but it took so little to bring him to mind.
“Mia already told you what Sophia wrote,” she said.
“I wanted to see the truth for myself.” He put the diary back in his pocket. “Who is to say which wrong is less hurtful? Antonio loved his best friend’s wife. A sin perhaps, but the greater sin was acting on that love. Sophia was not faithful to her husband. Salvatore insisted on her naming the man who betrayed him, then punished them both. Friends torn apart by a night of passion and a night of revenge. Families growing up to hate each other. The past circles around us, molding us. We seek to hold the past in our hands, but it cannot be caught. Perhaps it can only be set free.”
He glanced at her. “Maybe it is time to let old grudges go.”
Brenna stared at him. “You can’t mean that.”
“Why not?”
Because her grandfather and the feud had been woven into a single entity for as long as she could remember. Because hating the Giovanni family had helped define who she was as a person. Because if loving Nic hadn’t meant defying her family, she would have married him ten years ago.
It was too little too late, she thought sadly. She’d been given control of the winery, been told the feud should end, and now neither could ease the ache inside her heart.
She started to head back to the house, only to realize she didn’t recognize where they were. At some point in their walk, they’d left Marcelli land and walked onto Wild Sea property.
“The fence is gone,” she said. “All of it.”
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She turned in a slow circle, searching for the thick posts and lengths of wire, but they had disappeared.
“Nicholas came to see me.”
Her grandfather spoke matter-of-factly. As if a visit by Nic was no big deal.
Brenna gaped at him. “He what?”
“Came to see me. We talked.” The old man shrugged. “About the past, and the future. How anger and revenge destroyed so much. He wanted to apologize for his great-grandfather. To make up for what went before.”
Nic had visited her grandfather? When? Why hadn’t anyone told her?
“He gave me this to give to you.”
Her grandfather held out a piece of paper. Brenna took it and tried to read it, but the words blurred together. Her chest ached and her stomach felt as if it were test-driving a new roller coaster.
“I don’t…” She gave back the paper.
Her grandfather smiled. “The land, Brenna. He’s deeded you all the land where Salvatore had grafted in the European vines. He couldn’t give you back what his grandfather had killed, so he’s giving you what he has. Not to me. Not to the Marcelli family. Just to you.”
She didn’t know what to think, she couldn’t think. It was too much. It didn’t make sense. Terror and hope and confusion swirled together in her mind. Then suddenly she saw a silhouette in the distance. She was too far away to see his features, but she knew him.
Her grandfather gave her a gentle push on the back. “So go listen. You like what he says, then fine. You don’t like, we get your brother to flatten him.”
Brenna didn’t think it was possible to move, but suddenly she found herself walking. Nic hurried toward her from across the field. In less time than she would have thought, they were standing in front of each other.
He looked awful. Dark shadows stained the skin under his eyes, and his face was gaunt. For the first time in her life she saw uncertainty in his eyes. Uncertainty and pain.
She understood both feelings. She was delighted to be close to him and terrified of being involved in another emotional hit-and-run. She loved him. She despised him. She wanted to throw him in the grape crusher and grind his bones to dust.
“I had this great speech I’ve been working on,” he said. “It was all logical and detailed. I explained why everything happened the way it did.”
“In it did you remember to call yourself a lying weasel dog?”
“No. I settled on a shit-for-brains bastard.”
“Close enough.”
“You hate me.” He sounded resigned.
“Are you surprised?”
“I’d sort of hoped…” He shrugged. “Maggie warned me that some acts are unforgivable.”
“She’s right. You used me, Nic. You took advantage of my dreams. You let me think you believed in me, when all the while you were looking for angles. You weren’t ever going to give me a chance to make Four Sisters a success. You led me on, and when the timing was right, you were going to rip it all out from under me.”
She glared at him. “You know what’s the worst of it? All the time you were planning to destroy my life, I was falling for you. I trusted you with my future and my heart, and you tried to screw with them both.”
She turned to walk away, but he grabbed her arm and held her in place.
“You’re right,” he said loudly. “I did all that. You waltzed into my office, wanting a loan, and I saw it as a golden opportunity. I didn’t plan to use you, but when I got the chance, I took it. I gave you the money to get leverage with your grandfather and because I never thought you’d make Four Sisters work. I figured you’d fall on your ass.”
“What? You didn’t think I could do it?” Now he’d not only hurt her, he’d insulted her.
“Hell, no. You’d been away from the business for years. I gave you six months.” He narrowed his gaze. “But I was wrong. About all of it. I’d forgotten how good you were and how hard you were willing to work. I saw you there night after night, and I realized you had the guts and the skill to do it. You earned my respect.”
“Big fat hairy deal.” She ground her teeth together.
“You think I care about your respect?”
“Yes, I do.”
“I don’t.”
“You’re lying.”
She jerked her arm free. Damn him, she did care. Despite everything, Nic’s opinion mattered.
“So what?” She glared at him. “You respected me, but you still lied to me and made love with me knowing all the time you were trying to destroy everything that made my family special.”
She waited for Nic to yell something back at her, but instead he looked away.
“I told myself I wanted to be the biggest and the best, but it wasn’t about that at all,” he said quietly. “I wanted to be a part of what you had with them. If I couldn’t get it any other way, I would buy it. Maybe a little of it was to punish you for what you’d done.”
He turned back to her. “I offered you all I had, and it wasn’t enough. I wasn’t enough.”
Brenna’s anger crumbled. “It was never about you. It was about me. I was too afraid to follow my heart.”
“I get that now, but back then…” He shrugged. “I was a kid.”
“We both were.”
He reached up and touched the backs of his fingers to her cheek. The warm contact made her shiver.
“I’m not a kid anymore and there’s no excuse for what I’ve done,” he said. “I was wrong. If I wanted to buy the winery, I should have been up front about it. As for loaning you the money-you’re right. I took advantage of your dreams, and that’s the lowest thing I’ve ever done. I’m not proud of the man I’ve been.”
He dropped his hand. “I don’t blame you for hating me. I tell myself at least that’s better than you not caring at all.”
“Why did you give me the land?”
“Because it’s the right thing to do.” His dark eyes flashed with pain. “Because I love you and I don’t know how else to tell you I’m sorry.” He pulled a leaf off a nearby plant and pressed it into her palm. “Because we’ve always had this in common. Maybe, with time, it can mend what’s been broken.”
Brenna realized that Nic was just as stupid as every other man on the planet. In the middle of the most life-changing conversation they were ever likely to have, he’d given her a leaf?
“You want to pass that middle part by me again?” she said.
He frowned as he tried to remember. “I love you.”
“And?”
His expression turned cautious. “And I’m sorry?”
“Sorry? I put myself on the line for you, Nic. I threw my heart at your feet, and you trampled over it. An ‘I’m sorry’ and a leaf aren’t going to cut it.”
He swallowed hard. “Brenna, when you told me you loved me, it was the best and worst moment of my life. I wanted to be with you more than I wanted my next breath, but I knew what I’d done was going to destroy us. You talk about going back in time and changing your answer to my proposal. If I could go back, I wouldn’t listen when you said no. Even then I knew it was your fear talking. But I was young and proud and you’d hurt me. Given the chance to do it over, I would tell you that your fears weren’t bigger than both of us. I would stand in the back of the church where you were marrying Jeff and tell the world you loved me and that I loved you.”
He took her hands in his. “If I could change time, even go back just a few months, I would still offer you that loan. But this time I would do it because I wanted you to have your heart’s desire. I would spend every moment I could with you, convincing you that the magic was still there. I love you. I’ve loved you since the first moment I saw you sneaking tastes from that damn barrel.”
She’d been hoping for a heartfelt confession. She hadn’t expected him to sweep her off her feet and set her soul free.
“Your whole family hates me,” he said. “You hate me. But I’m hoping you still love me, too. I want to win you back. I’ll do whatever it takes to prove to you that
we belong together. I want to marry you, have babies with you, and grow old with you. I want to talk about the old days until our grandchildren know the stories by heart. I want to make wine with you, make love with you, cherish you, and be the one safe haven you can always depend on. Just give me a chance. Please.”
No man had ever groveled to her before. Nic was unlikely to do it much in the future, so Brenna did her best to memorize everything about this moment so she could remember it later, when he was making her crazy. She knew that he would. They were both stubborn and creative and passionate about what they did. Clashes were inevitable. But there was no one else she wanted to disagree with, or hold long into the night. Or love.
She leaned forward and brushed her lips against his.
“How many babies?” she asked.
He grinned, then the grin turned into laughter. He swept her up in his arms and spun her around. “As many as you want.”
“If I marry you, I want some say in how you run Wild Sea. It’s way too mechanized. You need to start hand-picking more. And your barrel choices are really…”
He silenced her with a kiss. A deep, hungry, passionate kiss that spoke of too much time apart, of pain and missed chances. Tears filled her eyes, and she knew she wept for them both.
“I love you, Nic,” she whispered. “I always have.”
His dark gaze met hers and he smiled. “I love you, too.”
She rested her hands on his shoulders. “You know, I don’t think my parents have sent out the invitations for Katie’s and Francesca’s wedding yet. We still have time to make it a triple ceremony.”
“You think that’s a good idea? Won’t your grandfather glower at me through the whole ceremony?”
“Nope. He told me it’s time for the feud to be over.” She smiled.
“If it’s what you want, then I say go for it.”
She grinned. “My mother is going to absolutely have a fit.”
“Because of logistics, or because you’re marrying me?”
“Oh, the trauma of more guests, more food, that sort of thing. But don’t worry about it. With Katie helping her, the whole event will be organized with military-like precision. Oh, speaking of which, we’re going to have to call Joe and tell him he won’t be beating you up anytime soon.”
Seductive One Page 27
