by Mary Manners
“What? No!” Tyler paused long enough to rake a hand through his hair. “It—all this—just…makes me nervous.”
“Yeah, I know.” Logan stood, stretched kinks from his back. “Anyone up for a cup of coffee? Tyler and I will go after rations.”
“Wait.” Brent stood, too. “I’ll tag along, help carry the load.”
“In that case”—Grace grinned and searched through her purse for her cell phone— “bring me back a cup, and don’t skimp on the size. I’ll check in at home, make sure the sitter’s OK.”
“I’ll check in on the home front, too.” Kate reached into the pocket of her khakis and drew out her phone, flipped it open. “Bring me a jumbo-sized cup that’s fully loaded, Logan, with extra sugar.”
“Will do.” He bent to kiss her cheek and run his hand through her waves of cinnamon hair. “Coming right up.”
“How about you, Mattie?” Tyler asked as he took a step towards her and squeezed her shoulder gently. Though he tried to avoid looking, he was drawn to Cole’s cherubic face. The baby’s tiny mouth puckered and suckled, as if searching for nourishment. Tyler wondered, for a fleeting moment, what, if anything, babies dreamed about. He tore his gaze away and let his hand slip to stroke Mattie’s hair. “Would you like something?”
“I’m in. But make it decaf. All this excitement has me jittery.” She placed a kiss on Cole’s forehead then passed him to Grace. “I don’t think I’ll sleep a wink tonight.”
“I should be exhausted.” Tessa sighed as she settled back against plump pillows. “But I feel wide awake.” She stroked the baby’s damp crown while Grace cooed to him. “It’s a miracle, isn’t it…a precious baby?”
“Of course it is. And you remember that, Tess, when he wakes you up at three in the morning, wailing to be fed.” Grace cautioned, with the wisdom of one who knew the sacrifice in this.
“I will,” Tessa murmured, her honey eyes bright. “Believe me, I will.”
Their voices, punctuated by bursts of tinkling laughter, followed Tyler down the hall. He fought the urge to bolt as he, Colin, and Brent rode the elevator to the first floor. A quick glance at his watch told him it was well past midnight. Good thing Mrs. Smelcer didn’t mind staying with Jessie longer than she’d intended.
“You OK?” Brent slapped him on the back as they strode down the quiet hallway toward the cafeteria. The hum of a polishing machine punctuated the silence as a maintenance worker cleaned the foyer’s tile to a mirror-like shine.
“Uh huh.” Tyler kept his head down as he picked up the pace.
“Off to a race?” Logan quipped.
“What? Oh.” Tyler slowed a bit, stuffed his hands into the pockets of his jeans and hunched his back. “Sorry.”
“It’s OK.” Colin fell in step beside Tyler and gave him a sidelong glance. “I was nervous, too, when Tess went into labor, because I heard about…your wife and son.”
Tyler’s throat tightened. He didn’t want to think about it, didn’t want to remember. But the memory was all around him, in the pink and blue balloons that lined the maternity ward hallway and the pastel-colored stuffed lambs and bears nestled in the window display along the gift shop. “What did you hear?”
“That you lost…everything that night,” Colin dipped his head. “And everyone but your daughter.”
“That’s right.” Tyler’s voice was gruffer than he meant it to be. “It was nothing like…tonight. No laughter, no passing a baby around to ooh and ahh over him.”
“I’m sorry.”
“Well, don’t be.” Tyler snapped as Brent and Logan looked on. “You have no reason to be. What happened wasn’t your fault. It wasn’t anyone’s fault. It just…was.”
Brent placed a hand on his shoulder. “Life throws curve balls, sometimes.”
“That’s what you’d call it…a curve ball?”
“I don’t mean to diminish it.” Brent sighed. “Wow, open mouth and insert foot. I’m just making things worse.”
“Forget it. No harm done.” Tyler slapped his palms across the thighs of his jeans. “It’s just…she wants a child.”
“Who…Mattie?”
“Uh-huh.” Tyler paused to lean back against the wall as they approached the cafeteria. He crossed his arms tight over his chest and sighed. His gut twisted and roiled, and the thought of coffee—of anything on his stomach—nauseated him. “You guys go on. I’ll wait here. I need to catch my breath a minute.”
“No way.” Brent fell in beside him at the wall. “We’re not in a hurry.”
“That’s right.” Logan and Colin each found a place of their own. “Leave no man behind. We four need to stick together.”
The clatter of silverware against hard plastic serving trays resonated through the doorway. The sign at the entrance told him the late-night service had just begun.
Tyler drew several deep breaths before he spoke again. “I love Mattie, but I don’t know if I can risk giving her what she wants—what she needs. So I guess we’re…done.”
“Just like that?” Logan snapped his fingers.
Tyler gazed vacantly down the hall. Suddenly he felt bone-tired. “What else is there?”
“Well, you’d better figure it out, my friend, before you’re in too deep, and you break her heart,” Brent advised. “I don’t have to tell you, Tyler, that Mattie’s had her share of heartache. You sure don’t have the market on that, you know.”
9
“Wow, business has really picked up since the weather turned warmer.” Grace gushed as she filled the Sweet Treats display case with generous slices of gold cake. “I can hardly bake fast enough.”
“I know. It’s the same with my meltaways.” Mattie turned her attention to the boulevard beyond the bakery’s expansive front window. Weeping willows lined the street, their graceful limbs bursting with delicate white blooms that danced in a gentle breeze. The town square boasted a crowd, and water shimmered from the pond at its center like a collection of brilliant jewels. Winter morphed into spring; ice had long since melted, the skating rink closed for another year, and she hadn’t seen Jessie in several days. Word was that Tyler had signed her up for skating lessons at the Ice Chalet in Knoxville.
Mattie couldn’t know for sure, though, since Tyler hadn’t stopped into Sweet Treats for a morning cup of coffee or a taste of her meltaways since the doors reopened last week. He’d made an art of keeping his distance, and she refused to call him. She had her pride, after all. And she’d weathered worse storms than losing the man she loved.
At least that’s what she kept telling herself as she restocked foam coffee cups beside the coffeemaker and sprinkled cinnamon topping over moist blueberry muffins, then moved on to check the sugar and creamer dispensers for the fifth time that morning. She struggled to keep her hands busy and her thoughts focused. No point in dwelling on the past…or on a future filled with broken dreams and what-if’s.
“Tessa just sent me a text.” Kate rushed through the kitchen door, toting a platter piled high with chocolate-cherry kisses. “She’s going to stop by with Cole in a bit, when he wakes from his nap.”
“He’s three weeks old today.” Grace sighed. “Can you believe it, Mattie?”
Three weeks since she’d shared in the joy of her nephew’s birth—and the heartbreak of losing Tyler. It felt like an eternity.
“I’m going up to the stock room to check our supplies. We’ll need to place an order for more fondant soon, and most likely several other things.” Mattie tugged at her apron and pulled the collar of her blouse from her flushed neck. Suddenly the room sweltered and swayed, and she reached for a menu from the counter to fan herself as she climbed the stairs. “Call me when Tess arrives.”
****
“Daddy, the scrapbook is full,” Jessie said as she flipped to the final page of the album. “Can we buy a new one? I still have more pictures.”
“Sure.” Tyler stroked her soft cinnamon curls. “We’ll look for one the next time we go shopping.”
“D
o you remember this?” Jess flipped back to the beginning of the book and tapped a photo of the snowman they’d made together. “It’s Sebastian.”
“Yes, it is.” Tyler laughed, remembering the walnut eyes and colorful jellybean mouth, and the way Jess had insisted he could talk. “We sure got a bushel of snow that time, didn’t we?”
“Yes, Daddy.” She turned the page, and her merry giggles filled the room. “Oh, look at the pond…and there’s Mattie. Remember when we went skating on my birthday? Boy, that was so much fun!”
“How could I forget?”
“She made me such a pretty cake, Daddy, with all those smiley faces. And I made a special wish.”
“Care to share it?”
“Uh-uh.” Jessie shook her head, her soft brown eyes solemn. “I can’t, Daddy. I’m still waiting.”
“For what?”
“For it to come true, silly.”
“Oh. Well, will you let me know when it does?”
“’Course, I will.” She nodded. “I miss Mattie so much. Do you think she can go skating with us again…at the Ice Chalet? I’d like to show her what I can do.”
“I don’t know, honey.” Tyler skimmed a finger over the photo of Mattie on the ice—her cheeks pinked by the cold air, a contagious smile on her lips—before looking away. “She’s awfully busy, now that Sweet Treats has reopened.”
“But it was open before, and she wasn’t too busy, then.”
“That was…different.”
“Why, Daddy?” Jessie gazed up at him. “Why was it different?”
“It just was.” He struggled to hold his voice steady. He didn’t want to take his disappointment out on Jessie.
Tyler cringed at the way he’d turned from Mattie the night Tessa had given birth…fled from the love he and Mattie shared. He’d never run from anything in his life, no matter how difficult, yet the events of that night conjured a flood of doubts that tore at him. No doubt about Mattie—no, he loved her, and she clearly loved him, as well. But the fear of losing her…it tore him up inside.
Tyler shook his head, grimacing. How ironic that his fear caused him to lose Mattie, anyway. Why couldn’t he just let it go, trust God? He hadn’t spoken to Mattie in a couple of weeks, and there was so much left unsaid. Yet it seemed they were two trains traveling different tracks, destined to never cross paths. The thought turned Tyler’s gut inside out.
“I know what we can do!” Jessie clapped her hands, and then scrambled from the chair. “I’ll be right back, Daddy.”
He waited, sipping lukewarm coffee left from their dinner as Jessie pattered from the kitchen. A rustle of activity commenced in the living room, and then she returned a few moments later toting several sheets of blank copy paper in one hand and her art box in the other.
She plopped the supplies onto the table and climbed back into her chair. “I’ll make Mattie a picture, and we can take it to her on the way home from school tomorrow.”
“I don’t think so. No drawings, now.” Tyler took the memory book, closed it, and then gathered Jessie’s art supplies. “It’s time for your bath.”
“But it’s not even seven o’clock yet, and I want to make Mattie a picture, Daddy!” Jessie cried. “Oh. Please, Daddy!”
Tyler glanced at the clock on the microwave. “When did you learn to tell time?”
“Mrs. Skylar teached me.”
“Taught you. Mrs. Skylar taught you.”
“Yeah, Daddy, and I want to make a picture.” She took the supply caddy back and spilled a rainbow of crayons onto the table. “Do you want to help me?”
He sighed, scratched his head, and couldn’t help but grin. “Tell you what…I’ll finish the dishes while you draw your picture. Then it’s bath time.”
“Yes sir, Daddy.” Jessie picked up a pencil and gnawed her lower lip as she began to sketch. “Mattie’s gonna love this. I just know it.”
“I’m sure she will, honey,” he agreed, though he wasn’t sure at all.
10
The bell above the Sweet Treats entrance jangled, and Mattie glanced up to see Jessie skip through the door.
“Hi, Mattie.”
“Oh, Jessie.” Mattie dropped the order pad she was skimming through and raced around the counter to wrap the child in a tight embrace. “What a wonderful surprise. It’s so good to see you!”
“I’ve missed you, Mattie.”
“Oh, I’ve missed you, too, sweetie.” She pressed her cheek to Jessie’s hair, breathed in the light, fragrant scent of apples mixed with dank earth from the school playground. “It’s been so long.”
“I have something for you.” Jessie wiggled away as the entrance door slipped closed, muffling the sound of traffic along the boulevard.
“You do?”
“Uh-huh.” Jessie reached into the pocket of her windbreaker and drew out a slip of folded paper. “It’s special delivery, too.”
“How very nice of you to think of me.” Mattie took the paper and unfolded it carefully. Inside she found a colorful sketch of her and Jessie, skating with Tyler at the Ice Chalet. Jessie wore the skates and the outfit Mattie had given her. All three smiled broadly, and Mattie’s breath caught.
“It’s lovely.” Mattie swallowed hard and glanced up as the bell jangled a second time. Tyler loped through the door, breathless.
“Jessie,” he scolded in a stern voice. “You’re not supposed to run from me.”
“Sorry, Daddy, but I just had to see Mattie, and we’d already crossed the street, so it wasn’t dangerous.”
“Well…” Tyler glanced up and his gaze locked with Mattie’s. He shifted feet, raked a hand through his wind-blown hair. “Hi, Mat.”
“Hi, Tyler.” She smiled slightly as her heart threatened to pulse right out of her chest. His familiar scent mingled with vanilla and chocolate, filling her with longing. A smattering of stubble shadowed his chin, and his eyes were dark and restless. “How have you been?”
“Um…OK, I guess.” He took Jessie’s jacket as she wiggled out of it. “And you?”
“Managing. We’ve been awfully busy since we reopened. I can hardly keep up with all the orders.”
“So I’ve heard.” He scanned the room, nodding appreciatively at the wrought-iron tables decorated with sprigs of colorful spring blooms. The fully-stocked display case featured an overflowing variety of mouth-watering pastries and sweets. “Looks good in here, Mat. Smells even better.”
“Thanks.” The gurgle of the coffeemaker told her the rich hazelnut blend had finished brewing. “Would you like a cup of coffee?”
“No, thanks.” He shook his head. “We can’t stay. Jess has...homework.”
“Not too much, Daddy. Just a story to read, and a little bit of adding. I can do it later, after my bath.” Jessie gazed into the display case and pointed to the platter of meltaways. “Can I have one of those, Mattie?”
“Of course you may.” Mattie opened the case and arranged a few on a dessert plate. “Would you like some cold milk with that?”
“Uh-huh.” Jessie took the plate and sniffed the delicate chocolates. “Mmm, they sure smell good.”
“Well, I’ve been told they taste good, too.”
Jessie slipped into a chair at one of the tables. “Daddy bought me a new scrapbook, ’cause my old one got all filled up. Do you wanna see it, Mattie?”
“Sure, I do.”
“I have some pictures in my backpack. Maybe you can help me put them in the scrapbook.”
“I’d like that.” Mattie scooted into a chair beside her. “Let’s see what you’ve got.”
“Help me, Daddy.” Jessie reached for the backpack she’d dropped on the floor, and Tyler handed it to her. “The pictures are in my folder, ’cause I took them for show an’ tell.”
Tyler waited as she unzipped the pack and found the photos tucked among a reading book and math worksheets. “Careful, don’t tear them.”
“You sure you don’t want that coffee?” Mattie murmured to him as he took a seat at t
he table, as well. “I just brewed a fresh pot.”
“Maybe I’d better,” he conceded. “This may take a while.”
****
Tyler tried to keep his focus on the task at hand, but it was more than difficult as Mattie’s arm brushed against his while she positioned a collage of photos on the page for Jessie.
“That’s just perfect, Mattie.” Jessie’s voice tinkled merrily across the table, and Tyler wondered how he’d gotten roped into this—filling the scrapbook when he hadn’t even wanted to stop into the bakery in the first place.
The scent of Mattie’s perfume, coupled with her easy smile and lilting voice was killing him—slowly and painfully. He wondered how he ever let his fears overpower his love for her. Now the memory seemed so muddled…almost like a dream. Photos of Cole were tacked to a bulletin board on the wall behind the cash register, and Tessa flashed a radiant smile as she held him bundled in her arms. The two were fine…no worries at all.
Tyler drained his coffee cup and stood to stretch his legs. “It’s getting late, Jess. We should let Mattie get back to work. I’m sure she’s got a lot to do.”
“But we’re not finished yet, Daddy.”
“You can finish tomorrow.” He narrowed his gaze and tossed his coffee cup into the trashcan. “Pack up.”
“So we can come back tomorrow?”
“I didn’t say that.”
“Yes you did, Daddy. You said we can finish tomorrow.”
“I meant—”
“I’ll help you pack up,” Mattie offered, gathering the photos that lay scattered across the table. “Don’t keep your daddy waiting.”
“Oh, OK.” Jessie wiggled her arms into the sleeves of her windbreaker as Mattie slipped the scrapbook into her backpack. “Thanks for helpin’ me, Mattie.”
“You’re welcome.”
Jessie threw her arms around Mattie’s shoulders and squeezed her tight, patting her back with a tiny palm. Tyler turned away, unable to watch. He cleared his throat.
“Thanks for the coffee, Mattie. Jess, I’ll meet you outside. Don’t dawdle, OK?”
