I cant see a thing. Apart from the ducks!
Patience, patience . . . He continued to squat, balancing the girl with one hand while pointing out to the bushes. Then there was movement and he whispered, See it? the bush shaking . . .
Where?
At the edge, just keep watching.
I cant see anything. Eh Kirsty? can you? Can you see anything?
The girl made no response, but she gazed in the direction of the island.
Definitely rats there, said Tammas.
At that moment about half a dozen birds flew down to settle on the pond.
Tammas said, Should’ve brought some bread with us Vi, the wee lassie would’ve liked to feed them. And the ducks as well right enough. Hey . . . Look . . . Now, the bushes.
Vi moved closer to him, her gaze going with the direction he was pointing in. She shook her head.
O Christ, he said, Vi – you cant miss it! Biggest I’ve seen for years! Big grey yin! See it? Look! Kirsty, Kirsty, can you see it? Can you see it? the big rat? O Christ, a beauty.
I cant see a thing . . .
After a moment Tammas said, It’s away. He stood up, lifted the girl from the railing and returned her to Vi.
I think you were seeing things.
Naw, you kidding! You wouldnt’ve missed it either if you’d been looking properly.
What d’you mean looking properly? I was looking properly. I was looking properly for the past ten minutes and I’m bloody freezing!
Ach . . . Doesnt matter. Come on, we’ll go to the swing park – eh Kirsty? want a shot on the swings? He lifted her back from Vi again and attempted to raise her so that she could sit on his shoulders but she kicked with her feet and he had to duck and then land her on the ground.
Vi took the girl by the hand. Sometimes she’s a bit funny. And I dont think she likes being up high either.
Tammas nodded. Okay Kirsty? He winked at her, stepped round the way so that he was walking with the girl inbetween himself and Vi; and gradually he took her by the hand. When they reached the swing park he stood behind one of the swings while Vi sat the girl down on it, fixing her hands to grip onto the iron chains which were attached from the swing to the cross section above. He lighted a cigarette and gave it to Vi, lighted one for himself. This is great, he said.
She raised her eyebrows at him.
Naw, honest.
Dont be daft.
Naw, I mean it Vi; it’s the best day I’ve had for years.
She looked at him.
He smiled briefly. If you had seen the rat right enough, that would’ve topped it. He shook his head and glanced away from her, inhaled deeply and blew the smoke away over his shoulder.
Kirsty said: Mum . . . And she withdrew her hands from the chains, holding them out to Vi who lifted her off immediately.
The shute, said Tammas. Fancy it?
Vi shrugged, she was holding the girl so that her back was to him.
Think she fancies it?
Ask her and see.
Tammas walked round the back of Vi and he winked at Kirsty. Fancy a shot on the shute?
I think it’ll be too damp, said Vi, after a moment.
Mm.
No think so yourself?
He shrugged. Suppose it will be.
Vi smiled. We’ll go to the Art Gallery. She cuddled the girl and murmured. Eh Kirsty? will we go to the Art Gallery? get nice and warm!
You’d think it was cold to hear you.
Cold! God! It’s bloody December! And I dont know how you survive with just that daft jacket! Vi shook her head and she turned and walked off in the direction of the Art Gallery.
Naw, he said, hey! Hey Vi – mon we’ll go to the cafe across the road!
As long as it’s warm.
Course it’s warm. He put his arm round her waist but she twisted to settle Kirsty more comfortably in her arms, and he stepped aside, put his hands in his trouser pockets.
Tammas . . . do you mind if we just went home?
Naw. He shrugged.
D’you mind?
He looked at her. Me as well like? I mean have I to come with you?
She raised her eyebrows.
He grinned; he took her by the elbow.
I’d rather you didnt – it makes it hard for me to carry Kirsty.
Sorry.
It’s okay. There’s bacon and eggs in the house. And I can put out some chips.
He shook his head.
Is that alright?
Aye. Aye. It’s great. God, great.
During the early part of the evening, after they had eaten, Vi was washing clothes at the sink and Tammas was sitting to one side of the settee, gazing at the television. Kirsty was sound asleep, outstretched on the other side of the settee. Every so often he turned to watch Vi, smiling when she became aware of him. She placed her hands on her hips and said: I hope you’re satisfied!
Tell you something Vi, that was the best meal I’ve had in years.
O I know, bacon egg and chips – very unusual.
Aye fair enough but it was really good, I mean really.
Shut up! She turned back to the sink, immersing her hands in the washbasin, wringing an article of clothing. Tammas had got off the settee making very little noise and he came round behind her, encircled her waist with his arms, placing his chin on her right shoulder and his cheek to her cheek.
You’re putting me off.
Sorry. He moved his head round and kissed her on the mouth. Salt, he said, licking his lips.
O thanks! It’s probably yours anyhow.
He grinned, put his arms round her again, and she turned to face him. They kissed, clinging to each other. Then she broke from him: We better put the cot up . . . She nodded at Kirsty and at the space between the side of the fireplace and the bed-recess. It goes in there.
Once they had done so Vi began getting the girl ready for bed. She did it very gently and very carefully and Kirsty seemed hardly to know what was happening; and she was back sleeping again when Vi laid her inside on the cot. She pulled over the blankets and stared at her. Then she bent and kissed her on the forehead. Kirsty smiled.
Tammas shook his head at Vi as she straightened. He returned to the settee while she plugged in a table lamp, switched off the main room light. She lowered the volume of the television before sitting down next to him. He put his arm round her shoulders and she leaned her head onto his. They were gazing in the direction of the television. The adverts came on around the middle of the programme. Tammas moved his head slightly. Heh Vi, he said, what’re the scratches on wee Kirsty’s stomach?
She continued gazing at the television.
I noticed them when you were changing her for bed.
Vi shifted away from him, she reached across to the mantelpiece for her cigarettes. He got his matches and struck one before she had a cigarette in her mouth. She accepted the light from him, then lifted her Sunday newspaper from the floor, began reading the front page.
Will I turn off the telly? he asked.
She shrugged.
I’ll keep it on if you like?
She turned a page: I dont mind what you do.
He nodded and waited a moment. D’you want me to go away?
She shrugged again.
Just say the word if you do.
Do you want to go away? she asked, with her gaze still to the newspaper.
No, I want to stay here.
Then I want you to stay here as well.
He put his hand on her shoulder. She continued gazing at the newspaper.
•••
Closing the front door he began to stroll along the lobby to his own room but the kitchen door jerked open and Margaret was there. Where’ve you been? she said.
Tammas could see Robert behind her, sitting at the kitchen table. I’m sorry, he replied. Honest Margaret, I meant to get in touch with you yesterday.
So you’re back? called Robert.
Aye, I’m sorry, I meant to get in touch yesterday but eh . .
.
You forgot? called Robert.
I’m sorry Margaret.
Tammas we were really worried.
Wait a minute . . . Robert had got up from his chair and he came to stand next to Margaret. You were worried hen, no me. Eh? Just as well I never called in the polis!
We thought something serious had happened.
Tammas shook his head: I’m sorry, honest, it was a daft thing to do. He brought his cigarettes out and he lighted one quickly.
Robert pursed his lips and patted Margaret on the shoulder, and he left them to go through to the living room. Then Tammas followed his sister into the kitchen. I really am sorry, he was saying, honest Margaret.
She looked at him.
He took a wad of notes from his hip pocket and counted a sheaf, laid them on the table. That’s the rest of the money I owe you Margaret. It puts me up to date now. He laid down some more money: This makes me go two weeks in advance. Okay?
She made no answer.
He had taken his jacket off and now he sat down, unlaced his shoes.
Margaret said, I see you’re wearing your watch.
My watch?
Where’ve you been?
Ach . . . I was just – nothing bad if that’s what you’re thinking.
Tammas.
Honest Margaret I wasnt doing anything bad.
Well where did you get the money then?
The money?
God Tammas I’m asking you.
Where I got the money? He inhaled deeply on the cigarette, coughed slightly. I just got a wee turn. I was owed a few bob as well. No mind I was telling you before? A guy from the factory? Owed me a lot of money.
Tammas! Margaret shook her head.
Honest.
They looked at each other. Then Margaret said, What have you been doing?
Nothing.
We’ve no seen you since Friday at tea-time.
Well I was here on Friday night.
You were here?
Aye – Friday night. I slept here, I was in my room.
Well it must’ve been late when you came in then.
Dont know.
And Saturday, and Sunday, and today – it’s nearly half past nine at night Tammas. That’s three days; three days you’ve been away.
Three? He frowned at her.
Saturday Sunday Monday. Three; one two three.
Mm.
I’m asking where you were.
Ach – I was just staying with somebody.
Who? It wasnt Rab because he was up for you yesterday afternoon and it wasnt Billy because Robert met him in the street.
Tammas nodded. What was Rab up for?
I dont know. Margaret had been standing with her arms folded; now she walked to the sink, turned the tap on then off. She came to sit at the table, facing him.
Tammas sniffed. I should’ve phoned Mrs Brady and asked her to tell you I was okay. I’m sorry, honest. The person I was with doesnt have a phone either.
Margaret looked at him. She shook her head: Tammas, I dont think you would’ve phoned even if you’d had the opportunity, because I dont think it would’ve even crossed your mind.
He stared at the edge of the table, reached to tap ash into the ashtray.
After a moment Margaret got up and left him. When the living room door shut he rose, went to his room and changed clothes. He lay on the bed. Then somebody chapped the door. It was Robert. Okay to come in? he called.
Aye.
Ta . . . Robert closed the door and he strolled to the window with his hands in his pockets. He blew a sort of whistling noise between his lips, a tune, while gazing down into the street below. He sighed. You’re getting too old for this kind of carry on. It doesnt matter to me what you get up to – it’s your sister; she’s no your mother you know.
Tammas nodded. He was sitting up on the bed now.
She took the day off work by the way.
Aw. Tch.
What d’you expect but I mean she’s been heck of a worried. Eh? Surely you could’ve at least phoned? Robert glanced round at him, shaking his head.
I’m sorry. I really am Robert I just . . . I never actually knew I wasnt coming back till too late. I didnt want to phone the auld yin up the stair in case it got her out her bed.
Robert nodded. He stared out the window again, hands in his pockets still, his shoulders rocking slightly.
Look eh Robert, could you tell Margaret, let her know and that, it was nothing bad, I mean, I’m no getting up to anything bad, if that’s what she thinks – actually I mean I think she does, I think she does think that.
Well no bloody wonder! Robert had turned back round again and he said: One minute you’re pinching ten pences out the meter-bowl and the next you’re taking taxis to the bloody broo! I mean what do you think people’s going to say? Eh?
I’m no thieving.
I know you’re no thieving. If I thought you were you’d be out the door in two seconds flat, never mind what your sister had to say about it.
Tammas sniffed.
Listen, I’m no thick; I go in for a pint to Simpson’s now and again myself. Aye! some strange places you’re running about these days – according to what I hear anyway! Gambling dens?
They’re no as bad as they’re made out to be.
Robert was gazing at him.
Honest, they’re no.
What d’you sing hymns or what! Robert shook his head then he smiled briefly.
Tammas cleared his throat. He reached for his cigarettes, glanced at his brother-in-law: I’ll be moving out shortly anyhow.
Robert nodded.
Soon as I find a place.
I’ll no force you Tammas. But maybe it’d be for the best.
Did you tell Margaret? about what you heard in Simpson’s I mean.
I did not, no, it’s no my place to tell her it’s yours.
Mm. He sniffed, struck a match and lighted the cigarette, exhaled: D’you think I should?
I dont bloody know. You’re a big boy now. She’s no daft but, she’s obviously got some idea.
Tammas nodded.
Why dont you find yourself a job?
No so easy.
I know it’s no so easy – that’s how people hang on to the ones they’ve got.
Tammas sighed.
Look I dont want to give you a lecture but that was really daft, chucking your job in.
I hated the bloody thing.
Robert shook his head. Then he muttered, Aye, probably best that you think of moving. Seriously Tammas, for your own good. Mind but, I’m no telling you to go.
Tammas nodded.
His brother-in-law had arrived by the door and he waited there with his hand on the doorknob. I wouldnt do that, he said, I wouldnt tell you to go.
I know.
Robert shrugged. Unless I lost my temper! Naw but it’s just Margaret, you know what like she is, she’s a heck of a woman for worrying and when you’re here and she doesnt know what’s happening and the rest of it . . . Well, she just starts worrying and worrying and it’s hopeless.
Okay.
•••
The taxi stopped at the side entrance but before he could open the door three wee boys rushed forward, scrambling to reach the handle. Will yous fucking stop that! yelled the driver.
While Tammas was paying the fare one of the boys was banging shut the door and he gave him some change. Split that between yous, he told them.
In the bar underneath the stand he ordered a bottle of export and he stood reading the evening’s programme in the Adviser. The 1st and 2nd races were over. Once he had chosen the likeliest winners he asked a man closeby to tell him the results.
Then he swallowed the rest of the beer and went to the other counter, ordered a hot pie and a carton of soup. Then he spotted Billy and John; they were standing by the door peering about. He shouted to them, waving them over.
What a surprise, said Billy; finding you here!
Is there something up?
&nb
sp; Billy winked: Just thought we’d come over and keep you company!
Want a pint? said John.
Eh naw, I’ll just stick with this . . . He indicated the pie, and soup carton.
You sure?
I’ve just finished one.
Okay man – what about you Billy?
Aye, a lager.
John crossed to the bar. Immediately Tammas glanced at Billy: What d’you bring him with you for? He always puts the fucking mokkers on me?
It was him had the dough! Billy grinned: Better be careful, he’s here to ask you to go to England with him.
What?
Aye.
Fuck sake! Tammas bit a mouthful of the pie.
Billy nodded. You dont fancy it then?
How do you?
I dont know. At least there’s work – Manchester he’s talking about. Supposed to be a stack of factories and industrial estates and all that.
I thought your auld man was getting you into the copper works?
Billy shrugged.
After a moment Tammas said, D’you actually fancy England?
A wee bit man, aye, I must admit.
Hh! Tammas bit another mouthful, and he sipped at the soup. Better than beer on a night like this! he said. Hey was it really his suggestion to come over?
Aye, Christ, it wouldnt be mine anyway man I’m fucking skint.
Tammas nodded, grinned. The usual!
Cheeky bastard! Billy frowned slightly and turned to glance at the bar.
Probably fucked off home cause it’s his round! Billy grinned.
A few minutes before the off for the 3rd race Tammas had left the bar and gone to the betting enclosure. Very soon after he saw Billy standing just below the row of bookmakers. And then John was there beside him. Tammas went over. He slipped a £5 note to Billy.
John was saying, Favourite looks good Tammas eh?
He nodded.
D’you fancy it yourself?
It’s got a chance.
You backing it like?
Who me?
Aye, the favourite.
Naw . . . Tammas glanced at Billy who was smiling. He added: It has got a chance but. I wouldnt chat you off it John. Ran a great race last Tuesday.
Last Tuesday?
A Chancer Page 18
