by M. R. Joseph
Oh, my letter girl. You are always a thought in my head, aren’t you?
I reach over and grab myself a beer from the mini cooler fridge and pop off the cap. I take a long, slow gulp and lean my head back and close my eyes. I even my head forward again and lower my beer, and there standing in front of me is an angel, in a white bikini, and I thank the good lord above, the lower half of my body is covered by a sea of screaming, hot bubbles. Leighton stands there, towel tucked under her arm, dark locks cascading down her shoulders, and her other hand on her hip, which is cocked out to the side a bit.
“So, how about that beer, Luca?” She speaks, and I lick my lips, and I know without a doubt, this woman is pulling me in, and I have a feeling once she has me, I’m not going anywhere. Not that I would want to… anyway.
I still can’t believe what I’m doing. I feel drunk, even though I haven’t had a beer yet. When James invited me to hang out in Luca’s hot tub and Luca agreed, I think I almost shit myself. Now here I am, getting ready to climb into a hot, bubbling cauldron of sin with none other than the man who I had loved for so long, and now he’s back in my life. I hope no one notices the way my hands are trembling. It’s not that the sun is getting ready to set and it’s a bit chillier, it’s the fact that I will be sitting in such close proximity to the one whose heart had held mine. As I climb into the tub, Luca reaches out and grabs my hand to help me. I feel the heat radiate through my body at his single, gentle touch, and I feel like I did that day in high school when he helped me up after I was knocked down. This feeling confuses me, and I am starting to wonder if what I’m thinking about how he once held my heart is still true. These are feelings I shouldn’t be feeling. I have temporarily given up on the whole idea of love. I confuse it with lust, I confuse it with sex, and It’s all just plain, old, confusion. But I can’t help it. I’m being a bit flirty with him. I ran into my new place to find the most appealing bikini I have. I brushed some bronzer on my cheeks to make them glow, and I spritz some smelly shit from Victoria’s Secret on myself. Why did I do it, I ask myself, because I’m nuts. It’s a simple analogy and I’m just going for it, for now. I gave myself a pep talk in the mirror of the bathroom before I came out here. Wes thought I was on the phone with someone. I wanted to tell my big brother that I was talking to myself and making my hormones relax before I had to go back out there and face the half-naked, wet, rocking fucking face and body of Luca Ferro. I wanted to tell him how I wanted to jump him like a grasshopper and rub my legs together to dull this freaking ache I have between them. But of course I didn’t. I mentally prepared myself to again get a glance at that body of his, perfection at it’s finest. I had always either seen him in baseball uniform, or in sweat shorts, or jeans. I hadn’t seen the sight of his bare body and when he suddenly sat up on the ledge of the hot tub, I seriously thought I’d orgasm right there, in Luca’s yard, in front of James and Grace. I imagined if I did how my eyes would roll back into my head and how I wouldn’t be able to stop touching myself and yelling, “Yes, oh, yes, Luca. YES,YES,YES!” Then I would die of mortification. I write about woman doing this to themselves without penetration. That just the sight of a man would make them come. Not me, hasn’t happened yet, and I doubt I’d let my body get to that point.
I settle into the hot tub and Luca hands me a cold beer.
“For you, my lady. It’s cold, just as you wanted it to be. Enjoy.” He raises his bottle to clank with mine, and he says, “Salute.” Obviously, cheers in Italian.
I oblige and I take a long, drink from the bottle. Luca and I are sitting in silence for a few minutes.
We begin talking at the same time.
“How long have…”
“Are you all settled…”
We both laugh. He tells me to go first.
“How long have you lived here?”
“A few years now. I love it. I love that James lives upstairs and so does Adrianna. And well, now your here. Life seems pretty sweet at the moment.”
Oh crap, he literally just winked at me, and I think my bikini bottoms are wet, but of course they’re wet, I’m in a freaking hot tub. I mean wet with arousal. That’s impossible. All he did was wink at me. I calm myself down and bite my lip.
“What were you going to ask me?”
“I was wondering if you are all settled in? Did you put your office together?”
“Oh, yes. Wes is just hanging a shower curtain in the bathroom for me and then he has to go. It looks really great in there. Thank you again, Luca, I appreciate you renting it to me.”
“The pleasure was all mine, Leighton.”
We are now thigh against thigh, he is gazing into my eyes. When he takes another drink of his beer, he is still focused on me. I take my bottle, bring it up to my lips, and finish the whole damn thing. I lick them after, and he looks as though I just sucked the air out of his lungs. I’m trembling now and he would be a fool not to notice.
“Would you like another beer?” I nod my head. He pops open the cap for me and he settles back down. His one arm is holding his beer and the other stretches towards my back. I feel like I’m on Happy Days or some shit show like that and we are at the burger place and Richie Cunningham is trying to make a move on me, but Luca is more like the Fonz. I’m in total la-la land and I need to be rescued from it.
“Hey guys. Got room for two more?”
Saved by the bell. James and Grace come down.
“Of course. We have plenty of room.” Luca answers.
“Well if there is so much room, why are you two sitting shoulder to shoulder, hmmm?”
I already see James is a smart ass. Grace hits his chest again and I notice she’s holding a bottle of tequila and a sandwich baggie of lime wedges.
“Leightybug, I have a treat for you.” Grace dangles the bottle of Tequila in front of my face as she climbs into the tub.
Tequila spells trouble and a very flirty and dirty Leighton, and I know I haven’t eaten a thing since that damn power bar I had this afternoon. If I do more than two shots, I’m royally screwed.
“So kids, what’s happening?” James asks.
“Just relaxing. Watching the sunset and enjoying the scenery.” I can feel Luca staring at me as he says this and my whole body shivers. Grace pulls the cap off the bottle of Tequila and I wonder where the shot glasses are.
“Grace, are we swigging it from the bottle, or are you hiding the glasses in your bikini top?” I ask.
“Swigging it out of the bottle my friend.” Now this is a girl who I have known practically my whole life and she knows I don’t drink a lot, but when I do and Tequila is involved, I’m quite, how would you put it, adventurous. She wants me to get into trouble and now I’m starting to think maybe her and James are in cahoots with one another as to how far this flirting thing Luca and I have going on, will go.
“Don’t be a wimp, Leightybug, Just take a sip, suck on the lime, and pass it around. No harm, no fowl.”
Yea, that’s what she thinks, and she damn well knows better. She hands me the bottle and a wedge. Luca is still staring at me as he takes a few sips of his beer. It’s damn peer pressure and I’m twenty eight years freaking old. I glance at James, and Grace, and then my gaze sets upon Luca. His chest is rising and falling fast, and I’m wondering why this appears to be affecting him. Fuck it. I take a semi-long sip from the bottle and I feel the burn of the alcohol seep down my throat. I take the lime wedge in my mouth and suck on it, the juice goes into my mouth, drips down my chin, into my cleavage, and I tilt my head back to savor the flavor of it. When I open my eyes and look up, I focus on Luca. His eyes are wide as saucers and he chugs his beer like it’s water and he’s dying of thirst in a desert.
“That was delicious. Who’s next?” I ask.
Luca reaches over takes the bottle from me, his fingers graze mine and I literally want to die from his touch. That little bit, just the tiniest of touches make my body dance.
Luca takes a sip from the bottle and I see his lips surround the top
of it and then I’m jealous. Jealous of a bottle of Tequila because his lips are around it. I need psychiatric help. I am mentally ill, and I need a straight jacket. I don’t think I have ever seen anything sexier than this man suck the life out of a lime wedge. He’s all lips and tongue and teeth and now I’m jealous of a lime wedge. Fuck my life. He licks his fingers that are covered in juice and when he does this sinful act, his eyes are solely on me.
“So, our ten year reunion is soon. How’s everyone feeling about that?” James asks.
“I feel fine about it. I’m looking forward to seeing people I haven’t seen in a long time.” Grace replies.
“I’m ok with it too. I see a lot of the same people because I never left here. They are all customers of mine.”
“What about you, Leighton? Do you want to see anyone that you haven’t seen since high school?”
Well now that’s a question and I need to answer it truthfully. Tequila is like truth serum, and I’m on my second shot, so here goes nothing.
“I see all I want to see, right here, right now.” I lock eyes with Luca as I say the words. He licks that damn bottom lip and I suck my lime wedge with the sucking power that the good Lord gave me. Luca studies me. My mouth, then he travels to my breasts, then to my eyes. I feel violated by his eyes, in a good way, and I’m not complaining. Luca Ferro is checking me out. Checking out my lips, my breasts, my eyes. What. The. Fuck.
Time seems to be flying as the four of us sit here and discuss things about high school. Luca and James have had some great stories that are funny about their high school days. Luca talks a little about baseball and it’s things that I had already known about. I studied his game, I know what his highs were, and what his lows were. He explains to us about when he blew out his elbow the second time. I feel terrible that he’s reliving it when he is telling us.
“I knew as soon as it happened that I was done. My career was over. I felt the pull and then the snap, and it crushed me. I think I prepared myself for it to possibly happen, I just didn’t expect it so soon I guess.” I look at Luca when he speaks and my heart breaks for him, like it did all those years ago.
“I was in a dark place after that. I didn’t eat, I drank, a lot. I left school, and wouldn’t go out.”
“I can honestly say I witnessed it. It was like pulling teeth to have him come out to have a few beers with the guys. I was worried man, really worried.”
James looks down at Grace and smiles at her after he tells Luca that he was worried.
“So what got you out of your funk, Luca?” Grace asks.
Luca draws his beer to his mouth and touches his rib cage where he has a tattoo of something written in what looks like Italian. I’m curious and I have a little liquid courage in me so I ask, “Luca, what does your tattoo translate to?”
My heart pounds as I wait for his reply. His eyes look sad, but there is something else behind them, something that is peaceful, with hope.
“It says: La ricchezza del mio cuore è infinita come il mare,
così profondo il mio amore: più te ne do, più ne ho,
perché entrambi sono infiniti.
My heart swells at the way the language rolls off his tongue. It’s sweet, passionate, poetic, and just… well sexy as hell. I turn my head a little more towards his ear and whisper what I know it means:
“My bounty is as boundless as the sea,
My love as deep;
The more I give to thee
The more I have,
For both are infinite.”
He looks deep into my eyes and I look into his. He whispers softly, “Shakespeare.” I nod my head.
“Yes.” He says quietly. “Bill got me through a lot of hard times. His words among other things.” And I know what he means. My letters. The ones where I told him I was there with him, to help him be strong, to not give up the fight. He took my words and used them. He memorized quotes I gave to him. He used them to pull himself out of his darkest hours, and a sea of emotions floods my brain.
Suddenly I feel a terrible pain shoot into my foot and I grab it.
“Ouch, ouch, ouch.” We break our gaze as I try and rub the cramp out.
“Jesus, Leighton, are you ok?” Grace asks.
“I’m fine. My foot is cramping really bad. I must be dehydrated or something. Jeez, it hurts.” In that split second Luca grabs my foot and pushes my body back slightly away from him so he can get a better angle at my foot.
“I used to get really bad cramps in my feet and legs from playing ball and running as I was training. You have to rub deep down into the muscle to relieve it. May I?” I nod my head like an idiot, again. I have no words, just head nodding.
He begins to rub it with his strong hands. A burst of electricity runs up my foot, into my leg, and right to my well, you know, and at this point I wish he’d rub between my legs like that. If I could punch myself, I would for thinking such things. My stomach clenches, my teeth chatter, and my hands shake. I stick them under the water and brace the seat below me with my palms flat. I feel my eyes roll back into my head and I let out a moan. Yes, it sounded sexual because that’s what it feels like. Not a regular foot rub when I get a pedicure, I mean it’s a panty wetting, curl your toes, fuck me sideways feeling. I realize how I sounded and I open my eyes to see Grace, James, and Luca staring at me. Grace and James look to each other and rise out of the water.
“Where are you two going?” Luca asks.
James puts his arm around Grace’s shoulder and pulls her in.
“I think it’s time me and my lady have some alone time, right Grace?” He winks at her and she winks back. Enough with the winks, already.
“I’m getting all pruney from the water anyway. Leighton, I’ll see you in the morning. We’ll have coffee, if you’re not too busy.” She smiles at me and I would seriously like to knock her lights out. She climbs out of the tub and James wraps her up in a towel. He swings his arm around her waist and they walk back up the back steps to his place.
So here we are. Luca and myself, alone, in a hot tub, wet, and he’s still rubbing the cramp out of my foot. His stare is unnerving and exciting and I feel my whole body jolt to life by his touch. He rubs my toes, one by one. Running his thumbs and middle finger over each one, languidly, it powers up my core and I feel like I may explode. His fingers are like magic and I’m fully aware that this is being done to me with a purpose. I want him to touch me, feel my body, grab me, pull me deeper under his spell. Drastic measures need to be taken. I pull my foot away gently and he looks disappointed.
“You can stop now, I think it feels ok, thank you Luca.” I sit back and look up at the sky.
“What if I don’t want to stop? What If I like making you feel good.”
Oh good Lord. Did he just say what I think he said? All of these impure thoughts and half naked man I had loved forever are making me think nasty, dirty things and I need to stop, or do I? I feel devilish and wanted, and well… all kinds of worked up.
I bite my bottom lip, turn to my side towards Luca, then gradually ease my foot in between his legs. I start to massage what is there, and it feels big, hard, and at full attention. I flex my toes in a circular motion. Around and around I go. Luca’s jaw drops and he looks at me like he wants to devour me. This is the reaction I was silently hoping for. The sky is dark, the stars are out, music seeps out of the speakers. Asia’s Heat of the Moment comes on and I’m prime to give this man the best hand, I mean foot job he has ever had. He grabs my ankle and his hands move to the rhythm of my foot. Back and forth, and back and forth. He lets out a soft moan and I increase the intensity of my movements. I hold my body back from lunging forward to take his mouth to mine. In between my legs are burning. The buildup I’m feeling eats me alive and I start to rock my hips slightly to try and dull the ache. I want him like I’ve never wanted anyone else in my life. Not even Michael. I’ve always had my fantasies of Luca, and now, it’s my reality.
“This is a really good song.” I say slowly, my voice al
most a whisper.
“Hmm.” He follows up with. His hands work their way up to my knee cap, feeling behind it, gently, methodically. It’s such an erogenous zone and I fear I may come right here, right now. He pulls my leg closer as I continue to knead his cock with my foot. I slide closer to him when he pulls me, and now we are dangerously close. I can smell the tequila and beer on his breath and it’s intoxicating. My breasts heave and I feel my nipples harden beneath my top. His hands work their way up my thighs and graze the bottom of my bikini. His thumb runs over my covered clit, and I let out another one of my infamous moans. It feels so good and I want to lose total control. His touch is torturous, stirring things inside of me, twisting and turning things in my head. Luca’s breathing is heavy and so is mine. I continue to rock my hips into his hand. My foot stills because I want more. I want to take his face in my hands and kiss him with all that I have, all I have ever wanted, always. Before I can even finish the thought in my head, his hand come around the nape of my neck and he crashes his lips to mine. His hot, wet tongue probes inside my mouth and I welcome it. The subtle licks, the gentle caress of it, the erotic sounds coming from the back of his throat, turns me animalistic. His kisses are savage and hot and I freaking love it. My hands move to his thick, dark locks and we moan into each other’s mouths. He licks my lips, then down my collarbone, and then he sucks on my earlobe and that’s all I need to then push him back and startle him for one brief second. We are panting and hungry and I am not done with him. I jump up and straddle his legs as the bubbles from the hot tub fizz around us. I find his mouth again and I push my center into the mound of hard flesh between his legs. I rock my hips and he brings his up to meet mine. It’s primal, sexy, and oh so worth the few shots of Tequila I did earlier. His hands are tangled in my hair and with every movement I feel his chest and arms stretch to empower me. I lower my head to lick his neck and bite on his ear. He tastes of lime juice and salt and I want to eat him as a meal.
“Oh, God, Leighton. If you don’t stop doing that, I can’t guarantee what will happen next.” As I continue to invade his neck with my lips, teeth, and tongue, I whisper, “Do you want me to stop?” He throws his head back and says, “Fuck, no.”
