My mouth opened and closed like a fish out of water while I searched for an answer. I had one. It just wasn’t coming out.
She leaned back in triumph. “See. It’s because you love him, and he slept with that whore and it pissed you off.”
“That’s not it!” I shouted too loud once again. “I’m still mad because he’s not who I thought he was. He’s not the stand-up guy who would never betray his friends. I was duped. And let’s not forget it was me who cleaned up the mess with Jake he left behind. Jake was destroyed.”
“And Jake is madly in love with an heiress and living a life better than any of us could fathom.” She quickly turned to Darcy. “Jake, the other hottie best friend who got screwed over, met and fell in love with... get this... Cassandra Davenport.”
“Shut the hell up!” Darcy spat. “The Cassandra Davenport? The billionaire playgirl from the gossip magazines?”
Jenna threw her hand up in an oath. “Yep. One in the same. Though it turns out she’s actually a super cool chic and they’re engaged. She lives up here with Jake now.”
“Damn. Talk about an upgrade.” Darcy nodded.
“Yep. So...” Jenna turned back to me. “Thanks to Matt and his inability to keep his dick in his pants, Jake ended up meeting the woman of his dreams and got a happily ever after. Shouldn’t you all be thanking Matt for helping Jake get rid of that tramp he’d been stuck with for like, a decade?”
Her eyebrow rose in a challenge and I clenched my teeth while I struggled for another answer.
“No. Just because it turned out okay doesn’t mean we need to throw him a parade. He’s still a backstabbing asshole.”
“A backstabbing asshole that you love.” Her lips puckered up while she made kissing noises at me.
“If you weren’t here with a client, I’d grab you by the hair and yank you over this bar.”
“Bring it, sister,” she challenged with a grin.
“Then you’re not in love with him?” Darcy asked.
I shook my head so hard my teeth rattled. “No. Of course not. I hate him.”
“It’s a thin line between love and hate. Just remember that.” Jenna pointed her finger at me, but I swatted it away.
“I’m not in love with him.”
“But you were.”
“But I’m not anymore.”
Darcy’s head twisted to keep up with our back and forth.
“Ha!” Jenna slapped the bar. “Anymore.”
“What?” I pressed my fingers into my temples.
“You said, ‘But I’m not anymore.’ Anymore implies you were at one time in love with him. Anymore implies that I was right all along.” She turned to Darcy. “I’ve always known but even as a kid she denied it until she was blue in the face.”
“Fine!” I tossed my hands up. “When we were kids, I did have a crush on him. There. Are you happy?”
“A little.” Jenna sat back and crossed her arms. “But not anymore?”
“No!” Exasperated, I slumped forward. “No. Not anymore. I realized in middle school he was never going to see me as anything but tomboy Jo. And then Nikki moved into town and he and Jake practically fell at that whore’s feet.”
Nikki moved up to Door County from Chicago our freshman year. As a small school with only fifty people in our class, the beautiful new girl had turned every guy in high school into bumbling idiots when she was around. Even the seniors had a thing for Nikki, but it was Jake who’d caught her eye.
Jenna scoffed. “Oh, I remember when she moved to school. I was a junior and that chick seriously threw off my game when she arrived. I mean, I had it going on, but fresh meat and all.”
Darcy nodded her understanding.
“So,” Jenna pressed on. “You were in love with him. You know what they say about a thin line between love and hate. And you’re sure you’re not still in love with him and that’s why you’re the only person who can’t find it in their heart to forgive him?”
“I’m sure.”
Was I? Suddenly her words struck a little too close to home. I’d questioned myself often this past year, wondering why I was the only one hanging on to my animosity with both hands. Sure, I had few good reasons to hate his guts, but I also had a list a mile long of all the incredible things he’d done for me throughout our lives. All the things that made him one of the best guys I’d ever known. The best if I was being honest. And yet, there was a hurt so deep inside me over his fling with Nikki I still couldn’t bring myself to forgive him. A hurt I realized I couldn’t identify.
“Just think about it, baby sis. There’s a reason you can’t forgive him, and I don’t think it’s the reason you think it is.” She tapped on her temple then licked the last of the salt off her margarita. “We’ve got some wedding planning to do. But you better keep me posted about how this goes down.”
“I will.”
She leaned over the bar and pulled me in for a hug. “Unless you’re in love with him, you’ll forgive him. And even if you are... forgive him anyway. Forgive him, Jo. Harboring all this anger toward him only hurts you. He’s a good guy. A great guy. He fucked up. Once. It’s time to let it go.”
After pecking me on the cheek, she pulled away and grabbed her purse, tossing a twenty on the bar.
“It was nice to meet you,” Darcy said as she stood up. “Good luck with everything.”
“Text. Me. Everything.” Jenna pointed to her phone. “I want deets. Since I have no love life of my own, I’m living vicariously through you.”
“I have no love life either, Jenna, and this isn’t going where you think it’s going.”
“We’ll see.” She winked and blew me a kiss.
After they left, I was stuck in this empty bar with nothing to do but overanalyze her observations. I mean, I’d harbored feelings for Matt over the years. Yeah, of course. How could I not? He was gorgeous, kind, funny, and the guy who was always there for me. Perfect, really. But each time those feelings reared their head I just reminded myself that he thought of me like a sister and I shoved them away.
Just friends. That’s what I always reminded myself. A mantra I recited in my mind each time he walked into a room looking too good and smiling that way that used to make my stomach do cartwheels.
But now we weren’t even that. Just friends no longer applied since he’d gone and blown up our friendship last year.
“Jo?” Maggie, the waitress called and shook me from my spiraling thoughts.
“Yeah?”
“Did you get that drink order I put through?”
“Huh?” I spun around and saw the white paper hanging out of the drink printer. “Oh, shit. I was zoned out. Sorry. Just give me a second.”
Once again, I shoved my not-so-friendly thoughts about Matt back into the pit they’d called home for over twenty-five years and I got back to work.
When I walked up the path to my cabin, I stopped when I saw the living room glowing with the colored lights of the television. It was strange to see my cabin alive in my absence. Normally I had to turn on my cellphone flashlight to find my way up the stairs when I got home. But tonight, the warm glow lit my way, and I took a deep breath before I continued my way up. With Jenna’s words, “forgive him”, ringing in my ears, I opened the door.
Matt was sprawled on the couch in a position that made my bones ache just looking at it. He was right. We needed a new couch.
“Hey, Roomster! Welcome home. How was work?” he asked, clicking the remote to mute the TV.
“Fine,” I snapped, then closed my eyes and took a deep breath.
Unless you’re in love with him, you’ll forgive him.
Determined to prove my sister wrong, I forced my lips up into an unnatural smile. “It was good. A lot easier than the past two nights. And I got cut early.”
Wide eyes met mine while he undoubtedly processed the fact I’d willingly spoken to him. And smiled. Well, kind of smiled.
“Uh, good. Great.” He tried to sit up but the bow in the couch thwarted his
attempts. “Sorry. Let me just,” he grunted, “get out of this. Jesus! I’m throwing this thing out tomorrow.”
The sight of him struggling caused a real smile to start on my lips, but I bit my lower lip and forced it away.
Petunia came out of my bedroom and rubbed up against my legs. “Hey, Petunia.” I leaned down to scratch her.
“Great. I’m stuck in the couch and that damn cat has the upper hand if she decides to attack me right now.”
The smile started again, and this time I let it rise for a full second before forcing it away.
With a grunt, Matt rolled out of the hole and landed on the floor, quickly leaping to his feet and stepping out of Petunia’s swiping range.
“Ha!” He pointed at her. “Not this time.”
The smile got the best of me and I let it grow. Even showing my teeth this time.
Matt stood staring at me, then pointed at my face. “Is that... is that a smile?”
“Don’t push it,” I grumbled and pulled it down into a frown.
“Right. Don’t push it.”
Awkward silence settled between us. Having spent our lives in easy conversation and endless laughter, it was painful to feel the tension between us. Tension that I continued to put there. Tension I was going to try to ease up on. A little.
Maybe.
“Whatcha watching?” I sat on the arm of the couch to avoid getting sucked into the endless pit.
Matt took a few cautious steps toward me and then sat on the other arm. “Uh, reruns of Family Guy.”
“I love Family Guy.”
“I remember.” He smiled; a shy smile unnatural for the guy who usually lit up the room with his grins.
“Yeah.” I shook my head. “Of course you do. We used to watch it together all the time.”
“I remember that, too.” His smile grew a little more.
The silence moved into the space between us again, and I shifted on the couch arm.
“Should I turn the volume on? You wanna watch?”
Forgive him, Jo. Just a sliver.
With a shrug, I nodded. “Sure.”
While I sat on the uncomfortable ledge, I tried to force my eyes on the screen. Tried to keep from staring at Matt like he’d sprouted three heads. Vegging out watching Family Guy was something we’d done a hundred times, but right now it felt like the most unnatural thing in the world. It’d been over a year since I’d sat in a room alone with him. Over a year since I was even in a room with him and not glaring at him or telling him to get the hell out.
Everyone else has forgiven him, Jo.
We watched the show for the better part of an hour, our quiet laughter the only conversation between us while we shifted over our uncomfortable seating arrangements.
I shifted again, grimacing as the backache I’d earned from a long day at work only amplified from my perched position.
“Are you okay?” Matt asked, and my gaze slid sideways to meet his.
When our eyes met, I quickly shifted mine back to the TV. “I’m fine. Just a little sore.”
A groan escaped his lips. “Are you as uncomfortable as me? This couch freaking sucks.”
Glancing back over, I saw his smile growing, and it softened me a little more. “Yeah. It super sucks. I’ve had it since I was nineteen and it’s long past its prime.”
Standing up, he stretched, and I couldn’t help but take notice of the abs that peeked out from beneath his t-shirt.
Just friends. No. Not even that. Not anymore.
It wasn’t the first time in my life his impressive physique had me reminding myself of our platonic relationship. And this time we weren’t even platonic. Now we weren’t really even friends, more like frenemies.
“So, at the risk of pushing it.” He dropped his arms and turned to me, the definition of his abs disappearing again. “Do you want to head up to The Garage and grab a drink? There’s a band playing tonight, and it’s really nice out.”
Biting my lip, I let Jenna’s accusations bounce around in my head.
Just forgive him, Jo.
He worked his jaw back and forth as he waited. “Unless you don’t want to. We can just sit here on this busted ass couch in pain all night.”
With a deep breath, I closed my eyes for a beat, then opened them and nodded. “Sure. Why the hell not?”
The spark that had always lived in his eyes flickered back on. “Really? You’ll come out with me?”
Shrugging, I stood up, grimacing from the pain now searing through my ass. “I could use a drink and you’re right... we need a new couch.”
“Drinks are on me.”
“Damn straight they are.” I looked up, and we exchanged a brief smile.
Forgive him, Jo.
Baby steps. Though I wasn’t ready to forget everything that went down, I was making baby steps. Teeny, tiny baby steps. And right now, those steps were taking us out for drinks.
CHAPTER SIX
MATT
Jo followed me through the crowd that had gathered outside at Husby’s Garage Bar. I tried not to overwhelm her with my excitement that she’d agreed to have a drink with me. It had taken all my willpower not to sweep her into my arms and spin her around when she’d said yes.
Take it slow.
The folk music floated up through the open-air bar, and the small crowd gathered in front of the three-piece band swayed to the sounds. The Garage Bar was just that... a garage that had been turned into a bar. Situated halfway down the steep hill heading into downtown Sister Bay, Husby’s was the busiest bar around, and what had started as a simple idea to use the empty garage to expand the space, making room for visitors to sit outside and enjoy the fresh Door County air, had taken on a life of its own. Now the garage had been transformed into a charming wrap around bar, ample tables dotting the outdoor space and giving guests plenty of places to sit. They had also constructed a small stage for the bands who played here a few nights a week. The Garage was now one of the most happening spots in Sister Bay on any given summer night.
I saw two bar stools open, and I bee-lined toward them so I could get them before the other couple I saw heading their way.
“Quick. Sit.” I yanked out the stool and nearly pushed Jo into it. When I looked over my shoulder at our competition, they met me with two mirrored glares.
Not this time, folks. I was a man on a mission and that mission involved having a nice evening with Jo. Prime seating at the bar was a good start.
I slid into my stool beside her and pulled out my wallet. “Whatever you want.”
She arched a brow. “Anything?”
“Yep. Anything.”
“Well, in that case, can you order me a cabin without a pain-in-the-ass roommate?”
“Ouch,” I breathed. The pain her words inflicted hurt a little worse tonight, because I’d thought we were mending fences.
Jo closed her eyes and squeezed them tight, a deep breath lifting the shoulders covered by the black leather jacket she loved and had worn for years. “Gah! I’m sorry. I didn’t mean that.”
“Yes, you did. And it’s okay. I don’t blame you.”
When she looked at me, I saw the regret churning inside her eyes. “I’m trying. Honestly, I am. It’s just going to take a little time to stop my forked tongue from spitting out insults at you since it’s been all I’ve done for over a year. Habits die hard.”
“Why the change of heart?” I asked. “Why are you ready to try to forgive me?”
Her face tightened, and she turned away with a slight shake of her head. “Just something Jenna said today when she stopped in at JJ’s.”
“Oh, yeah? So, I have Jenna to thank for the reduction in glares? What did she say?”
A pink flush crept up into her cheeks while she pushed a piece of hair behind her ear. “It was nothing. Just... she just said it’s time to forgive you. I mean, we’re stuck living together, so I’m going to at least try.”
“Thank you. I won’t fuck up again. I promise.”
“W
e’ll see.”
Before I could argue back, the bartender arrived in front of us. “Hey, Jo.”
“Hey, Angie. Can I get a beer? Do you have Door County Brewery’s Pallet Jack?”
“Absolutely. And for your... date?” The blonde bartender raised a brow as her gaze slid to me.
Jo’s head shook so hard I worried it may fly off and roll down the Sister Bay hill. “God, no. Not a date,” she said, and even though I hadn’t expected a date, for some reason the intense denial stung a little. Like I was something to be ashamed of. And maybe I was now. “This is Matt. He’s my... roommate.”
Roommate. I could handle that. Better than “this guy I hate.”
Angie’s eyes lit up and narrowed into seductive slants while she leaned on the bar in front of me, as if Jo’s rejection had opened a door she intended to waltz on through. “And what are you having... roommate Matt?”
Not wanting anything to do with the pretty young thing batting her thick eyelashes at me, I crossed my arms and leaned back. “I’ll have what Jo’s having.”
“You got it, hun.” With a quick wink she turned and walked away.
Jo rolled her eyes and snorted. “Some things never change.”
“What the hell is that supposed to mean?” I leaned forward on the bar and craned my neck to get into her line of sight.
“You. Girls. They’re always throwing themselves at you. It’s gross.”
“Gross?” I laughed. “Well, I can say the same about you and guys. How many times have I had to toss gropey guys out of the bar for you?”
“Whatever.” She shrugged. “I can handle touchy randoms myself.”
“No doubt about that, but I’ve always been happy to come to your rescue. Now, the question is, if this bartender gets too handsy with me, are you going to save me and toss her down the hill?”
Her lips pressed into a thin white line and I welcomed the smile begging to be let free. When she gave in, the soft sounds of her laugh were more melodious than the music playing behind us. It was a sound I hadn’t heard in over a year.
The Other Room (Door Peninsula Passions Book 2) Page 6
