“What thing?”
“The way they look at each other. The energy that moves between them. It’s palpable. And you and Jo?” She scoffed. “I could do a freaking polka on the connection between you. It’s there. And it’s real. Even if you dumbasses won’t admit it.”
She flicked my head again.
“Ow! Stop it!” I laughed, swatting her hand away.
“I’m telling you, I know what I know. This is my skill. My gift. My superpower. And I’m telling you that my superpower is certain you and Jo are totally and completely in love with each other. I’m never wrong. If I was a baseball player, I’d be batting a zero.”
I arched a brow. “A zero? That means you suck.”
“What? Oh. I thought zero meant the number of times I struck out.”
“No. Zero means the number of times you hit the ball.”
“Oh. Well, whatever!” She tossed up her hands again. “Then I’m the opposite of zero. I kick ass at this.”
“I... it’s not possible, Jenna. She doesn’t like me like that.”
Visions of our awkward kiss in eighth grade flooded back to me, followed by memories of the way she’d reacted just the other day when I’d almost kissed her again.
Jenna propped an elbow on the bar and leaned forward. “You keep saying ‘Jo doesn’t like me like that’, instead of ‘I don’t like Jo like that’, which tells me two things. One, that you are crazy about Jo. Two, that since I’m right about your feelings, I’m right about hers. Boom.” She faked a mic drop.
Words rattled around in my brain, but my mouth only opened and closed while I struggled for an argument to explain away her very accurate accusation about my feelings. But one look in her eye and I knew she had me backed into a corner.
Busted.
With a sigh, I leaned forward. “Okay, fine. You caught me. I’m fucking crazy about Jo. Always have been, always will be.”
“YES!” she shouted, pumping her fist in the air.
Jo passed by and slammed to a stop. “What’s up?”
“Nothing!” we echoed, and our unnaturally high-pitched response caused Jo to furrow her brow.
“What’s going on?” she asked again, but her eyes bore into Jenna’s. Another silent standoff between the Parker sisters went down.
“Jo, that guy’s waiting for a drink. Chop, chop.” Jenna clapped her hands, ending the telepathic conversation.
“Just... Jenna.” She pointed a finger in Jenna’s face, and I tried to grasp what the hell they were arguing about.
Me?
Was it possible Jenna was right and Jo was warning her not to say anything?
More memories of Jo running back to the jet ski in disgust after I’d almost kissed her flooded my mind.
Nope. Definitely not what was going on here, because Jo was not into me.
With a final glare, Jo spun on her heel and marched back to work.
“So,” Jenna turned back to me. “As you were saying?” She propped her chin in her hands and batted her long lashes.
“Nothing. Just forget I said anything.”
She slapped my shoulder and then gave me a shake. “No way. Not backing out of this now. You were saying that you’ve always been in love with Jo. And I was saying that meant if I was right about one of you, I’m right about the other.”
I leaned in. “Jenna. I almost kissed Jo at the beach the other day. You saw it. I know you did. And you know what she did? She ran. And then avoided me for three days straight. I’m trying like hell here to keep my feelings for her in check, and you’re not helping. At all. I won’t mess up our friendship, Jenna. I can’t. This last year without her was torture. I won’t risk ruining things again. I need her in my life.”
Jenna’s shoulders lifted with her heavy sigh, and her face softened. “You need her in your life because you love her. And she ran off because, well, she’s Jo. And you know better than anyone that Jo doesn’t do feelings well. She may be tough as nails on the outside, but on the inside, she’s got that melty, gooey center. She’s scared, Matt. Probably of the same thing you are. Of ruining the friendship. And she’s also gotta be so scared of getting hurt.”
It was something Jo would do... running away from something that might get serious. Might cause her to risk getting hurt. But was Jenna right? Was it possible the reason she took off after our almost-kiss involved fear instead of disgust?
The possibility almost melted my mind.
“I’m telling you, Matt. What you’re feeling is not one-sided. But one of you needs to take the leap and get this thing going. You’ve spent twenty-plus years doing this dance together, both of you too chicken-shit to admit how you feel. You’re a grown-ass man now, and you know what grown-ass men do?”
“Pretend they aren’t in love with their best friend for all eternity?” I gave her a sheepish grin.
In turn she flicked my head again. “No, dumbass. You man up and tell her how you feel!”
“I can’t, Jenna. What if you’re wrong? What if she doesn’t feel that way about me and she ends our friendship?”
“She won’t.”
“But what if?”
Jenna blew out an exasperated breath. “Fine. Let’s say on the zero percent chance she’s not into this, what is the worst thing that happens? You tell her, she says no, and it’s a little awkward for a while. But you two are Jo and Matt... you’ll get through it.”
Shrugging, I took a sip of my beer.
“And what if she says yes?” Jenna placed a hand on my shoulder.
What if she says yes?
Images of life with Jo in my arms flashed through my mind. Her touch. Her kiss. Her laugh in my ear when we woke up in the morning. Like a whirlwind of happiness, emotions flooded through me and permeated every inch of my soul. Images I’d never dared to let loose in my mind galloped free as I pictured a life together if she said yes.
A life filled with more happiness than I’d ever imagined possible.
“So?” Jenna prompted.
“So...” I stalled. “So, I’m fucking scared, Jenna.”
“Matt. That’s my baby sister.” She pointed to Jo as she flew past carrying a plate of enchiladas. “Her happiness means more to me than my own. If I didn’t truly believe that she felt the same way about you, I would never say anything. Because if I was wrong, it would mean I would hurt her by damaging your friendship. I would never hurt her, Matt. Never.”
I tried to let her certainty dissolve my fears.
“Matt, you need to tell her. You need to tell her tonight... before you chicken out. You’re M.F.O.E.”
I scrunched my brow.
“Made for each other.” She went to flick my head again, but I caught her hand in mine, bringing it down onto my lap and giving it a gentle squeeze.
“Are you sure, Jenna? Like a million percent sure? Because if I do this there is no going back.”
She returned the squeeze and smiled. “I’m sure. Tell her, Matt.”
Fear like I’d never known coursed through my veins when I looked up at Jo. She turned and locked eyes with me, a soft smile lifting the lips I was desperate to taste. Thinking of living a life beside her as only a friend and never knowing what could have been, I knew what I needed to do now.
Jenna was right. It was time.
“Okay. I’ll do it.”
Jenna’s squeal rang my eardrums, and she pulled me in for a hug. “Yay! It’s gonna be great!”
“Just hold on to your celebrating there, Meddlypants. She hasn’t said yes yet.”
“She will,” Jenna whispered in my ear and then sat back.
God, I hope so.
Jo appeared holding my sandwich and just the sight of her sent my heart racing faster than if I’d flung myself out of an airplane.
“Here you go.” She set the sandwich down in front of me.
Normally my mouth would water when I saw my favorite pork sandwich covered in cheese, onions, and peppers, but one look at it and my already queasy stomach turned.
With the nerve
s I had right now, eating had gone from the first thing on my mind to the last. Not to mention if there was even a one percent chance of a kiss with Jo tonight, those onions weren’t my friend. “You know what? So sorry to be a pain, but can I get this to go?”
Jo shrugged and pulled the plate back. “No problem.”
Jenna kicked me under the bar, and I let out a deep sigh. “Hey, Jo?”
She stopped and turned back. “Yeah?”
“Um, what time are you off tonight?”
“Probably midnight?”
“Okay. Um... do you want to like hang out or something? With me?”
She shrugged and nodded. “Sure. If you’re still up.”
“Yeah. I’ll wait up.”
“Okay, I’ll see you at home then?”
“Yeah. Sounds good.”
When she walked away, Jenna gave me an appreciative nod. “Atta boy. Rip it off like a band-aid.”
“You’d better be right, Jenna.”
“I’m right. You’ll see.” She bopped me on the nose, then settled back into her seat. “I’m a fucking professional.”
Even if she wasn’t right about Jo’s feelings for me, she was right about one thing. I had to try. To miss out on the chance of having Jo in my life as more than a friend was a risk I’d regret forever if I didn’t at least try.
And now I had to come up with the perfect way to turn our friendship upside down.
CHAPTER TWELVE
MATT
“Wine, check. Blanket, check. Balls, no check,” I mumbled to myself while I paced the little cabin waiting for Jo to get home. Petunia watched with cautious eyes as I burned a hole through the floor. “Don’t judge me, Petunia. I’m freaking out. I could use some support here. A little camaraderie, you know.”
A warning growl and her hiss were my only encouragement.
The moment of truth had arrived, hurried along by an unlikely messenger. Over twenty-five years of pining for Jo and tonight I was going to confess it. Put my heart out on a platter and hope she didn’t pummel it into smithereens.
I looked at my phone. Only fifteen minutes until midnight. Fifteen minutes to get my shit together and figure out the perfect thing to say. Why the fuck had Cassie picked this week to take Jake up North fly-fishing and out of cell-phone range? I could use them right now and they wouldn’t be home until tomorrow night. If they were here, I’d be making Cassie run lines with me while I begged Jake to talk me off the ledge.
But they were gone, and I was alone.
Alone with my runaway thoughts of seeing Jo’s face twist in disgust when I told her that I didn’t want to be what we’d always been. The same face she’d made when I’d kissed her in eighth grade.
I cringed just thinking about it.
The face that said we were just friends.
Footsteps drummed up the stairs, and with them my heart beat faster. Jo appeared in the doorway, pushing it open and tossing her purse on the couch.
“You’re early,” I blurted.
Damn it. I needed those extra fifteen minutes to compose myself.
“Yep. You and Jenna took off, things stayed crazy at the bar for a bit, but then they slowed down. So, I’m a little early.”
“You’re early,” I repeated, panic turning my brain to mush.
Jo’s eyebrows snapped together. “Yeah? Is that a problem?”
“Um, no. No not at all. It’s great. Yep, totally great. You’re early.”
“What the hell is wrong with you?” She tugged off her hairband and her ponytail turned into long, flowing waves of hair brushing across her back. The sight of her hair swaying as she ran her fingers through it nearly took me to my knees with screams of “I love you!” rolling off my lips.
Keep it together.
“Nothing. Just... I’m fine.”
“So, we’re hanging out? Family Guy or do you want to do Sons of Anarchy or something? I spent all night in a bar so I’m not really up for going out.”
“I, uh... I actually had a different idea.”
“Oh yeah?” She flopped down on our new couch. “What’s that?”
“Well, I remembered that tonight is the start of the Perseids meteor shower.”
Her eyes lit up. “Oh, yeah! That’s right! I love the Perseids!”
Part of the joy of living in Door County was the lack of urban lights. It was why people flooded up here from the cities, to enjoy our skies filled with millions of stars, and the Northern Lights that danced across the sky many nights in the summer. And on a few August nights every summer, hundreds of meteors would streak across the sky like our own private intergalactic light show. The Perseids meteor shower. It was something that Jo had loved when we were kids, and I was glad to hear that hadn’t changed.
On the right track. Keep it together.
“I know. I remember. We used to watch them every year when we were kids, remember? Begging our moms to let us stay up late and see them?”
“I remember.” She smiled. “I haven’t seen them in a couple years. That sounds awesome. Wanna crack a couple beers and sit on the porch in the dark and watch them?”
Swiping a hand across the back of my neck, I shifted my weight. “I, uh, had a different idea. I thought we could get away from all the lights so we could see them really clearly.”
“How so?” She kicked off her shoes.
“There’s a little rowboat I noticed just up the beach. I thought we could take it out a little way then watch them from the water.”
“A little rowboat?” she asked, the concern heavy in her voice. “Do you mean you want to steal a rowboat?”
“Borrow.” I grinned. “The house has been dark all week. They aren’t even up here right now, so what’s wrong with borrowing a perfectly good rowboat from next door?”
“This is one of those ideas that gets us thrown in the slammer, isn’t it?”
“It’s midnight, everyone is asleep, and we’ll have it back in no time with no one the wiser. Come on, Jo... you chicken?” I hit her soft spot.
“Am I chicken? What are we, ten again?”
“So, you’re chicken.” I crossed my arms and watched her face tense up.
“I’m not chicken.”
“Prove it.”
“I’m not falling for that anymore. I’m not a kid. You can’t convince me to do stuff I don’t want to do just by calling me chicken.”
“Okay then... chicken.” I let out a bawk and her face turned red.
“Get the boat.”
“Ha!” I clapped and laughed. “I knew you couldn’t resist.”
She cocked a hip. “Just hurry up before I change my mind. I’m changing my clothes.”
“I’ll paddle it up front. Meet me on the beach.”
Jo headed into her room, and I grabbed the blankets and the bottle of wine and raced out the door. The boat was just a short jog down the beach, and when I got to it, I tossed in my shoes, the blankets and wine, then looked around to make sure no one was watching. After rolling up my pants, I pushed it toward the water, and it ground against the rocks, the sound echoing through the still night. I cringed, pushing it slower and hoping no one heard all the noise. When it slid into the water, the loud clanking of rocks subsided and all I heard were the gentle waves lapping along the shore.
The cool water sent a chill through me as I waded out a little farther before climbing over the edge. As I settled into my seat, the tiny boat rocked beneath my weight, and I almost dropped an oar into the water.
“Don’t fuck it up now,” I breathed as I re-situated the oars and started paddling toward the lights of our cabin.
When I got there, Jo stood on the beach in a pair of jersey pants and a sweatshirt. Even in the casual clothing, she’d never looked more beautiful.
“We’d better not get busted,” she said as I pulled up on the beach.
“Your chariot awaits.” I hopped out and held the boat steady while she climbed in and sat on the small back bench seat. When she looked settled, I pushed the boat
back out and then hopped inside.
“Careful!” she laughed, holding onto the edges while the boat teetered back and forth.
“Sorry.” I sucked the air through my teeth as I took my seat and waited for the rocking to stop. “Little boat.”
“Little stolen boat,” she added, and then chuckled.
“Borrowed.” I smiled and started paddling.
Jo leaned back, staring up at the sky as I paddled us away from the lights on the shore. When we were far enough out that the lights from shore dimmed, I fumbled for the anchor at my feet then tossed it overboard. I felt it hit bottom, and I gave it a tug to make sure we wouldn’t float off and require a rescue from the Coast Guard. Getting busted in a stolen boat wasn’t exactly part of my perfect romantic evening.
“There. Perfect.” Careful not to rock the boat, I leaned down and pulled out the folded blankets.
“What’s that?” Jo pointed to them.
“Blankets. So we can lay back and watch the meteor shower.”
“Oh,” she answered, and I saw something flash across her face.
I searched her expression, analyzing it. If I had to put money on it, I’d pick concern. Did she not want to lay next to me? Did the thought revolt her? Was Jenna wrong?
Trying not to lose the gumption I was barely hanging onto, I pushed forward. With a wave of my arms, I flung the blanket into the air and let it settle onto the floor.
“Go ahead. You get situated and then I’ll join you.”
Jo bit her lip then nodded. The boat teetered as she shifted to the floor, and I braced against it while I waited for her to get settled. Once she was lying down with her feet on one seat and her head at an awkward angle on the seat beside me, I climbed down beside her.
“Here. We can use this blanket as a pillow.” I lifted the other thick blanket and gestured to her head. Jo sat forward, and I placed the blanket behind her, then laid my head back beside hers and kicked my feet up on the other bench. “Not bad! Pretty comfy for a tiny boat!”
“Not bad at all.” She glanced over at me and the close proximity of her lips sent a surge of excitement and panic flooding back through me.
The usual chant of just friends started up in my head, but this time I told it to get lost. Tonight, that taunting voice wasn’t welcome here. Tonight was about confessing my feelings for her... the ones I’d harbored since before I learned to ride a bike. And I couldn’t remember a time in my life I’d been more terrified.
The Other Room (Door Peninsula Passions Book 2) Page 13
