by Maggie Cole
She scowls at me and steps into the elevator with Charlotte, shaking her head.
“You don’t know what just happened,” I tell them both.
Charlotte is crying, and Vivian pulls her face into her shoulder, then pushes a button.
I step into the elevator.
“Get out, Xander,” Vivian yells at me.
“No. You have this all wrong.”
The bouncer puts his arm against the door. “Sir, you need to step out of the elevator.”
I reach for Charlotte, but Vivian smacks my hand. “Don’t touch her.”
“You have this wrong,” I sternly say again, looking Vivian in the eye.
“Sir, you need to step out now, or we will remove you,” the guard says.
This isn’t happening. I step off the elevator. “Charlotte!” I try one more time. Vivian glares at me as the doors shut.
I turn to figure out where the stairs are, but Chase is right behind me. “Xander, just let it go tonight.”
“I didn’t do anything. It’s not my fault. I didn’t want that.”
He puts his hand on my shoulder and nods. “Let them be tonight. Tell me what happened.”
“Billie’s here.”
“Billie?”
I nod. “She’s wasted and practically jumped on me. I held her up so she wouldn’t fall, and she grabbed me and kissed me. I tried to pull out of it, and I didn’t kiss her back, I swear.”
“Shit, Xander.”
I rub my palms over my face. “Tell me this isn’t happening.”
Chase nods toward the VIP area. “Come back into the room.”
The elevator opens again, and a few people get off. I step inside. “I got to go.”
Chase rides down with me. “Xander, leave her alone tonight. Let her cool off.”
Angrily, I glare at him. “Charlotte isn’t just a girl to me, Chase. I love her.”
“Okay. Still, let her be tonight.”
“Advice coming from the king of players himself. Sure, Chase,” I tell him.
He snarls, “What the fuck does that mean?”
“Nothing,” I mutter.
“No. You said it, so explain yourself.”
I sneer. “Okay. Fine. What the hell is up with you and Vivian? Are you playing her like you play all your other girls?”
Chase steps closer to me. “What’s going on between Vivian and me is none of your concern. But, for your information, no, I’m not playing her. I like her. And I don’t play girls. They all know the arrangement.”
I take a deep breath. “I’m sorry. It’s not my business.”
He pauses for a minute. “Nothing good will come of you going after Charlotte tonight. I’ll talk to Vivian. Come back upstairs with me.”
I shake my head. “No. I’m done with this place for the night.”
The elevator opens, and we step out.
“Okay, then, let me come with you. We’ll go grab a beer or something.”
“Thanks, but I need to be alone.”
Chase sighs. “Don’t you think you’ve been alone enough this year?”
I scoff. “Apparently not.”
22
Charlotte
Not only did he kiss another woman, he kissed her.
My gut flips so fast I think I’m going to get sick.
We’re in the cab, on the way to my place, and tears are streaming down my face. Images of Xander holding her in his arms, bent over, with her hands on his head, and passionately kissing him play like a broken record in my head.
And she’s beautiful. There isn’t a thing I could say about how she looks to try to make me feel better. She’s flawless from her head to her toes.
They looked like they belonged together. She fit in his arms perfectly.
My gut flips so bad I roll down the window, scared I might get sick.
“Char, you okay?” Vivian softly asks.
I shake my head and more tears fall. Vivian pulls my head onto her shoulder, and we say nothing more until we pull up to my building.
When we get into my apartment, I throw on pajamas and come back out to the living room.
“You don’t have to stay. I appreciate you coming with me, but I’ll be okay. Go have fun with Chase.”
“Nothing is going on with Chase and me.”
“You keep saying that, but I don’t believe it.”
“Well, believe it.”
I stare at her. “Did something happen between you two?”
“Nope.”
“But you want it to?”
“No. He has his schedule of women, and I will not be one of them.”
“His schedule of women?”
She sighs. “When you were in the hospital, and Quinn and I stayed with Chase and Jamison, it was pretty clear.”
“He had them over when you were there?”
She scoffs. “No. But his phone kept ringing off the hook with them, and one girl must not have gotten the cancellation notice because she stopped by. When she saw me, she commented to him that Thursday was their day.”
“You have to be kidding me. She knows she’s a day of the week?”
Vivian shrugs. “Apparently.”
“Damn, Viv. I’m sorry.”
“It’s fine. We haven’t ever been together.”
“Yeah, but you like each other.”
She shrugs again. “Enough about me. Are you going to tell me what happened?”
My pulse increases, thinking again about Billie in Xander’s arms. “I walked out of the bathroom, and he was kissing Billie.”
“Billie? As in the Billie, he obsessed over for months?” she cries out.
“Gee, thanks for reminding me, Viv.”
“Sorry.”
Not as sorry as I am.
“How did...”
“I don’t know. All I know is one minute Xander and I were kissing. Then I went to the bathroom and then Billie was in his arms. He was leaned over, almost like in a dance pose, and she was gripping his head, and they were lip-locked.”
“Ouch,” Vivian mumbles.
“Yeah. Ouch.”
Vivian is quiet for a moment. “It doesn’t make sense to me.”
“What doesn’t?”
“Xander was adamant he was in love with you and not Billie.”
“When did you talk with Xander?”
“Yesterday. We looked at apartments, and he was heartbroken. Or he seemed it. He told me about his dreams and that you kicked him out of your place and car. Oh, and that Damon is harassing you? Why didn’t you tell me?”
I sigh. “It all happened this week. It’s been a roller coaster.”
Let’s get off of it together. Xander’s voice flies through my mind. My heart rips open wider.
“What did Damon do?”
“Viv, I don’t want to get into it right now. Can I tell you about it later?”
“Okay.”
After a few minutes, she says, “Char, I know you think you saw what you saw, but are you sure Xander would do that to you? He told me he didn’t love her, that he loved you. He was distraught yesterday.”
“She was in his arms. He called her Billie. His lips were against hers. What else is there to know?”
Vivian nervously scans my eyes. “I don’t know, but maybe you should talk to him. He kept saying you had it wrong. Maybe you do?”
I sneer. “Not quite sure how I could get that one wrong.”
Vivian’s phone buzzes, and she types to someone, back and forth for a bit. She finally looks up and says, “I think you need to talk with Xander.”
“Tell me you aren’t texting him right now.”
“No, I’m texting Chase. But he said he saw Billie and her friend and that Billie is wasted and you need to talk to Xander.”
“Just because Billie is wasted doesn’t excuse Xander kissing her!” I snap.
“Chase says she kissed him, and he didn’t kiss her back.”
“Coming from a guy who cheats on girls with a calendar,” I shoot bac
k at Vivian.
She appears slightly hurt.
“What?” I ask her.
“He isn’t cheating on them. They know about it. Those girls agree to it.”
“That makes it okay?”
She looks at me. “Yes, it does. If they didn’t know about it, then fine, but everyone involved knows about it. So he isn’t cheating on anyone, and it’s not fair for you to say that about him.”
She has a point I can’t argue with her about. “I’m sorry. I’m just upset and pissed at Xander.”
“Maybe he’s not to blame for this, either.”
A tear slips down my cheek. “Why did it have to be her? Why couldn’t he have been kissing some other girl?”
Vivian puts her arm around me. “I know it sucks it was her, but if he kissed someone else, you wouldn’t like that, either.”
She’s right. I don’t want Xander kissing anyone except me.
“Char, do you really think Xander would do that to you? I just don’t see it.”
I only love you. Xander’s words roll into my head and cut me like a knife. Do I think he would do that to me? No. But thoughts and reality are two different things, and I learned that a long time ago.
“You didn’t see it. I did.”
“I know, but don’t you think you should at least listen to him first? I don’t think you have the entire story.”
I’m getting exhausted explaining myself. “I’m not talking to him. I can’t keep doing this. For six months, all I’ve had is constant heartache. I’m so tired of hurting.” I cry again.
Vivian hugs me tighter then takes me by the shoulders and looks me in the eye. “Char, do you love him?”
I cry harder and nod.
“Then you need to talk to him.”
Even though Vivian tells me to talk to Xander, I don’t. I can’t get the visual of Billie in his arms, or her lips pressed against his, or her hands gripping his head out of my brain.
And it gets worse over the weekend.
Now I put Xander’s sleeping words with a face.
I see them dating.
I see them kissing.
I see them fucking.
Over the next few days, Xander sends me text messages and tries to call and FaceTime me, but I don’t answer or return any of his messages.
“I love you and only you.”
“You don’t know what happened. I did not kiss her back.”
“Charlotte, call me. We’ve come too far for this to keep us apart.”
“You’re killing me, Charlotte. Seriously. Please, answer me.”
When my doorbell buzzes, I don’t answer it. But he must have slipped in when someone left because he is soon banging on the door. “Charlotte, please,” he begs through the door and my heart bleeds even more. His voice alone is enough to tear me apart. He finally slips a piece of paper underneath.
Charlotte,
You’re my only. I would never cheat on you. Please. We need to talk.
I love you forever,
Xander
I want to open the door and let him wrap me in his arms. But I don’t.
Betrayed. That is how I feel, and I allow it to eat at me and guide my decisions.
Is Vivian right and any girl would make me feel this way? Maybe. But the fact it was Billie, the woman he obsessed over for six months, the woman he dismissed me for without a second thought, is extra cruel.
When Sunday comes around, my heart aches so much I decide I need to hear him out, at least let him tell me his side. It’s about two in the afternoon, and I bundle up to go out into the cold. I am walking to Xander’s hotel, since I haven’t been outside in two days, and that’s when my heart gets another stab.
About a block from Xander’s hotel, through a coffee shop window, I see them. All of them.
Noah, Chase, Jamison, and Xander are sitting in a booth. A chair is pulled up to the end of the table, and Billie is sitting in it.
I freeze, not believing it’s her. But it’s without a doubt the same woman I saw at the club.
The five of them are deep in conversation, and I don’t know how long I stare, as anger and devastation grip me. My chest tightens and I have to remind myself to breathe. Tears fall down my cheeks.
As if in slow motion, Xander looks over at me. He blinks, like he’s not sure it’s me, then pushes Jamison out of his seat and tries to get out of the booth.
I turn and run down the street and hear him yelling my name. I’m not paying attention, and instead of stopping at the crosswalk, I bolt right through it.
I feel the jolt and see Xander and hear him screaming as I go flying. Then everything becomes dark, then light, then red lights.
“Charlotte,” Xander is saying my name. I can’t move my neck or my body. Everything hurts. Lights are flashing, and I can hear a lot of people talking about me.
I try to speak, but my words come out mumbled.
“Shh,” Xander whispers, as a tear drips onto my cheek, and his hand pets my forehead.
His eyes come into focus, then out, then back in. Everything disappears except for his eyes, and his voice.
Suddenly, I feel like I’m moving, but I can’t move my body. “Xa…”
“It’s okay, baby. Shh. We’re almost there.” I feel his hand on mine, and his eyes once again come into focus.
Pain courses through me and I moan and struggle to focus.
“Stay awake, Charlotte. Just stay with me,” Xander pleads.
And I try. But the darkness overpowers me.
23
Xander
Charlotte won’t talk to me or text me back. All weekend I try, but she won’t budge. When Sunday comes around, the guys knock on my hotel door and drag me out to the coffee shop.
“Vivian said she told Charlotte to talk to you,” Chase claims.
“Well, Charlotte isn’t listening.” I sink back into the booth.
“Eventually, she has to talk to you. You two work together,” Jamison points out.
I shake my head. “She will tell me to keep it professional, I bet. That’s what she tried to do last time.”
Noah is sitting across from me. “I know that phrase way too well.”
I roll my eyes at him.
He turns to Chase. “What’s up with you and Vivian? You aren’t playing here, are you?”
“Will everyone stop asking me that? I am not playing with Vivian,” Chase insists.
“Then what is going on between you two? I don’t need Piper upset with me over whatever you’re doing with her.” Noah scowls at him.
Chase shakes his head. “Yeah, well she refuses to talk to me until Friday, so tell Piper to line up on the list of people pissed at me.”
“What did you do?” Noah asks angrily.
“I’m not getting into it. I’m a dick, I need to talk to her; she won’t let me until Friday. End of story.” Chase looks away hurt.
“What’s up with you and Quinn?” I ask Jamison, trying to give Chase a break.
“Another good question. What are you doing, Jamison?” Noah raises an eyebrow in question.
He is about to answer when Noah says, “Keep your cool, Xander.”
I soon find out why he said that.
“Wow! I never thought I would find the four of you in Chicago!” Billie beams at us.
I groan, and Noah gives me a “be nice” look.
Billie pulls up a chair next to our booth.
This would be my luck. For six months, I was desperate to find this woman, and now I want nothing to do with her, but she keeps popping up.
I try to think of something civil to say. “Good to see you sober, Billie.” I fail.
She waves her hand. “Like I’ve never had you kiss me when you were drunk. Don’t act like a saint, Xander.”
I gape in disbelief. “We were dating when that happened, and it was over a dozen years ago.”
She laughs. “Big deal.”
“It is a big deal. My girlfriend won’t talk to me right now.”
&n
bsp; Billie cringes. “Hey, sorry. I didn’t mean to cause any problems. You know how I am when I’m drinking.”
Has she not grown up at all in over twelve years?
“Do you want me to talk to her? Tell her I was intoxicated and just having a bit of fun?”
God, no. “No, I do not want you to talk to my girlfriend.”
She shrugs. “Suit yourself. So, what are you all doing in Chicago?”
“Chase and I are visiting. Noah and Xander live here,” Jamison offers.
“What are you doing here?” I ask her.
“Just visiting. I live out in California now. My husband is a producer in Hollywood.”
So that’s where she went.
“Wait! You’re married, and you kissed me?”
She waves her hand at me again. “I don’t know why you’re making such a big deal about this. Honestly. We used to do a lot more than kiss.”
Noah’s eyes widen, and he covers his mouth, stifling a laugh.
“And what would your husband say about that?” I’m not into kissing married women.
Billie throws her head back in gales of laughter. “It’s the twenty-first century. Just because you’re married doesn’t mean you can’t have some innocent fun on the side.”
This is the woman I obsessed about for six months? I am the biggest asshole on earth.
I suddenly have an immense feeling of gratitude we broke up when we did.
“Innocent fun? Is that what you call it?” I snarl at her.
“Since when did you get so uptight, Xander? You used to be fun, from what I remember. Well, before you got into med school.”
I feel nothing but disgust.
Jamison jumps in. “You like California?”
“Yes, it’s great. Hey, Valeria has made it big-time. I keep hoping I run into her out in Hollywood but so far no luck. My husband wants to have her in one of his films soon.”
Jamison nods. “Yes, she’s done well. I think she’s booked for the next eighteen months on several projects, so he might want to get in line. She’s being selective on her roles nowadays.”
“You still with Jennifer, Chase?” Billie asks.
Chase’s jaw tightens. “Not in eight years.”
“Oh, that’s too bad. She was a sweet girl.”
