by Louise Bay
“I don’t know.” He held out his hand, and I took it tentatively. “Come on,” he said as he led me across the room to the dance floor.
I’d never danced with Luke. Come to think of it, I couldn’t remember the last time I’d slow danced with a guy. High school, probably. I wasn’t sure I could remember how. Thankfully, the dance floor quickly became busy, and Luke guided us through the couples to the far end, away from the tables.
“So, how do we do this?” he asked as we stood facing each other.
I laughed, relaxing at the fact that his thoughts were so similar to my own. “I really have no idea. We can go and sit back down if you like.”
He bent to hear me, and his hands circled my waist. Sparks went off across my body. I reached up, pushing my palms up his chest to his shoulders.
“No,” he said. “I want to dance with you.”
He watched my face for reaction but I looked away. I couldn’t let him see that I wanted to dance with him too. His hands slid up my back and he pressed me against him. My heart was racing; I wasn’t used to this amount of physical contact with him. My whole body was touching his as we swayed in time to the music.
Luke bent his head to my ear so our cheeks were touching. “Are we doing this right?” he asked.
I didn’t know how to respond.
“It feels right,” he said.
It felt too good. I shouldn’t have let this situation get so out of hand. I had had far too much to drink and now I was here, in Luke’s arms, tricking myself into thinking what I was feeling was mutual. I should stop, push him away. I should go home. At the end of this dance, that’s what I would do. I had spent the last few months trying to close off my heart to Luke, and doing a pretty good job, and now here he was opening up old wounds.
“You look beautiful tonight. I mean, bombshell beautiful,” he whispered.
I should make him stop saying these things. He was feeding my addiction to him.
“What are you thinking?” he asked when I didn’t respond. His hands roamed down to my waist then slid up my back again.
“I think I like dancing with you more than I should,” I replied. His lips brushed my neck, but in the mayhem of sensations assaulting me, maybe I imagined it.
The song ended, and I started to pull away. “Not yet,” he said. “Can we stay here, like this, for a bit longer? I don’t want to go back.”
Those words had more meaning than he’d intended, didn’t they? What did he mean like this? Like Ash and Luke—lifelong friends—but closer, touching, on the brink of something?
Eight
Luke
She felt so good. This felt so good, so right. Did she feel it too? I didn’t want to be here anymore. I wanted it to be just Ash and me. I didn’t want to talk to all these people who were part of my working life. Ash was my real life.
The music changed to something more up-tempo. She pulled back again, and this time I let her. “Wanna get out of here?” I asked.
“Are you sure you don’t want to stay and celebrate your win?”
“Have you still got that tequila you brought back from Mexico at your place?” I asked.
“Yeah, I think so.”
“Let’s go and have a celebratory shot.”
She grinned, and we headed out, my hand at the small of her back. I didn’t want to lose contact with her, not for a second. We didn’t stop to say we were leaving; we just headed to the exit, found a cab. I was nervous. I’d been to Ash’s place a million times, but tonight was different. Tonight, she wasn’t just Ash my best friend, she was Ash the bombshell. Ash who I had slow danced with. Ash who I’d almost kissed. Ash who I wanted to kiss.
“So, thanks for inviting me tonight,” she said, almost as if she was trying to find something to say.
“I’m really pleased you came,” I said. I meant it.
“I’ll be your fill-in date anytime.” She grinned at me. She was so beautiful. The light collected around her, making her glow.
I took a beat just to savor that incredible smile. “You’ll never be that, Ash.” Her eyes narrowed, just slightly. If I hadn’t known her, I wouldn’t have noticed. “You’re no-one’s understudy.”
“I just meant—”
“I didn’t invite you tonight because Emma and I’d split—I asked you before that happened. I asked you because there was no one I’d rather spend an evening with.” I meant it.
She didn’t respond, so I searched her face to see if she’d understood. I found a mixture of confusion and apprehension on her face. Was I coming on too strong? Did she not feel this?
The cab pulled up to her building before I got a chance to ask her. I followed her into the night air and into her building. We were silent in the lift. Every atom of my body wanted to pull her toward me, but I resisted. I didn’t want to scare her. I’d hate to spoil our friendship if she didn’t feel the same way. I couldn’t live without her in my life in one way or another—but in that moment I wanted her to be my whole life.
“So, tequila,” she said as she flung her bag on the hall table, kicked off her shoes and made her way to the kitchen. I followed her, pulled out two shot glasses from the cupboard above the refrigerator and then grabbed limes, quickly cutting them into slices. I knew her kitchen almost better than I knew the one I’d shared with Emma. Ash produced the tequila and the salt, and we settled ourselves in the living room, sitting on the rug, our ingredients set out in front of us on the coffee table.
We exchanged glances, as if we knew we were at the starting line. I raised the tequila bottle as a question and she nodded.
“We should do a truth or a dare before every shot,” she announced.
I grinned. Perfect.
“You start,” she said.
I carefully poured out the shots, trying to formulate a question that would open the door without scaring her off. “Did you find Isaac attractive?” I asked. I wanted to know the answer. What was her type? Was it Richard? Isaac?
Me?
She frowned and regarded me carefully. “He’s good looking,” she said as my heart sped up. It wasn’t the answer I’d wanted. “And funny, which is important. I guess a little.” Jealousy gnawed at my gut and I tried to take a deep breath without her noticing.
“Do you have a type?” I asked. My attention was focused on her lithe legs as she shifted to sit cross-legged in front of me.
“Hey, you can’t have two questions in a row. Do your shot.”
I grinned, licked the back of my hand, poured on the salt and did my shot. I felt Ash’s gaze on me. What was she thinking? I closed my eyes as the tequila burned a trail down my throat. What was she going to ask me?
I watched as she refilled my glass. “Your turn,” I said.
She ran her index finger across her bottom lip as she considered her question. Blood sped to my cock at the thought of her mouth on me.
“What do you want me to ask you?”
I held her gaze. She was clever. She’d asked me a question without asking me a question. She was holding back, and I understood that. This was new, shaky territory that we were in. The corners of my mouth twitched.
“Ask me something . . . intimate.”
Did her breath catch?
She searched for the salt, and I picked it up as she reached for it. Instead of giving it to her, I took her hand, turning it to expose her palm. I leaned forward and licked a line across her wrist. She tasted as sweet as she smelled, and I had to hold myself back from pinning her to the floor and devouring her whole. Her eyes were fixed to mine and her mouth was parted. I poured salt across the wet mark I’d made, but didn’t let go of her hand.
Slowly she bent her head, her tongue echoing the path I’d just made, and reluctantly I let go of her hand. She threw back her shot.
Keeping her eyes on mine, she licked her fingers free of lime juice.
“Your turn,” she said, shifting forward, her dress revealing the curve of her breast. I had to suppress a moan. She was so fucking beautiful.
“When you put on that dress tonight, did you want me to notice you?”
She looked away and whispered, “I always want you to notice me.”
My stomach flipped. She was raising the stakes. Quickly, I did my shot. I wanted to know what was next.
“Why are you here?” she asked, looking directly at me.
It was a good question. The ultimate question. Why was I there? I was there to risk everything. I could fob her off. Tell her we were celebrating, rather than mention how I wanted to spend every last moment of this evening with her. It was as though this urge to be with her had broken free within me and now was overwhelming my every thought, my every action.
“Because I want to kiss you,” I said. It had been true since I’d first seen her in that dress; it just wasn’t the whole truth.
Her cheeks flushed, and she looked away. “All of a sudden?” she asked, suspicion in her voice.
“Hey, you can’t have two questions in a row. Do your shot,” I said, using her words against her. “Do you want me to help?”
“I think I can manage this time.”
I needed her to digest what I’d said. I wanted to give her time to think about whether or not she wanted to kiss me. Would I have to convince her to kiss me back?
Without sparing me a single glance, she went through the tequila ritual, squeezing her eyes shut at the burn of the alcohol.
“My turn.” My heart was beating through my chest. “So you have to tell me the truth, whatever it is,” I said, reminding her that there would be no way out of this question. She nodded. “Do you want me to kiss you?”
She looked away as if I’d wounded her. “Luke,” she said. “You can’t ask me that.” Her voice was soft, sad even.
“Why?” I was genuinely confused.
“Because you know the answer,” she said.
“I do?” Maybe I did. Maybe there had always been something beneath the joking and the teasing that felt true.
“You know that I’ve wanted you to kiss me since forever. I might joke about us, but it doesn’t mean that I’m not serious.”
My heart clenched at her honesty. It was one of the many things I loved about her. We didn’t need to play truth or dare. Every conversation with Ash was honest.
I took a deep breath. This was it. This was the point of no return. I downed my shot of tequila. No salt, no lime. “You’re beautiful.” I leaned forward, my hand on the back of her neck.
“Luke,” she whispered. It was half warning me away, half calling me home.
I was close enough to feel her breath against my lips. I moved forward and pressed my mouth against hers. She was soft and open, and I pushed my tongue into her mouth, wanting to taste more of her, all of her.
Ashleigh
Luke was kissing me.
Luke was kissing me! I felt it in every inch of my body. I wasn’t quite sure how we ended up that way. All I knew was how right it felt, how it was as I’d always imagined it would be—perfect. He was strong and firm and eager—so eager—as if he’d forgotten it was me. As though he’d forgotten our history and all the complications that this kiss brought. Everything disappeared with the press of his lips.
He let out a small, contented sigh and pulled away from me slightly. “You’re so beautiful,” he whispered. It was what I’d always wanted to hear from him, but now I had, it didn’t seem real somehow.
“Is that the tequila talking?” I asked softly, confused by what seemed such a sudden change of heart. Luke pulled back even more and moved to sit on the sofa. I’d ruined the moment, broken the spell. But then he held out his hand to me. I took it, and he coaxed me onto his lap.
He stroked my back as he buried his head in my neck. “No . . . I don’t know. I think it’s been building for a while, and I’ve only now noticed. I was surprised that I didn’t really like you dating Richard. I couldn’t figure out why it bothered me, and then tonight, when I saw you, I realized.”
“Realized?” I asked.
He brushed the hair from my neck and bent to kiss it. “Yeah, that I wanted to kiss you.”
It wasn’t much of an explanation, but my brain was foggy with confusion and lust and tequila. My body bowed toward his as if I were under his total control. He trailed kisses down my collarbone. Did I need to know everything, right at this second? As if answering my question, his mouth met mine again, his tongue running along the seam of my lips. Did he feel what I was feeling? I reached for him. Completed our connection. I never wanted to let him go.
My hands roamed across his chest. I’d always imagined what it would feel like, but he was harder than I had expected, more defined. He shifted underneath me and groaned. I stilled for a moment, wondering briefly if I shouldn’t be touching him. “Don’t stop,” he whispered, and he moved me off his lap and pushed me down on the sofa, crawling over me.
He kneed my legs apart and looked at me before diving for my mouth again. I could feel him properly now. He was hard against my thigh. He wanted me. In a way I never thought he would, he wanted me. This had been building in me for fifteen years, but somehow it had all happened so fast. It was nothing I’d expected.
“Jesus, you taste so good, Ash. How did I not know you tasted like this?” he asked, pressing kisses between my breasts.
My skin heated everywhere he touched. His words, his fingers, his lips—they all conspired to pull me under. It felt so good—almost too good.
“Luke,” I said softly. He didn’t seem to hear me. “Luke,” I repeated. I put my hands on either side of his face.
He looked at me, his eyes burning.
“What are we doing?” I asked.
He dropped a kiss on my lips then moved to my side. With his leg slung over mine, he propped his head up on his hand. “You don’t want this?” he asked as he trailed his hand up and down my body.
“Yes, of course, but . . .”
“But you wonder what happens next: Will we still be friends? What will Haven say? Will it be good?”
I smiled at him. “Yeah. That’s pretty much it.”
He nodded. “That’s all I’ve been thinking about all night. Well, in between wondering how you’d taste, what it would feel like to be buried in you and what you look like when you come.”
“Luke,” I said, embarrassed.
“I can’t help it. It’s like someone’s opened a door, and I’ve stepped through to this different world. There’s no going back.”
I placed my hand on my chest to try to calm my heart. “Do you think we should slow down?” I asked. We were moving quickly, and soon we would be at a point where things would change forever.
“Whatever you want. I don’t want to push you into anything. My heart and my groin are saying one thing, but maybe my brain is in synch with yours.”
“I’m pretty sure our groins are in agreement, too,” I said with a laugh.
Luke grinned at me. “You have the most fantastic smile. I’ve always thought so.”
“Let’s make a promise that whatever happens tonight, we make sure we’re always family.”
“That’s non-negotiable as far as I’m concerned,” he said with that sexy grin that had made my insides melt since forever.
“Then kiss me.” I was giving him, and myself, permission to cross the line of no return.
I could tell by the way he looked at me that he knew what I was saying. He searched my face, maybe to find a trace of doubt, but I knew there wasn’t any. He stood and held out his hand to me. The nerves in my stomach danced as I took it. He led me down the corridor to my bedroom.
What if it wasn’t good? What if he had some weird kink I couldn’t get into? What happened if my body didn’t respond to him the way my mind did?
“Are you nervous?” he asked as we stepped inside my bedroom.
“A little,” I replied, breathlessly.
He swept a hand down my back then pulled me toward him. “Me too,” he said. I’d never known Luke to be nervous about anything. Could he be nervous abou
t being with me?
Our bodies were pressed against each other. I reached for the buttons of his shirt, methodically undoing the first, the second. I steadied my breathing then tackled the third. I trailed my finger down his exposed skin, eliciting a sharp intake of breath. I loved that I could do that to him.
He trailed his fingers round my neck and pushed the shoulders of my dress off. The fabric was loose, and as I put my arms to my sides, it just slipped off my body and pooled at my feet. I watched Luke, his eyes growing wider as they flitted across my body. He looked away and took a breath.
“You’re so beautiful. I don’t know where to start.” He brushed my cheek with his knuckle. I finished unbuttoning his shirt. He was straining through his pants. I was desperate to get to what was next. Before I started on his zipper, I palmed him through the tight fabric and he groaned, his hands going to my shoulders.
“Jesus, Ash. I . . .” He moved me toward the bed and pushed me gently back. “Lie down. I want to taste you while I get a grip on myself.”
I lay back on the bed, lifting my bottom to allow him to remove my underwear. He knelt by the bed and held my thighs wide. There was no room for self-consciousness. He knew me better than anyone in my life other than Haven. Him seeing me like this felt totally right.
His tongue seemed to know my body even better than his mind did, and as it circled my clitoris, I was lost. I arched off the bed, and Luke slid his hands under my ass and pulled me toward him, intensifying the pressure, the pleasure. I cried out his name, a prayer; I had no idea. I had lost control over my mind, body and heart.
Nine
Luke
Watching her body shudder with the aftershocks of the orgasm I’d just given her made me feel like a fucking god. She was so perfect. Perfect for me. I’d been an idiot, not seeing it all these years. I think I’d always known, but there had been some kind of invisible barrier keeping me away.
I stood over her, as she recovered from her first orgasm of the evening. I couldn’t wait to get her to the next one. I quickly undressed, my hard-on verging on painful, soothed only by the thought of being inside her.
