by EJ Whitmer
“Who the hell are you!?” I screeched as I furiously backpedalled in the chair, trying to get as far away from the man as possible.
The man’s eyes widened in surprise for a split second before he grimaced and covered his face with his hands. “Damn it!” he grumbled as he slouched into one of Blake’s guest chairs. “Hello, Anna.”
I attempted to shake the confusion out of my head and took a closer look at him. He was relatively tall, probably around six foot. Thin, but muscular like a runner. His golden blonde hair was very well-kept, sporting a Gatsby-style side part. I’d noticed his green eyes and handsome face before he hid them behind his slender fingers. He was clad in only a tight pair of black boxer briefs, black trouser socks and a black, sleeveless undershirt. He was a very attractive man, yes, but after my perusal, I was confident I had never met him before. Therefore, attractive or not, this half-naked man probably needed to be beat over the head with a stapler. Psycho comes in all shapes and sizes.
I cleared my throat, took a deep breath and tried to calm my nerves as I inched toward Blake’s stapler. “How do you know my name?” I asked with much more bravado than I was feeling. “Who are you? Why are you in your underwear?”
The man gave another groan before lifting his gaze to meet mine. “My name is Will. Will Anderson. I’m from Boston. I know your name because I just left a meeting with Emmett Vance and Eric Blake. I was warned you have issues with authority and may not listen to Blake’s instructions to leave his office. I’m not entirely sure I’m allowed to tell you why I’m in my underwear. It would probably be a good idea to call Vance or Blake.”
“They told you I have issues with authority!? Those assholes! I most certainly do not!” I reached for my phone, ignoring the searing pain in my arms. “Oh, I’ll call Blake, alright! You just stay there.” I glanced around the desk, found a manila envelope and tossed it in Will’s lap. “Cover up your business with this.”
Will rolled his eyes, but complied, placing the envelope over his crotch. I nodded once before dialing Blake and turning it on speakerphone.
He answered on the first ring. “Jennings. What a surprise.” He didn’t bother to hide the sarcasm from his voice.
“Why is there a half-naked man in your office?!” I demanded, shooting daggers at Will. “How did he get here? Is he dangerous? Will he hurt me? Why isn’t he clothed? I’ve got a stapler. I’m one hundred percent ready to use it. I’ll staple his gonads to the chair! They’re all but in my face, considering he’s wearing NEXT TO NOTHING!” I screamed the last point as my hysteria built. Will’s ears were now bright red as he crossed his legs and adjusted the envelope over his lap.
“Okay, first off, chill,” Blake commanded with absolutely zero empathy in his voice. “He’s one of the good guys. His name is Will Anderson. He will not hurt you. Do not staple any part of his body to any piece of office furniture. I’ll let him explain exactly how he got there and why he’s nearly naked. There have been some issues here in Boston. Obviously Vance and I aren’t here for conferences. I’ll have to fill you in on the details later. We’ve got a flight back to Chicago this evening. Will is there to meet with the rest of the team to brief them on the situation while Vance and I wait for our flight. I’m asking you as your boss, and more importantly, as your friend, please let Will handle this. Please do not take this as a sign that you’re meant to be involved. Please, Anna.”
I took a deep breath as I eyed Will, who was eyeing me back. “I’ll try,” I conceded.
“Damn it, Anna. Don’t try. Just do it. Step back and let us handle it.” Blake all but growled his frustration over the phone.
“Do you have anything you’d like to say to Will?” I asked. “You’re on speaker. He’s here with me.”
“Yes. Will, there are probably some extra workout clothes in my office closet. Lilith Hines is located on the twenty-sixth floor. She’ll be expecting you. Now, Jennings, listen to me carefully. Do not - ”
I clicked off the phone and set it on the desk in front of me. “Please explain to me how you got here and why you aren’t wearing clothes.”
Will smiled at me, the corners of his green eyes crinkling with amusement, as he stood and made his way over to Blake’s closet. “As you now know, Blake and Vance have booked the soonest flight they could manage. That flight doesn’t leave until this evening. I am able to travel much more quickly than that, so I chose to come ahead of them.” After digging around for a moment, Will found a t-shirt and a pair of athletic shorts and walked back toward the desk.
“Okay … So you have super speed or something? And regular clothes would weigh you down, so you choose to run in your skivvies?” I turned my head to give him privacy while he tugged on the shorts and shirt.
“Not exactly, no. I’m able to transport myself long distances in a manner of seconds. Kind of like on Star Trek. Except I don’t need to be beamed up. I just envision the place I want to teleport to and boom, I’m there. The pictures you took of Blake’s office were sufficient enough for me to send myself here. Unfortunately, I’m not able to transport humans or other objects with me. If I happen to be wearing a garment that clings to my body, that garment will travel with me. Loose-fitting clothing like slacks and button-ups do not make the cut. Consider yourself lucky to have caught me on a day I decided to wear underwear.” Will winked at me and flashed a boyish smile.
“What happened in Boston?” I asked.
Will tilted his head in consideration. “I’m not sure how much I’m allowed to tell you. Obviously, you know enough about my type of people. Not all of us are good, Anna. An extremely bad man recently wreaked havoc on my team in Boston. I am one of two survivors. Blake and Vance traveled to Boston to offer their assistance. We were able to hack the man’s cellphone records and discovered dozens of calls and texts to people in Chicago. I believe he is either here or is on his way here to destroy the team here at Vance Publishing. There’s obviously more to this story. I’ll let Blake fill you in if he’s comfortable doing so. Anna …” Will stepped around the desk and squatted in front of me. “I know you’re frustrated. Blake probably could have been a bit softer with his warning. However, despite his lack of tact, he’s right. This guy took down my team. I watched my friends die at his hands. Please let us handle this.”
Will’s voice was so gentle and sincere, I couldn’t help but relax my shoulders. “I’m so sorry about your friends,” I murmured, reaching out to squeeze his shoulder and wincing at the pain. “I’ll stay out of your way. But do me a favor and teach Blake how to speak to me the way you do. It’s much easier to butt out of the situation when I feel respected.”
Will chuckled as he rose and offered me his hand. “Blake respects you. I’m guessing communication just isn’t his forte where you’re involved.”
I smiled up at him and accepted his outstretched hand, attempting and failing not to wail at the burst of fire in my arms and shoulders.
“You really ought to go home and take a nice hot bath,” Will commented as we made our way out of Blake’s office. “Maybe down a glass of wine and some ibuprofen beforehand.”
I laughed mirthlessly as we reached my office and parted ways. “I’ll consider that. It was nice to meet you, Will. I hope I’ll see you around.”
He flashed his beautiful smile at me and winked. “Same here, Anna. Don’t let those guys push you around too much.” With that, Will sauntered toward the elevators and I returned to my office.
A glance at the clock told me it was past time to pack it up for the night. Will’s advice on taking a hot bath sounded wonderful.
Too bad my tub isn’t deep enough for me to sink in to my neck. I really ought to invest in a hot tub. Except … We have one here at the gym! Bingo!
I raced to my closet and gingerly searched for my swimsuit, cursing my sore body as I sifted through several gym bags full of clothes. I finally located my modest one-piece and rushed out the door. Mae was just shutting down her computer as I passed and I leaned in to let her hug m
e.
“I take it you’re going to sit in the hot tub for a bit?” Mae asked, nodding toward my swim suit.
“Yes, as long as I can get into this suit without passing out from the pain.”
Mae gave me a sympathetic frown as she gathered her purse and walked with me toward the elevator. “Didn’t you get prescribed some muscle relaxers last year after you pulled your groin?”
I groaned and rested my forehead against the wall as we waited. “Yes. Don’t remind me. For a week I walked around looking like I’d ridden a three foot wide horse for too long.”
“Why don’t you call Doctor Thomas and see if he can’t send over another script to the pharmacy?”
I shrugged as we stepped on the elevator. “I’ll see if the office is still open and give him a call when I get to the gym. Worst thing he can say is no. Thanks, Mae.”
The elevator dinged its arrival on the main floor and we both exited, me heading toward the gym and Mae heading toward the parking garage.
7
Forty-five minutes later, I was sufficiently pruned up from one of the most relaxing hot tub experiences I’d ever had. My upper body didn’t exactly feel wonderful, but it was miles ahead of where it was an hour earlier. Taking off my swimsuit wasn’t nearly as much of a struggle as getting into it was.
I was definitely ready for that glass of wine. I hurriedly dried my body and raced back up to my office to retrieve the briefcase I’d forgotten in my haste to get to the hot tub. My floor was dark and silent as I stepped off the elevator. We had just released our latest issue of Tuff Enuff, so the staff was eager to get home at a decent hour before the next deadline snuck up on us again. I made short work of grabbing my briefcase and shutting down my computer before returning to the elevator. The doors were just beginning to shut when I heard a female voice cry out to hold the elevator. A cleaning woman dashed around the corner, narrowly avoiding a collision between her cart and a copier, and sped into the elevator.
“Thank you,” she panted as she straightened her uniform.
“No problem,” I smiled warmly at her and plucked a tiny piece of paper from her hair.
The woman laughed and pressed the button to the twenty-sixth floor. “Thank you again! It’s my first day on the job. I’m running a bit behind.”
“Oh! Well then welcome! And don’t worry about the timing. We’re all pretty relaxed around here. If you’ve already got one floor done by six, I’d say you’re doing great!”
The doors opened on the twenty-sixth floor and the woman dashed out, thanking me one more time over her shoulder. As I watched her rush away, I noticed a light on at the far end of the floor, near Lilith’s office. Being the uber green person I am, I exited the elevator and made my way toward the light, intending to shut it off.
Okay, maybe that’s not entirely true. There was a very small part of me that was curious about why Lilith was at work so late. But it was mostly preserving Mother Earth that pushed me to investigate. Seriously.
As I neared the light, I heard soft voices, one of which I recognized as Lilith’s. Her office door was cracked open a third of the way, allowing me to hear snippets of conversation. I quickly ducked under her assistant’s desk and attempted to calm my beating heart enough to hear what was being discussed. I could now recognize Dom’s voice as well as Will’s, Peter Schultz’s, and Lloyd Vance’s. Peter is Vance Publishing’s I.T. Director and Lloyd is the CEO, as well as Emmett’s father. Will was speaking in a morose tone, filling in the team on the destruction in Boston while someone was clacking away at Lilith’s computer, presumably Peter.
So entranced was I by the top secret conversation that I nearly didn’t feel the tiny tickles running up my shin to my knee. I reached down to itch my leg and ended up curling my fingers around something extremely soft and squishy. I glanced down at my knee and whipped away my hand, covering my mouth in an attempt to quiet my whispered scream.
There on my bent knee was a cute little demon mouse. There was a mouse on my knee. And I had touched this mouse. With my hand. Which was now covering my mouth. I tore my hand off my lips and buried my face in my shirt, attempting to wipe off the thousands of diseases that were probably infesting my facial orifices, all while silently screaming. The damn mouse just sat on my knee staring at me.
I didn’t know what to do. I desperately wanted to know what was going on in Lilith’s office. Freaking out and flinging the rodent across the room would certainly draw attention and ruin my eavesdropping. Ninjas didn’t freak out when faced down by tiny blood-sucking demons with cute little whiskers and twitchy noses. Ninjas focused on the task. I narrowed my eyes at the mouse and raised an eyebrow in silent warning. Because, you know, obviously rodents are able to pick up on human body language. I’ll be damned if the thing didn’t seem to roll his eyes at me before cocking an ear toward Lilith’s office. I took my cue from Mr. Mouse, because clearly I wasn’t of sound mind at the moment, and refocused on the conversation.
“I’m there,” said Peter. “It looks like the majority of his calls have originated near the marinas on the New East Side.”
Perfect. Within a stone’s throw of my condo.
“Maybe he’s renting a houseboat,” offered Will.
The keyboard clacking stopped. “It’s too close to Navy Pier. I’d say it’s more likely he’s shacked up in a yacht or cabin cruiser. There are plenty of hotels, too. Or, honestly, it could just be a coincidence. Either way, I’ll call the marinas and attempt to get lists of their rental clients.”
“Be sure to ask for details on what states the boats are registered under and the length of their rental contracts,” Dom suggested.
“Until you hear back, maybe we should head down there and take a look around,” suggested Lilith.
“I agree,” commented Lloyd Vance. “Can we agree to meet there in, say, thirty minutes at Millennium Park?”
The group murmured their agreement and began to disassemble. I remained under Lilith’s assistant’s desk, mouse on knee, as I weighed my options. On one hand, Will had very nicely asked me to stay out of the situation. On the other hand, I had saved the lives of everyone in the group on more than one occasion. Perhaps one of those times was by accident, but it still counted.
I glanced down at the mouse. “Would it be so bad to just go down there and keep an eye out? I wouldn’t really be butting in. I’d just be observing. Why am I talking to a mouse? Why are you still sitting on me? Eeeeek!” I screeched, finally realizing the disease-infested fluffball was still on my knee, and shook my leg, launching the mouse into the air.
Finally rid of my furry parasite, I scrambled to my feet and bolted to the elevators. As soon as I made it to the parking garage, I whipped out my phone and dialed Carl, who answered on the first ring.
"Tell me you're home," I implored as I hopped into my Mini and peeled out of the garage.
"I am," replied Carl. "What's up? Do I need my super suit!?"
I bit back a groan and resisted pounding my head against the steering wheel. Carl was a little more than gung-ho about the whole superhero thing. He'd somehow found a seamstress to fashion him several spandex super suits complete with capes and spandex briefs. Lucky for me, he'd also had two female super suits made, one of which was still hanging in my closet at home.
"We're just doing some reconnaissance, Carl. No super suit needed."
"I have just the thing in mind," replied an enthusiastic Carl. "Honk when you're here and I'll be out in a jiffy!"
8
Twenty minutes later, I pulled into the parking lot of Carl's bedraggled apartment building and honked my horn twice. Not surprisingly, Carl bounded down the entryway stairs almost immediately. Also not surprisingly, a long black cape flapped in the wind behind him. As he approached my vehicle, I took a moment to digest his latest spandex atrocity. The entire outfit was an odd shade of gray with what looked like flecks of black scattered throughout. A black logo in the shape of an S was screen printed across his chest, symbolizing the superhero
name he gave himself: Stealth. The only pieces breaking up the gray were a black pair of boots, the black cape and a black pair of spandex briefs, stuffed to their capacity with what could only have been socks or a small dishtowel.
Carl launched himself into my Mini and slapped the dash. "Let's roll, baby!"
"Carl … Did you not hear me when I said this was simply a reconnaissance mission? What's with the suit? Would it kill you to just wear some shorts and sneakers?" I backed out of the lot and took off toward Millennium Park.
Carl huffed in outrage as he tried to subtly adjust the socks in his briefs. "This is my urban camouflage suit. Tell me this doesn't look like cement. I'll blend right in!"
