“What’s up?” he asked. “You look upset.”
I shook my head, forcing a smile. “I’m just bummed about the turnout tonight. It doesn’t seem very busy.”
He looked around with his eyebrows raised, then turned back to me with a scoff. “Are you kidding? We might not have people spilling out onto the patio like on the theme nights, but this is still a lot busier than before you came around.”
“Really?” I asked.
“Yeah. This is great. You’ve done wonders, kid. You’re making all the difference.”
Grinning at me, he headed back into the kitchen. That gave me a bit of a boost, but it didn’t last long. I looked up and saw Mason across the bar. He looked at me for only a second before disappearing back into his office. It hurt more than I would have expected it to.
He avoided me for the rest of the night, and I tried hard not to think about it. After all, just like I told Stephanie, it wasn’t like the conversation was the start of anything. Maybe it was the opposite. Maybe we had been holding off on that talk for so long and it left things hanging. Finally talking everything through might have given us the closure we never had.
It was logical, but it didn’t convince me. At the end of the night, the rest of the brothers left while Mason and I stayed behind to close up. He didn’t say a word to me for the first forty minutes. Finally, we were behind the bar cleaning up, and he reached across me to grab a towel.
“Excuse me,” he said in a grumbling tone.
I let out an exasperated sigh and glared at him. “What is your problem?”
He looked at me like he was going to argue, then shook his head. “I just have a massive hangover. That’s all.”
I finished the work in front of me and left without saying anything else.
16
Mason
This was where talking to people got me in trouble. I talked to Tom, and that made things tense. Then I talked to Ava, and it managed to make everything both better and worse. It felt good to talk to her and finally open up about everything. And spending the rest of the get-together laughing and flirting was much better than the awkwardness. But then reality came back.
Now I was being weird toward Ava, and she definitely noticed. I was trying to stop it. Things really had gotten so much better between us after our conversation. But, in a way, that made it even weirder. Because as soon as I saw her again, I realized a wall between us had come down. And I’d promised Tom I’d stay professional. It was the one thing he’d asked me, the one thing he insisted on.
I’d made that promise to my older brother with all seriousness, and I fully intended to uphold it. It was just that I’d made it before Ava and I had our conversation. Now things were different between us. But I didn’t know how to explain it to her.
It wasn’t just about the awkwardness of admitting my brothers and I were talking about her behind her back. That could get uncomfortable really fast, but it was more than that. At this point, I didn’t even know how Ava was feeling about the situation. That made a major difference in how the conversation could go.
I didn’t want to hurt her. If she was having feelings for me again and thinking about us getting back together, telling her nothing could happen between us while she was working for me could be painful for her. I didn’t want to embarrass her or make her feel like she didn’t matter to me. I also didn’t want her to feel like I was somehow using her or taking advantage of our past with her working at the bar.
At the same time, that reaction was completely dependent on her feeling that way about me. It was entirely possible she saw our conversation at the barbecue at her parents’ house as a way for us to smooth over the past and move forward. I didn’t want to make a fool out of myself by assuming she would want me back when she wasn’t at that place at all.
I couldn’t even imagine how unpleasant that would be. If it seemed like things were weird between us now, trying to let her down easy when she didn’t need to be let down at all would bring it to a whole new level. Then we would have to keep working together, and that would be just miserable. thinking about the whole thing and all the different ways it could go poorly was giving me a headache and made it impossible for me to decide what I was supposed to do next. Which just resulted in me pretty much ignoring her.
I tried to convince myself that was a good tactic. If I just didn’t give myself the opportunity to be alone with her, then I wouldn’t have to deal with the situation either way. I could just keep up with the avoidance until I figured out how I was going to handle it clearly. That was the mature and adult thing to do and couldn’t possibly go wrong in any way. Denial certainly had its appeal sometimes.
Of course, that appeal went out the window when it came to actual execution of the plan. Skating around Ava wasn’t easy, and there was no way to do it without it being obvious. It shouldn’t have been a surprise that by the end of the night, she’d had enough of my bullshit and called me out for it.
Therein lay the downfall of my plan. I didn’t account for my brothers leaving me alone to do the closing work for the night. And I didn’t expect Ava to stick around to help. I was caught, and there was nothing I could do. Well, there was something I could do. I could have explained to her how I was feeling and the promise I made to Tom.
Especially after she brought up how I was acting and asked what was wrong with me, it would have been the perfect opportunity to clear the air and get us both on the same page. Of course, I didn’t take it. I punked out and used a lame excuse about having a hangover. It wasn’t a complete lie. All the drinking at the barbecue had caught up with me and there was a dull ache behind my eyes all day. But it wasn’t enough to warrant the way I was acting.
By the next day, things weren’t better. Ava had gone on the defensive. Rather than letting me ignore her, she took the initiative of ignoring me first. It should have been easier that way, but it wasn’t. I hated how it seemed so natural to her to just not say anything to me or even look my way.
It was a relief when halfway through the night, Brian came through the door. He looked around, obviously impressed by how much more business we had, and came up to the bar. He was smiling when he approached, but the expression turned to concern when he was a few steps away.
“You doing okay?” he asked.
I looked over at Matt, who was currently playing the role of human wall between Ava and me. “Keep an eye on the bar for a bit,” I said. “I’m going to have a drink and grab a bite with Brian.”
Matt nodded, and I went over to the kitchen to call an order for some snacks back to Jesse before heading over to one of the tables with Brian with two mugs of beer. I set one in front of him and let out a sigh as I dropped down into the other side of the booth.
“Boy, am I glad to see you,” I said.
My best friend took a sip of the beer and nodded as he set the mug back down on the table. “What’s going on with you?”
The table I chose was far enough away from the bar that Ava wouldn’t be able to hear what we were saying, even if she was trying to listen in.
“My brain is in about a thousand different places,” I said. “Actually, it’s in two. With Ava and away from Ava.”
“Why do you say that? What’s going on?” he asked. “I thought you said things were going okay with the two of you. Business looks like it’s doing great, too.”
“Business is doing great, and that’s kind of the problem.”
“I don’t understand,” Brian said.
“Ava and I finally sat down and had a real conversation the other day. We never talked about why she left or why she never came home. But the other night we got a chance to really put it all out there. She told me the reason she left was that losing the baby was so hard on her and she didn’t know how to deal with it. Of course, I can completely understand that. It was hard on me, too. Neither one of us handled that whole situation well.”
I told him about the whole conversation and everything that came up. Brian listened quiet
ly, making his way through his beer as he did. When I was finished, he didn’t hesitate. He looked me right in the eye and asked the question that was at the root of all this.
“Do you think the two of you are going to get back together?”
I sagged against the back of the seat and waited while Jesse came up to the table and set our food down. He eyed me suspiciously but didn’t ask any questions. He probably figured he would hear about it all soon enough anyway.
“We can’t,” I said. I figured the simplest answer was the easiest rather than trying to go into any deep exploration of the emotions right off the bat. After all, it wasn’t really emotions that were making the situation complicated.
“You can’t?” he asked. “What do you mean?”
“I made a promise to Tom. When I told him Ava was the one I hired to help out around the bar and that things were going so well, he made me promise I wouldn’t try anything with her. That nothing would happen between us while she was working here.”
Brian looked around, exaggerating the movements of his head as he swept his eyes around the bar. “Do you see Tom anywhere around?”
I let out a short laugh but shook my head again. “You don’t get it. I see Tom everywhere.”
“That’s a bit concerning. Maybe you should talk to somebody about that,” he said.
“Not like that. I mean he’s the one who bought this place. He is the reason it even exists. So, he’s always around.”
“And he always will be,” Brian said. “You’re not going to change that. Tom wouldn’t put your parents at risk because his brother decided to have a relationship. His grown-ass brother, by the way. You’re an adult who wants a relationship with another adult. He’s not going to have a fit over that. And if he does, that’s his issue and he’ll get over it.”
“I don’t know about that,” I said.
“Look, you work hard. Too hard. You do everything for everybody else. He doesn’t have any room to begrudge you having a relationship. Especially one that is as perfect for you as Ava is.”
Brian was right. I understood where Tom was coming from not wanting it to have my personal life interfere with the bar. But I couldn’t just let him completely control my life that way. Not when it came to something as important as Ava and how I felt about her. Besides, he was never around. He didn’t have to know. Not until I was sure things were solid with her. Then, I would deal with it from there.
“Thanks for opening my eyes,” I said. “You’re right.”
Brian grinned. “So, you’re going to go for it? When?”
I took one last sip of my beer and wiped my hands on a napkin. “Right now.”
I headed for the bar. Walking behind it, I took Ava’s wrist and gently pulled her over to the side with me.
“Mason?” she said, sounding confused. “What’s going on?”
“Will you go on a date with me?” I asked.
She blinked a couple of times, looking even more confused before she finally answered. “I… sure.”
Her voice sounded apprehensive, and I took a very slight step forward, wanting to be closer to her but not intimidate her.
“I know I’ve been weird, but that’s done. I’m done not going after what I want,” I said.
She nodded and offered a hint of a smile. “How about lunch tomorrow before work?”
I smiled back. “Sounds perfect.”
17
Ava
I woke up already nervous. Why was I so nervous? It wasn’t like this was the first time I went on a date with Mason. Our first date was years and years ago. I was much younger then. Much more naive about the world, and yet I wasn’t anywhere near as nervous as I was that morning. All I could think about was how excited I was to see Mason.
At least that stayed the same. Despite the entire flock of butterflies that had apparently taken up residence in my stomach, I was also really looking forward to spending time with him outside of work.
I couldn’t wait, and yet I also kind of wanted to fake a stomachache and hide under the covers for the rest of the day. What if it didn’t go well? What if we both had this idea of what we used to be and what we could be again, but when we tried, we discovered that was all behind us?
I could have just continued working with him at the bar and convinced myself not to think about anything else. It wasn’t easy, but I could do it. That wasn’t an option anymore after today. Going on this lunch together was drawing a line in the sand. Either we would discover there was still something there for us, or I was going to have to potentially revisit that whole working at the fast-food restaurant plan.
My phone rang right as I was getting out of the shower. I thought it might be Mason, and for a second, worry flickered through me that he was going to be the one to spontaneously come up with some sort of ailment that would stop him from coming to lunch. But I saw Stephanie’s name on the screen instead, and I dropped down to the edge of the bed to answer it.
“Hello?” I said.
“Stop it,” Stephanie says
“What?” I asked, startled. “Stop what?”
“Stop questioning whether you should go on your date with Mason this afternoon. Stop second-guessing everything. Stop dwelling on everything. Stop freaking yourself right the hell out. Just, in general, stop it.”
I drew in a breath. “Thank you. You are a good friend.”
“Tell me all about it when it’s done,” she said suddenly in a singsong voice and hung up.
Given a boost by my pep talk from Stephanie, I got dressed and headed for the restaurant Mason invited me to the night before. Just sitting outside it before going in made my heart beat a little faster. This was our old spot, where we came for lunch together all the time when we were younger. It was after one of those dates that we had our first kiss.
His truck pulled up beside me, and Mason climbed out. He leaned down to smile into my window, and I opened the door.
“Hey,” he said, reaching in to take my hand and help me out.
“Hi,” I said.
He kept his fingers linked lightly around mine as we walked into the restaurant and sat down on our old table. Mason reached across the table with both hands, and I rested mine in them.
“I’ve missed you, Ava,” he said.
“I’ve missed you, too, Mason.”
That seemed to take away all the anxiety. We relaxed into the time together, talking about memories and the time we spent together. It felt like old times, just going right back into our comfortable pattern.
After lunch, we drove to work and spent the evening in what felt like an easy, natural flow. We smiled and flirted, stealing glances and little touches. Well before it was closing time, I knew I didn’t want our night together to end. So, when Mason offered to drive me home, I accepted.
It didn’t matter that I had my own car at the bar. It didn’t matter that his brothers saw us walk out together. I just wanted to be with him.
We got to my apartment, and Mason walked me up to the door. I turned and leaned back against it.
“Want to come in for a nightcap?” I asked.
He grinned at me and nodded. I unlocked the door and walked inside. The instant the door was closed, all the time along together and our flirting bubbled over. He wrapped his arms around my waist and pulled me back toward him, turning me around.
I leapt into his arms and wrapped my legs around his waist. His mouth crushed down on mine in an intense, powerful kiss. He walked me into the bedroom, and I shut the door behind him.
Our tongues tangled in each other’s mouths as he walked to the bed, effortlessly carrying me while I ran my fingers along the familiar and yet exotic muscles of his shoulders. I wanted to feel his skin pressed against mine, to feel his warm breath on me. As we reached the bed, he let me go, letting me tumble out of his arms and onto the mattress with a bounce. I giggled as I hit and kicked my legs out in front of me. He wasted no time bending down into me to lay his lips upon mine and rip at his own shirt. As it tore, but
tons flying into the air beside us, a thrill ran up my spine at the animalistic determination in his movements.
I pulled at the bottom of my shirt, flinging it over my head and to the ground. It had less impact than the ripping buttons, but it still elicited a groan from deep in Mason’s chest as my breasts tumbled out. Immediately, he took one into his hand, pressing his lips into mine again and kneading my flesh. Ravenously, he moved his lips to my neck and down to my collarbone, and I leaned my head back to give him greater access. Pushing me back until I lay down with the force of his kisses, he moved down the center of my chest until he took the breast into his mouth, tongue flickering on my nipple.
Gasping, I filled my fingers with his hair and concentrated on the warmth of his wet tongue on my skin. The brush of his five o’clock shadow against the softness of my breast, the strong, sure movements of his tongue as it lapped at my sensitive, taut and perky nipple. His fingers ran down to the waistband of my pants and pulled, and I lifted my ass to let him pull them off unceremoniously. When they were pooled at my feet, he let go of my chest to yank them off and toss them away and then stopped. His eyes ran over my body appreciatively, and I smiled back up at him, reveling in the gaze, the worship in his eyes. He took in my naked body as if I were a painting in a museum, with the awe of artistry. In that moment I felt sexy and desired, and my core burned for him.
Methodically, as if the need for speed had vanished and was replaced by an intense, driving heat, he unbuckled his belt and opened his pants, letting them fall from his hips. The bulge of his cock in the boxers was thick and straining against the fabric. I sat up and kissed the hardened muscles around his belly button, letting my tongue linger in the ridges while my hands slipped under the waistband. It was my turn to disrobe him, and I pulled down slowly, letting my mouth trail it by following the thin line of hair from his stomach to his shaft.
Second Chance Baby Page 10
