“Come on,” Janie said, lifting Dean to his feet and helping him to the bathroom in his office. “I’ll clean you up.”
Dean grinned at her, his head lolling forward. “I just get a little dizzy sometimes,” he mumbled. “I don’t like the sight of blood.”
“Really?” Janie asked, skeptical. “You were just fine with my blood.”
Dean shrugged and didn’t argue anymore, knowing that she had caught him. He just didn’t want her to make a fuss over him, but that was just too bad.
“Stay still,” Janie said, filling a glass of water and handing it to Dean. “Drink this while I clean this out. We should probably go to the hospital and stitch you up properly.”
“Pfft,” Dean said. “I’m not leaving my office unattended after that!”
Janie sighed. She wouldn’t be able to make him do anything against his will, so she would just have to try to do her best to help him now.
“I never knew being with somebody could be so dangerous,” Janie sighed.
Dean laughed and winced in pain. “It’s a dream. I’m a dream come true.”
Janie shook her head and they stayed quiet as she finished cleaning out his wound and bandaging it.
“You’re going to need to take it easy for a while,” Janie said. Suddenly, an overwhelming surge of nausea struck her and she backed away from Dean just in time to throw up into the toilet. He chuckled heartily.
“Looks like I’m not the only one who has trouble with the sight of blood.”
Janie froze. She could tell him the truth now. But how would he react? There was no way of telling what might happen if she confessed. Not only would she be in trouble with the other shifters in Stonybrooke, but it would make Kiera’s case against Dean unimaginably more colorful to the tabloids. They could get rid of the photos, but they couldn’t get rid of a child.
“I guess we all have our weaknesses,” Janie said, deciding that there was no way she would be able to admit her pregnancy to Dean. Besides, it wasn’t for sure yet. Although she knew from the signs and symptoms she had read about long ago that she was probably with a child of the shifter variety. The symptoms were going to set on fast after the first week, and before long, she would be delivering a beautiful child.
But that wasn’t the issue. The issue was what the bear shifters might do to her if they knew she was pregnant with a shifter pup, or pups, as it were. There were often more than one child in a litter. There was also the issue of what Kiera might do to Dean’s reputation if Janie gave birth to Dean’s child.
There was no good that might come of her pregnancy. Nothing she did would keep the child or Dean safe except keeping this to herself. She just hoped she would be able to plan a safe escape before it became too obvious that she was hiding something.
“What’s wrong?” Dean asked, standing painfully from the counter where he had perched himself so that Janie could work on him.
Janie couldn’t bring herself to answer, and tears welled up in her eyes.
“Hey, don’t you worry about a thing,” Dean said, pulling her close into a warm, comforting hug. She laid her head against Dean’s broad chest, and allowed him to comfort her for what might just be the last time.
She would do anything to protect Dean and make sure she delivered his child safely. But that meant she was going to have to make some hard choices, and fast. If shifter biology had anything to say about it, then she didn’t have much time.
15.
“Thanks,” Dean said, taking the stack of papers that Janie had collected from the floor. The bear shifters had been working extra hard to make a mess as they rummaged through his things. Good thing he never kept anything important at work. They would just have to try harder next time they wanted to keep him down.
“Are you going to be okay? That cut is really deep.”
Janie’s beautiful face was filled with concern, and Dean took it into his hands and kissed her on the forehead. She seemed to be very upset, almost to the point of tears. The whole thing must have been very scary for her, so he couldn’t blame her for feeling a little bit emotional. He might just feel the same way himself if he were in her shoes. Kiera could be a huge bitch when she wanted to be, which was often. Especially concerning the divorce, apparently.
“I’m fine! You really have nothing to worry about. Shifters heal pretty quick. We’re miracles of nature, they say.”
He winked at Janie, but it still didn’t bring the easy smile he loved so much to her lips. He was starting to really miss that smile.
“Seriously, it’s going to be all right. Nothing Kiera said can change the fact that we’re going to get through these obstacles one way or another. It’s going to be just fine, I promise.”
“Yeah, but…”
Janie cut her words off quickly and Dean furrowed his brow in confusion. What was she so upset about?
“Why don’t you take the day off?” Dean said with a heavy sigh. “Everything has been a little bit ridiculous lately, and I know you wanted to come in and be a big help, but look at us. We’re both hurt and tensions are high. Maybe it would do you some good to go home and relax. You can unpack your boxes and get settled in. That might help you start feeling a little better about all of this. It’s always nice to get a fresh start!”
“Maybe,” Janie said, but her tone was doubtful.
Dean watched her walk away, a frown tugging at his lips. Something was going on, but she wasn’t going to talk to him about it. It was probably just a Kiera overload. Lord knew he’d had his fill of her for the next century. And they’d only seen each other two days in a row. He imagined his personal hell might be a crowded hall full of Kieras.
“Well, either way, sleep helps everything. Why don’t you go and get some rest then? It will put things in perspective for you.”
“Yeah…I think perspective is important,” Janie said with a quiet sigh. For some reason, the sentence had a ring of foreboding to it and Dean studied Janie closely. What might she be thinking? It was odd for her to be acting this way. Most of the time, she was the one trying to get him to look on the bright side.
“Good,” Dean said, suddenly feeling a little bit insecure. “I guess that means you will be needing a ride back.”
Dean pulled out his cell phone and started dialing the number for his limo driver, but Janie shook her head.
“I was thinking about taking a walk. Might help to clear my head. But thank you for the offer. I hope you feel better soon. If it gets red and inflamed please go see a real doctor. All I did was patch you up a little. You might need something more.”
“All right,” Dean said. “I promise.”
Janie nodded, and some of the worried tension left her face before she let herself out of the room.
He was worried about Janie, and almost followed her out of the room, but the phone rang suddenly.
“Yeah?”
“Mr. Resner! Do you have any comments about the-”
Dean slammed the phone back on the receiver and cursed. He had lost his temper and brought all of this onto himself. No wonder Janie was feeling upset. Her image was on the cover of every tabloid paper in the city, and everybody in Stonybrooke was quickly going to learn the story that the tabloids were trying to tell. Scandal, treachery, or bravery?
Sure, nobody read the tabloids to get the facts straight, but rumors were always a pleasant way to spend the time. Everyone wanted to get the latest gossip and feel as if they were keeping up with the stories of the people that they had a perverse fixation on.
Dean obviously had more than his fair share of people with a fixation on him. And so, for better or for worse, they wanted to see him at his extremes. See how he reacted to scandal, to failure, and to success. But mostly, people were interested in the failure part.
“Fuck this,” Dean growled. He would almost rather the tabloids dig up his murky past, running around with gangs of human-wolf hybrid kids who didn’t feel like they had a place in the world; vandalizing and terrorizing people because i
t made him feel important to be able to get a reaction, any reaction, from somebody else. He had been sorely lacking in parental guidance when he was a kid, just like those kids on the team that Janie had attempted to set him up with.
In fact, it was likely that some of those very kids might be offspring of the same thugs he had run with when he was younger and looking for some kind of meaning to his life. Somebody who might recognize him and say that he had power.
It wasn’t until Maurice had taken him aside and told him that he had potential, and that if he wanted to, he could work in the diner, that Dean realized he could be noticed for something a hell of a lot more important than smoking cigarettes in front of a billboard or spray-painting graffiti on the lawn of his principal. He could do something with his life. He could earn money. And, if he wanted, he could play football.
That’s when his life had taken a turn for the better, but not before he had already done a whole variety of things that he regretted. His miserable past was an open book as far as he was concerned, if the tabloids would have just left Janie out of it. She was an innocent in all of this. She hadn’t asked to go on some extravagant date at a restaurant he’d inadvertently shared with his ex-wife. She’d simply wanted to talk to him.
Now look at them. Janie was at home with her tail between her legs, frightened and miserable, and it was all his fault. Why didn’t he ever know how to deal with relationships properly? It was unfair for people to expect him to know how to treat others when he had never been treated with love, kindness, or respect. At least not until he had been drafted. Then he got a whole lot of artificial love, sycophantic kindness, and a tiny iota of respect.
That wasn’t the kind of thing he could live off, though. He was going to have to work harder than he ever had before to bring his company back to the height of its power. He had done everything he could to do things right once he had realized that life was what he made of it and he alone. He wasn’t going to let a crazy bitch like Kiera get in the way. No. He was going to play it exactly as Janie had told him. He was going to succeed, no matter what.
16.
Janie sat quietly on the loveseat in her living room, her shirt pulled up to her breasts. She was looking down at her swollen belly, touching it gingerly and tracing the little purple line that had started to spring from her navel. She was beginning to see another one forming as well, and guessed that soon, her belly button would look much like a ray of sunshine blazing through the soft plains of her stomach.
“Why now?” she asked the little one growing in her belly. “Couldn’t this have waited until we were all ready?”
Her stomach cramped slightly as if in response to the question, and Janie sighed. “I know you would be so much happier here, but it’s dangerous. I don’t think we should stay here any longer. Your daddy and I have both been hurt. It isn’t safe.”
She expected the baby inside to move or kick at her or something, find some way to protest its confinement to her stomach and dependence on her poor decision making skills, but this time, nothing happened.
Ever since she’d gotten home, Janie had been surfing the internet and reading about all the horrific things that the bear shifters had done during the war. It was a miracle that any of the wolf pups had survived the onslaught, and she had a new appreciation for the settlement of Stonybrooke.
In this town lay the Serah stone, one of the most important shifter artifacts. It was a beautiful stone, safely tucked away and hidden from the rest of the world. Its significance was vague, but rumor had it that the shifters in possession of the stone would one day rule the free world. It was no wonder the bear shifters had been so adamant on destroying the wolf pups.
And, as she was beginning to see, they were still adamant about it. But why would they want to go through Howlers Incorporated? Was it because they were threatened by the message of peace and integration that Dean was trying to bring to the world? If so, that made the bear shifters even more despicable than she had originally thought. If they were so elitist that they thought only bear shifters were worth a damn, then what would happen if they ever got their hands on the Serah stone? The thought was chilling.
A sudden rumble from her stomach broke Janie out of her thoughts and she laughed. “All right, all right. What will we be having this time?”
Janie’s eyes widened as an abrupt craving for steak and broccoli overwhelmed her.
“You’re not going to be a picky child, are you?” she asked down to her belly.
But, of course, there was no answer, and she made her way to the kitchen. If she didn’t get out of Stonybrooke soon, there was a high likelihood that she might not ever get to find out what kind of child she was going to have. Not only would Kiera and the bear shifters take over Dean’s company and whatever resources he commanded, but they would go after any of the pups slated to be born. Especially, she knew, one that belonged to Dean himself.
Janie worked quickly to make her meal, her anxiety mounting. It would be increasingly unsafe to stay in Stonybrook. Wolf shifters could sense these kinds of things. Everything had been so chaotic since it had happened that Dean was none the wiser. And it tore her apart not to be able to share with him what, to her, was completely joyous news. She had been falling deeply in love with Dean, and the idea of their being able to start a family together filled her with such joy.
But the sad truth of the matter was, it would only put everyone she loved, Dean, the baby, and even herself, in danger. She wanted to tell him. In fact, as soon as she finished cooking, she went to her phone and reached out to it, wishing for nothing more than to hear his voice again and tell him everything that was on her mind. But something stopped her. The ball and chain of responsibility. She would be responsible if something happened to him, or to his company, if anybody found out about her pregnancy. And she couldn’t stand by and just let that happen.
“I think I’m going to have to do it, little one,” Janie said, stroking her belly lovingly. “I’m going to have to pack everything up and go back to California. There’s no other choice.”
It tore her up to even think it, but what was worse, in her imagination and in reality, was the idea that she would be the one who was to blame if anything worse happened to Dean, or the child they had conceived together.
No matter how much she wanted a beautiful, happy family together with that man, it just wasn’t meant to be.
It was probably for the best, anyway. He had a huge reputation as being a player. Who knew when he would lose interest in her and drop her like he had so many other women over the years? Especially if she was pregnant. Everything happened for a reason, Janie decided, and she was just going to have to buck up and do what had to be done. Whether she liked it or not.
***
“Janie! Good to hear from you. I have been worried.”
The sound of Dean’s voice had a confusing effect on her body. She felt an immediate sense of longing, but also a twinge of nausea, a pang of anguish, and what was that other thing? Anger maybe?
But why would she be angry at him? It wasn’t his fault that they were stuck in this shitty situation together. They were just going to have to get through it one step at a time.
“I called to tell you that I quit. I can’t do this anymore.”
It had taken everything she had to force herself to say it out loud, especially to Dean. Knowing he was on the other side of the line made her want to break down and cry right there and then, but what would become of her if she did that? Being a big, blubbering mess was never the way to solve a difficult problem. In fact, it would only complicate matters. She was sure of it. If she cried, she would probably confess why in a moment of weakness. She couldn’t be weak. Not with Dean. Not ever.
“You’re quitting?” Dean said, obviously taken aback. Janie was so glad she didn’t have to see his face as he said the words out loud.
“Yes,” Janie said, sighing deeply. She squeezed her eyes closed and stroked the mound of her stomach. It had gotten even bigger ove
r the course of the night. She knew that without the same distractions as the day before, she would quickly be found out.
“But why? I thought you were happy here!” Dean was quiet for a moment before he resumed speaking. “Actually, I’m not that surprised. You have been through a lot this week. I know my ex is kind of a psychopath. She shouldn’t have done those things to you. I shouldn’t have let her do those things…but that doesn’t mean you should quit. This is the career path you were destined for. Please, reconsider.”
But Janie had done all the considering she’d needed to do, and then some. In fact, she had hardly slept at wink the night before, getting up time and again during the night to phone friends and make plans, surfing the internet about ways to protect herself from malicious bear shifters and other things that might threaten herself and the baby she was carrying.
“Dean, please just trust me on this. If I was meant to be working with you in this company, don’t you think it would have been easier for me to do so? We didn’t even get to make it out to the city to meet the football team. I’m sure you can do this without me.”
“I’m sorry you feel that way,” Dean said, bitter disappointment thick in his voice. “I guess I had pegged you a little differently. You didn’t seem like a quitter to me when I hired you.”
“That was before…”
“Look, I know the tabloid headline is embarrassing, but we can move past that! It’s not like they’re saying we slept together or anything. I mean, it’s implied, but that’s not any reason to be upset.”
Janie grimaced, her conversation with Kiera replaying in her head. If she didn’t leave, worse conversations were sure to come, and Dean’s reputation would be impossible to protect.
“I don’t want to be with the kind of man who will keep me center stage, Dean. I am not the kind of person cut out for that kind of media attention. I’m sorry, I really and truly am, but that just isn’t the life I imagined for myself.”
HAMMER (Forsaken Riders MC Romance Book 16) Page 108