Then he leaned in and kissed me, thrusting one last time, both of us coming undone. And I couldn’t help it. I fucking cried when we came.
As soon as it happened, I shook my head, and pushed him away. “I can’t. I can’t,” I gasped.
Immediately, he pulled back then gathered me in his arms, placing me so I was sitting across his lap, curled against his chest. “It’s all right, doll. Shhh. I’ve got you. I’ve got you. You don’t need to fight anymore. Let it go.”
“This is too much. You’re too much.”
“I know,” he whispered. “I know.”
I pushed against him a little, but honestly, there wasn’t much fight left in me. I was exhausted, going through life scrambling and scrounging, hoping to make it just one more day. I’d wanted it over more times than I could count, and now that it was, my emotions were all over the fucking place.
“I’m not perfect,” Kristian said as he rocked me gently within his giant body. “And I can’t promise you that this thing we’ve got going on will be any sort of easy. I’m gonna piss you off, and you’re gonna piss me off too. But that’s OK, because I have no intention of ever sending you away, so you don’t need to run. You have somewhere to live. You have a family who’s always gonna give a shit. And you have me.” He hooked his finger underneath my chin and lifted. “It took one day with you, and I was already gone. A week having you, and I’m never letting go. You got me?”
“Yeah.” A smile crept across my face, just before more tears filled my eyes. “Fuck,” I said as they splashed down my cheeks. “My eyes are leaking. You broke my eyes.”
“Oh doll,” he said with a chuckle as he gathered me closer, and I cried into his chest. It was the first time I had cried properly in so long that I couldn’t seem to stop. “Marrying me can’t be that bad, can it?”
I shook my head. I wasn’t a stranger to jumping into situations with both feet, but I was a stranger to feeling wanted. I was a stranger to having hope. But fuck, if it didn’t feel good to have those things. “Does this mean I get a ring?“ I sniffed, wiping my eyes as I looked up at him.
Placing his hands on either side of my head, he brushed my hair away from my face and smiled. “I’ll take you shopping for one tomorrow. You can pick whatever you like.”
“You might regret saying that,” I said with a smile.”
“You know, I don’t regret a single thing in my life so far. Something tells me I’m not gonna regret you either.” I could only hope to live up to that claim, but I wasn’t sure I had it in me to not end up being a regret. But fuck it. I was going to try because this felt worth it. I’d run away out of fear and been brought back and welcomed with open arms. This felt real to me, and I was going to do everything I could to be the best me I was capable of.
I just hoped it was enough. Hoped I was enough.
Chapter Seventeen
Battle Cat
“Wake up,” Kristian whispered while nuzzling my neck. I groaned and kept my eyes closed, causing him to laugh. “Come on, sleepyhead, wake up.”
“I can’t.” As much as I loved fucking him, my body literally couldn’t take any more. He’d fucked me into exhaustion.
“You have to. I want to show you something really cool.”
“Is it your cock?”
An amused chuckle bounced his chest. “No, doll. It’s not my cock.”
“Then what?” I groaned as he pulled me to sitting.
“It’s a surprise. But you have to get ready quick or we might miss it.” He started handing me clothes and helping me get them on my sleep-heavy body.
“You could show me a few hours of sleep. I’d like that.”
Grinning, he kissed me on the temple. “You’ll like this too. Come on.”
He pulled me out of the bedroom and held his finger up for me to be quiet so I didn’t wake up the others. We’d all spent the night at Jasmine’s place, which seemed to be tradition whilst the family was planning a job.
Hand in hand, Kristian and I crept down the stairs and through to the kitchen where he handed me a thermos of coffee.
“You’ve already been up to make this?” I whispered, clicking the mouthpiece open and taking a sip.
“Yeah. I was gonna go surfing while you slept in.”
“Why didn’t you go?”
He grinned again, the boyishness I loved about him showing through. “You’ll see.”
I harassed him a little more as we climbed into the Ute and drove the short distance to Bells Beach. “You brought me to the beach you banned me from surfing?” I asked.
“Consider this your official invitation back,” he said, unbuckling his seatbelt and jumping out of the car. He jogged around to my side and pulled open my door faster than I could myself. He was definitely eager about something. “Hurry.”
“OK, OK,” I said, taking his offered hand as I got out and he pulled me towards the wooden stairs. “What’s going on down there?” I asked, noting the small crowd of people gathered on the beach below. They were all looking out to the water and pointing.
“Out there,” he said, pointing to the water like the rest of them. There was a big splash and suddenly a cheer went up.
I beamed. “Dolphins.”
With his eyes dancing with excitement, Kristian nodded and hurried me down the rest of the stairs. “I was checking the surf report when this popped up. At first they thought sharks, but then they realised it’s a whole pod of dolphins playing.”
There had to be at least twenty of them putting on a show and leaping out of the water, flapping their fins and tails, lifting their heads like they were laughing. A couple of surfers were still out there, and so was a dog! It was an amazing sight.
Joining the gathered group at the water’s edge, Kristian stood behind me and wrapped his arms around my shoulders as we smiled and watched, hooting and hollering with each leap.
“They’re so beautiful,” I exclaimed, my cheeks hurting from smiling so much.
“Worth getting out of bed for?”
“Definitely.” I turned to look up at him and meet his eyes. “Thank you for including me.”
He brushed his fingers through my windswept hair and secured it behind my ear. “Always, doll. You were my first thought.” Then he brought his mouth to mine, and I twisted my body in his arms so I could press against him chest to chest. God, I loved kissing him. I loved being in his arms and just generally being around him. His first thought was me. I’d never been someone’s first thought before. It was something I’d have to get used to, but definitely something I liked.
“What is this?” a familiar voice said from a few feet away. Kristian released me and turned to find Nate, Toby, Alesha, and Sam. They were all in wetsuits, their hair wet obviously from getting out of the water not long before.
“Dolphins,” I said, gesturing towards the water.
“Oh wow,” Alesha said, taking Sam by the hand and walking closer to the shoreline.
“How long has this been going on,” Toby asked, staying beside us while Nate joined the other two.
“About thirty minutes. I didn’t realise you were all up and out of the house already,” Kristian said.
“We went to Winkipop. Didn’t want to disturb the newly engaged couple, so we left you both sleeping,” Toby replied, quirking his brow.
“Where’s Abs then?” Kristian asked. “It’s not like him to skip a morning surf.”
“He’s gone back to the shack to grab some shit since we’re staying with Jazz until this job is done.”
Kristian’s brow furrowed as he nodded. “Reckon you can take Ronnie back to the house for me? I wanna have a talk with him alone.”
Toby nodded once. “No problem.”
Kristian leaned down and kissed my forehead. “Stay with Tobes. I’ll come back to take you ring shopping a bit later, OK?”
“Sure,” I said, feeling a little disappointed that he was handing me off so fast. We’d just had a moment where he said I was the first thing he thought about
, and now he was racing off to have secret conversations with his brother, who’d been an absolute arse for most of the time I’d known him. I knew they had some shit to sort out, but I’d hoped after the craziness of yesterday that Kristian and I could spend today just being us.
“You seen anything like this before?” Toby asked as Kristian jogged up the beach. I watched him until he hit the stairs.
“Like what?” I asked distractedly.
“This many dolphins. I’ve lived here all my life and I’ve never seen this many in one place.”
“Must be a lot of fish there,” I said, my eyes still straying back to Kristian’s receding figure.
“He’ll be back, you know.”
“I know,” I said, even though I had this terrible feeling twisting at my stomach. Call me crazy, call me high-strung. But, I hadn’t had a great track record with men sticking around. All of them said the right things in the beginning, but their actions ended up telling a different story.
“They’re twins, Ronnie,” Toby said as if reading my thoughts and knowing I needed reassurance. “For thirty-three years, they’ve been two sides of the same coin. I know you need him, but they need each other too. Do you get what I’m saying?”
Swallowing my misplaced jealousy down as far as I could, I focused on Toby’s face. “I get it,” I said. “I’m just…I’m not used to all this.”
“I know.” He put his arm around my shoulders and pulled me in. I stiffened for a moment, then he gave me a friendly squeeze, and I relaxed against his side. “Family isn’t always easy, especially when you aren’t used to having it. It takes work to keep this many people functioning well together. But, we do it because this is bigger than any one of us. No matter our differences, we’re all committed to the job, and we’re all committed to each other. Which means we’re here for you too. You’re one of us now, Ronnie. OK?”
I had to swallow again, but this time from emotion. Then I took a deep breath. “OK,” I said, hoping to hell I could believe him. God, they gave good speeches. I so badly wanted to whole-heartedly believe everything they said to me. Only time would tell if their actions aligned with their words.
Toby smiled then released his hold. “Good. Then let’s go join the others. See if we can get you and Leesh talking. I think you’d really get along.”
“I need you to stay out here,” I said to Kristian as we pulled up outside Maree and Dazza’s. As promised, he’d returned with Abbot only a couple of hours later, breezing into Jasmine’s place like they were the best of friends, which was interesting to me because I hadn’t seen them that at ease together since watching them at the wedding. It seemed they had come to an understanding. And in a move that chased some of my demons away, the first thing Kristian did was plonk himself on the couch beside me and haul me onto his lap, kissing me like he’d just returned from war. What a way to make a girl feel special.
Before we could go and choose my engagement ring, we decided it was best to do our part for the backup plan first. That involved a little grovelling to Maree and Dazza on my part. As a peace offering, I had a case of beer, a cask of wine, and a carton of cigarettes sitting on my lap.
“What if they decide to get you back for turning Dazza into Castle Grayskull yesterday?” Kristian asked as he looked toward the small house.
“I don’t know. I’m hoping the years I’ve known them and the gifts will count for something.”
“Well, if they don’t go for it and you’re in trouble, call out Battle cat.”
“Battle cat?” I laughed. He was really enjoying the He-Man references.
With a serious look, he nodded slowly. “Yes. Battle cat.”
“OK,” I said, dragging out the sound as I pushed the door open on his Ute and swung my legs out, trying to figure out how I was going to get down with everything I carried.
“At least let me carry all that shit to the door for you.”
“Nope. I’m fine,” I grunted, snaking my way out of the cab by leaning back and sliding on my butt until my feet hit the ground. When I managed the move successfully, I turned around to Kristian and gave him a triumphant smile. “Ha! I’m awesome.”
Shaking his head, he laughed. “Be careful in there, doll.”
“Yeah, yeah. I’ll be fine,” I said, taking a step toward the house. My foot hit the edge of a concrete manhole, causing me to trip and shriek, the slab in my hands slipping free. The beer hit the concrete with a thwack, causing the aluminium cans to crackle then hiss. Then beer sprouted up through the cardboard, saturating my shirt and hitting me in the face. “Battle cat!” I yelped, using my hands to try and stop the assaulting spray. “Battle cat!”
“Don’t just stand there taking it.” Kristian grabbed my arm and pulled me to the side of the fountain of beer, chuckling the entire time. “See, that was pretty easy, wasn’t it?” he asked, looking down at my dripping face. I stood in front of him, stinking like a brewery, my clothes wet, my hair ruined, trying not to breathe too deep so I wouldn’t suck beer up my nose.
“Battle cat,” I whimpered, feeling awfully sorry for myself.
“Come here,” Kristian said, then he leaned in and ran his tongue up my cheek, smacking his lips together. “Needs more hops,” he said. “Maybe some barley.”
I shook my head, unable to keep my smile in check. “You’re an idiot.”
“I’m not the one who stood there while beer sprayed me in the face.”
Rolling my eyes, I looked down at my now see-through pink shirt. “Maybe we should come back later—after I’ve had time to change.” I pulled the fabric away from my chest so he couldn’t see the bra underneath.
“No need to hide from me,” he teased, pulling my shirt free from my hands so he could see through it again. I slapped his hands away, causing him to playfully slap back and the next thing I knew, we were cartwheeling our hands at each other and laughing.
“Stop it. It’s not you looking I’m worried about.”
He playfully slapped my hands away again and smoothed his hands down my shirt so it stuck to me like glue. “You should always be worried about me,” he teased. Then he leaned down to kiss me.
“Ronnie?” Maree’s voice floated down the path, stopping us before our lips could touch.
“Oh, hey Maree,” I said, looking around Kristian’s big frame.
Kristian cleared his throat then shoved a balled-up shirt in my direction. It was the top I’d been wearing that first night I slept at his place. The one we’d properly fought over. I didn’t know why, but I was really touched that he still had it. I thought he’d burnt it after our fight. I turned my back and pulled the beer-soaked shirt off with Kristian jumping to shield my body from view. “I thought that maybe we could talk,” I called out to Maree. “I hated leaving things the way we did yesterday.”
“Yeah? Well, we been friends a long time,” Maree said, her voice curious as she eyed Kristian’s massive form. “Who’s he?”
“He’s Kristian.” I pulled the shirt over my head and tied the hem into a knot at my side so it didn’t look quite so massive on me.
Her eyes moved over him, head to toe then back up again. “Looks like one of them brothers from the other night? You didn’t bring a Cartwright here, did you?”
“I did,” I said. “I hoped we could talk. Maybe even give Dazz what he wanted yesterday.”
She folded her arms and pointed her chin at Kristian. “I don’t want him in me house. He can wait outside.”
“OK.” I turned and looked at him, even though he already knew he wasn’t coming in with me.
“It’s cool. I’ll see if there’s any cans worth saving and clean the rest up. Call out if you need me.”
“Battle cat.” I smiled and he gently tugged on my hair.
“That’s the one.”
Picking up the wine and the carton of smokes, I headed up the path and handed them to Maree. “A peace offering. I accidentally dropped the beer.”
Maree wrinkled up her nose. “I can smell that.�
� Then she turned her head to the side. “Dazz. Ronnie came back.”
“You fuckin’ serious?” he hollered, appearing in the doorway in about two seconds flat.
“Hey Dazz. I thought we could finish our talk. Maybe I do have something for you to take to your boss.”
“This better not be some trick.”
“It’s not. It’s good intel.”
He stood up a little straighter and tilted his head to the side. “I’m listenin’.”
About thirty minutes later, I was outside again, walking quickly towards Kristian who waited against his Ute the same way Toby had the day before.
“Well?” he asked as I powered toward him and he opened the car door.
“Let’s go. It’s not gonna work,” I said quickly, jumping in my seat.
“Why? What happened?”
“I was wrong. They don’t work for Grey at all.”
“Bullshit,” he said, closing his eyes for a moment. I could tell he already knew the answer, but he asked the question anyway. “Who do they work for, doll?”
I bit my lip. “Conway. They work for Conway.”
Chapter Eighteen
Stand Here And Look Pretty
I have never seen a person move as fast as Kristian did when he ran back up the pathway and into Maree and Dazza’s house. He didn’t even knock. He just jump-kicked the door and flew right in.
“No,” I yelled, chasing him into the house.
I caught up just as he snatched a phone out of Dazza’s hand then punched him in the face. “Sit the fuck down,” he yelled.
“Oh shit,” I gasped, covering my face as blood poured out of Dazza’s nose and ran down his chin. This was not supposed to happen.
Maree started screaming, and I ran over to her and begged her to be quiet. When she wouldn’t, I clamped my hand over her mouth, holding her in a headlock so she couldn’t escape and scream again.
I was the worst kind of friend for this. And it was going to take way more than a case of beer to fix it. “Kristian, stop!” I yelled, still holding a struggling Maree. “Stop hitting him. You’ve got this all wrong.”
Foolish Games: Cartwright Brothers, book 3 Page 14
