by Sally Rippin
Contents
1 A New Day, A New Friend
2 The Magazine Arrives
3 Lina Makes A Choice
4 A Family Story
5 The Mysterious Chinese Boy
6 A Friend to Visit
7 Sharing Secrets
8 Some Happy News
9 A True Writer
10 A Letter From the Age
11 Stella Davis
12 Christmas Drinks
13 The New House
14 A Secret Diary
Note from the author: Lina’s family would have
spoken Italian to each other and their friends, but
their conversations have been written in English
so that you can understand them.
LINA sat in the shade of the jacaranda tree, surrounded by a sea of purple flowers. In the distance she heard the bell for assembly. Her heart felt so heavy it was as if her whole body was sinking slowly into the gravel beneath her feet. I can’t go to assembly this morning, she thought. I can’t bring myself to sit with all those girls and sing hymns, pretending that nothing is wrong when I feel so broken inside.
Fortunately Lina knew of a place, a sanctuary, where she could hide out for an hour or so, just until she felt a little better.
Once all the girls in their crisp summer gingham and long white socks had finally disappeared into the assembly hall, Lina scooted across the courtyard, like a mouse, towards the welcoming burrow that was the library.
‘Aren’t you supposed to be in assembly?’ Sister Rosemary said, raising an eyebrow at Lina as she came through the heavy wooden door.
Lina winced. She thought about inventing a story, but before she could come up with something convincing, the truth gushed out of her. ‘I just can’t face those girls this morning,’ she said, hanging her head and gulping back her tears.
Sister Rosemary took one look at Lina’s sorrowful face and nodded. ‘I’d better put the kettle on,’ she said. ‘But if anyone asks, we’re having a meeting about the school magazine, all right?
‘Thank you,’ Lina said gratefully, sinking into her favourite armchair.
The library fireplace was unlit, swept clean now that it was summer and the school year nearly over. Instead of a roaring fire, Sister Rosemary had placed a large ceramic vase exploding with branches of pink cherry blossom, and their sweet fragrance mingled with the musty papery smell of books and the polished leather of the armchairs. Lina couldn’t imagine a more welcoming place to hide out and lick her wounds.
‘All right,’ said Sister Rosemary. She passed Lina a steaming mug of sweet milky tea and pulled up another armchair. ‘I am listening.’
Lina didn’t know where to begin. Should she start with the sadness she felt about her broken friendship with Mary? Or the shock and disbelief she felt overhearing Sarah betray her so ruthlessly? Or perhaps the loneliness she felt when she thought about another five years at St Brigid’s without a true friend? All of these thoughts jumbled up in Lina’s mind, competing for attention, but all that came out were the words: ‘I just feel so alone.’
It sounded too small and simple for all the weight Lina was carrying in her heart, but Sister Rosemary didn’t laugh, or even tell her not to be silly. She just nodded her head and said with feeling, ‘That must be hard.’
Sister Rosemary’s words were so powerful and yet so full of understanding that Lina realised this was all that she had needed to hear.
Yes, it was hard. Very hard sometimes. And to hear someone say it was like a gift of water in a sandy desert. It was enough just to sit there in silence across from Sister Rosemary, sipping at her tea, to feel her mind clear and her heart unclench.
When the bell went to mark the end of assembly and the beginning of the first class for the day, Lina stood up and handed Sister Rosemary her empty mug. ‘Thank you,’ she said calmly. ‘I feel much better now.’ And she walked out of the library, ready to face the day.
First class was French. Lina hesitated in the doorway when she saw that there was an empty seat next to Sarah. Over the last few weeks they had occasionally sat together in class as the time they spent in the library had spilled over into the rest of the day. They had almost become friends – or so Lina had thought. Sarah looked up as Lina shuffled between the rows of desks towards her but then, at the last moment, Lina saw a spare seat beside Julia Goldbloom, and plonked herself down there instead. Sarah seemed surprised but quickly looked ahead as Madame rapped on the blackboard with her long wooden ruler to get their attention. ‘Bonjour, mes élèves!’ she said shrilly.
‘Bonjour,’ Lina whispered to Julia, who smiled welcomingly.
For Lina, who spoke fluent Italian, French was ridiculously easy as the two languages were so similar. She was happy to see that Julia seemed to find it easy too, and when Madame put the girls into pairs for a surprise quiz, Lina and Julia blitzed the class.
‘You’re not bad,’ Julia grinned, as they packed up their books at the end of the lesson.
‘You too,’ said Lina, returning her smile. She had a sudden thought. She wondered if it was okay to ask. ‘Do you speak another language at home?’
Julia rolled her eyes. ‘Three, actually. My father is Polish but my grandmother is Russian. She speaks French, too. According to her, all educated people do. So, I speak Polish to my dad, Russian to my grandmother and we all speak French around the dinner table. It’s a bit tedious actually. Oh, and I go to Hebrew school on the weekends.’
Lina felt her mouth fall open. Three – no, four languages! she thought, amazed. And I thought I was juggling a lot with two! She snapped her mouth shut and followed Julia out of the classroom.
‘So, what have you got next?’ Julia said, as they joined the throng of girls spilling out into the busy hallway.
‘Maths,’ said Lina, grimacing. ‘My worst.’
‘Oh, me too,’ said Julia. ‘You doing hyperboles?’
Lina shook her head. ‘Algebra.’
Julia shrugged. ‘I don’t mind algebra. At least it’s got letters in it.’
Lina laughed. ‘I guess so.’ Then, just as Julia was about to turn away and head off to class, Lina took a deep breath. ‘Where do you sit for lunch?’
‘Behind the Science labs. With Amy and Bettina. And other girls sometimes.’ Julia looked deep into Lina’s face, as if looking for the answer to a question she didn’t quite have the courage to ask. ‘Want to join us?’
Lina felt her heart soar. ‘Thanks! I’d love to,’ she said, holding her voice steady.
Julia smiled and nodded a farewell over the top of her books. Lina clutched hers tightly and wove her way along the corridor towards her Maths class.
I can choose my own friends! she told herself proudly. I don’t need to wait till girls choose me.
And even though this seemed like the simplest, most obvious thought in the world, Lina realised it was also incredibly powerful. Perhaps school life wasn’t going to be so bad after all?
LINA sat by herself in Maths, as she always did, and tried to make sense of all the numbers on the board. As far as she was concerned she could have been reading Chinese. I bet Chinese would be easier! Lina thought, remembering how many languages Julia spoke and feeling very impressed. She didn’t even seem embarrassed that her family doesn’t speak English at home! And what was it that she said about her grandmother? That educated people all spoke French as well as Russian? It sounds like where Julia comes from speaking more than one language is a good thing!
‘Lina!’ A stern voice interrupted her thoughts. ‘I said, what is your answer to number seven?’
Lina looked around to see a few of the other girls stifling giggles and realised it couldn’t have been the first time Miss
Spensley had asked her this question. She quickly looked down at her exercise book. Unfortunately, the answer didn’t magically reveal itself as Lina had hoped it might. ‘Um . . . I don’t know,’ she admitted.
‘Well, if you paid more attention to your books and less to your daydreams, you might have a better idea,’ the teacher snapped.
‘Yes, Ma’am,’ Lina said, and the teacher directed the question to another girl.
When the bell went, Lina rushed to pack up her books and escape outside. Unfortunately, her teacher had other ideas. ‘Lina?’ she said, cornering her by the door. ‘A moment, please.’
Lina sighed and allowed the girls to filter past, then braced herself for another lecture about the importance of Maths in everyday life. ‘Even as a housewife, Lina, you will still need to know basic Maths to do the shopping and keep your home accounts. You can’t get by without it.’
‘Yes, Ma’am,’ Lina said, using Maths to count how many minutes of recess she was missing.
‘At this rate, if you don’t work harder, you will fail the subject,’ her teacher went on. ‘As it stands, you are teetering on the edge. I am very concerned at how you will fare in your end-of-year exam. It’s only a few weeks away now.’
‘I promise I’ll try harder,’ Lina said, ‘and study for my exam. I’ve just been so busy with the school magazine lately.’
At this Miss Spensley finally smiled. ‘So I gather,’ she said. ‘And I must say it does look fabulous. The Mother Superior left a stack of them in the staffroom for us to look at this morning. Have you seen a copy yet?’
‘No!’ said Lina, her heart leaping. ‘You mean it’s here already?’
‘Well, yes, but surely you heard the announcement in assembly? You girls have been invited to collect your copy from the front office today. You’d better get down there before you miss out!’
‘Oh! Oh!’ Lina gasped. ‘May I be excused?’ She leapt up without waiting for an answer and pelted out of the classroom, dumping her books in her locker on her way.
‘Lina! It looks great!’ someone yelled, as Lina ran past. Lina caught a glimpse of the magazine in her hands.
‘I love it!’ called another, as Lina sped by.
She jogged around the corner to see a long queue of girls snaking across the courtyard, all lined up to collect their magazines from the front office. Her heart sank. I can’t believe I’ll be the last person in the whole school to see it! she thought. She quickly joined the end of the line, jigging up and down on the spot in desperation.
‘Hey, no pushing,’ said the girl in front of her, spinning around irritably, but when she saw who it was, the expression on her face changed. ‘Oh!’ she said. ‘The Mother Superior is looking for you! Don’t you know? Look, here she comes now!’
Lina felt that familiar mix of awe and fear to see those flapping black robes swooping across the courtyard towards her. Her stomach tightened as she tried to read the nun’s face from a distance. Am I in trouble? she wondered.
‘Lina!’ the Mother Superior called. ‘What are you doing in that queue? Come to my office immediately! I have been looking for you everywhere!’
Lina’s heart began to pound. Had the Mother Superior found out she hadn’t been in assembly? She slunk out of the line and skipped to keep up with the retreating nun. By the time they reached her office the Mother Superior was quite red-faced and out of breath.
‘Oh, I do dislike the Australian summers,’ she groaned, sinking down into her leather armchair and fanning herself with an enrolment brochure. On her desk stood a large jug of lemonade, ice tinkling and sliced lemons bobbing about in the froth. The Mother Superior poured two long glasses and handed one to Lina, who took it in surprise and held it in front of her, not quite sure what to do with it.
‘Well, drink up girl,’ the Mother Superior insisted. ‘It’s freshly made!’ She took a long gulp herself, then plonked her glass on the desk. It was then that Lina noticed another glass – used – in front of the empty chair beside her. The Mother Superior caught Lina’s glance.
‘We waited a good fifteen minutes for you,’ she explained, fanning herself again. ‘But Sarah had to go. She had a debating meeting, I believe. We were expecting you here too. Didn’t you hear the announcement in assembly?’
Lina could only shake her head dumbly.
The Mother Superior smiled and her pink cheeks rose up into shiny apples. She reached into her top drawer and pulled out a copy of the magazine. Then she handed it to Lina with much ceremony. ‘I think you will find it is quite a success, my dear.’ She gestured her head in the direction of the window. Lina peered through the glass out into the courtyard to see huddles of girls, heads together, all bowed over copies of the magazine. Beyond them, the queue only seemed to have grown longer.
Lina looked down at her own copy. She stroked her fingers across the glossy front cover, then turned the pages slowly. She could never have dreamed it would look so wonderful. She looked up again at the Mother Superior, who was still smiling broadly. ‘Congratulations,’ she said warmly. ‘You should be very proud.’
Lina beamed. She had never felt prouder.
WALKING out into the sunshine, the magazine clasped to her chest, Lina looked about the courtyard and realised she had never seen it so still and silent. Almost every girl at St Brigid’s had found herself a shady corner, and was lying stretched out on the lawns under trees or lolling about on benches, often in a group of three or four, studiously reading the first school magazine from cover to cover. Occasionally a girl would look up to read out a passage or a poem, or to point out the work of someone they knew, and there were squeals of delight over the fashion pages and photographs of Elvis Presley. Lina walked among them as if in a daze. From time to time they would call out to her.
‘We love the magazine, Lina!’
‘The fashion page is brill!’
‘So’s the page on Elvis Presley!’
‘Love the Dawn Fraser interview!’
Lina smiled back gratefully, looking for an empty bench to sit and read the magazine herself. So far no one had mentioned the story she had written. This made her nervous. Have they read it yet? she wondered. Or are they too interested in their own work and dazzled by the stories on celebrities? Worse still had they read it and not liked it?
Just as she finally found her own place in the shade, the bell rang, and all the girls folded up their magazines, dusted the grass from their summer uniforms and ambled back to class, chatting loudly all the way.
Lina’s next lessons passed in a whirr. Each time she slipped into the corridor traffic between classes she was stopped by someone wanting to tell her how much they loved the magazine. She felt like she was floating on air.
Curiously, the two girls she wanted to run into hadn’t crossed her path yet, but when the bell went for lunch, the first of them came dashing up to her at the lockers.
‘Lina!’
She spun around in surprise at the familiar voice. It was Mary, out of breath, still clutching an armful of books from her last class. Even though they hadn’t spoken in weeks, Lina was amazed at how good it felt to have her old friend approach her with a friendly wave.
‘The magazine looks great! Congratulations!’ Mary said, turning on her most brilliant smile. ‘Look, I know we’ve been through kind of a bad patch lately, but I was hoping you might want to come and sit with me today? I sit with Claire and Mathilda, in the students’ lounge. We have a ball! Mathilda is so funny. You’ll love her!’ She grasped Lina’s arm.
Despite all the heartache of the last few weeks, the thought of sitting with her old best friend again – with the popular girls – was so appealing that Lina felt all her earlier resolve start to crumble away. ‘Um . . . really?’ she stammered. ‘I mean, sure!’
‘Great!’ said Mary, looking so pleased that Lina felt her heart swell. ‘Look, I have to see a teacher now, but I’ll meet you there in fifteen, okay? We have so much to catch up on!’
Lina nodded eagerly.
‘Bye, Lina Meena!’ Mary said in a sing-song voice, just like she used to, and trotted off down the corridor, ponytail swinging. Lina felt her face heat up with happiness.
Then, no sooner was Mary out of sight when Sarah came rushing up to her. ‘Lina!’ she called out. ‘I’ve been looking for you everywhere! Didn’t you get the message that the Mother Superior wanted to see us this morning? I waited in her office for you at recess. Have you seen the magazine? Isn’t it fabulous? Everybody loves it!’ she gushed, hugging a copy to her chest. ‘We’re famous, Lina!’
Lina drew her lips in tight, remembering the awful things she had overheard Sarah say at the lockers that very morning.
‘What’s wrong?’ Sarah said, peering curiously at Lina’s clouding expression.
Lina turned away and began packing her books into her locker. ‘You’d better be careful,’ she said. ‘Someone might catch you talking to a wog!’
Sarah gasped. ‘What are you talking about?’ Then her eyes narrowed. ‘Mary told you, didn’t she?’
Lina shook her head. ‘No. I heard you. At the lockers this morning.’
‘Look,’ Sarah said, rolling her eyes like Lina had completely misunderstood the whole situation. ‘I only said that to Mary because she wants you back as a friend, now that you’re so popular because of the magazine, of course, and I was trying to keep her away from you. She’s a user, Lina. She used me and she’ll use you, too. I’m saying this for your own good. Mary is bad news. Believe me! I’ve known her since kindergarten!’
Maybe Sarah’s right? Lina thought, suddenly feeling very confused. But would she really say something like that to Mary just to protect me?
‘You know I’m telling the truth,’ Sarah continued, shaking her head like she couldn’t believe Lina would even doubt her. ‘You really don’t won’t to get caught up with Mary and her nasty friends again. Come on. Let’s go to the library and we can have a cup of tea with Sister Rosemary to celebrate. I have to pick up another copy of the magazine first, so I’ll meet you there, okay? See you soon!’
