“I haven’t decided what I want to do right now.”
“You can move back into the model condo.”
“I don’t think that’s a good idea.”
Leo frowned. “Where do you plan to stay, then?”
“I don’t know!” she answered, her voice rising just a little. She was obviously getting peeved at him, which meant that he’d pushed too hard. Again.
He thought he knew quite a bit about women. He had a sister, a mother, a female business partner. He had female friends. He’d had enough lovers that he knew what he was doing in that department. But he kept making mistakes with Amanda.
“Amanda is going to stay with us,” Christie said, coming up the hallway. “There’s no reason to drive off somewhere or spend money on a motel when we have a perfectly fine guest room right here. Or if she’d rather, she can stay in the old house.”
“The house where my mother lived?” she said, turning with excitement to Christie. “I remember seeing it when…”
“When I took you on a tour of the ranch,” Leo finished for her.
“Yes, then. I didn’t want you to think I was snooping.”
“The thought never crossed my mind.”
“I’m not sure I want to stay there, though. It might seem…I don’t know, odd.”
Christie nodded. “Troy and Cal can show you around and then you can decide.”
“That would be great.”
“How about me? I could take you down there and—”
Christie and Amanda both said, “No!” at the same time.
Leo sighed. “Okay, I get it. I just don’t want you to drive away,” he admitted to Amanda. “I want to see you.”
She looked at him for several seconds before saying, “Okay, how about if I meet you at the Coffee Crossing in the morning?”
Or you could just come to my condo. “What time?”
“Nine o’clock, if that’s not too late for you to get to the hardware store.”
“I’ll be there, and for you, my schedule is flexible.”
Christie shook her head. “You have got to work on your lines.”
“Hey, I was sincere.” He thought for a moment, then admitted, “Okay, maybe I’m a little rusty. But I meant it. I’ll take the whole week off if it means I can spend time with Amanda.”
Christie patted him on the shoulder, and this time, Amanda rolled her eyes.
AMANDA FELT AS NERVOUS as a cat in a room full of rocking chairs, as her mother used to say. She settled in the only booth in the coffee shop with a little privacy, placed her vanilla latte to the side and opened her laptop. Leo probably wouldn’t be down for another few minutes and she wanted time to check her online auctions. The postcard groupings that she’d put up last week were doing quite well. Texas was a popular place, and so were the vacation spots from the 1950s and 1960s.
She had a few other things there: Fiesta dinnerware salt-and-pepper shakers, plates and a coffee creamer. An old radio had one bidder, and some vintage metal signs were doing quite well. She sipped her coffee and said a silent prayer for lots of bidders.
She needed the money, but she wasn’t sure if it was going to buy her gas to get out of Texas or pay for a place to stay while she was here.
Or maybe she’d find a more permanent arrangement. Her own apartment. Perhaps she could get a place in the same complex where Darla and Cassie lived. Maybe she could get a roommate to split costs. Garage sale and thrift store pickings were good here, so she could—
“Good morning,” Leo said, swinging into the bench seat across from her. He put his coffee cup down between them. “Are you working?”
“I was checking my online auctions, but I’m done,” she said, putting her laptop on hibernate and closing the top. Her heart beat a little faster when she looked at him. “You’re a few minutes early.”
He paused for a moment before saying, “I couldn’t wait to see you.”
She frowned. “That sounded like a line.”
“I’m just trying to be careful what I say.”
“It’s not always what a person says, but what they’re thinking while they’re saying it.”
Leo frowned. “What does that mean?”
“Just that you always seem to be thinking ahead— ‘scheming,’ I guess most people would call it, although I don’t mean that in a negative way. It’s like life is a big chess match, with people the full-size pieces, and you’re trying to decide how everyone’s move affects the game.”
He seemed to consider her assessment for a moment, then said, “I guess you’re right. That’s the way my brain works. I am usually thinking ahead.”
“It’s kind of upsetting sometimes because it makes me feel as if you’re trying to manipulate me.”
“I… Okay, I did try to get you to tell me about why you were really here. It was like a game to me when we first met. And then you became a mystery I had to figure out. So I was trying to get clues to the mystery, and I know I tried to coerce you into telling me things that you didn’t want to reveal.”
Amanda drew patterns on the tabletop. “That’s the weird thing. I did want to tell you. At times, I wanted to tell you so badly it hurt to keep it inside.”
“Why didn’t you?”
“Because it was my story to tell to Cal and Troy. I know this sounds strange, but I felt that if I told others, it would dilute the strength of the story. I felt I’d be cheating them out of the truth.”
Leo seemed deep in thought for a moment, then nodded. “I understand. It’s like when I went into a blackjack tournament with a strategy. I didn’t want to talk about it to anyone. The time I did…well, I made a mistake.”
“As in you lost money?”
“No, I won, but I lost my career, my…passion, I guess you could say. As is so often the case in the movies, it was a beautiful woman who brought me down.”
Amanda felt intrigued despite the idea that a beautiful woman had been close enough to Leo for him to reveal his secrets. She imagined someone like a dark haired, almond-eyed, exotic “Bond girl” sliding her hands all over his well-fitted tux, feeling his firm chest while his heart beat fast beneath her hand.
Stop it. That was a long time ago, in a lifetime far away. Of course he’d had other women. Lots of them.
“Really? Who would have thought that?” Amanda said in what she hoped was a flippant voice.
“I told her about the other players, their strengths and weaknesses. I told her about my game plan, how I was going to win. She asked me questions about whether other players would cheat, and if so, how they would do it.”
“Why was she so interested?”
“Because she was setting me up. She used what I told her against me, turning it around to sound as if I was scared of losing so I planned to cheat. And then she planted evidence in my personal belongings and made sure our host found it.”
Amanda frowned, horrified that someone would do that to Leo. “But why would she do such a thing?”
“Because she was being paid by one of the other players. He wanted me out and this was the best way to make sure it was permanent. Especially when it was suggested that this wasn’t the first time I’d cheated.”
“How terrible! That was your life, playing cards and traveling the world.”
“It was. It’s not anymore. And quite frankly, it’s not something I really want to return to. It was fun. It was even easy, once you got used to the odd hours and the distractions of the casinos. The most apprehensive times were being isolated in the homes of private players, which were more like fortresses in some cases. But it wasn’t something that seemed all that real, even while it was happening. When it came to an end, I returned to reality.” He paused. “I wear this ring to remind myself how quickly life can change.”
“And what could be more real than owning a hardware store in your hometown?”
“I’ve always been good with tools, I know everyone and it’s a steady job. I like walking in and smelling the old wood of the floors and shel
ves and the new metal of the tools and fittings, seeing the rows of nails, screws and bolts, and figuring out what the next new gadget is going to be.”
“You love your hardware store.”
He looked thoughtful for a moment, then said, “Yeah, I guess I do. But I don’t know if I want to do that forever.”
“I love selling online but I’m not sure I’ll want to do that, either.”
He reached for her hand. “Then what are we going to do with the rest of our lives, Amanda Allen Crawford?”
She looked into his clear blue eyes and searched his handsome face for something that was missing in this picture. Something that had been left unsaid.
Like why he was interested enough in her to send Troy Crawford an airline ticket, involve himself in her family and keep insisting they needed to “talk” despite her trying to cleanly break off their relationship.
She shook her head. “I have no idea what I want to do later or where I’m going to live.”
“Why don’t you stay here?”
Not exactly the strongest argument she could imagine. “Are you asking me to stay?”
“I’ve been asking you to stay for over a week!”
“Yes, you’ve been suggesting that this is a good town, full of good people. But why specifically should I stay here? I mean, other than the fact I have family in the area.”
“That’s a better reason than a lot of people have when they pick a place to live.”
“I’ve never ‘picked’ a place to live.”
“You could get a regular job here if you wanted to. Or maybe you’d like to open your own store, sell retail instead of online. Maybe even go into business with Christie.”
“I don’t have that kind of money.”
“You’ve got that inheritance coming.”
“I’ve thought about using the money to go to school. I’ve never had the chance to go to college.”
“Which school?”
“I have no idea. I haven’t looked. It’s really just an idea.”
“If that’s what you want—”
“I’m not sure! I said I’m thinking about it.” Was the man dense? Didn’t he know she was waiting for him to say something about how much he wanted her to stay in Brody’s Crossing because he cared for her and wanted them to be together. “What do you want?”
“For me, or what do I want for you?”
For us. But she wasn’t going to lay everything on the table. She wasn’t going to put words in his mouth.
She let out a frustrated breath. “If you’re asking me to stay, is it for you or because you think it’s right for me?”
She watched the confused expression on Leo’s face and knew right then that they weren’t thinking the same things at all. “Never mind,” she said, picking up her computer and stowing it in her tote bag. “I’ve got to go.”
“No, wait. I’m thinking.”
“If you have to think that much, just forget about it.” She put her bag over her shoulder and took her car keys out of her pocket.
“Where are you going?”
“I’m going back to the Rocking C. I want to spend some time with Troy.” She stood up and reached for her purse.
“Then what?” Leo’s voice seemed to have an edge to it, an impatient, worried tone that she’d never heard from him until last night, in Cal’s study.
“Then…I’m not sure. But honestly, it’s my business.”
“I’m just a little confused. Why can’t what I want be the same thing that you want?”
“Because we’re not a couple. We don’t know each other that well. And besides, you never have told me what you want for yourself. You say that you might not stay here, that you’re not sure about your future. Why are you so concerned with my decisions when you haven’t made any firm plans yourself?”
“So you want assurances that I’ll always be here?”
“I didn’t say that, but if we were to become involved, then yeah, I guess I would.”
“That’s asking a lot.”
“I’ve settled for less all my life. I’m tired of settling. If you ask me to stay, you’d damn well better be offering something in return.”
“I repeat, you’re asking a lot.”
“I know I am, but I’m worth it. And I’m tired of being timid about what I want. I waited ten years to find my brothers. I’m not waiting another ten years for a man to decide what he wants from life.”
“This is all new for me, too.”
“You’re the only one who can decide what’s right for you. Look, I appreciate all the help—driving me around, taking me shopping, taking me to dinner, arranging for me to stay in the condo. But it’s time to move on.” She turned to walk out of the coffee shop before she started crying for the gazillionth time since coming to this town.
They had generated quite an audience.
Amanda closed her eyes but could still see the faces of Sandy and James Brody, his mother, Caroline, and Clarissa, along with a few people she didn’t recognize. Behind the counter, Riley stood with her mouth open, holding a stainless steel cup full of frothy milk.
Great. Just great. She’d completely forgotten she was in a public place. She’d just aired her dirty laundry, as her mother used to say, in front of a crowd.
But then Clarissa and Caroline came forward and hugged her.
“You stand up for yourself,” Clarissa said. “Don’t you ever settle for less than you want.”
“That’s right,” Caroline said. “He’ll discover the right words sooner or later.”
“If it’s not ‘sooner,’ it may be never,” Amanda murmured. “I’m not waiting forever.”
“Of course not,” Clarissa agreed. “Now, you go home and see your brothers. And play with your niece and nephew. There’s always family.”
Amanda nodded and made her way to the door, receiving encouragement from Sandy and a few others along the way. She made it to her car before her legs got wobbly and she collapsed on the seat.
She’d thought the most emotional moment of her trip would be confronting her brothers, but she’d been wrong. The hardest part of this whole journey was walking away from the man she loved.
Chapter Fifteen
Leo watched Amanda walk out the door. She seemed exhausted and defeated as she passed by the glass windows on the way to her car.
He wanted to go to her, take her canvas bag out of her hands, lift her burdens in any way he could. He wanted to fix this mess he’d somehow caused, but he had no idea how to do that.
James walked up to him.
“How much did you hear?” Leo asked.
“Enough to know that you’re in way over your head. What were you thinking, trying to get her to stay when the only reason you can give is that it’s a nice place to live?”
Leo shrugged. “I don’t know. I think about saying other things, but then I open my mouth and nothing comes out but drivel.”
“Drivel is right. Man, you need some help.”
Leo looked back at his friend as Amanda drove away. “You’re right. I need some advice.”
Sandy came up and laced her arm through James’s. “And this man can help. He went through something similar when I was getting ready to leave town. He had to come up with a better reason than wanting me to stay in town for the holidays.”
“But it is logical for her to start over here,” Leo said. “It’s where her brother lives, and she already knows people here and they care about her.”
“Leo, your math brain is getting the better of you,” Sandy said. “Amanda is the kind of person who could make a place for herself anywhere. Of course people like her. You have to convince her that this is the one place on Earth that she can be happy.”
“But how do I do that?” Leo felt like stomping his feet and throwing a tantrum, just like a toddler in his store did last week.
“Man, don’t you know?” James asked. “You admit that you love her and you ask her to spend the rest of her life with you. Stop thinking and sta
rt feeling.”
Sandy smiled up at her husband. “See how smart he is?”
LOVE? HE LOVED AMANDA? How could that be? When had that happened? Was it real?
Leo staggered up the steps like a drunk after a New Year’s party. He had to think about this. He’d never been in love before. He had no idea what he was supposed to be feeling or if there were other signs or even if James and Sandy were right.
How could they know something about him that he didn’t know himself?
He turned the key and let himself into the condo before collapsing on the couch.
And then he immediately remembered Amanda sitting there beside him, not touching, watching the movie. And talking. And then she’d literally attacked him with kisses and told him she was absolutely sure she knew what she wanted.
But did she? Had he been fooling himself into thinking that what he wanted was to unravel her mystery, show her a really good time, enjoy her company for as long as they had together before she went on her way? Or he left on some new venture he couldn’t describe or imagine at the moment?
Neither one of them had mentioned anything about love, and yet…there was something between them that felt so right, so intense, that he couldn’t even put it into words. He’d never felt that way before and maybe that was why he didn’t recognize whatever it was. But that was the heat of the moment, the passionate responses of two healthy, consenting adults.
How about what he felt when they were both fully dressed?
He thought back to the times they’d spent together. He’d gone shopping with her at thrift stores. He’d had to be patient when she wouldn’t tell him why she’d come to town. He’d watched her struggle to tell her story and defend her mother to her brothers.
He hadn’t liked any of those things, but he would gladly go through them again and again if it would help Amanda in some small way. He wanted her to be happy. She’d grown up differently from him, without the support and love of an extended family and community. He’d taken all that for granted in his own life. And yet Amanda had managed to become a kind, thoughtful person without those benefits. That was one of the reasons he admired her so much. That, and her perseverance and courage and…
Suddenly Texan Page 17
