by LL Meyer
“Lily Friesen?”
The three of us look up to find the lady cop from before standing behind the counter watching us impassively. We all get up.
Jason leads the way, still holding her hand; he’s been here before and knows the drill. I can see that the cop’s about to tell us that we all can’t go, when Lily speaks up. “Please, can they both come?”
The cop’s expression softens at her plea and she acquiesces. We follow her to a small, windowless interview room where there’s a guy waiting for us in a chair on the far side of the table. He’s old, with a graying moustache and a wrinkled suit. He smiles kindly at Lily, so he’s okay in my books.
Officer Clarke sits beside the guy, Jason and I sit in the remaining two chairs, and Lily sits on my lap. The old guy obviously doesn’t approve of this, but doesn’t say anything.
“Lily, I’m Detective Pearson of the Eugene PD.”
“Hi,” she says weakly.
“So there have been some developments in your case that we thought you should know about.”
“Did you get the guy?” I demand and the detective’s eyes land on me in open disapproval now.
“And you are?”
“Dane Wilson, her boyfriend,” I answer levelly.
“No, we haven’t found him yet.” He turns his attention back to Lily. “But with the information in his wallet, we were able to piece together where he was staying. It was through the IP address connected to that location that we found some disturbing evidence.”
He hesitates now, as if not sure how to continue.
“It appears that your information has recently shown up on a . . . rape fantasy website.”
Holy fuck. What? The air is ripped from my lungs. Lily goes completely stiff in my arms. Only Jason seems able to function.
“Recently?” he asks. “So the other times aren’t related to this?”
“As far as we can tell, that’s correct,” the detective confirms. “Unfortunately, we’re unable to do much. Neither the website nor the server is located in the U.S. Currently, it’s blocked here, but I won’t lie. This poses a real danger.”
He continues on. “I’d like to go over some ways that you can protect yourself, Lily.”
He waits for her to acknowledge him, but she’s completely shell-shocked.
“But how did this happen?” Jason asks, sounding angry now.
Lily relaxes when the detective’s attention shifts to Jason.
“We think her information was sold to the website by whoever has been harassing her locally. Tracking that link is our best possible way of limiting Lily’s future exposure. While her information is permanently in cyberspace, if we can find out who’s done this, we can stop that information from being updated.
“Here’s what I need from you, Lily. I need to know that you have somewhere to stay on a permanent basis,” he says. “A place where you won’t be living alone.”
I nod firmly. “She does.”
“Good. The next step is to stay away from social media. It’s no one’s business where you are or will be at any given time.”
She snorts softly. “That’s not a problem.”
“Now for some good news,” he says, a ghost of a smile lightening his features. “The information from the registrar’s office included a picture of you that was taken almost four years ago. Your hair is much longer now and is a different color. Also, it appears your attacker was able to find you because of your exam schedule and that’s finished now. Your change of address will go a long way to mitigating the chances of any further incidents. And we’ll have the summer to investigate the registrar’s office.”
We’re both relaxing now; I can feel the tension leaking from her posture.
“Do you have any questions for me?” he asks kindly.
We’re all quiet.
“Okay, then. I’ll be in touch when I have more information.” He hands her a business card and she takes it. He leaves the room, and Officer Clarke hovers at the door.
“Lily,” she says. “Take a minute if you need it. I’ll be right outside.”
“Thank you,” Lily says softly.
When the door shuts, Lily pulls back and looks from me to Jason and back.
Jason speaks first. “Well, I’ll just say what we’re all thinking: What the . . . hell?”
A hint of a smile pulls at Lily’s lips. “You were going to say fuck.”
“I was. But I’m trying to be sensitive.”
I laugh a bit, I can’t help it. Leave it to Jason to make her smile in a God-awful situation. Now, all of our expressions are not half as grim as they were only two minutes ago.
“I think,” I say as I run my hand up and down her arm, “that we’re already doing the things he talked about.”
Jason nods. “Between the two of us, you’ll be fine, Pretty Girl.” He holds out his palm to her and she takes it, and then I slip mine on top.
“Group hug,” I say with a grin. Jason pulls his chair closer and we huddle up, our hands still clasped in the center. “It’s going to be okay.” I kiss her cheek and Jason kisses the other.
“Let’s get out of here and go home,” Jason says, pulling away.
As we stand, I meet Jason’s eyes over Lily’s head. I want him to know that we’re okay, that I meant what I said outside. Even if I was still annoyed, which I’m not now, Lily needs him just as much as I do. I can see that now.
Outside in the parking lot, I put Lily in the car and turn to Jason who’s lingering nearby.
“As long as she seems okay, we’ll talk to her when we get home,” I announce. At least he has the grace not to smirk at me, just nods and walks to his car.
I get in with her and see that she looks positively green.
“I really think it’s going to be okay, Lil.” I reach out to stroke her cheek. “You’ll be safe with us.”
She shakes her head. “It’s not about that,” she whispers.
“Oh.” I press my lips together, my stomach suddenly churning. “We’ll talk when we get home, okay? Just know that no matter what, everything’s fine between us.”
She looks at me like I’ve grown another head. “Dane –”
“Lily,” I interrupt her. “Can we talk about this at home?” How can I tell her that I need Jason to back me up, to help me keep her from bolting for the front door if she can’t forgive me for suggesting another man fuck her? Jesus, now I remember why I decided not to do this.
I pull out and we drive home in eerie silence. It’s both a blessing and a curse that it doesn’t take long. At least the staff will be gone by the time we get there.
The mood in the car is oppressive. Dane doesn’t want to talk; he’s distant and preoccupied. And me? Where do I start? The website? Jason’s summary of what the fuck? is what I’m sticking with for now. And the other thing? I feel absolutely sick to my stomach. It doesn’t matter how many times Dane tells me that everything is fine, I still can’t get over what I did. Somehow, I’ve taken the best thing that’s ever happened to me and stabbed it in the heart. Grief swamps me.
At home, Dane cuts through the Great Room and comes out under the landing with a bottle of something. Jason follows him into the kitchen, leaving me to trail behind. I lean dejectedly against the doorjamb while Dane noisily slaps three shot glasses from the cupboard down on the island and proceeds to fill them with golden alcohol, which I now see is tequila.
“Come on, Pretty Girl,” Dane says. It’s not a request. Shuffling forward, I park myself at the end of the island where he’s indicating. With Jason on my right and Dane on my left, I keep my eyes down, focusing on the random patterns in the white countertop, which contrasts against the color of my fingertips.
“Look at me, Lily.” Again with the voice, and my eyes slowly lift to his. “What happened was my fault,” Dane says.
His words make me sicker.
“Neither of us set any boundaries,” he continues, gesturing at Jason.
“What difference does that make?” I s
ay angrily. “I still did it.”
“It’s okay, Lil.”
“What’s okay?! What does that even mean?”
Dane pushes a shot toward me. “Drink this.”
No! I want to yell at him. But he’s looking at me with the expression that goes with the voice: no arguing. I pick up the shot glass and throw the liquid back. It barely registers. Both Dane and Jason do the same and then he pours more.
“Dane,” I say, exasperated.
“One more,” he says. “And then we’ll talk.”
In the back of my mind, I’m wondering what the hell is going on. Talk about what? What a whore I am? How I have the perfect guy and then I move in on his best friend? His brother?!
Obviously Jason can see the distress on my face because now he’s leaning closer, like he wants to comfort me. But that’s how this started in the first place. I can’t accept his comfort – not now, not ever. I jerk away from him.
“One more,” Dane repeats, more gently this time.
I take up the shot glass in my shaky hand and down it in one go. They follow suit. And now Dane looks uncomfortable, like his next words are going to be distasteful. No, no, no. “I’m so sorry,” I whisper jaggedly.
“And I told you before, it’s okay. If you want it to be, it’s okay.”
I have no idea what he means and my confusion must show because Jason finally speaks.
“You’re going to have to be more specific, Dane.” His discomfort is similar to Dane’s. What the hell?
“More specific about what?” I demand.
Dane starts. “I . . . we . . . want . . .” He can’t maintain eye contact, and my anxiety level goes through the roof.
I quickly glance at Jason who’s fidgeting with his shot glass. Suddenly, he looks directly at me. “What he’s trying to say is that I want you.”
I feel lightheaded; the tequila has hit my bloodstream, and I can’t seem to draw a proper breath. “Well, yeah,” I retort softly.
Dane snorts with laughter, but when my eyes snap to his, it dies immediately and we’re silent again.
Jason sighs, drawing my gaze once again. “Let’s try this again. I want you.” Pause. “And he’s okay with that.”
Something hot and bitter scalds the back of my throat.
“Lil,” Dane says, reaching for me, but I step back.
“You want to loan me out?” I whisper.
“What?! No!” He looks absolutely horrified. “Nothing like that,” he says vehemently. My personal space disappears and he’s grasping my jaw, forcing me to look at him. “That makes it sound like you’re not mine, and no matter what happens between the three of us . . . you’re mine, Lily.”
After a blank second, my mind staggers. The three of us? As his eyes blaze down at me, I have the surreal idea that this is a joke. “Are you teasing me?” I whisper. So help me, I would never forgive him.
He huffs out a breath that becomes a weak laugh. “No, definitely not.”
The tension in the way he’s holding me relaxes, allowing me to sink into his chest. In the circle of his arms, with his scent surrounding me, I feel better. And slowly realization begins to dawn on me.
“Is that what you guys were fighting about? Me?”
I pull away from Dane, so I can see both of their faces, but once again neither of them is willing to meet my eyes. My stomach lurches nervously.
“I don’t understand,” I whisper, looking to Dane. “If you don’t want this, why . . .”
“Because I was scared of your reaction.”
My stomach twists again, but this time for a completely different reason. “So you do want it?” I hold my breath waiting for his answer.
He reaches out and snags the back of my head, pulling me to him until our foreheads touch. “God, I do,” he murmurs, the desire in his voice unmistakeable. “But if you don’t, this will be the end of it. I’ll never bring it up again, and Jason will leave you alone.”
My head is literally spinning now. I can’t seem to focus on any one thing. I can have him and Jason? There must be a catch somewhere, but my brain isn’t telling me what it is.
“You would always be there?” I ask hesitantly.
“If that’s what you want, of course,” he confirms.
“Watching?”
My question makes his eyes sink a bit. “Sometimes.”
“And the other times?” As the words come out of my mouth an image from the sex shop video fills my mind. “Like the movie?” I breathe. The idea of Jason and Dane doing that to me leaves me equally turned on and terrified.
“Without being so . . . rough, yes. And everything would be completely consensual. I’d never pressure you to do anything you don’t want to.” He leans in to briefly kiss my lips and then lifts his head to look at Jason. “And neither would Jason, would you Jase?”
I turn and meet Jason’s intense, lust-filled gaze. I shiver.
“Never,” he promises. “You know I wouldn’t.”
“You would still be wholly my responsibility,” Dane says in earnest. “I keep you safe and sound, remember? That’s not going to change.”
I look up at Dane. I have one more question and I need to see his eyes for this. Gathering my courage, I murmur, “You wouldn’t think less of me?”
He sucks in a surprised breath. “Are you saying yes, Pretty Girl?”
Thank you so much for reading The Penny Books. I admit to beginning them on a lark. While every book I write is based on a love story of some sort, I have never attempted to write one where it was the whole story. So, color me surprised when Lily, Dane, Jason, and later Avery came to mean so much to me – and I do mean a lot. No characters have ever consumed me so completely. To say that I’m going to miss them now that the journey is done is an understatement. I hope you enjoyed reading about them as much as I enjoyed writing about them.
Please consider leaving a review, or dropping me a note at [email protected].
I would love to hear your thoughts.
Table of Contents
1 - Lily
2 - Dane
3 – Lily
4 – Dane
5 – Lily
6 – Dane
7 – Lily
8 – Dane
9 – Lily
10 – Dane
11 – Lily
12 – Dane
13 – Lily
14 – Dane
15 – Lily
16 – Dane
17 – Lily
18 – Dane
19 – Lily
20 – Dane
21 – Lily
22 – Dane
23 – Lily
24 – Dane
25 – Lily
26 – Dane
27 – Lily
28 – Dane
29 – Lily
30 – Dane
31 – Lily
32 – Lily
33 – Dane
34 – Lily
Author's Note
