Meg, he thought for one wild instant. But he rose from the table.
“Sleep, I think, Hayden”
The others ignored Hayden’s invitation to stay, standing at once to file out, stopping only to collect cloaks before spilling somberly into the cold night. Once they were outside and alone, Hayden spoke abruptly,
“Tomorrow. Seven A.M. On the common. We shall have to leave town before dawn. Demarest, Gillen, if you breathe a word of this to anyone I shall personally see you outcast “
“Good thing Knowles ain’t here,” Gillen mumbled.
“But I must say something to Ferrell,” Bertram protested. “Father mustn’t know, but m’brother Ferrell-”
Hayden looked to Chas, who nodded.
“All right,” Hayden conceded. “Seven of us. No more”
Chas drew a breath of the damp night air.
“I thank you gentlemen,” he said. “Tomorrow then.” And he turned to leave with his cousins.
Meg had been received at the duchess’ kitchen. The large manservant, Alphonse, had shielded Meg bodily, seemingly on all sides, as they walked the few feet from their horses to the house. Meg was quickly relieved of the wet cloak and bonnet and whisked upstairs to a bedroom, where a bright fire blazed.
The duchess, she was told, had adhered to her usual Friday night appointment, so that no signal should be sent that anything was amiss. Her Grace would join Meg later. Some tea would be brought up.
Meg prowled the room for some time, examining the paintings, books and ornaments, looking for any evidence of Cabot, of which she disappointingly found none. She read for a while, but as the hour grew late, she found it increasingly difficult to concentrate. She opened her journal and carefully unwrapped the pressed violets.
She fell asleep there in the chair by the fire, because she was next aware of gentle fingers on her arm and a soft voice saying,
“Ma belle … ma belle … Meg”
Meg looked up at a petite, silvery lady in shimmering gray silk. She leaned upon an ivory-tipped cane. As Meg started to rise, the duchess placed a hand on her shoulder.
“No. Do not stir yourself.” Her voice was sweet and calming. “I shall join you here” She signaled a waiting maid, who curtsied and left the room.
As the duchess took the chair opposite her own, Meg realized the fire had been stoked, and that someone also had covered her with a blanket.
“I apologize, your Grace. I did not mean to sleep.”
“You must not apologize. I am returning much too late-it is after ten. I should not have come in, but I wished to see that you were here, and safe.” She leaned forward from her chair and gently cradled Meg’s hands. “Ma belle, it must have hurt him to leave you this night.”
Hurt him? As Meg glanced down, the duchess patted her hands and sat back.
“They are from Brookslea,” she said, gesturing to Meg’s pressed violets on the table beside her. “They are the favorites of Charles-for his favorite, yes?”
“Your Grace. .
“Non, non. You must call me Grandmere, as do my grandsons. Or if you choose, Therese, as do my friendsfor I know we shall be friends.”
“Therese. You must know that your grandson … that we are not really married.” “
The duchess smiled.
I think you will find that Charles is most determined on it.” “
“But Charles
“You call him Charles, then?”
I … hardly know what to call him” She again looked down and toyed with her new ring. The duchess noticed.
“It is very old,” she said. “It was his father’s-given to my daughter, his mother.” She observed Meg’s frown.
“You did not wish to marry?”
“I did not expect it.”
“Ah, Meg. I see that you are the daughter of Sir Eustace Lawrence, barrister!” She smiled. “What did you wish for, then?”
“I wished-for him to love me”
“But you have your wish, Meg. You are all to Charles. He could not love you more.”
Meg sat up straighter in the well-plumped chair.
“Where is he then?”
“Ah! He hurts you, when he would never want to. So, I must tell you something more of Charles-and of men” She turned to the maid, who had returned with a tray bearing steaming cups of broth and a basket of rolls. “I hope you do not mind, Meg. My physician tells me that I must have these small meals at the odd hours. You will join me?”
Meg nodded, and accepted some broth. Her appetite was returning, or the broth was exceptionally good. It tasted delicious.
“Now-” the duchess said, “I know only that Charles is with his cousins tonight. I cannot say where. Not at just this hour. Perhaps at White’s club. They may stay there very late. But then they will return to Myles’s house. That is Hayden’s, ma belle,” she added at Meg’s quick frown. “This house is not too far from here. But please, do not think to go running to him.”
“Am I … a prisoner here then, Therese?”
“No, no. If you wish to leave, you may. I hope you will not wish to leave. You may return to your father, you may go even to Sutcliffe, I cannot stop you. But thoughts of Charles should stop you. Because you may endanger yourself, and you will certainly endanger Charles. He means to duel. If you go to Sutcliffe, Charles will find it tres docile, and Sutcliffe will find it easier.”
“You have known of his plans-all this time?”
The duchess shook her head.
“No, Meg-my Charles has told me very little, when he used to tell me all. But I am most pleased. Enchante!” She smiled.
“But-this duel! He told me he had pledged to you not to go to war, yet you condone a duel?”
“Ah, ma belle … Of course I fear for him. Mon petit Charles! But he is a man. He would not choose this path if he did not believe it right and trust himself capable. You are part of him now-of his honor. He must have you safe. I pray Charles also will be safe. He does this for you, Meg, because he loves you”
“I did not want him to do this.”
“Of course you did not. But you think it is wrong?”
“It … repels me. It is not … It is not that I think Sutcliffe is good. What he did to my father cannot be forgotten, will never be forgotten. He deserves to suffer, perhaps to die. I have thought of murdering him myself, Grandmere! But it must not be on his … on Cabot’s conscience. What a terrible gift for me to give to him! Do you understand?”
“I understand very well-that you have both tried to give each other much, and that you have not yet had the pleasure of discovering this for yourselves” She looked kindly at Meg, who had set her cup of broth aside and pulled the soft blanket comfortingly up to her chin. “This concern for the conscience-is a good concern. But I think honor is more. I have known men who believed that they could surrender honor for love, or for money, or perhaps for conscience. But they are broken. They are never the same. You must comprehend, Meg. Charles is a serious man. The only thing he will fear is that you will not forgive him.”
“Forgive him?”
“For forcing you to this-to marriage. And for pushing Sutcliffe to this.”
“Sutcliffe pushes himself. He is-obsessed.”
“L’idee fixe. Oui. It is a madness. And yet he is not mad. I cannot comprehend. His desire to possess is great. It is most unlike Charles. With Charles, the wish to give is much greater than the wish to take. He will cherish you. His loveis a man’s love.”
“But surely this … our marriage … must prevent a duel?”
“Ah! Je regrette-non. The marriage protects you. And kept you from a most unfortunate choice. Had you gone to Sutcliffe, you would have ruined yourself-you would have killed Charles. Does he know that you love him, ma belle? I think he would not believe you could love him and give yourself to Sutcliffe.”
I … have explained to him”
“Bon.” Again she smiled. “You are a surprise to him, Meg. You were not to act, you see. He did not plan it. And how
Charles plans! Since he was a boy. At twelve years, he lost his father, who fought Bonaparte. Then his grandfather, a noble from Milan, died imprisoned in France. Again by Bonaparte! Everything of the family Cabot is destroyed. Soon his mother, my daughter, is taken by the typhus” The duchess looked to the fire. “He was only fourteen when he came to stay at last with us at Braughton, and my dear husband passed within the year.” She shook her head. “So much of home-to slip so quickly from him! I think this is why he builds, why he must arrange the earth. The trees and streams must go here just so, where he would place them, oui?” She smiled. “But some things he does not touch. They please him. C’est interessante, West-ce pas? That he has also this understanding. There must be certain freedom.” She roused herself from contemplating the fire.
“But now you are his home, Meg. The Englishman fights for his home-his castle, yes? Charles is stubborn. He chose this course, I think, soon after meeting you. He has known from the first.
“The duelingit is terrible,” the duchess admitted. “But is it not better than the family disputes, the feuds that last for generations? Your brother was, he is still, much at risk. My own brother dueled twice. For those in a certain position … of a certain standing, it is a form of law. No one will touch the Earl of Sutcliffe in your father’s courts. They have not done so, have they, ma belle? They have not because of his station. Yet he cannot be permitted to continue.”
“Charles … would not leave England with me,” Meg said.
“Never! This is not right. Why should you leave your home?”
“If Charles does not … if he should not survive, Sutcliffe will take me anyway”
“No, no, Meg. If such should occur, and it will not, my son Braughton would see Sutcliffe banished forever! Do you understand? You are now of the house, of the family. But Charles,” she said firmly, “will succeed”
Meg wanted that assurance. But she could not trust it. And despite the warm fire and the hot broth, she felt a chill.
“You are very certain of the outcome, Grandmere.”
“Bien sur! I know Charles,” she said with a smile.
“Yes. But I fear that I know Sutcliffe.” Meg again looked to the fire. “How long do you think we must wait?”
“I expect to hear from one of my grandsons in the morning. They are very close. They will see to each other. You have met Myles, yes? But David, his brother, I think you do not know.”
“I met him today. The major. Lord David.”
The duchess nodded.
“My happy David … I have seen him only once these five years! He laughs still, but he is sad. He has lost so many friends. All he knows is war. Now my son Braughton hopes to employ him-to marry the neighbor’s girl! I think I must do something…” She tapped one fragile finger against the arm of her chair. “Braughton toys with marriage. It is for him a tool!”
“Cabot-Charles said just this evening that marriage was nothing-a construct “
“Did he say so? He thought to sway you with such nonsense? No, I think he tries to tell you how you may perceive it-if you wish to end it. He must have been angry when he said this. He did not mean it. I hope you will not wish to end it, ma cherie”
“I do not wish to end it”
“No, I did not think so. You must convince Charles.”
I cannot convince him of anything, Meg thought desperately, when he is not here.
“Yes, I am most pleased with Charles,” the duchess said, again tapping a finger as she looked to the fire. “But Myles! Mon Dieu!”
“Why should Lord Hayden disappoint you? He ismuch esteemed.”
“Esteemed? Yes, most clever, most amusing-all the fashion! But where is the purpose-the passion? He is close to Charles, to David, but all else is nothing. His father-my son, requires much from him-and receives what he expects. But it is all duty, duty. I fear Myles will wed someone very grand, very cold, to please his father!” She shook her head. “Quel desastre! But now he is tired of his Grandmere. Que dois je faire?
Meg felt for the duchess, but thought the day’s wedding should not be upheld as a model.
“Ma belle Meg, I have been thoughtless. I have indulged myself with talk-with an old woman’s complaints-when you are tired. I must let you sleep” With the support of her cane, she moved to rise from her seat. Meg pushed her blanket aside and rose to help. She took the elderly woman’s left arm.
“It has been a pleasure, Grandmere. You must not think you have tired me”
As she leaned fully on her cane, the duchess withdrew her arm from Meg’s grasp and reached to caress her cheek.
“Ma cherie, you are most gracious, and so tall! Like Charles. Like his cousins. But now everyone in life is tall to me!”
“You appear to be in excellent health, Grandmere,” Meg said.
“Ah! You tell the tall tales-also like my grandsons! Well, it is better to hear this `gammon’ as Myles would say.” Again she shook her head. “His language-it is incomprehensible! And your Charles insists he will not speak French with me. He says that I must be the English duchess! He is so stern. Meg, ma cherie, I hope you will speak French with me. I am old. I would find it most agreeable.”
“As you wish, Grandmere,” she said.
“Tu es charmante, Meg. You will see-your Charles adores you. He will make you most happy. And he will be a fine father.” As Meg blushed, the duchess touched her on the cheek. “Now you must dream of him. We shall hear from him in the morning.” And Meg’s face was still warm as the duchess departed.
has attempted to hold the dream-of Meg at Brookslea, in her blue riding habit, walking toward him across the lawn. But she slipped further and further away, though he wished her closer, and he heard voices-his cousins, speaking low and urgently. As the carriage lurched, Chas realized where he was, and that the tense conversation about him had nothing to do with the morning’s mission.
It was still dark. He kept his eyes closed and stayed propped against the squabs, nestled into his comfortable corner. He wanted to remain as calm and quiet as possible. But he was also, quite frankly, curious.
“I don’t remember a girl,” David was saying. “Just great noisy bands of boys. Always missing teeth and scuttling about the countryside in dirt and patches. Look at one of ‘em the wrong way and you’d risk reprisals-painful ones to boot. Or some brand of vexation”
“The girl’s the youngest. With four-no, five brothers”
“Egad. Do you recall her looks? Missing teeth, perhaps?”
“All the Caswells look alike. Skinny little dab of a thing. Hair rather-oh, mouse, I suppose. I don’t recall any missin’ teeth, though there must have been at one time, of course. From all accounts she turned out well enough”
“Well enough,” David echoed. “Then what’s wrong with her?”
“Wrong with her? I shouldn’t think anythin’s wrong with her-ceptin’ she has five brothers. One was in the Horse Guards, by the by.”
David snorted dismissively.
“Didn’t she take?” he asked.
“Not out yet. Been shunted off to schools for years”
“How old?”
“Just eighteen.”
“Hang it, Myles-I’m no nursemaid. Why’s father doing this?”
“He’s not done anythin’ yet. Merely suggested..
“In the manner of a command.”
“Good heavens, David. You may choose whomever you wish. Unlike some of us. And you will have the satisfaction of knowing you are chosen for yourself, and little else.”
“Do not sound so forlorn, Myles. You are well aware that half the females in the country would still find you adorable even if you weren’t Hayden”
“Adorable? You flatter me. And-poor boy-you are appallingly naive. I shall have to educate you.”
“You? Educate me?”
“Well-‘tis true you’ve spent untold hours in too many pestilent pits. But I’d wager they are nothing to the ton in season for tramplin’ a man’s spirits. I swear some ladies are so
fond of the married state they’re recirculatin’ !”
David smothered a laugh.
“Perhaps the word has passed. That anything in a skirt worth looking at, the Marquis of Hayden has looked at.”
“You make me out a regular roue”
“Aren’t you?”
“My dear David-have you been listenin’ to Grandmere?”
For a moment there was silence, then David asked,
“What’s father’s obligation to Caswell anyway? Why doesn’t he foist the brat on you? You’d be the logical choice as you … Ah!-I see. How convenient for you, Myles. I’ve been your dupe once more. Why, you’re worse than father with your scheming! Look here, I haven’t sold out yet, devil it. I’ve a mind to head back without even stopping at home. I’d rather be a pawn for Wellington than father.”
There was another pause.
“That would be cruel, David. They have missed you. And as for my schemin’ I understand the overture came from Caswell. ‘Twasn’t my idea at all.” “
“Caswell! I don’t recall ever harming the man! Perhaps a token apple from his orchards now and then … Begad! I’ve no interest in the unfortunate girl or anyone else. Why couldn’t you have taken my part in this?”
I thought it might be in your interest. From what Caswell implied … well, everyone wants you happy again.”
“Happy? I am happy. To be home-and let be! The problem with you, Myles, is that you’ve no idea how simple `happy’ can be. Some day you’ll find you don’t always know best. Then I shall happily laugh myself hoarse!”
“Your laugh is one of your rare charms, David. ‘Tis a pity, then, that I shan’t be hearin’ it.”
“Why, you arrogant popinjay. I ought to plant you a facer.”
“Fightin’s not always the best solution-”
“What a philosophy to claim here this morning!”
Again there was a pause.
“I note you do have some brawn on me, major. At least, we shall hope ‘tis muscle, not fat. But you forget I still hold the record at Jackson’s for rounds”
“That does seem like you, Myles-simply wearing down the rest of us ” There was a muffled laugh. “Though I still believe Chas could whip you-if he chose”
Quiet Meg Page 18
