And that’s when I knew. This is what all made sense. It wasn’t my soul, my heart, my thoughts, or my brain that he was attracted to. It was my shell.
Just as the realization hit me, my body floated up once again, away from his arms. He let me go easily, and I passed once more through his ceiling and roof, floating high above into the sky to travel slowly across town and float down to the ground once again.
I looked around and saw I stood right before the grave I had visited earlier, the one in our local cemetery, right at the spot where Parker had made his point.
“Don’t be scared,” a voice said kindly, “It’s just me.”
And out from behind a nearby tree walked Jimmy.
I gave a loud cry when I saw him and rushed to where he stood.
His arms opened as I ran to him and I flung myself within them. I wrapped my arms and legs around his whole body, absorbing his coolness and light, frantically kissing his lips, his cheeks, running my fingers through his hair. He held me tightly, returning the same fervor.
“I’ve missed you so much,” I cried.
“Not as much as I’ve missed you,” he whispered.
I don’t know how long we stayed like that. We hung on to one another as if we were both drowning and the other was a lifeline. My heart sobbed at the injustice of it all, at how I could have this amazing love with someone who wasn’t even alive. My body wept with relief at the feel of him against me. My soul cried with joy at this reunion, no matter how brief it may be, no matter that it was happening in my dream.
“I keep seeing the light, Roz,” he whispered into my hair.
“What light?” I asked, not really caring what he was talking about because it felt far too good to be in his arms once again.
“The light,” he said. “The one we see when we’re supposed to… you know… move on.”
I pulled away from him and dropped my feet to the ground. The grass was cold and wet beneath my bare feet.
“What do you mean, Jimmy?” I asked, feeling suddenly very afraid for myself.
“There’s a light,” he explained, “And it comes around every so often. It’s meant to usher me through to the other side, to Heaven, or the afterlife, or wherever it is I’m supposed to go.”
“Why now?” I asked as my insides turned as cold as the grass under my feet. “Have you ever seen it before?”
“Off and on since my death,” he said simply. “The first time was right after I died, but I didn’t understand I was supposed to go to it. I just watched it until it finally went away. The next time was right after your mother gave you heroin, and I knew I was supposed to go to the light then, and I knew what it was meant for, but I was afraid to leave you.”
I listened, not liking what I was hearing, and nodded for him to continue. I didn’t trust myself to open my mouth and try to produce words. I was afraid if I did, I’d begin screaming and never stop.
“And now, just this last week, it’s come three different times. I’m stuck here, behind this veil, Roz, and I can’t get you to see me and I can’t be a part of your life, and I’m worried that if I don’t go to the light, I’ll be stuck here forever.”
I began to shake from head to toe.
“No,” I whispered brokenly, “You can’t leave me, Jimmy!”
He ran his hands up and down my arms in a feeble attempt at soothing me.
“You’re not allowed to leave me,” I begged, “Please don’t go into the light, please.”
“I can’t keep staying here like this, stuck in this purgatory,” he said sadly.
“I’ll get Parker to remove the veil,” I said anxiously, “He’ll do it, I know he will! We have a plan!” I said, quickly, trying to convince him not to leave me, “Odie and The Pastels, they came up with a plan! They’re going to help us! Please, Jimmy,” I pleaded, “Please don’t give up yet. Please give us more time. It’ll work, I promise. Just… please… you can’t leave me yet.”
He pulled my quivering, whimpering form forward, until I melted into him, and he kissed the top of my head.
“I’m losing my mind Roz, being stuck like this. It’s worse than before, when you couldn’t see me. Everything is different now. It’s not just that you can’t see me, it’s that, other things can.”
I looked up at him. “What other things can see you?”
He shook his head and looked down. “Creatures. Evil things. I keep myself hidden from them, but… if I don’t go into the light soon, they’re going to find me.”
“Jimmy,” I said earnestly. “Please give me a little more time. Please?”
Troubled, and so obviously frightened that my heart was ripped apart, he nodded slowly. “I’ll try,” he said. “For you, I’ll try.”
I laid my head on his chest and clung to him.
“I love you,” I whispered to his heart.
“I love you, too, sweetheart,” he replied.
CHAPTER 40
The sound of soft chimes awoke me the next morning, and I was completely disoriented. It took me several long minutes to realize the sound was coming from my new phone and that I was at home, in bed, and no longer in the cemetery with Jimmy.
Jimmy.
My heart shattered into a million pieces all over again.
Please keep him away from the light, I prayed silently. Please let him stay here with me.
Please. Please. Please. Please. Please.
I felt so greedy and selfish for praying that. I knew it was probably better for a soul to pass on, to go into the light of Heaven than to linger around here on Earth, living an unlivable life. But I had just discovered what love was all about, and I’d found it with Jimmy. I wasn’t ready to lose him just yet. I couldn’t bear the thought of it.
I remembered my letter to him, the one I’d taken to the grave of James Dean. I had written, the impossible was now possible. I had to cling to that. I had to believe it. Otherwise, all was lost.
I had just come out from the shower when my phone alerted me to a message. It was from an unknown number and I smiled when I read it.
Unknown: Good morning sis! This is Drew. Now you have my number and no excuse not to give your big bro a call or a text once in awhile!
Me: Morning, big brother! Adding you to my contacts now!
I smiled as I saved him to my phone’s contacts. I was so grateful to the universe for bringing me into this family.
Drew: Perfect. Will I see you Saturday? It’s going to be a heavy day for me, will appreciate if you’re there.
Me: Absolutely. I wouldn’t be anywhere else.
Drew: That means the world. Thanks, sis. See you then.
Me: Hang in there, bro. See you soon.
***
School passed in a flurry of papers, tests, and pop quizzes. It was so difficult trying to keep my mind on the schoolwork in front of me, that I was relieved when lunch finally came around. I had some serious talking to do with Odie and The Pastels.
As soon as I sat down with them, I launched into the dream I’d had the night before, not leaving anything out. I even shared the part where I’d ended up being snuggled by Parker, much to my embarrassment.
But I didn’t dwell on it. Instead, I changed the topic immediately with my next few words.
“Jimmy’s seeing the light,” I said quietly, using my voice to emphasize just how important of a thing this was, “So whatever your plan is, it better be a good one!”
“Wait, he’s seeing the light?” Belle asked, “As in, the door to the other side?”
“Yes, that’s exactly what he called it, I think,” I said quietly.
The group of us kept our voices low so as not to be overheard by anyone else.
“Oh no,” Devon breathed sadly, “Roz, that means his spirit is going to pass on soon. You’ll have to prepare yourself for that.”
I shook my head.
“No,” I insisted, “He’s not going to pass through, he’s going to wait and give us time so we can drop the veil.”
Jess shoo
k her head.
“It doesn’t work that way,” she said sadly. “When the light comes for a soul, they almost always have no choice in the matter. Otherwise, if they did, we’d have a lot more ghosts all over the place.”
“If that’s true,” I argued, “Then why has he been able to deny it?”
“Probably because of his love for you,” said Erica, “But I wouldn’t count on it to work like that forever.”
I grew angry and watched as she ate her vegan spaghetti from a plastic container. I found myself wishing she’d spill the bright red sauce all over her perfect butter yellow outfit, but she didn’t. I sighed, realizing I was stupid for being so angry with my friends. None of this was their fault. They didn’t make up the rules of the universe, they just knew them.
“Alright,” I said dejectedly, “So what’s this plan you guys came up with?”
Odie perked up, looking excited.
“You lure Parker to a designated location,” she said, “promising him he can have your body or whatever silly thing he wants, and then-”
“I zap him.” Devon finished simply.
I stared at the both of them.
“That’s it?” I asked hopelessly. “That’s the big plan?”
“Or I freeze him,” Belle chimed in.
“Or I drown him,” Cindy said happily.
“Or I set him on fire!” Jess exclaimed.
“Or I steal the oxygen from his lungs and watch him suffocate to death,” Erica said darkly.
“What in the…?” I asked lamely, not bothering to finish my statement.
“They have elemental powers,” Odie explained, “So they each have their own ways of ending the douchebag!”
“Hold on, you’re talking about killing him?” I asked in disbelief.
“Well, we don’t believe in killing,” Cindy said, “But we do believe in maiming.”
I shook my head. “It’ll never work.”
“Why not?” Odie asked, “If these girls are there to protect you, nothing bad will happen.”
“You don’t understand,” I said, “Parker said he was… ugh… the master of my body. I was walking away and he said ‘stop,’ and my body obeyed, Odie. No matter how hard I fought it, I couldn’t move. I already know, whatever he says, I’ll do it. That’s why it won’t work.”
“Oh no,” Devon said softly, “Did he take any of your blood?”
I stared at her. “In a dream, a few weeks ago, yes. When I woke up in the morning, my hand was slashed open.”
I raised my palm to show her the red line still visible on my palm. It would be a scar, a permanent reminder of the supernatural life I was now entrenched in.
“And there we have it,” Jess whispered.
The Pastels looked at one another and then back to me.
“If he has your blood, he can control you forever,” Erica said.
“But only if you gave it willingly,” Belle added, eyeing me.
I dropped my head to the table in complete defeat.
“Ah! That’s it! We’re screwed!” Odie exclaimed.
I couldn’t disagree.
***
In Language Arts, I stared at the front of the class, not hearing a word my teacher said. I didn’t care, anyway. I was so lost now, so scared and hopeless. I had no idea how I could save Jimmy, especially knowing now that Parker had me in his control.
Stupid, stupid dreams! I thought angrily.
If I could somehow appeal to Parker, to his humanity, then maybe I stood a chance. Maybe, just maybe, if I approached him calmly, laid all my cards out on the table, showed him my heart, then maybe he would remove the spell, forget about wanting to use me for his necromancy project, and give me back my love.
I glanced across the aisle at him to find his eyes on me, staring at me in that hungry-like-a-wolf way of his. His blue-green eyes darkened and he licked his lips.
I turned away, disgusted.
No. Appealing to him would never work. He was all predator. If there was any humanity at all
in him, he’d probably sold it to the devil long ago. Everything was hopeless. I was going to lose Jimmy to the light, and end up losing my soul as well.
To quote the ever-articulate Odie, I was screwed.
CHAPTER 41
Odie: Stop worrying. We’re going to solve this. I’m not letting my best friend go down without a fight.
Me: I don’t care what happens to me, it’s Jimmy I’m worried about.
Odie: Fine. You worry about Jimmy. I’ll worry about you.
Me: Gotta go. The funeral’s beginning.
Odie: Give my best to Drew. Love you.
Me: Love you back.
It was a solemn occasion, yet uplifting, too. The church was filled to capacity with mourners, distant cousins, friends, and loved ones of the late Charisma Hampton. Drew stood tall and handsome in a crisp, black suit, as he helped bring in his mother’s gleaming mahogany casket with five other men. Once they had placed her on the stand at the front of the church, he patted the top of the casket for a moment, then turned to take his seat in the front row.
A minister spoke of the eternal love a mother has for her child, and compared it to the way God loved his Son and sent Him to die for the sins of all mankind. Next, a young lady sang an incredible rendition of “Amazing Grace,” acapella style, and moved the entire sanctuary to tears. Myself, included.
I may have lost my hope, but I hadn’t lost my ability to be overcome by such exquisite emotion.
Drew gave a eulogy and everyone cried and laughed, and cried some more. He shared his favorite stories of his mother, and ended it with his promise that he would keep going.
Just like what he’d promised in my dream.
After the funeral, she was laid to rest in the local little cemetery where I had visited this past week. The tombstone of Leonard Graves wasn’t too far away, and after everyone had left, I walked over to it silently.
I didn’t know who this man had been. I’d been born decades after his death. However, I had experienced something here, right before his grave, and I felt like I owed it to the man to pay my respects.
I stood there for a few moments, my long black dress flowing in the slight breeze around me, when there was a hand at my elbow.
“Are you an acquaintance of Mr. Graves?” Drew asked jokingly, “Or just a lover of ornate tombstones?”
I chuckled and gave him a hug.
“That was a beautiful funeral,” I said. “You holding up okay?”
He shrugged. “Some days are better than others. But today was my goodbye to my Ma, and I know she would have been pleased.”
“She loved you more than anything,” I said softly.
He tilted his chin and eyed me.
“You say that like you know it,” he said.
Now it was my turn to shrug.
“I guess I do,” I said simply.
“Come on, everyone’s mad at me for not having a reception, so we’re all going back to your house for an impromptu after-party.”
“An after-party?” I asked. “Funerals have after-parties?”
He grinned. “They do now. And I need to celebrate my Mama. What do you say, Sis?”
I linked my arm in his and said, “I’m down, Bro.”
Laughing and walking arm-in-arm, we walked back to where the family stood waiting.
***
“How can you deny pepperoni?” I shouted half-heartedly, “It’s a classic!”
“Because my palate is by far more sophisticated than yours,” Drew replied.
The group of us sat in the living room surrounded by boxes and boxes of pizzas. We had ordered seven larges, each with different toppings, to accommodate our own family and the few mourners who had decided to tag along. Joyful, uplifting music spilled softly from the speakers in the living room, and I was thankful Mitch had chosen something a bit more mainstream and happy than his usual metal. Bonnie poured wine and coffee from the kitchen for the grown ups, and soda for me and Vincent.
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Everyone who had had the privilege of knowing Charisma shared their memories of her.
It was exactly what Drew needed.
“I can’t help if I’m a traditional sort of girl,” I said. “Pepperoni is the most popular. Millions of Americans can’t be wrong!”
“That proves it. You’re a conformist!” Drew said laughingly.
“You couldn’t be further from the truth if you tried!” I argued.
Our playful banter was the the stuff that had everyone around us chuckling until the last few mourners left and it was just me, Drew, Mitch, and Bonnie. Vincent had had enough of the after-party long ago and was fast asleep in his bed.
“Okay then,” he said thoughtfully, “If that’s true, what type of music do you listen to?”
“Everything,” I said honestly. “But I prefer rock.”
He nodded. “So do millions of other people,” he said. “What is your stance on politics?”
“They all suck,” I replied.
He laughed. “Okay, then, do you believe in ghosts?”
I fell silent and dropped my gaze.
“Yes,” I said quietly, “I do.”
“Ah, now we’re getting somewhere!” He said chuckling. “Have you ever seen a ghost, or do you just believe in them?”
I looked at him with my eyes wide, then glanced at Mitch and Bonnie who sat watching us. They were both smiling, interested in what my viewpoint was on the phenomenon of ghosts.
“I’ve seen them,” I admitted, “And before you ask who it was, don’t bother, because that’s all I’m saying about the subject!”
Drew looked at me, his smile leaving his face.
“Wait a sec, you really have seen them, haven’t you?” He asked.
I nodded. “I dream about them too,” I said quietly. “I dreamed of you and your mother saying goodbye the night she died.”
He stiffened. “No you didn’t,” he said firmly. “That’s not funny, Roz.”
Rest in Peace Roz: The R.I.P. Series Book 1 Page 25
