by K E Osborn
“Girls, I wanted to surprise you…What the fuck?” Dad’s voice rings clear and I open my eyes wide and Danger’s head shoots around to see Dad standing in the hotel room gawking at the weird position Danger has me bent in.
Danger quickly pulls out of me and jumps off the bed standing to the side looking mortified holding his junk as I grab the sheets and pull them up to cover myself.
“What the fuck is this? Danger, what the fuck?” Dad says standing there with his eyes fully open like he’s about to explode.
Danger grabs a pillow and covers his crotch. “I’m sorry, I never meant—”
“You never meant to fuck my daughter? What the actual fuck? I can’t believe this. You think you can bed my daughter for a one-time thing?” Dad asks and I sit on the bed mortified as I look at Danger, who’s visibly shaking.
“It’s not a one-time thing, Colt,” Danger says and Dad’s nostrils flare while he turns red looking at Danger like he wants to actually kill him. His fists clench at his sides and he starts racing toward him.
“Dad!” I yell out as Danger stands there bracing for the impact.
Dad grabs Danger by the throat and starts to drag him.
“Oh my God. Dad…Dad, stop it!” I yell as I gather the sheet and wrap it around me and follow them as Dad drags a choking Danger out of the hotel room completely naked.
“Dad, please stop it. You’re being a jerk. Stop!” I yell as he pulls him into the hall and holds him by the throat up against the wall. I claw at Dad’s hands to get him to let go, but he’s choking Danger and he’s turning bright red.
“Dad, for God’s sake, stop it! Please, stop it,” I yell as the hot tears pool in my eyes and flood down my face. My dad is in a rage, and I don’t think anything is going to stop him from actually following through and killing Danger right now.
“Help!” I scream so anyone in the other rooms can hear as I cry hard while Danger struggles to breathe.
Annie and Aston race out and they both cover their mouths as they take in the terrifying scene in front of them.
“Dad, let him go,” Annie yells.
Mum flies out of her hotel room and gasps looking at what Dad’s doing. I claw at his hand trying to release it as he turns to look at Annie and Aston. Something in Dad’s face clicks and he turns from pure anger to devastation and with that realisation he releases his hand from around Danger’s throat.
I cry hard as Danger’s body falls to the floor. Racing to the ground to support him, I hold onto him tightly trying to comfort him as he takes in much-needed air.
“Wait! Were you two in a room together, too?” Dad yells at Annie.
“Stop right there. You do not get to be angry at Aston. I know you’re pissed about your little girls growing up but Dad we’re adults, and we have men in our lives now and you definitely cannot stop us from seeing them.”
Mum rushes toward Dad stopping him from reaching Aston. “Colt, stop!” she says tugging on his arm. He looks back at Mum and shakes his head.
“And you’re okay with this?” he yells and Mum shrugs.
“They’re adults now, babe. Annie and Aston are a couple. It’s okay for them to spend time together—”
“Yeah, what about Ella, huh? Her and Danger definitely aren’t together, right? I don’t need her slutting herself around with the likes of him,” he says looking at me. I can’t help but continue to cry as I comfort Danger, who’s still recovering from Dad’s aggressive attack.
“Dad, you need to remember we’re adults. We are allowed to have relationships, and that means we are allowed to have sex—”
“Jesus Christ,” he murmurs running his hand through his hair.
“We are even allowed to get tattoos because by law we’re all legally grown Dad, and you have to let go a little. I know we’re your little girls and we will always be. But Dad, little girls grow up,” Annie says trying to calm the situation. I’m glad she’s taking charge because I certainly am not capable of that right now.
His anger subsides and he turns his back to Annie and exhales, resting his hands on the wall and taking some calming breaths. “So you’re telling me that you’re both old enough to have sex now. Is that what you’re saying?”
Mum is standing there rubbing Dad’s back as I continue to rub Danger’s back as he continues breathing deeply.
“Yes Dad,” Annie says. “And you can’t take it out on the guys we have sex with, that’s not fair. If you’re angry yell at us, don’t beat the crap out of our boyfriends.”
He huffs and turns around resting his back against the wall and rubbing his face with his hands.
“I know this is hard Dad, but—”
“No...wait…what? What did you say about tattoos?” he asks looking directly Annie and so does Mum.
Annie shows Mum and Dad a tattoo she got last night, but I don’t care about that right now all I care about is Danger who’s sitting in the hall of the hotel naked and trying to catch his breath. I caress his face and look into his eyes as he looks past me like he isn’t even focussing. The look worries me and I’m starting to feel like this could be a big issue for us. Danger didn’t want Dad to know, now he does and he found out in a terrible way, I don’t know how Danger will deal with this.
“They’re my babies Lia, and I just don’t know how to cope with this, you know?” he says to Mum seeming all out of sorts. I know he’s hurting, but the way he treated me and Danger, well, I’m hurting too.
“I know, babe. C’mon. Come back to our room and we can talk about it,” Mum says pulling him away from us.
“You’re really both having sex?” he asks one more time turning around to face us all.
I glare at Dad while Danger just sits on the floor naked and looking a little lost. I can’t believe he manhandled Danger like that. I’m so angry right now.
“Fuck!” Dad says and turns around walking with Mum back to her room.
I stand up and try to pull Danger with me. He’s slightly unstable on his feet, but he stands up. I look over at Annie and notice her looking down at Danger’s cock. I move in front of him covering his junk and Annie giggles, I can’t help but smirk.
“Are you okay, mate?” Aston asks Danger and he nods.
“Yeah, I was more shocked than anything. I respect Colt, so this was a bit of drama that I didn’t need,” he says and then steps out from behind me and walks into the hotel room, leaving me out in the hall. I exhale furrowing my brows and shake my head.
“Great, now he’s going to shut down again,” I whisper to no one in particular and turn following him into the hotel room and close the door.
Once inside I find Danger sitting on the bed with his head in his hands. I walk over and sit down next to him. I go to wrap my arm around his shoulders, but he flinches.
“Hey, it’s just me,” I say and he exhales and nods. “Are you okay?” I ask and he shakes his head.
“No Ella, I’m not fucking okay,” he says and stands up walking over to his clothes and starts to get dressed.
I bite my bottom lip and swallow hard. “Okay, well, I know that was horrible but can you just talk to me?” I ask sitting on the bed watching him as he angrily puts his clothes on. I can feel the disconnect creeping up on us already and I hate it so much. “Danger?” I ask and he pulls his shirt over his head.
“I need some time to think,” he says bending down to put on his boot.
“What does that mean?” I ask and he says nothing. I fold my arms over my chest and hold onto myself for support. “Danger talk to me!” I almost yell getting frustrated with his cold shoulder attitude. My eyes well with tears and I can’t help it as I start to cry again. “Danger please, just sit down and talk to me. I’m sorry about Dad, but this doesn’t change us, though, right?” I ask standing up and walking over to him as he finishes putting on his other boot.
“I told you, Ella, I need to think,” he says and I put my hand out grabbing his arm. He flinches away from me and starts to walk off.
“Da
nger, seriously?” I ask standing in the middle of the hotel room watching him walk away. “Danger?” I call out, but he opens the door and walks out without saying another word and without turning back. With the slam of the door, my heart cracks open and blood oozes from every broken piece. I know how embarrassing that must have been for him, it was embarrassing for me too. But to leave me here like this without talking about it and to leave without any idea of where we stand, that’s just cruel. I burst into tears and flop down onto the bed crying into the pillow that he slept on last night.
I gave Danger the space he so obviously needs, but that left me feeling alone and entirely abandoned. The next day I tried to call him because I couldn’t find him anywhere, but he didn’t answer. I feel like he’s shutting me out and it’s only making me angry. It’s not my fucking fault Dad walked in trying to surprise me and Annie and found me bent in half with Danger giving it to me. I know Danger’s embarrassed, I know he respects Dad and he feels like Dad won’t respect him now, but seriously, what’s with the avoidance? I’m starting to think things would’ve been easier if I’d just chosen Chad. But then again love isn’t meant to be easy.
Wait, love? Is that what this is? Do I love Danger? Is that why even though all the odds are stacked against us, I keep going back to him? Because I fucking love the arsehole?
Man, I’m thoroughly screwed!
I need to find him, but we have to fly out. So I make my way to the jet with my head hanging low. In the pit of my stomach, it’s telling me things are not okay with me and Danger. I sit down on the jet and Annie sits next to me and it’s so weird, it’s like the tables have turned. I’m the miserable one and she’s the one who’s happy and in a blissful state. Being back with Aston has indeed turned her world back on its right axis.
“Hey, how you doing?” Annie asks wrapping her arm around my shoulders.
“He still won’t talk to me,” I say and she frowns.
“I saw him earlier, he looks terrible if that helps at all?” she says and in some twisted way it does help.
“I just don’t know what to do, he keeps avoiding me.”
“Well, when we land in Moscow, go find him. Go to his hotel room and bang on the door until he talks to you. It’s not fair that he’s shutting you out,” she says and I nod and take in a deep breath.
“Love sucks,” I say and she smiles.
“Yep, it certainly does,” she says wrapping her arms tighter around me and cuddling with me.
After a two hour, very long flight, we arrive at the hotel and I know Recoil arrived before us so they’re here in the hotel. After putting all my luggage away, I go in search heading straight to his room and bang on the door. There’s no answer. I wonder if he’s in there and just not answering. I figure if I ring his phone I’ll hear it and then I’ll know if he’s inside. So I call, but I can’t hear anything. I take a deep breath as the phone rings and rings, but he doesn’t answer, so I walk off down to the restaurant. He isn’t in there, so I head to the bar. I walk in and see him sitting at the bar drinking alone and he looks deep in thought. My heart starts to beat rapidly at the sight of him and my breathing hitches. He looks so good, but desperately distraught at the same time. The sight unnerves me. I take a deep breath and walk toward him taking a seat next to him. He casually glances my way and his face falls and he exhales, which makes my stomach churn.
“I don’t know what I’m meant to do, Ella,” he says honestly. I bite my bottom lip, not knowing what he means by that.
“In what way?” I ask and he turns to face me and looks me in the eyes.
“Colt is massive. He’s huge in this industry. He could make or break Recoil, and if I fuck this up because I fucked his daughter, I’d never forgive myself,” he says and it’s like a knife straight through my heart.
“Right, so I am just a fuck then?” I ask and he winces and shakes his head.
“No. Sorry, shit, that’s not what I meant—”
“Then what did you mean?” I ask tears welling in my eyes.
“I mean that I respect your dad, right? And right now he thinks so poorly of me that I don’t know what it means for my career, or for my relationship with you. I don’t know if I should just quit while I’m ahead. Well, not ahead, because I’m so far behind it’s not funny,” he says exhaling then taking a long drink of his amber liquid.
I exhale and swallow hard. “So you’re rethinking us?” I ask and a knot forms in my throat and my stomach starts to churn.
“I don’t know,” he says and I nod and bite my bottom lip.
“Well, we’re on tour for the next five months, it’s going to be hard to avoid each other.”
“I can’t avoid you, sugar. I care about you too much, but I think that we need to be honest about what this is. Your dad is never going to respect me. The long distance didn’t work for us last time. I know I wasn’t great at it, I don’t expect you were either—”
“What does that mean?” I ask dreading his answer, but knowing in my heart that he wasn’t faithful to me while he was in the states. But I can’t really say anything because I kissed Chad. But I know from the look on Danger’s face that he did more than kissing.
“I don’t think I need to explain, just know that I feel bad about it and I want to be with you Ella, but the distance is an issue. Your father is an issue. Everything seems against us, and if five months is all we have together then I guess we better make the most of it, right?” he asks and I bite my bottom lip and nod knowing he’s probably right. I guess this was always going to be the outcome for us. Distance is an issue and now with my dad knowing and being on the defensive will only make things harder.
“So five months is all we have?” I ask and he frowns and takes another sip then puts his glass on the bench.
“I don’t know what the future holds for us, sugar, but I think that we need to make these five months count,” he says and a tear runs down my cheek. He swallows hard and wipes it away and I nod and fake a smile.
“Okay,” I say and I’m glad I didn’t come in all guns-a-blazing and tell him that I love him. That would just make this so much worse.
He picks up his drink again and chugs it down and waves at the bartender for another. I sit in an awkward silence saying nothing as the bartender brings another drink. Danger starts to drink it and I can’t stand the awkward tension building between us. I stand up needing to do something, anything, to ease the tension. He looks at me and I plead with my eyes for him to say something, anything, but he says nothing and turns his head and drowns himself in the amber liquid.
My bottom lip trembles. I don’t want to cry in front of him, so I turn and walk away. I hesitate waiting for him to call out to me, but he doesn’t and it’s like a red hot poker stabbing me right through my extremely fractured heart. I walk back to the elevators and ride up to my hotel room trying my hardest not to cry. But as hard as I try, I can’t stop the tears from running down my face and pooling at my chin. And for the first time in a while I really want to go to Chad. I want to see him, hold him and cuddle with him and let him tell me that everything will be all right, but I know that wouldn’t be fair on anyone right now. So I have to suffer in silence and grieve for my relationship with Danger the only way I know how. On my own.
With the knowledge that the five months is all we have together, Danger and I have been hooking up every couple of nights or so, but the intensity isn’t there like it was. I feel the love for him, it’s still there, but I’m not feeling anything back from him. He’s pulling away because at the end of the tour he will be gone and we will probably never talk again, and that thought is slowly killing me. Annie’s so wrapped up in Aston that I have no one to talk to, but I really need to speak with someone. I feel like I’m completely alone on this tour and feel like the only thing I can do is turn to Chad. He said he’d always be here for me and right now I need him.
We’re in Denmark and as I walk into the green room, I see Chad is there by himself. Perfect opportunity. I walk over
and sit down next to him and he looks at me and smiles.
“You okay?” he asks and I shake my head.
“I’m sorry for not being around,” I say and he swallows hard and shakes his head.
“I’m sorry too, I just wish we could find a happy medium to sit at, you know?” he says and I nod.
“I know exactly what you mean.”
“I miss talking to you, I miss just being around you. Danger is always there, and after what happened last time on tour with our almost fight I don’t want to interfere,” he says and I huff and shake my head.
“Well, don’t worry Danger said that after this tour we’re over anyway, so it doesn’t even matter,” I say.
“What do you mean?” he asks and his eyebrows curve upward.
“He said it’s too hard, the distance, my dad, everything is stacked against us and that this five months is all we have left, so to make the most of it while we can,” I say and he shakes his head as my eyes well with tears.
“I’m sorry Ella, I know you really care for him,” he says.
I nod and a tear falls down my cheek. “I think I love him,” I reply.
Chad falters and his forehead wrinkles. “Right,” he says looking down at the ground and swallowing hard.
“But it doesn’t matter, it’s over. I have five months and then we’re done for good,” I say and Chad exhales wrapping his arm around me for comfort.
Danger walks in and looks at me and then at Chad. He notices Chad’s arm around me and he huffs and his nostrils flare like he’s angry. He shakes his head and walks back out again.
“You wanna go after him?” Chad asks and I shake my head and exhale.
