It was this honesty and passion that prompted her to begin reading the Bible every night before bed. In all the years she had read the Bible beside David, she had never seen how personal it was. Questions were buzzing around in her head, and she was dying to ask someone about them, but she knew they would probably think she was silly. So she kept silent . . . but she also kept reading.
They were only two speed bumps in her new life. The first was David’s lawyer, James Meyer, who was still pestering Lisa for Kristina’s address. He had finally allowed Lisa to forward a letter to her, which stated that she needed to contact him posthaste in regard to the settlement of David’s estate. David had left specific instructions for the disposition of his estate, and Mr. Meyer assured her he would be relentless in fulfilling the last wishes of his client. Her first response was to crumble the offensive thing and throw it away. But she eventually pulled the thing from the trash, and smoothing out the wrinkles, wrote a reply and mailed it to Lisa.
The second speed bump was Nathan. Though they no longer were at odds with each other, he continued to pop up in her life at unexpected times. Every time he did, she found herself relaxing ever so slightly under the warmth of his personality, only to be reminded of the foolishness of her past choices with men.
Her fourth Sunday in Hamilton found her at another fellowship lunch after service. After filling her plate, she turned to find a seat, only to find Nathan blocking her path. He took her plate before she could protest, and settled her down at a chair near his. Over the next hour, her defensive wall was assaulted with a barge of charming smiles as he teased the other two ladies sitting next to them. His blue eyes sparkling with laughter, and his infectious good humor caused her wall to crack the slightest bit. She soon found herself joining in the good-natured banter. She was brought back to reality when Nathan again began to ask her questions about her life back in New York.
After fifteen minutes of artfully dodging any personal questions, she excused herself and said her goodbyes, leaving Nathan wishing he hadn’t brought up New York. Kristina, on the other hand, was glad he had. She had been fooled too many times by charming, fun-loving guys who trampled ruthlessly on her tenderly placed trust. She was happy with her new life and all the joy it was bringing her. The last she needed was for it to be ruined again.
Two days later, as Kristina stepped outside the school to head home, she sighed at the warm sunlight enveloping her and delighted in the success with her students. Though she would never admit it to Nathan, he had caused her to doubt whether she would be able to get the students to accept her challenge of more demanding work. With the exception of Bobby Swanson and a few of his friends, the kids began to open up to her after the first week. Despite her high expectations, they met her challenges, even though it was sometimes only begrudgingly. Every year, she always had at least one or two students who fell in love with literature, and this year one of those students was Barbara. She immediately liked the girl, and was amazed by the young woman’s depth and insight that emerged over the first couple of weeks.
“There you are, Ms. Talbot!” Barbara raced to catch her just as Kristina reached the sidewalk.
She smiled at the young woman, and the two began walking side by side. “What can I do for you?”
“A couple of the students and I were wondering if we could have an after-school study session with you.” She flipped her hands around in circles as if trying to spin her thoughts into something tangible. Whenever Barbara was excited, she began thinking faster than the words could form on her lips, and she would often do this gesture with her hands. It was a habit that Kristina noticed within the first few days, and it always made Kristina smile because the girl reminded her so much of herself.
“All the students aren’t enjoying the stuff as much as we are, but we . . . the we that are into literature . . . would really like to go deeper into some of the stuff we are studying, but we don’t want to drag everyone else down who’s not with it, you know what I’m saying?” Barbara stopped and turned as a car roared next to them.
Groaning, she plucked her hands down on her hips and glared at the dark tinted windows of the Camaro. Before the passenger side window fully rolled down, Barbara growled, “What do you want!”
Bobby smiled from behind the wheel. His smile sent a shiver down Kristina’s spine. “Well, seeing as it is about to rain, I thought I would offer the two of you a ride.” His eyes raked the two of them up and down before he added, “Though it might be fun to see you all get wet.”
Not only was Kristina appalled at the young man’s nerve, but her skin crawled as though his eyes had actually been his hands. “Oh, my gosh, Bobby! I can’t believe you just said that to a teacher . . .” Barbara began, but Kristina placed a restraining hand on her arm.
“Bobby, we do not need a ride, you can just continue on.” Kristina said in what she hoped was a firm voice, and then, with a look at Barbara, the two began walking away. Bobby called out, “Are you sure? The lightning can be rough around here, not to mention the thunder.” He revved his engine, causing the two women to jump.
“Bobby, I sincerely hope you are not out bothering these women,” a voice said from behind them. Turning, Kristina smiled and sighed in relief. For once, the sight of Nathan coming her direction was a welcome one.
Bobby glared at him briefly, and then pinned an icy stare on Barbara when Nathan placed his arms protectively around the two women’s shoulders. Without another word, the boy sped off, kicking dust up behind his wheels.
“Mr. M., are we ever glad to see you!” Barbara said, “I mean, I’m used to him, but you wouldn’t believe what he said to Ms. Talbot!”
Interrupting her, Kristina said, “Well, the important thing is he’s gone.” Kristina stepped out from underneath the comforting, but unnerving, weight of Nathan’s arm.
Kristina turned a troubled look to Barbara and asked, “You said you are used to him. Does he bother you like that often?”
“Yeah, he is always cornering me because I refuse to go out with him. He’s such an arrogant, conceited, egotistical . . . ahhh!” she finished, her face flaming with anger.
Kristina’s face was filled with concern as she turned toward Nathan. “Thank you for your help,” she said.
“Not a problem. Why don’t you girls come with me? I’ll give you a ride home,” he said with a smile.
“You go ahead; I think I’ll walk home.” Kristina declined, but they both looked at her with puzzled looks on their faces.
“In the rain?” They asked in unison.
Looking at the sky, her face was the one to take on the puzzled look. There were a few dark clouds in the sky, but sun was beaming down. Its warm arms enveloping them in the afternoon heat, and that pleasant but evasive fragrance that occasionally filled the air was tickling her senses with delight. It seemed like such a glorious day for a walk.
“Can’t you smell it?” Barbara asked.
Kristina laughed. “Is that what that smell is? All these weeks I have been trying to figure out what plant or flower gives off such a wondrous fragrance, and all along it was rain.”
Nathan took a long whiff of the air. “Fragrance? It smells like wet dirt.”
“Rain doesn’t smell like this where I come from. And it smells heavenly to me,” she said.
“Hey, you know, it does smell really good,” Barbara chimed in. “I stayed one summer up in Oklahoma with my cousin. Whenever it rained there, it just smelled like mold."
They all laughed as they headed toward Nathan’s truck. As Nathan opened the door, Barbara said, “You go in first, Ms. Talbot, I’m the first stop.”
Kristina slid to the middle of the seat, and instantly felt uncomfortable so close to Nathan. Whenever his arm would brush hers, she wanted to scream from the tension within her. She almost jumped out and walked home, but before they could even leave the school’s parking lot, it began to rain.
“So, Ms. Talbot, you never did get to answer me because of El Jerko. What did you
think of our idea?” Barbara smiled at Kristina, her face beaming with the excitement of youth, oblivious to the inner turmoil roiling inside of Kristina.
“That sounds great,” Kristina said, “I’ll need to get approval from Principle Shirley. Just let me know when you guys plan to meet, and if you would like to use a room in the school, and I’ll let him know and get back with you.”
“Well, yeah that would be great, but we want you to lead it,” Barbara laughed and added, “We have to have someone who knows what they are talking about."
Taken back, she first wanted to decline, but then decided against it. The youth of this town were excited about literature, about broadening their minds and spending their own time, of their own free will, on studying. “I would be glad to. Let me talk with Mr. Shirley, and I’ll get back with you in a couple of days. When it’s all finalized, I’ll make announcements to all of my classes and we can go from there.”
As they pulled up in Barbara’s driveway, the young girl hugged her teacher and then giggled, “I’m sorry, I was just so excited! I can’t wait to tell the others.” With that, she hopped out of the truck and dashed up the path to the door.
Sliding over, Kristina laughed. “She sure is a bundle of energy.”
“That’s for sure. She is head cheerleader, captain of the debate team, one of my best sopranos, and if I haven’t fallen lax in my eavesdropping skills, she's roped you into something too.”
“She wants to start something of a literary club,” Kristina responded.
“Really, like a book club?” Nathan asked, “My mom would like to get in on something like that.”
“Well, sort of. It would be a book club that studies literature, not popular fiction.” she said as thoughts were spiraling through her mind. Turning fully toward him, she asked, “Is there not a book club at the library?”
“No…but you could start one,” he added with a smile. “There are quite a few people around here I can think of who would really enjoy that.”
“Really?”
“Sure, I’d like to go.”
“That would really be great,” she said, but then added somewhat soberly, “But I need to talk to Barbara first, it was her idea for the students. She might want to restrict it to students only.”
“Well, you could always have one for adults and one for students.”
“I might be able to talk Barbara into leading the group sometime down the line. She has such a profound insight when she studies a piece of literature, it’s amazing. She can even catch some of the subtle symbolism woven into the text. She has such a love for literature, she reminds me of myself at her age. I used to plague my English teachers with questions. When my friends were begging their parents to go to parties and concerts, I was begging my mom to allow me to go to book signings and poetry readings.”
He pulled into her driveway, and she gathered her things. “Thank you for the ride, and thank you for rescuing Barbara from Bobby."
“From the sound of things, it seemed like he was harassing you, too. Be careful around him,” Nathan warned, concern flooding his voice so much that she turned her full attention to him. “Bobby may seem like a harmless class clown, or a bully,” he continued, “but deep down, he has a heart of malice. He thinks very highly of himself, and his father owns a lot of property around town. The Swanson's are one of our wealthiest families. Bobby’s father has used his power to bail his son out of many scrapes, which makes Bobby feel like he is invincible. Bobby’s not one to get tangled alone with somewhere, especially if you are his enemy.”
A shiver ran down her spine as she thought of the boy’s cold eyes piercing Barbara, “I’m worried about Barbara. She said that this wasn’t a onetime occurrence for her, that he is always cornering her.”
“Bobby has been a thorn in her side since she became a cheerleader and refused to . . . ahh . . . support the quarterback,” he said, his face suffused with anger as he put the car in park and turned to Kristina. Nathan’s blue eyes turned stormy, “The only thing that holds him back is the coach, who threatened to kick him off the team if anything else happened.”
“What do you mean anything else? Has he done something to her before?” Panic edged Kristina’s voice.
“There was an incident last year involving a freshman girl who claimed he attacked her. We all thought he was going to be arrested, but then she dropped the charges and her family just up and moved.” He shrugged, and then said, "That’s when the coach threatened to kick him off the team if there was the slightest hint of trouble.”
“And the police didn’t do anything?”
“What could they do?” he answered. “Their hands were tied when she dropped the charges. This just fueled Bobby’s ego, and made him feel like he was invincible.”
“Can’t we do anything about him?” Kristina asked, the worry etched into her features.
“My father and I have talked with both him and his parents, but that is like talking to a brick wall. Sometimes I don’t think he’ll ever stop until he actually gets caught doing something, and then gets punished.”
“You aren’t suggesting we just wait for something bad to happen! Barbara is so full of life, love, and innocence. We can’t let him take that from her." She couldn’t keep the panic from her voice as she said, “Please, Nathan. We have to protect her.”
Nathan reached out and placed his hand on hers. “Don’t worry, she’s a smart girl, and she's tough.” With a chuckle he added, “She’s also stubborn, which goes a long way in handling herself.”
Kristina wanted to pull back from his touch, and warning bells sounded in her head.
“She’s been through a lot in her short life. She was just ten when her mom was diagnosed with cancer and given only six months to live, but she was a tough lady too.” He laughed softly and pulled her hand closer to him. “Barbara’s mom had tremendous faith, and would always tell the doctors not to put a timer on her life. She would be here on this earth as long as God still had a purpose for her. She died when Barbara was twelve, and George, Barb's father, just fell apart.” He smiled down at her, and said, “I had just graduated college and was heading off to seminary that fall, but I was helping lead the youth group that summer. She walked in to the church one afternoon, and found me making copies in the office. She began firing off questions, but the one that got me the most was when she asked what good was her mother’s faith if God wasn’t going to heal her.”
“What did you say?” Kristina asked, her voice barely above a whisper, wanting to know the answer for herself.
“I told her that her mom’s faith wasn’t just about God healing her, it was about God’s sovereignty in her life. She had faith that God is and will always be who He says He is in His Word.”
For Kristina, those words settled around her heart softly – not enough to take hold of, but just lingering there, as if they were looking for a place to rest.
Nathan continued with a smile, “All she said was ‘Humph!’ and she walked out the door." Nathan lifted their joined hands to his chest, covering his heart briefly as he remembered, “Oh man, I thought I blew it! I prayed so hard for her that night. But she came back the next day and told me, ‘I have to be honest with you, I haven’t been paying too much attention in church. I just went because my mom said I had to. But if my mom thought that Jesus was worth trusting her life and death with, I think I can too.’” Nathan’s eyes misted over as he finished in barely a whisper, “We sat there, and I told her about how much God loved her and her mother. That He sent his only Son to die for her sins because that is the only way any of us could ever get to Heaven. That Jesus’ blood was shed, not just so that we could go to Heaven, but He rose, so that we could have hope, and abundant joy and peace – while we are still here - even when things come crashing down around us.” Nathan wiped a tear from his eye with the back of their intertwined hands, and he finished, “That’s when she just looked at me and said, ‘My mom had that peace, even when she knew she was dying.’”
/> “After that day, Barb has lived her life totally on fire for God. She fell head over heels in love with Jesus, and led her father to the Lord a year later.” Stroking the back of her hand with his thumb, he said quietly, “Much like her mother, she lives for God’s purpose in her life – even when she doesn’t know what it is.”
Kristina was so lost in thought that she just sat there, staring at their intertwined hands laying in the space between them. His words echoed the longings in her heart - to have peace and hope that is not destroyed by circumstances.
When she looked up at Nathan, she was brought up short. Kristina wanted to look away from the depth of compassion in his eyes. She wanted to run inside and hide, she wanted to lock the doors of her house and her heart, refusing anyone entrance. But something halted her flight. Her soul cried out, thirsty for the promise she saw in Nathan’s eyes. Peace, rest, safety, all wrapped up and hers for the taking.
“Please,” she whispered unknowingly. Her vocal acknowledgment startled her, and she coughed as she released his hand, “Please, make sure you take care of Barbara."
Before he could say anything, she slid out of the truck.
“Wait!” she heard him call, but she ignored him and hurried into her house.
Inside, Kristina was crying softly on the couch. No, God, not again. I cannot trust another man with my heart. I cannot lay myself bare for another to rip me apart. I know what he offers looks good. I might be fooled into believing I can live happily ever after, but I know better. I know I can never trust anyone else with my heart ever again.
Miracles in Disguise (The Trampled Rose Series) Page 6
