by C. L. Stone
Wicked. But completely worth it.
The trail narrowed and flattened out, and the sun shone brighter. They emerged from the woods into a large grassy area: the top. Seok and Cai dropped their bags at a picnic table, pulling out their waters, but she went right to the look-out where the rocks jutted out, The land, from Vermont to Lake Champlain, and into New York state were patchworks of green and brown, and the roads, small blue rivers bisecting the fields. She could turn, 180 degrees, and see miles away.
“This was a good idea,” Seok said from behind her. He pulled her into his chest, resting his head on hers like he did. His arms crossed in front of her chest, keeping her close to him. “But I don’t like you standing so close to the edge.”
Eep. She hadn’t looked down, but his words made her glance directly in front of her. The rocks gave way to a steep drop off. A wave of vertigo made her knees weak and she grasped Seok’s arms hard. Suddenly, she thought about Tilly falling to her death, and morbidly wondered if a fall from this height would kill her.
Always, doom and gloom. Be grateful you’re alive to see this. You almost weren’t.
Cai’s warmth came next to her. Peering over the edge, he shuddered. “Nope. Too close. Back it up.”
Seok chuckled, his voice vibrating through her body before he stepped back, and then back again.
They stood in silence, all of them taking in the view until Seok asked, “How long do we stare at the mountains?”
Good question. Turning in Seok’s arm, she said, “We can be done. Are you ready to head down?” As the words left her mouth, a shrill ringing sounded. She stared at Seok and Cai, waiting for them to answer.
“It’s your phone, nae sereang,” Seok told her politely.
“Mine?” She remembered the phone Dr. Murray had given her and stuffed in her backpack this morning. “Shit.” She pulled off her backpack, digging through the front pouch. “Shit shit shit. Hello?”
“Nora? Hi. It’s Daniel. I’m sorry to bother you on your birthday, but I need you to come in for an interview. A colleague of mine is here from VMI and I want him present for the next part of your interview.”
“I’m actually on the top of Mount Charlotte,” she answered, glad for an excuse. “Tomorrow?”
“Nope. He’s here only one day before he heads back to Virginia. I need you as soon as you can get here. We’ll wait.”
“But Dr. Murray…” Cai and Seok's faces had darkened when they heard who she was speaking to. “I have plans today.”
“I’m sorry, Nora. I know it’s your birthday. I wouldn’t have asked you, but this was a surprise visit. I only learned this morning. Please?”
He didn’t demand she come. He didn’t remind her she was contractually obligated to participate whenever he wanted her. But she had no choice. Together, Cai and Seok walked toward the picnic table and put on their backpacks.
“Okay, Dr. Murray. I’ll be there as soon as I can.”
“Thank you, Nora.”
I’m sorry,” she apologized to the guys.
Seok shrugged. “It’s okay. We still have the walk down.”
But Nora’s earlier mood was gone. She remembered what Jessica said at her last interview; her next appointment would include questions about her relationships. And she wasn’t ready to talk to anybody about it. It wasn’t because she was ashamed, though she’d be lying if she wasn’t nervous about how others would view her. It certainly helped that the last few weeks she’d been persona non grata everywhere she went. She’d had a taste of what shunning was like.
Her biggest worry though, wasn’t how much further she could fall in public opinion, but about the guys. Cai worked with young people. Ryan wanted to be a lawyer. Apollo would be a physical therapist. If people viewed them as morally reprehensible, what would it mean for their careers? In all honesty, she didn’t think Matisse would care, and Seok was an island unto himself. He cared about his friends and Nora. He didn’t seem to care about anyone else, but that could change if his business was impacted by their relationship.
“Have you guys told anyone about us?” she asked.
“No.” Cai answered first. “I don’t know exactly what I’d say if someone asked me. Or if it’s anyone’s business but ours.”
Seok shook his head. “I don’t talk to anyone about anything personal outside of our circle. It’s no one else’s business.” He turned around, walking backward so he could watch Nora. “Why?
“I’m afraid Dr. Murray will ask me about my relationship.”
“Let him.” Shrugging, he cut a look at Cai. “Eventually, Nora, it’s going to come out. We’re going to have to deal with it.”
“But not necessarily right this minute,” Cai interjected. “Not at the same time she’s already dealing with the shooting fall-out.”
“If I lied to him…” She hesitated. “It wouldn’t be because I was ashamed.” She met their gazes and saw understanding, and in Cai’s face, relief.
“I am worried about how it could impact me, professionally,” he allowed. “Yet, I wouldn’t change it. I want to be with you, Nora.” He made sure he had her complete attention before continuing. “I’m…" Glancing at Seok, he began again, “I’m falling in love with you. I’m in it for the long-haul.”
“I love you, too,” she whispered when he kissed her.
Lips tickled her neck, and the heat of Seok’s body crowded her from behind. “If we’re making declarations, then let me make mine as well. I love you, Nora.” His breath tickled her ear, the words so low she didn’t think even Cai heard them.
Cai’s lips left Nora’s, allowing her to turn into Seok’s embrace, but she tightened her grip and reached to hold them to her. Their heads bowed into her neck, one on each shoulder as they held onto each other.
“This is the best birthday.”
Both of them nodded, and took her hands, tugging her to walk again. They continued in silence with only the distant sound of traffic and the occasional call of a crow. Their car was the only one in the dirt parking lot.
“Hungry?” Seok asked as he pulled out of the lot onto the main road.
“No.” Her mind raced ahead of her, working out what she should expect from this interview with Dr. Murray. “What university is VMI?”
“I don’t know,” Seok answered.
Cai took out his phone. “Virginia Military Institute,” he read. “Why?”
“Dr. Murray told me the interviewer was from VMI. I’ve been trying to figure out what the letters stood for.” She paused. “I didn’t realize military institutes did research. I thought they were mostly officer training places. Map reading, and, I don’t know, The Art of War.”
Seok snorted, but Cai answered thoughtfully, “I didn’t know they did either. I think we should come with you.”
“You can’t come in the interview with me, Cai.”
“But we could wait.”
Seok nodded his head.
“It takes a really long time. My first interview lasted almost four hours. Oh no!”
Cai whipped around in the seat, looking at her. “What?!”
“What time are our dinner reservations? What time is it now?”
He clenched his teeth. “Crap, Honora. You scared me.”
“Sorry, but I don’t want to miss it. Are either of you wearing a watch? That way I can just take off if they aren’t finishing in time?”
Seok fiddled with something and then reached back, handing her a giant man-watch. The inside of the band was warm from his skin when she put it around her wrist. It was more like a bangle than a watch, sliding up and down her arm. She liked having something of his on her body; the idea of looking at it and thinking of Seok during the interview comforted her.
The traffic was stop-and-go the closer they got to the college, and her nervousness morphed to nausea. Seok pulled into the parking lot behind Converse Hall and turned around. “I’m coming in. I’ll be in and out the rest of the day. We’ll be back to pick you up at five. Want us to bring you so
me lunch?”
Her stomach was a jumbled mess; she couldn’t eat if she wanted to. She shook her head. “No, thanks.”
Seok and Cai opened their doors, waiting for her to get out. She slid across the seat, standing and stretching and unconsciously rubbing her stomach.
“How about some ginger ale?” Cai asked, watching her.
“Yes, please.”
The first floor of Converse was busy, students were rushing to offices and classrooms, chatting noisily. In a darkened corner, Cai found the ancient soda machine and fed it a few dollars before returning to her with a green can. Popping the top, she sipped it quickly. “Thank you.” The warm fizzy bubbles soothed her belly.
“What are you going to do while I’m in there?”
Seok shrugged, looking over at Cai. “We’ll figure something out. Don’t worry about us. We can always run home and come back.”
A door slammed behind them. Nerves frayed, she jumped, turning instinctively. A boy, baseball cap pulled low over his brows, walked out of the stairwell.
“Tyler!” Cai called out.
He jumped, body tense, and his face when he glanced up, was sweaty, and pale.
“Hey.” She stepped forward, grasping his shoulder. “Are you okay?”
“Yeah. Fine.” Without meeting her eyes, he took off his hat and rubbed the back of his hand across his forehead. “Hey man,” he greeted Cai. “What’s up?”
“Dropping Nora off. You eat yet?”
Face paling a little more, he shook his head quickly. “Nope.”
“Great. Seok and I will treat you, come on.”
Immediately, Cai took on the social worker role, setting Tyler at ease. Ish. Still, there was an unfamiliar tension around him. It was strange the way he wouldn’t meet her glance, eyes landing everywhere else. When Cai moved closer, clapping him on the shoulder affectionately, he flinched.
Weird.
“Did you have an interview?” she asked. It certainly was the source of her anxiety.
“It wasn’t bad.” His tone was off, everything about him was off. But she didn’t push. She met Cai’s stare; he noticed the same thing. Perhaps he’d get the truth from Tyler.
“Okay.” She’d leave them to it. “So, I’m going to go.”
“Good luck,” Seok said after hugging her. “Remember, we’ll be back.” One last kiss from Cai, and she needed to go.
You're stalling. Allowing herself a final glance, she opened the door.
When she got to the basement, Dr. Murray was in the hallway, speaking to Jessica. He turned when he heard her approach, smiling warmly, but with the right amount of apology. “Hey, Nora. I’m sorry, so thank you.”
She shrugged, glancing at her wrist and smiling when she saw Seok’s watch. “I need to be gone by five. I’m going out to dinner.”
The way she said it probably gave away that she hadn’t had a birthday dinner in, well, she’d never had a birthday dinner.
“Plenty of time then.”
Part of her anxiety revolved around getting out of there, and she relaxed somewhat. Now, she could safely push the worry aside.
“Happy birthday, Nora.” Jessica smiled at her. “Can you come with me so I can take some initial stats and then we’ll get started?”
“I thought you said someone else was here.” No one else was in the hall.
“He is. You’ll meet him in a minute. He just stepped out. Oh wait!” He walked to them, his hand outstretched. “Do you have the cell phone? I want to switch it out with a different model. I got a grant to upgrade.” Smiling, he rubbed his hands together.
“Okay.” She dropped her backpack to the floor, rooting around for the cell phone and handing it to him.
“Thanks,” he said. “I’ll be right back.” He jogged down the hall, and through the door leading to the stairs.
“Ready?” Jessica asked.
She opened the door to one of the rooms, and stepped inside, waiting for Nora to follow her. This room was different than the last one. The first room where she completed the IQ and personality testing was bright white and sterile. The sound had echoed off the cement, making her head pound. There was a two-way mirror, and a table and chairs, and was supremely uncomfortable.
This room was that room’s creepier twin. Not much had been done to renovate it. The walls were dark green, and chipped in places, revealing grey cement. The floor was the same linoleum as lined the first floor’s hallway, cream and orange tile, except stained. Flickering fluorescent lights would leave her with another headache, she was sure.
“How can you stand it?” she asked Jessica, who gestured to the one vinyl covered chair under the metal table.
She sat where she wanted, and waited. Jessica held up a finger, and then began to take her pulse. She was quiet so long, Nora wondered if she’d forgotten she’d been asked a question. Turning to the table, she took out the blood pressure cuff, and wrapped it around her arm.
Off-balance and anxious, she decided not to ask anymore questions. Jessica didn’t glance at the light, so it obviously didn’t bother her. A knock on the metal door made her jump as the cuff inflated again.
“Hey, Nora.” Dr. Murray poked his head in. “I’ve got to run off campus, for like, an hour. Jess, I need you.”
“You’re not doing the interview?”
“No. I’ll review the video later.” He pointed to the corners of the room. “Surveillance,” he said, and winked at her.
Jessica unwrapped the cuff and put it away. “They make me crazy,” she said as she placed the cuff in a bag. “I have a killer headache from the last interview. But our other interview room is being treated for asbestos. So we’re SOL.”
“Oh,” she replied, uneasily and drew her knees up to her chest, wrapping her arms around her legs. “Okay.”
“He’ll be in momentarily,” Dr. Murray said, making room for Jessica to pass by him. “Thanks again, Nora.”
You’re welcome? She gave him a smile she didn’t mean, and watched him leave, closing the door behind him. The lights continued to flicker, and then some fuse must have caught because they suddenly came on, along with a buzzing sound specific to fluorescence. She shifted her weight, crossing her ankles, and the chair tipped. Adjusting her weight, it tipped the other way. No matter which way she shifted, the chair rocked. Finally, she gave up, feet on the floor to brace herself and leaned her elbows on the metal table.
Only a few minutes had passed since the boys dropped her off. Reaching for her soda, she took a sip, tilting her head back to get the last few drops. With the lights on, she could better make out the room. It looked better in the dark. Now she could read what people had written on the walls, and some of it made her shudder. Strips of fly paper hung from the ceiling, and in the corners of the room—she peered closer— mouse traps? She picked her feet up again, but when the chair rocked, she sighed, putting them back on the floor.
Minutes ticked by. She wasn’t sure how long she spent examining the room, but it was long enough to think she’d been forgotten. Maybe Dr. Murray’s buddy thought they were in a different room, or his office. She swallowed. The idea of being alone in Converse Hall’s basement gave her goosebumps.
At least it wasn’t one of the morgue rooms Tyler told her about. Standing up, she walked over to the door and grasped the knob, but it wouldn’t turn. Thinking she might have pushed in a lock, she tried to twist it the other way. The knob barely turned at all, giving a little click, as if to let her know, yes, dummy, it still doesn’t work when you try this way, either.
Panic built in her chest. She pulled at the knob, wondering if it was one of those knobs she needed to push and turn to lock. But it remained firm. This is bullshit. She found her backpack, ready to pull out her cell phone to call the guys. Too bad for Dr. Murray, he would have to deal with disappointment. She wasn’t waiting around all day, in a murder room, for some dude she didn’t know to ask her questions she didn’t want to answer. She unzipped the pouch, shoving her hand inside, only to encount
er, nothing.
She’d given her phone to Dr. Murray. Of course. She snorted, shaking her head back and forth. Damn.
Going to the door, she pounded on it with her fist. “Hello?” she called.
She pressed her ear against the cold metal, listening intently, but she didn’t hear anything. She pounded on it again. “Hello?”
Nora got on her knees, cringing at the dirty floor. Tossing her braid to her back so it didn’t touch it, she lay down.
Through the gap between the tile and edge of the door, she could only see a few feet directly in front of her, but it was clear no one was there. She pressed her mouth closer to the gap and called out again, “Hello? Dr. Murray? Jessica?”
The room suddenly plunged into darkness, and she screamed, sitting fast. Her eyes opened wide, and her breath came in quick, audible pants.
Fuck fuck fuck fuck.
She couldn’t see anything, only slightly darker spots of blackness. She laid her head on the floor again, staring out at the bright floor in the hallway. “Seok! Cai!”
Her voice cracked, and she shut her eyes tightly, trying to calm herself before opening them again. For a moment, the thin shaft of light threw her back in time. Instead of being in the darkened room, Nora was in the cafeteria at the high school. And instead of looking into the hallway, she peered out of a doorway, making sure no one was waiting for her outside with an automatic weapon. For a second, she could see the blue sky, and the red dumpster. Crying out, she turned her head to the floor, squeezing her eyes shut.
Head pressed into the back of her hands, palms slowly warming the cold, gritty tile beneath them, she waited. Her knees ached where they rested against the floor, her quick breathing the only sound in the room.
Warm tears dropped onto her hands, and she choked. She turned her head to the gap again, this time keeping her eyes shut tight.
